My name is Izuku Midoriya, and I live in a world where 80% of the world population has super powers. And one day, I will become a great superhero!
Sorry, but you will never have any powers.
Oh… Well, I guess I will just have to deal with the fact that all men are not created equal and that I will never fulfill my dream.
Don’t worry, young man! You might be powerless, but you can STILL become a great hero!
You mean that even though I was born without powers, I can compensate for it through hard work and that way prove my worth despite being inferior compared to others?
No! I mean that I, thanks to plot convenience, will give you my powers by making you eat my hair!
After Flashpoint rebooted the DCU, me and Black Canary have never been in a romantic relationship. But now, one of DCs most iconic couples are a thing again!
Nag nag nag, you can’t oppose the man if you ARE the man!
Bicker bicker bicker, I’m breaking up with you due to petty reasons!
It’s a story about an overpowered manchild and his gang who wrecked havoc based on an assumption.
Good people were hurt because they decided to oppose this glorified bully.
Homes and livelihoods were completely destroyed, all to satisfy the needs of a green brute…
… whom we are suppose to believe is the GOOD GUY?!
And to make it worse, Hulk’s character is completely retconned so instead of being a complex grey area character, he is now a misunderstood giant who never harmed an innocent soul.
Seriously, who in their right mind would think that this is a GOOD story?
It is no secret that Kyle hate Cartman with his very soul… so why hanging out with him at all?
Sure, no one in South Park really likes Cartman at all, they tolerate him since there seems to be no alternative. But Kyle and Cartman has a special hate-love relationship with extra much hate in it. Cartman constantly tests Kyle’s patience over and over again.
But WHY does Kyle allow Cartman the opportunity to irritate him so much? Why is it that Kyle constantly tries to berate the fat sociopath even though he knows that it is fruitless?
In an episode called “Smug Alert” Kyle moves away from South Park. Cartman celebrates the departure of the Jew, but he realizes that he NEEDS Kyle as a verbal punching bag, someone he knows will constantly be angered by whatever he does. That made me thinking; Maybe Cartman is an object of fiction for Kyle as well.
Kyle Broflovski is best known as the moral compass of South Park who does his best to be a person who does the right thing. But if you ask me, well… it seems to me that Kyle is more interested in being right than doing right. Kyle is a very intelligent young man with a strong sense of logic, and when his logic is challenged, he won’t let it go. A HUGE handicap when you are a character in the crazy world of South Park where stupidity and craziness runs amok.
In other words: Kyle Broflovski is the Frank Grimes of “South Park”.
Grimes is a Simpsons character who only stared in one episode… because he DIED in said episode. He died after losing his sanity, trying to prove a point: That Homer is a fool who only survives because the world around him allows to accept his stupid nature. But realizing that proving that Homer is a moron is pointless AND that he will do surprisingly well in life despite his inabilities that would have made him starve to death anywhere else in the world, Frank goes nuts and kills himself.
Alright, so Kyle hasn’t lost it and caused his own death. BUT he does what Frank did: Constantly gets involved with a person he does not like due to an obsession. Kyle keeps letting Cartman provoke him, Kyle keeps debating with Cartman, Kyle keeps making bets with Cartman. But what is the point? Cartman never learns his lesson, Cartman won’t suffer any consequences(or he will ignore said consequences). But Kyle won’t do what everyone else does and just tolerate Cartman, he HAS to be on Cartman’s case, trying to make him see that he is a terrible person.
DUDE, Yugioh cards are totally boss! I’m gonna buy a ton of these bad boys and become the best duelist EVAH!
Stop, young Waezi2! You don’t know what you are about to do!
Whoa, who the hell are you?
I’m you, from the future! I’m here to stop you from getting too invested in this stupid game!
Bro, what are you talking about? Yugioh rocks!
It might seems so, but as time pass, there will be made more and more cards that will outdate the ones you have collected. You will end up resenting the game and be pissed over the time and money you wasted on it! STOP WHILE YOU STILL CAN!!!
No way, bro. I’m not gonna do what you tell me to, you’re old!
Then you leave me no choice! I must kill you so that-
AAAAAHHH!!!
*thump*
Bro… are you dead?
No, I crapped my pants. And I forgot my old person diapers! DAMN IT ALL, I CAN’T MOVE!
RADICAL! Now I can buy all the Yugioh cards and DVDs I want, and you can’t stop me, homie!
Please, don’t do this! You WILL regret it! It will partly ruin your future!
DUDE! This comic is totally boss! I hope it NEVER EVER ends!
Well, I’m an adult now, and I understand that it is best to let your favorite stories have fulfilling conclusions instead of dragging it out. And I’m sure DN Angel will have one pretty soon.
Game over, Robot! I’m gonna fly you into space and then I will kill you, freeing the planet from your tyranny!
Mark… What the HELL are you doing?!
Well, I’m saving the world, and-
For Pete’s sake, have you forgotten our talk in issue 114? I made the world a better place, I am the “good guy” so to say! Everyone has pleasant lives, Earth has been improved in all ways since I took charge of the planet’s safety. Have you even thought about what will happen after I die? You could end up causing chaos, undoing all the good I have done, make everything worse! What will you do to make sure that you won’t make everything worse?
Um… I will… figure something out.
YOU MEAN YOU ACTUALLY DON’T HAVE A PLAN!? Mark, you left the planet, knowing that it would benefit with me in control, and that killing me would be catastrophic! Why, after all these years, ARE YOU DOING IT NOW!?
Because… Well… Look, you are being a dick, THAT’S WHY!
I’m being a dick?! Mark, of all the dumb crap you have done in your life, and that is a REALLY LONG list, this has to be the most-
Sorry, couldn’t hear ya over the sound of me punching you through your guts.
Professor, we keep saving the world, why do we have to be hated so much by everyone?
Our abilities are a gift as well as a curse. Mankind has always feared what they do not understand.
That’s not why we hate you! We hate you because you are douchebags!
I… beg your pardon?
You keep trying to blow up the world, even when you are NOT possessed by something, you let super-villains join your team, giving them refugee so that they won’t have to be responsible for what they have done, and when some of you have psychic powers, you think it gives you the right to invade our minds without hesitation! That’s a violation of privacy! Total dick-move!
Oh, well, when you put it like that-
And it doesn’t help that some of you dress in creepy costumes that more or less screams super-villain!
I’m not THAT creepy...
So, to put it short: We don´t hate you because we are bigots, we hate you because you guys are assholes!
Prepare yourself, Iron Man! You are about to suffer defeat by the hands of Obadiah Stane, one of your greatest enemies!
Greatest enemies? More like Lex Luthor RIPOFF!
That is NOT true! I’m a bald, brilliant and ruthless business man who is obsessed with besting my enemy no matter what! I make countless brilliant schemes, my greatest weakness is my ego and… wait… oh my god, you are right!
GOODBYE, CRUEL WORLD!
… Dude!
(PS: Read this spoiled text after posting a comment YES, I´m aware that Obadiah Stane was created before Luthor’s modern redesigned. so you could argue that Lex is ripping off Stane. Just wanted to see how many comments I wold get about being wrong:P)
Am am Thanos, the one they call the Mad Titan. And I gained the power of the Heart of the Universe, making me the most powerful being in all of existence. Cosmic omnipotent beings as well as all of Earth’s heroes tried to stop me, but I absorbed them as well as all of space and time.
And then I gave up on my existence to restore the universe and cure it of a sickness that would doom it. I saved everything that lives, the universe is still here thanks to me, yet no one will ever know. One question remains:
Adam Warlock… Do you STILL think I’m a little wuss?
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