The saga of the robotic mango-man. Part 1

Holy.

o-o

You managed to keep the same sense of disassociation, sadness and hilarity in combination with shock and what should be nonsense, but isn't because you take your reader in another direction instantly.

Awesome!!!! I love it!!!!

@lykopis:

Thank you very much for those words Lyko. But please, never give that amount of credit ever again. It will expand my ego to proportions it shouldn`t be in.

Like, to THESE proportions.

The pacing is- weird as hell! But I loved it... Don't ask me why... 'Cause i don't know, I feel like I shouldn't have.

@kfhrfdu_89_76k: well, that was interesting...

@project_worm:

/= )

@the_poet:

Funny, how many describe my work like that.

Wow that was kinda sad and depressingly cool and creepy! Nice!

@poze:

Thank you kindly.

@kfhrfdu_89_76k: Awww... you deleted it? :_(

@ficopedia:

Yeah, I deleted it from this thread, but I have it saved on a portable hard-drive, and since it's pretty clear you wanna read it I got it for you. Here you go!
But be careful! It's kinda silly and kinda bad.

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A stick figure woman (made of liquorice) sits in an outdoor laboratory (a white tent in a forest). Ponders. Then she ponders no more. She continues her latest work. A robot. She makes an intentional error to its programming. What for? You`ll find out soon enough.

It`s finished after two more months. The woman says, in a low, hopeful voice:

"Time to insert the power source."

She puts a battery to the standing robot.

"Now it`s time to...pull the switch."

She pulled a switch in the robots back. It started to:

Hummmmmmmmmmmm...

She was excited. Robots eyes started to glow pink.

The robot said: "What is this?"

The saga of the robotic mango-man. Part 1: Let`s call it an origin story

She had succeeded. It felt wonderment. She smiled."You have been born." Said the scientist, her voice trembling, trying not to shout of joy, because it might scare it.

Robot asked: "Oh. What does it mean, exactly?"

Scientist said: "Oh, silly me! I forgot to put the flash drive in place."

She took a green flash drive, and put it to a USB-gate.

Scientist said: "After 50 minutes, you will have 4000000000 terabytes of information in your brain."

"Is it alot?" Robot inquired.

There was a second of silence.
"Oh, I see that it is relatively alot." The robot understood.

"Good, the flash drive is in action." Said the intelligent female of her species.
"What do you feel?"

Robot said: "What is fe-Oh, I see. Well...Nothing."

"Nothing? Yeah, right." She snorted. "What do you think if I say...50 kittens?"

Robot said: "Nothing."

She said: "Obviously you do. You can`t use tones of voice, but for some reason, I know that you clearly have feelings. I can sense it, somehow. Which means that I`ve succeeded in creating an emotional robot."

Robot said: "I can assure you that I do not feel anything."

She said: "Nothing at all?"

Robot said: "Nothing."

Woman was a bit surprised. After being in this state for a minute, she said:

"We can easily find out if you have any emotions...by using an Emotio-meter."

Robot asked: "Is it your invention?"

She answered: "No. Okay, lets put this helmet to your head..."

This was done. Then she nibbed nables and dialed phone numbers. Then the numbers started to blink on the screen (meaning, they appeared on the screen for less than a second). Then they stopped blinking, and only number 57 was on the screen.

Scientist said: "I was right. You have emotions. I, succeeded! Hahah! In your face my mother, who never believed in my talents!"

Robot said: "I`m not your mother."

She didn`t know what to say.

She decided to say something nonetheless: "So...anyway, the point is, that I succeeded. Let`s celebrate."

Robot said: "I`m still not feeling anything."

Scientist was silent for a moment.

Then she said: "Yes you do..."

"No." Said the robot.

"Yes, you, do..." Said the woman.

"Not really."

"Y-e-s...yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes..."

"No."

"YES..."

"No."

"If I say yes, it`s a YES!!!!!"

"But I do not."

Once, again, silence...

Then our woman of science figured: "I see. You don`t know how it feels to feel."

Robot rebuked: "Yes I do. The information that I got clearly documents me how to feel."

"There must be an unintentional error in your brain...You don`t how it FEELS to feel.." The woman said, mostly to herself. She pushed her arms against her head, like you might do if you`re incredibly frustrated.

"What`s my name?" Asked the robot.

She said: "Ennnh...call yourself with any name you like."

Robot said: "Very well. I shall call myself Serial number 456805345."

Woman: "Why?"

Robot: "It reads on my leg."

Woman: "Yes well, I used second hand parts. The serial number shouldn`t be seen in it, I guess. But...I forgot to erase it."

Robot: "I see. I also hear. But I don`t smell, taste or feel. Some would consider it terrible. I don`t, because it would require an emotional reaction."

The scientist stared at the robot. She said:

"You know-"

Then, a Quarli man (A tank sized, soft, scallop looking creature. They have sharp teeth, a bait that they get with birth (many Anglerfish have it), seaweed like appendages, 17 eyes and eight legs. You`d think that these creatures would have originated from the seas, or have ancestors from there, but it isn`t so at all.) barged in and ate her. Then it barged away, moving at the speed of 150 miles per hour (they can keep on going without slowing down for six hours in a row).

Serial nro. looked at the few remains of her body that she had left. They weren`t bleeding, `cause this kind of liquorice doesn`t bleed.

It didn`t think it felt anything. Actually, it felt terror, massive sadness and was directionless.

But how could it be possible?

I guess that all of us will find out as we go on.

Serial nro. stayed there for 15 minutes and 27 seconds (and buncha smaller seconds, but let`s not get in to those) before saying...

"Well, can`t stay here. Stuff to do, world to see." It took a few important things that robots need, and left the place.

Well, you warned me. lol

It definitely needs some details as a print story. I think this would work better as an animated thing. It would be completely senseless, but it would be weird and trippy to watch. :)

Lol. I'd like to see more of this.

@the_impersonator:

Thanks! I never continued the story, 'cause I couldn't come up with anything good. And now-a-days I'm not interested in the slightest to continue this, lol. Sorry!

@cbishop:

Yes, I did. And yet you continued on in to that dreadful unknown. The sign of a true adventurer!

"It definitely needs some details as a print story."

When I envision it as an animation it's just a very simple back-and-forth-dialogue between two characters that is suddenly interrupted by a monster attack. Nothing too trippy if you ask me.
Maybe it feels trippy to you because I wrote it in a confusing way. Like, maybe it's difficult to understand which of the lines belong to which character. Trust me, it would be much easier to understand what's going on if I made this in to a comic instead. = D
I wasn't very good at writing prose 9 years ago. = D