DC Re-Imagined Martian Manhunter #1

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TommytheHitman

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#1  Edited By TommytheHitman

Rated M

The story opens up showing a perfectly normal looking Earth just spinning around in orbit completely normal.

Caption: Earth, Year 2012.

Martian Manhunter Caption: Today. Is the day...

Inside an apartment building we see an old man (John Jones) leaning over his mail box.

Martian Manhunter Caption: 57 years ago was when I arrived on this planet.

The old man closes his mail box. Nobody's sent him anything. Like always.

Martian Manhunter Caption: 57 years ago, I was chosen to protect this planet...

The Old Man turns around completely emotionless, blank.

Martian Manhunter Caption: Until my people arrive to destroy it.

We see Mars, again perfectly normal again nothing unusual.

Caption: Mars, 57 Human Years ago. 5 Martian Years ago.

Same Panel except a reasonably large meteorite starts to head towards Mars.

Malafic Ukk Caption: Nobody knows how it happened... *

Caption: *Translated from Martianease. (Just kidding.)

Malafic Ukk and J'onn J'onzz flying across the surface of Mars.

Malafic Ukk: All we know is that HE sent it!

J'onn J'onzz: Brother...

J'onn and Malafic floating in mid air and talking.

J'onn J'onzz: Do you jest?!

Malafic Ukk: No J'onn! Quickly we must arrive before the White race arrives!

Malafic and J'onn flying over a hill showing a massive temple in the meteor crash site.

J'onn J'onzz: ...

Both Malafic and J'onn landing in the temple. J'onn looks amazed while a Martian drone kneels before Malafic.

J'onn J'onzz: Incredible!

Drone: Lord Malafic the whites have arrived to take the temple! Our men are fighting against them and are holding their own.

Malafic: Excellent, prepare for reinforcements to be called in from Malfasia. We plan to be here a while.

The drone looks worried.

Drone: But... but my lord! We have suffered casualties and the White Martians are brutal and relen-!

Malafic slapping the drone causing the drone to fall to the floor.

Malafic: You dare question me?! You will be executed AND PARADED AROUND FOR THE ENTIRE CITY TO SEE! GUARDS!!

2 guards appear out of nowhere and place their hands on the drone.

Malafic: Take him to the Castle Ukk!

Drone: NO!

Malafic walking away as the drone is dragged out of the temple by the guards.

Drone: PLEASE! NO!!

Malafic walking up the stairs to meet J'onn who is inspecting some carvings on a wall.

Drone: NO!!!!

Malafic: I'm sorry you had to hear that J'onn but I can't have underlings undermining my rule.

J'onn and Malafic both stare up at the wall.

J'onn: What? Oh sorry were you saying something?

Malafic: What do you think these carvings mean?

The carvings on the wall show a Green Martian (J'onn) and a planet which is Earth.

J'onn: I... don't know.

Malafic: It's very dusty.

J'onn places his hand on the wall trying to wipe off the dust but his hand starts to glow as he touches the wall.

J'onn: Let me see if I can...

Hromneer: J'onn...

J'onn turning around suddenly.

J'onn: What?!

Instead of being inside of the temple J'onn appears in a pitch black area appearing before him is the Martian god Hromneer.

Hromneer: Hello J'onn...

To be continued...

Okay I hope you enjoyed issue 1 of Martian Manhunter I'm sorry it didn't have any action in it but it was really setting up what will be happening in the series soon!

Also if you haven't already check out the rest of DC Re-Imagined! http://www.comicvine.com/forums/fan-fic/8/dc-re-imagined-revived-library/752564/#11

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JamesKM716

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#2  Edited By JamesKM716

Keep It Up!

Interesting cliffhanger

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TommytheHitman

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#3  Edited By TommytheHitman

@JamesKM716 Yeah, I feel bad there wasn't any action. Unless you count Malafic slapping the drone.

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#4  Edited By wildvine  Moderator

Pretty solid. Not overly a fan of script form, but it was good nonetheless.

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#5  Edited By TommytheHitman

@wildvine: Yeah before I started writing the fan fic on comic vine I used to write them on Microsoft Word and after seeing how some writers wrote it I assumed that was how they all write them and now? I'm just used to it.

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#6  Edited By wildvine  Moderator

@TommytheHitman said:

Yeah before I started writing the fan fic on comic vine I used to write them on Microsoft Word and after seeing how some writers wrote it I assumed that was how they all write them and now? I'm just used to it.

*Nod* Nothing wrong with it. Purely a personal preference.

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batkevin74

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#7  Edited By batkevin74

@TommytheHitman: Not bad. Personally (and a lot of others as well) are well, scriptist! Stuff written in script form often gets overlooked. Now, it is a legitimate way to write and you should write anyway you feel comfortable, but if this was a story you may get more reads and comments.

For example: An old man shuffles to his letter box. The flag wasn't up, it was never up, but the twice daily ritual from the apartment steps to the box gave him something to do. Something asides from waiting for the inevitable. He covered his eyes as he gazed up to the sky, peering for some sign but nothing more ominous than clouds and sky. He sighed as he focused on a cloud, its shape reminding him of years gone by...

Mars: Two green skinned men fly across the surface of the Red Planet.

"All we know is that HE sent it!"

J'onn J'onzz looked at his brother Malafic "No, we don't KNOW that. That is why we are here"

**

It's all your stuff just in story form. Also just a suggestion, don't change just for me (or anyone for that matterr) but I thought I'd show you the other side of the coin. Scripts are good but often lack emotion and description.