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A rash of petty thievery has plagued the shopkeepers of Springfield for far too long! Taking the law into their own hands (with the blessing of the Springfield Police), three men vow to stop ne'er-do-wells in their good-for-nothing tracks. Three mere mortals will stare villainy in the eye and dare it to blink ?? three vigilantes who comprise the Merchants of Vengeance. Be there as an alliance is formed, a bond is forged, and (as usually happens to such bonds and aforementioned alliances) a confidence is betrayed!

1. In Burn$ We Tru$t! i.e. In Burns We Trust!

Mr. Burns want to buy a church, but Reverend Lovejoy suggests that he "sponsor" it instead. Mr. Burns invests a lot of money, and just about does become the owner, then kicks Lovejoy out. Bart and Lisa find Lovejoy, and they all agree to break in the church to see what Burns is up to. When they do, they find out Burns wants to be Pope! Then when Mr. Burns arrives, he is informed that since it is a Protestant and not a Catholic church, there isn't any Pope. So the church is given back, and Mr. Burns goes home.

2. How Marge Got Her Curtains Back (Jesse L. McCann, Abby Denson)

Marge and Homer go to Ogdenville to get some curtains replaced and uncovers a curtain black market!

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