Issue Information
Title- Uncanny X-Men Annual (Volume 1) #7
Release Date- December 1983
Writer- Chris Claremont
Artist- Michael Golden & Bret Blevins
Major Notes
Features the Impossible Man
Brief Summary
Scavenger Hunt
The X-Men are playing a game of baseball while Professor Xavier and Lilandra watch on. Colossus hits the ball and it flies up into the air out of sight. They suddenly see something large coming down towards them and Lilandra is terrified when she sees that it is the ship of Galactus. The being himself soon appears and claims to come in peace. Xavier tries to probe the mind of Galactus but a feedback knocks him out. Galactus demands to have the home of the X-Men but the team aren’t willing to give it up without a fight but their efforts are for naught. There is a flash of light and the next thing the team see the X-Mansion is gone along with Galactus and his ship.
Later the X-Men are attempting to track down Galactus as they fly in the X-Jet. They are unsure whether they should be attempting to battle a being of such power but Xavier’s telepathy can pinpoint his exact location. It takes them to the S.H.I.E.L.D hellicarrier although the team are surprised that Galactus can even fit in the hellicarrier.
In the private quarters of Nick Fury he is sharing some personal time with his love Valentina Allegro. They go to kiss as someone tries to grab Nick, Kitty Pryde then phases in through the roof goes to grab the stranger but he transforms into a snake. Nick is very surprised and Lockheed bursts through the wall as the stranger transforms into a wooden Native American and escapes. Kitty realises what is happening inside the room and she tries to apologise to the very unhappy Nick Fury. He demands answers as Nightcrawler teleports in, grabs Kitty and Lockheed before teleporting away. S.H.I.E.L.D agents soon come investigating but Valentina notices that Nick’s eye patch is missing.
A short time later in the Savage Land the X-Men arrive trying to locate this strange person who has stolen the X-Mansion and Nick Fury’s eye patch. They are met there by Ka-Zar and Shanna who ask for their assistance finding Zabu who has been taken. Rogue begins to think that whoever is behind the thefts is performing some kind of bizarre scavenger hunt. The team dismiss this as a silly idea but Xavier thinks that there is some merit to it.
Later at the Avengers Mansion She-Hulk is the only Avenger present and she sees the Fantasti-Car filled with the stolen objects on the screen. The intruder alarm is going off and Avengers Butler Jarvis is there as well. She-Hulk sees Rogue and Colossus right next to the Fantasti-car and she believes that they are the intruders and she runs outside to confront them.
When she reaches outside Rogue and Colossus are looking for the thief who has stolen Wasp’s various costumes and escaped. She-Hulk attacks Rogue and then goes to punch Colossus but he is able to block the punch. Before he can counter he is shot in the back by Iron-Man who is floating above.
At the Sanctum Sanctorum Doctor Steven Strange is looking over a book when Sigil window is suddenly stolen without warning. Without it being there all manner of ghosts and demons begin to escape.
The escape is heard at the Avengers mansion and with She-Hulk and Iron-Man distracted Rogue grabs onto She-Hulk and begins to absorb her powers. Rogue’s costume begins to tear as her muscles expand and Iron-Man tries to blast her with not effect. Colossus then grabs him and slams him to the ground, he isn’t very happy that they were attacked without reason. But before they can fight Kitty phases up through Iron-Man causing him to short circuit. She apologises for causing it to happen but she tells her teammates that they must leave and they quickly do leaving the two Avengers down.
A little later the X-Men break into the basement of the Hellfire Club where they see a still unconscious Emma Frost. For her crimes the X-Men consider killing her in her sleep and Wolverine even goes to perform the act but is stopped by a water pistol suddenly appearing him and squirting him in the face. Sebastian Shaw comes bursting through the door and Rogue goes to punch him. He absorbs her punch and attacks her back almost knocking her unconscious. Nightcrawler tries to distract Sebastian to save Rogue but unseen the thief transforms into a balloon and steals the costume that Jean Grey wore while she was in the Hellfire Club. Storm is particularly angered that the thief has gotten away and creates a tornado that lifts the X-Men out of the room leaving Sebastian in there with the unconscious Emma Frost.
At 575 Madison Avenue the Impossible Man is inside and is disappointed to find that it is empty. He does find a flyer on the ground while not so far away the X-Men travel to his location. Xavier tells the X-Men not to harm the thief and that he is sensing him moving downtown.
