W2O: The Glory Guards #3

Then...

"You are free, sisters! FREE!!!"

The Shining Knight, dressed in her high-tech suit resembling a medieval knight's armour, slashed the walls with her sword, allowing the inmates of the Dame Edna Correctional Facility for Women to get out. As they ran, some of them with weapons stolen from the guards, Shining Knight looked at them, padding herself on the shoulder for freeing these misunderstood and abused women.

"Are you HIGH!?"

Oh, great... her.

"I have no quarrels with you, Amymal." Shining Knight said to the woman in green spandex and domino mask. "Leave, and I shall spare you. After all, you are a part of the great sisterhood of women."

"Take your sisterhood and @#%&." Amymal turned into a rhino, and hammered herself into Knight. The Knight attempted to trust her blade through the creature's back, only to hit a gigantic turtle-shell instead.

Realizing that taking on a rhino-turtle in close combat would be a bad idea, she activated her suit's electric defence, giving Amymal a shock big enough to make her back away. Knight became airborne, and fired a salvo of bullets from her left rift. Amymal changed into a hummingbird, dodging the bullets.

"This is ridicules!" The Shining Knight pointed her sword toward her enemy, as it fired off blasts of energy. "Can't you see that what I do is right?"

"Freeing a bunch of dangerous felons?!" Amymal flew above the Knight, then transformed into an elephant.

"They are the result of living in a society dominated by men!" The Knight evaded being smashed, and the falling elephant turned into a flying falcon. "We women have to stand together against the male tyranny and-"

She was gone. Amymal had disappeared. As the Shining Knight wondered what kind of animal that could turn invisible, she noticed that her shoulder itched. A lot in fact.

Then her left arm, then her knees, then...

"Oh god, this is unbearable!" As a reflex, she started to scratch her arm, even though her whole body was covered in armour. "Alright, ALRIGHT! I get it! I give up! But for god's sake, STOP IT!"

The itching did not stop.

"STOP!" the Knight landed, took off her helmet clapped twice, activating the undress function, making her armour fall off. She was now nothing but a spindly woman with short, red, messy hair. "I'm done! I give up! Just, for heaven’s sake, make it-"

WHAM

Amymal turned from insect to human and punched Shining Knight's lights out. "Mosquito-flee. Works every time."

Now...

Carly Puckett, AKA the Shining Knight, was a well-known feminist terrorist. With her high-tech armour, she had spread chaos all around the country in the name of the sisterhood of women. She fought a never-ending battle against the men she believed oppressed her sex. She was an avenger of generations of women who had been misused and tormented by the male-dominated system.

Oddly enough, she didn't get as much praise as she had hoped for. No one called her a hero, no one supported her fight, no one discussed if she might have a point. A few (VERY FEW) forums could be found with a google search where they complimented her fight for women. But mostly, all she heard and read was that she was... nuts.

"Not interested."

Pucket had her back turned to her visitor; Captain Johnson. She looked out of her cell's only window. Not that she could see that much. She just didn't want to look at him.

"Come on, Mrs Pucket, hear me out-"

"No, I'm not interested in this rehabilitation program of yours. I want to get out of this damn place, but I'm not so desperate that I will allow men to dictate me."

"You do know that there ARE women in the American government, right?"

"Is Arnold Swarzenegger still president?"

"... Yes."

"Come back when a LADY is sitting in the oval office and when this program of yours is being led by a woman. THEN I might consider fighting aliens and monsters instead of the oppressors of my sisters."

"What about your ex-wife?"

"... Pardon?"

"Your ex-wife, Ulla Simpson."

Pucket turned around and looked at Johnson with irritation drawn all over her face.

"... What about her?"

"If I have understood it correctly, she suffer from leukaemia, am I right?"

"... Yes, I know that... Thank you for taking up something VERY personal and rub it in my face. That really makes me-"

"If you join the Glory Guards, we will, as well as knocking a few years of your sentence, also donate money to your ex-wife's treatment. Interested?"

At first, Pucket wanted to tell Johnson to get the hell out of her cell and not use her ex-wife as a bargaining object. But as she opened her mouth, she closed it again while biting her lower lip. Then, she sighed, and mumbled for herself; I will do it for you, Ulla.

"Fine, I will join your team, Captain Johnson. But just so you know; I think the whole idea sucks."

"That makes two of us." Johnson said, as he handed her the contract.

@boschepg:

@admirallogic:

@stahlflamme:

@jackalantern: @impurestcheese: @heroup2112: @flumox56: @stumpy49er: @cbishop:@tommythehitman:

Glory Guards chapter 3.

@waezi2: Interesting. Couldn't help thinking of this guy though...

Pretty sweet dude, this is shaping up nicely.

Hmm, femanist knight intresting. I like

Sorry it takes a while before I get the team in action, but I just want to flesh out the characters first.

@impurestcheese: Well, there's feminist, then there is Ally McBeal feminist... and then we have Carly Pucket, the CRAZY feminist:P

@heroup2112: Glad you like it.

@cbishop: Man, I totally forgot about him. And he is one of the heroes of my favorite JLU episode; Patriot Act.

I named her Shining Knight as in the knight in shining armor is the one who saves the damsel in distress.

I get it. That's probably the inspiration for the DC character too. Enjoying it. :)

@waezi2: Hmm wonder where I fall in that scale

@impurestcheese: Well, you are not insane. And you aren't mean, unintelligent and superficial.

So I would say that you are a feminist.

