The On the Stump wiki last edited by Saren on 06/29/13 12:33PM View full history

In the first of three self-contained issues, Spider is drawn into The City's corrupt political arena, leading to a terrible confrontation with the President of the United States...in a men's room. And Spider is assigned an assistant to keep him in line--but she's not what he expects.

The issue begins with Spider naked and writing (possibly never a good sign), He's then interrupted by his boss who wants his column now, Spider tells him to get off and that the column isn't due until a few days anyway. It's at that point, his boss tells him he's getting an assistant, he gets quite mad about that and stands up to go blast what he thinks will be some punk kid he can't work with with his Bowel Disruptor, but when he gets there...it's Channon Yarrow, an ex-stripper whom he had met before.

The two exchange a few brief words (basically Spider telling her everything he wants her to do), She comes back sometime later...this time, Spider's wearing pants. They discuss the world and more-so Spider's odd views on it as well as journalism etc.

Soon enough, the TV comes on with a message that the president will be coming to town. Spider immediately shouts out "LETS GO SEE THE PRESIDENT".

Spider and Channon then go out to town, he manages to get into the Presidents address and it isn't long before Spider snoops around and finds the president BEFORE the address..in the rest room of all places.

He's mumbling to himself about cheap Australian whores and having hard time peeing when Spider walks in, the two get into a war of words that eventually ends with Spider throwing him into a stall and using the "Bowel Disruptor" on him..set to "Prolapse".

Spider walks out and tells Channon they need to leave.

"Why?" she asked.

"HELP! THE PRESIDENT'S SHAT HIMSELF!" the Secret Service cried out.

Then Channon and Spider leave.

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