In universe the only person to blame is the Joker. He did it. Its his fault. Bruce failed to make it in time, sure. Even Bruce believes it was his fault and he carries that cross to this day. In retcon, Batman writers have changed the story that "This horrible tragedy happened and it was aweful. Joker killed Jason." to "Jason killed himself by being a reckless, ill-behaved emotional nutjob who never did anything Bruce told him.". But in the end, Bruce is responsible for Bruce's actions. And for the writers who have done this "retconning", its dumb and its stupid to pigeon hole Jason's death on him or Jason himself.
Joker did it. In those brief moments where Joker beat Jason, Jason saw the very truth of Joker's soul. He saw that the madness was the mask. That this disgusting, sociopathic monster had so ingrained his identity as a madmen in the hearts and souls of others, becoming the darkest form of fear, that he tricked himself into believing it was true.
The Joker is the darkness that Batman could become. Bruce has the means to eliminate his identity, fake his own death, and truly decsend into the "Batman" persona. He has walked the edge of this identity crisis many times and it has always been one of the many issue his character faces over time. When the line is blurred.
Joker has crossed the line and is never coming back. Back deep in the very maelstrom that is the Joker's mentality, in the very center of all the chaos, lies the sanity and clarity of the man he was, the man he has always been. A man who sees the chaos and accepts it has his weapon. Because this man is evil. This man, this core of who Joker is, his TRUE identity is that of a man who really does enjoy hurting others.
Because the crazy thing about the Joker is that he is sane. He is completely sane and knows it. In Alan Moore's "A Killing Joke", in a STUNNING moment of clarity, that man in the eye of the storm shows himself to Batman. He shows Bruce the truth. That its too late for him. That there is no saving him. Because he doesn't want to be saved. And then, without a hitch, he walks back to the center of the maelstrom and the storm rises once more.
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