Now I agree. (Love you, Imp'!) ;)

@waezi2: @cbishop: Ah thanks guys

@boschepg:

@admirallogic:

@stahlflamme:

@jackalantern: @impurestcheese: @heroup2112: @flumox56: @stumpy49er: @cbishop:@tommythehitman:

Which name is better for a cowboy themed superhero; Blue Bull or Rodeo?

@waezi2: Rodeo. Blue Bull sounds more like a Native American name... although it evokes Babe- the blue ox that belonged to Paul Bunyan. :)

@waezi2: Rodeo.

Rodeo....in Texas, Blue Bell is a super famous brand of ice cream ;) Other good cowboy names, Pecos, Reno, Sage, sagebrush, Call, Deadeye, Kid, Wild (name), Wildcard, Desperado, Gaucho, Grit, The Kid, Ranger, (any cowboy sounding U.S. State) Montana, Wyoming, Arkansas, Arizona, Texas, Nevada, Oklahoma, Raven, Crow, Sundown, Rango, Durango, Those are just a few off the top of my head hope they might help or lead you in the right direction, or at least were not bothersome ;)

... Really?

That almost makes me want to call him Blue Bull :D

@waezi2: Rodeo. Blue bull sounds like a drink.

@waezi2: lol Only because being Dutch has done something to your brain. Being Texan has done something worse to mine, because I thought you wrote Blue BELL, not Blue BULL. lol anyway, I hope ANY of the info I gave you was helpful, if only to know what to steer (lol steer, get it?...got I wish I was funny instead of so damn good looking..ah well) away from ;)

@heroup2112: Dude, I'm not Dutch, I'm Danish :D

(Though I wouldn't mind being Dutch. My home country are at the beginning of becoming fascists)

Thanks for the info.

Ah, Denmark I forgot, sorry. aaannd, no fascism is not good however you look at it.

@heroup2112: Tell that to the refugees who has their jewelry and wedding rings confiscated once they reach the country.

@waezi2: I wasn't being sarcastic. Also, I didn't know things like that were going on, YOUR country is doing this?

@heroup2112: Sadly, yes. We are not exactly... friendly toward who we consider foreigners.

Recently, a young man who was born and raised in Denmark, is not going to get his citizenship because he wrote an article that some politicians considered "un-democratic".

That is, of course, a load of %¤#& because we have free speech in this country.

I am very much ashamed.

@waezi2: The phrase “Eternal vigilance is the price of liberty” has been used so often, by so many people it's hard to find who originally said it, but it's true all the same. Hopefully this state of affairs in Denmark won't last long. Most countries have had periods in their history where mistakes like this have been made (usually when a single political party has gained too much power, or for too long) then people come to their senses and things get squared back away. It's only when they don't that problems arise. I'd almost want to send you over to a "free speech" thread I'd been debating on recently to support my side, but you've got enough going on. I'll do some more digging into this issue for you and see how serious I problem I think it might be. Granted you actually LIVE there, so your view is probably better, but it can't hurt for two different points of view , eh?

@heroup2112: Sure, go nuts. My view has probably been damaged by living there. I constantly expect the worst. There are plenty of things I don't like about my country, such as the royal family, since I think it's about time we become a true democracy and that they use too much of our money with the excuse that they are "a symbol for our Danishness" and that they "increase tourism".

... Yeah, I'm an anti-patriot...

@waezi2:

Well, there are certain things about MY government that could make me say I'm not patriotic toward my government. I am patriotic about my system of government, and how it's designed to work, and how because of it, things tend to even out in the wash. However, it's certainly not fool proof. I also don't envy you your form of government, I will tell though that there is MUCH worse out there. I'm still researching yours to see if there's not somehow you can go about being an agent of change, or joining the agents of change if you wish to. I don't know how big a pain in the butt that will be for you at this point. I'll let you know.

Okay, I've done a little checking. Denmark has limited free speech. Beyond non protected speech/press aimed at preventing immediate injury or criminal harm (yelling fire in a movie theater, child pornography, publishing state secrets) there are also anti religious blasphemy, and anti hate speech laws on the books. However, was there a particular law cited where this young man can't get his citizenship because of "un democratic" speech? (going to try to find that now). Also, are you not granted citizenship at birth? (going to try to look that up too)

@heroup2112: Oh believe me, I know there are worse, and there are plenty of benefits you get by being a Danish citizen. It's our spirit I have a problem with, as well of our (what I assume is) fear of anything foreign. We apparently believe that we have to insult religious people (mostly Muslims) just to prove that we have free speech. Have you herd about the Muhammad cartoons crisis?

My favorite example of our relationship to foreigners(everyone in my country is a foreigner as long as they aren't white, even if they have been born here. We don't use words such as afroamerican, we say second-generation foreigner) is an event from December 2012. A housing association decided not to spend money on a Christmas tree since it would be unnecessary as long as they had decorations. The whole country went nuts because 60% of the members of the board who made the decision were Muslims, and newspapers wrote about Muslims being against Danish values and that Muslims had some sort of masterplan to kill Christmas. An old(white) woman ended up moving away because the journalists bothered her about the damn tree she didn't even CARE about.

And guess what? The board-members decided to buy the damn tree so that the journalists and hysterical Danes would leave them alone.

It is one of the most embarrassing moments of my life(as a Danish Citizen).

@waezi2: Never let it be said I won't call my own mistakes. Earlier I said Amymal was introduced in Power Platypus. Clearly I was mistaken. But in my defense she isn't in the character list. So, split the mistake on this one? Yeah? Moving on then.