At Marvel Comics HQ at Park Avenue staff members Eliot Brown and Editor Mark Gruenwald are just about to enter the elevator when what seems to be Ghost Rider fly through on the back of Zabu. They are very confused but the X-Men then burst in so that they can corner the thief before he gets away again. They burst through the Marvel Comics offices and they eventually find the thief who has transformed into a pop-up head of Stan Lee. When he sees the team the thief transforms into a plane and tries to fly away. Inside another office Michael Hobson and Jim Shooter are having a discussion when they hear the commotion taking place outside.
The team have figured out that the thief is after Stan Lee although he is in California and that the thief himself is the Impossible Man. They merely want to stop him and Rogue figures that her mutant abilities could do the job. She lunges at the Impossible Man as he is jumping around and there is a flash of light that causes her to fall down to the ground. The Impossible Man is angered that she tried to hurt him and Wolverine is up for the fight. When the team call him a monster the Impossible Man states that he is not a monster and that Rogue is still breathing. When she had attacked he had panicked and that the thefts had all been a part of a game. The objects that he has taken are safely tucked away and he is genuinely sorry for what he has done. He takes the X-Men away so that he can show them where the stolen items are leaving a bemused Marvel Comics staff.
The X-Men soon appear in the Gobi Desert where the Impossible Man has hidden all of the items that he has stolen. When he is asked why he stole all the items he begins to explain that after his home planet was eaten by Galactus his people couldn’t decide who should be their leader. This led to the scavenger hunt and the X-Men begin to go through some of the items that were stolen. But as he continues to explain a horde of space crafts flying above them.
Suddenly a small army of aliens arrive on the ground. They demand justice on the Impossible Man and his people for what they have stolen. Wolverine is up for a fight but Lilandra thinks that a more peaceful solution is the best idea. She introduces herself to the aliens who know of her and allow her to speak. She assures them that everything will be returned in the condition that they were taken. At first the aliens still want retribution but the thought of going to war with the Impossible Man’s people is a daunting thought so they reluctantly agree.
Later Kitty and Illyana are sitting by the pool at the X-Mansion with the Impossible Man sitting by them. He is crying after giving up everything that he has stolen and he sees the two girls eating ice creams. He transforms into Magnum P.I and the two girls look at him lovestruck, they hand him their ice creams and as he transforms into Garfield the Cat all three of them exclaim that this is the end of the story.
My Thoughts
Now we are here at the seventh annual of the Uncanny X-Men series (The fifth original annual since the first two were simply reprints). This is a very odd and whacky story that did confuse me at some points. It features the Impossible Man who is most associated with Marvel’s first family the Fantastic Four. Basically he has the ability to do almost anything hence the name, he can do what is considered to be scientifically impossible (like many Marvel Characters).
I think in this month since the main editors were away the writers were free to be able to write more whacky, self contained stories. I admit that this story is very different to what you would normally see in an X-Men comic, it had its pros and its cons and it is something that you like to see every now and again but not on a regular basis.
The comic also featured other characters that you don’t normally see in an X-Men comic. Like Nick Fury, She-Hulk and more importantly the Impossible Man himself. We also got to see many of the creators of the Marvel Comics that were being released at the time. It is sometimes a little fun to see them appear the odd time in a book, kind of like a director of a film having a cameo appearance but they featured just a little too much for my liking. Although I do think the man himself Chris Claremont did make an appearance. That was pretty cool.
I believe that this is the first time that we see the team playing a game of baseball. It seems out of all the sports the X-Men seem to enjoy playing that one the most although I have seen times when they play football (the American kind) and basketball. I wonder if they have ever played Ice Hockey or football (the one that the rest of the world is familiar with). I think I have seen a couple of them playing tennis though.
This is also an issue that you could consider the team actually break the fourth wall when at the end Kitty, Illyana and the Impossible Man all state that it is the end. You can also see just how popular Magnum P.I was at the time since he has been mentioned numerous times in New Mutants and a few times in the Uncanny X-Men. Just too bad that Tom Selleck couldn’t play Indiana Jones or else his career wouldn’t have stalled.
The overall story was very whacky and I did get a little lost at a few places. It had some things going for it and a few things going against it but it was an enjoyable read. Not up to the same level as the rest of the Uncanny X-Men series but it is still worth reading.
In conclusion I’m giving the issue a 6 out of 10. It was alright but not up to the same standards as the rest of the series.
Next Issue
Daredevil (Volume 1) #197 (A little late)
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