Jarlaxle vs. Dr. Doom

Jarlaxle Baenre

vs.

Victor Von Doom, AKA Doctor Doom

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- In character

- Three months prep

- Almost no knowledge on each other

- Win by permanent death (Killing a doombot doesn't count. Similarly, if Jarlaxle has a resurrection contingency it doesn't count as a win.)

- Cheating is allowed

- Jarlaxle does his prep in Menzoberranzan. Doom does his prep in Latveria. Battle takes place in Gotham City, 1 mile apart from each other.

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Feats for Jarlaxle? Doom is serious business, so this Drow better have a lot going for him.

In 3 months Jarlaxle can call in, coerce, manipulate, sell or steal a favor from pretty much anyone on faerun. So really this entire fight comes down to which magic system you think is strongest, D&D or Marvel?

In 3 months, Doom can steal Beyonder's and Galactus's power, lay his hands on some cosmic cubes and the UN, maybe even score a jackpot of HotU. I don't know how powerful D&D is, but unless they have nigh-Omnipotents that are available for hire, Doom stomps.

@silverrings:

Manipulated the world's best warrior AND the world's best assassin. Manipulated all of Menzoberranzan, including the most powerful houses. Defeated a dracolich. Acquired Crenshibon. Got the most powerful of the drow on his side and made them his cronies. Whimsically breezes through kingdoms, breaks spirits and destroys people, comes out of everything clean on the other side. He's like fantasy Batman, times ten, and not trying. He is loaded down with so many magical items he needs extradimensional pockets to hold them all.

@thetruthiii: D&D has literal gods (not pansy "gods" like Thor but actual omnipotent deities) and dragons which aren't far off.

And you're saying Jarlaxle can manipulate these omnipotent beings to do his bidding? Then it's kind of a mismatch.

@thetruthiii: Honestly we've never truly seen Jarlaxle going all-out. He may or may not be able to (I wouldn't put it past him) though we know for an undeniable fact that he has access to Wish/Miracle spells, which is basically a one-off reality warp. And who knows how many rings/items of Wish he might have.

Forgotten Realms has some extremely powerful magic-users (Gromph, Elminster, etc., @floopay and @bruxae know more) and Jarlaxle tends to make them look like idiots.

Well, if he hasn't manipulated omnipotent beings before, than I guess Comic Vine's no feat rule states we can't automatically assume he is able to. So unless one of the magic users you stated can defeat a near-omnipotent deity, then I believe Doom wins.

@thetruthiii: Dooms not an omnipotent diety, he's a lonely old crazy man.

Doom can steal Beyonder's and Galactus's power, lay his hands on some cosmic cubes and the UN

Doom can do none of these things as they require plot not prep

@thetruthiii: I actually feel like he might have done something with Lloth (who is a god) but I didn't read the spider wars. I really need Floopay in here. :P He knows more about Jarlaxle than I do by a good bit.

Also he has access to things like dimensional locks so if Galactus gets involved he may actually be able to bind him, depending on how those things would fit together (if Galactus would count as an Outsider or not, which he likely would). If he counted as an outsider, Dismissal could temporarily get rid of Galactus as well.

Everything requires plot. If you were to disregard all feats that had the power of plot to back them up, 3/4th of what we use would be absolutely worthless.

Ah, well. I know squat about Jarlaxle, so I don't really have any authority to declare a winner.

What I mean is, can he acquire Galactus power without great risk, no, he needed materials he no longer has as they belonged to Galactus and Galactus may be an idiot but he would one shot him if he tried it again.

can he make or locate a cosmic cube without great risk, no

Then he can't do these things during prep as they involve variables way outside his control.

@dextersinister: Hmmm... guess that's pretty true. Alright, I submit. So who do you make the winner of this battle?

this is a fantastic thread. Jarlaxle is one serious customer and extraordinarily cunning.

However 3 months prep is insane to one with victor's intelligence, and he has his time travel capabilities. That may tip it over the edge in his favor I fear.

@cosmicallyaware1: Didn't Victor seriously screw stuff up when he tried to travel in time? End up naked in Africa or something?

Also theoretically Jarlaxle could travel in time as well, with Wish or some bizarre Temporal Hop loophole or something weird like that.

The only chance Jarlaxle has is if he brings more people with him.

By himself, he dies horribly, no matter how much cheating he does beyond that.

If he can bring like Elminster, Szass'Tam, the Simbul, Halaster, or many others with him by some miracle, he could pull a win.

(Please ignore spelling on their names, it has been years.)

Also, none of the gods in the Forgotten Realms are omnipotent, they are crazy powerful but not omnipotent.

@thetruthiii: Despite how much people overestimate Doom he would would take this unless you include outside help.

With outside help Jarlaxle is a an actual people person and Doom has burned a lot of bridges and anything he can coerce is going to be the kinds of things that can be banished.

They're certainly more omnipotent than Marvel gods.

There are no levels to being omnipotent, you either are or your not.

Lmfao, true....true on all points.

does jarlaxle get to use b'reagan d'arthe (probably spelled that wrong lol....didn't check just going off memory).....his band of subordinates? Those are some skilled individuals. If he uses his House Baenre boys (especialy gromph) them that's a dangerous thing indeed.

But......Doom has 3 months prep!!!!! The possibilities!

It's really a tough call IMO.....not sure how educated most here are in jarlaxle, he is very innovative.

@cosmicallyaware1: I'd say he can use Bregan D'aerthe since they are "his," so to speak, the same way Doom could use his doombots and latverian citizens in whatever way he wanted. He can't use the Baenres though, they are pretty well estranged.

Some of those words don't mean anything to me. I get the idea, though. I'm not seeing how the Drow could take down Thor in a close up fight, but he might be able to trick him somehow. Course, tricking him into dying isn't exactly easy. Doom is a genius, in several ways, so i'm just not convinced that Jar can take him down. But i wouldn't be, i don't know enough about him, i need more solid feats to go on.

Wish.

"I wish Thor was dead."

To be fair, Jarlaxle would get creamed by any adult or older Dragon (one not consumed by ego anyone, so basically any chromatic is out) and Elminster, and I think Drizzt is skilled enough to handle him unless he brings massive prep Drizzt is unaware of with plenty of toys. Which, if you know anything of Jarlaxle, he has a LOT of toys.

This is interesting, I can see Jarlaxle using some sort of polymorphic magic on himself and earning Doom's trust or trying some other sort of convoluted plan. Jarlaxle is crafty enough to make it work, and rarely underestimates his opponent in all honesty. He usually seems to expect equal cunning out of them. Doom on the other hand, doesn't tend to show the same precaution and does have that exceeding arrogance Jarlaxle loves to manipulate. I honestly think Jarlaxle might be able to take this, albeit with great difficulty.

I feel that outside help has got to be allowed here. Jarlaxle's entire schtick is weaving a web of powerful, influential or interesting people and beings that owe him, need him, or want him alive for whatever reason. Take that away and it's like having a battle with a de-powered superhero. Just not really the same character.

Yeah but if they are allowed you might as well just call this "Dr. Doom vs half of Faerun."

@irs: His shtick is also "having ALL the magic items," which he still gets here.

@granitesoldier: Jarlaxle has encountered Drizzt several times and always had the hilariously upper hand. He even did that little switcharoo with Entreri where he has Kimmuriel use stoneskin or however the hell that went (it was weird, I forget) so that Entreri could get over his rivalry.

@misterwhisper: @irs: doesnt he have magical items tooo tho?

I think Doom would win. He's likely better suited to the environment.

Effin LOL. good one.

@joygirl: Again, without Drizzt's knowledge of being "prepped" against. Is Drizzt a prepper? No, of course not. But if you honestly think if they squared off honorably that Jarlaxle would have a shot, well, I got nothing more to say haha. Jarlaxle really is cunning mixed with toys. He's Forgotten Realms Batman. Entreri is as good as they've come when it comes to matching Drizzt's skill, hell Entreri would mop Jarlaxle in a straight fight.

@granitesoldier: Well of course he would lose in a straight melee fight (barely; Entreri mentioned how impressed he was by Jarlaxle's fighting) but Jarlaxle doesn't do that. He manipulates people and uses his items, of which he has an endless supply. Exactly as you said, he's fantasy Batman and he's prepping for Doom here.

@misterwhisper: Not saying he should be allowed to bring them to the fight proper, but that he should be allowed to use them during his prep time.

@joygirl: I take offense at you calling Thor a Pansy.

I think Galactus would also qualify as an outsider. Being as that he is from the universe before this one.

I'm simply pointing out that Drizzt is familiar enough with Jarlaxle's wide array (not to mention his favorite toys like the sticky-wand) that he could probably take it if he knows Jarlaxle is coming. Of course, Jarlaxle does have that "endless cache" that he always seems to have the right tool any time. Drizzt also doesn't suffer from Doom's hubris. Doom's ego could spell Doom for Doom here, especially since Jarlaxle is the type to want to get close and intimate with a target and manipulate. He's likely to sabotage Doom's prep while Doom is prepping, so it works in Jarlaxle's favor. That sounds very much like something he'd do to someone as egotistical as Doom.

Yeah I would call that fair.

Its really hard to answer this one since they both have so much utility that could be used in so many different ways, in a straight up slugfest I think Doom would probably take it, but I dont see this going down that way. This is going to be a game of trickery and carefully laid plans, in the end.. I think ill give it to Jarlaxe, since Doom just cant possibly know what he is preparing for and how different this foe will work, true the same thing kinda goes for Jarlaxe but in the end he just has more tricks to suit the situation, D&D Magic is just sooo powerful he could bring almost anything to the fight with the amount of prep and resources he has, assuming he is desperate enough to really want to use them up.

I could easily see this swing any way in the end though, but if I had to guess id be going with Jarlaxe.

It's also worth noting that Jarlaxle can use divination to find out a ton about Doom and prep specifically for it.

Whoever Joy picks

Divination would not help you spy on someone in a different realm.

@joygirl said:

If that's a transferable power then sure. I don't know why it wouldn't be, but Thor is a different sort of god to the ones in Forgotten Realms. Anyway, that's not this fight. If Jar can just wish for shit then this isn't exactly fair, though, but Doom might be wish proof for all we know.

Doom in a massive stomp