Hulk Rants: Stop making our monsters sparkly and Twilight-like!

Welcome back to an overdue episode of Hulk Rants! This topic make Hulk want to SMASH! What's up with making monsters all sensitive and all romantic and stuff like that? Hulk wonder what happen to days when monsters were actually scary? Nowadays, they all sensitive and mushy and falling in love. It fine if you do it once in a while, but nowadays, Hulk notice they seem to overdo it. A lot.

They did it to the vampires
They did it to the werewolves
And they recently did it with zombies.
Hulk not even sure giant monsters will be safe from this trend. It only matter of time.

What's with all these monsters being all mushy and sexy and falling in love? Hulk don't understand the trend. What happened to monsters actually being scary? They can be funny sometimes, as with the Hotel Transylvania movie, but how is a vampire, werewolf and a zombie sexy? Hulk don't quite get the point. Hulk understand there need for stories like these, but Hulk think it's becoming more and more overused. They did another Twilight-like movie called Beautiful Creatures, which came out recently. This getting ridiculous.

Do you think these kinds of stories awesome? Or do puny humans think they unnecessary and overused? Tell Hulk here.

86 Comments
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Posted by Ms. Omega

I agree the whole point of monsters and supernatural creatures is they are supposed to scare you not aww let me give you a hug because I feel sorry for you screw that noise give me my monsters back.

Posted by Mannequin

In mythos Vampires were sexy, that was all part of there charm. Sure a man or woman with fangs might be scary, but what exactly are they suppose to look like? And why would hollywood make Godzilla "sexy" or "mushy"? It's not befitting to the character or the franchise, and Godzilla has never been apart of a horror genre...it's made to be more so like Jurassic Park, just thrills and on-edge tension.

Posted by Xanni15

The Twilight Saga are the best vampire movies in recent memory, and their wolves had the greatest transformation I've ever seen.

Have you seen Underworld? They tried to take vamps and wolves seriously, and failed. LOL

Why not mention Hulk being a sympathetic figure recently?

Posted by laflux

@TheHulk said:

Welcome back to an overdue episode of Hulk Rants! This topic make Hulk want to SMASH! What's up with making monsters all sensitive and all romantic and stuff like that? Hulk wonder what happen to days when monsters were actually scary? Nowadays, they all sensitive and mushy and falling in love. It fine if you do it once in a while, but nowadays, Hulk notice they seem to overdo it. A lot.

They did it to the vampires
They did it to the werewolves
And they recently did it with zombies.
Hulk not even sure giant monsters will be safe from this trend. It only matter of time.

What's with all these monsters being all mushy and sexy and falling in love? Hulk don't understand the trend. What happened to monsters actually being scary? They can be funny sometimes, as with the Hotel Transylvania movie, but how is a vampire, werewolf and a zombie sexy? Hulk don't quite get the point. Hulk understand there need for stories like these, but Hulk think it's becoming more and more overused. They did another Twilight-like movie called Beautiful Creatures, which came out recently. This getting ridiculous.

Do you think these kinds of stories awesome? Or do puny humans think they unnecessary and overused? Tell Hulk here.

In all fairness, Shapeshifters and Twilight Vampires are from the same Movie Universe. As for the Zombie film pictured it is meant to be a parody of Twilight to an extent. But I do agree with you to an extent. Mythological creatures meant to scare us are often now being portrayed in a more sympathetic light. However I don't think this is a bad thing for the most part.

Posted by FiMFTW

Hulk obviously didn't see Warm Bodies.

Posted by Agent9149

I don't see what's wrong with having a different take on legends that are older than dirt.

Edited by mrdecepticonleader

I agree.

@Xanni15 said:

The Twilight Saga are the best vampire movies in recent memory, and their wolves had the greatest transformation I've ever seen.

Have you seen Underworld? They tried to take vamps and wolves seriously, and failed. LOL

Why not mention Hulk being a sympathetic figure recently?

You clearly need to see some more vampire and werewolf movies then.

And I thought Twilight was serious its not like its tongue in cheek or anything

And Hulk has always been somewhat of sympathetic figure.

Posted by TheHulk

@FiMFTW said:

Hulk obviously didn't see Warm Bodies.

No. Hulk did not. Is it good?

Posted by TheHulk

@Mannequin said:

In mythos Vampires were sexy, that was all part of there charm. Sure a man or woman with fangs might be scary, but what exactly are they suppose to look like? And why would hollywood make Godzilla "sexy" or "mushy"? It's not befitting to the character or the franchise, and Godzilla has never been apart of a horror genre...it's made to be more so like Jurassic Park, just thrills and on-edge tension.

That Giant monster part was just a joke of how far they could take it.

Hulk don't think they'd make them sexy, Hulk think it'd be like having Godzilla as like a pet. Like "Marley & Me". Except with Godzilla instead of the dog.

Posted by FiMFTW

@TheHulk said:

@FiMFTW said:

Hulk obviously didn't see Warm Bodies.

No. Hulk did not. Is it good?

You said "They did it with zombies" when what they really did was parody and insult it with zombies.

It's nothing like what you think it is, and it's certainly a zombie movie at heart.

Posted by TheHulk

@FiMFTW said:

@TheHulk said:

@FiMFTW said:

Hulk obviously didn't see Warm Bodies.

No. Hulk did not. Is it good?

You said "They did it with zombies" when what they really did was parody and insult it with zombies.

It's nothing like what you think it is, and it's certainly a zombie movie at heart.

Oh. then Hulk so relieved. Maybe Hulk will give it a chance.

Posted by Xanni15

@mrdecepticonleader said:

@Xanni15 said:

The Twilight Saga are the best vampire movies in recent memory, and their wolves had the greatest transformation I've ever seen.

Have you seen Underworld? They tried to take vamps and wolves seriously, and failed. LOL

Why not mention Hulk being a sympathetic figure recently?

You clearly need to see some more vampire and werewolf movies then.

And I thought Twilight was serious its not like its tongue in cheek or anything

And Hulk has always been somewhat of sympathetic figure.

I apologize that my opinion has irked you. Which movie would you like me to support? And would you like to provide another wolf transformation that was better? :]

Did you see all of the films? Just because it wasn't a parody doesn't mean it was doom and gloom.

Yet the OP neglected to mention that in recent movies there's been more of a shift towards that. Bruce and Betty's love story dominates both of them.

Posted by YourNeighborhoodComicGeek

Me : Finally! Twilight has ended. Now we don't have to rage and rant all the time anymore! The world is now at peace....

This comes on TV

Me : ARE YOU KIDDING ME IOADAOIDNAIOCJNPIAOSNCPIOAN[C RIGHT AFTER TWILIGHT ENDED!!!!!!!

Posted by mrdecepticonleader

@Xanni15 said:

@mrdecepticonleader said:

@Xanni15 said:

The Twilight Saga are the best vampire movies in recent memory, and their wolves had the greatest transformation I've ever seen.

Have you seen Underworld? They tried to take vamps and wolves seriously, and failed. LOL

Why not mention Hulk being a sympathetic figure recently?

You clearly need to see some more vampire and werewolf movies then.

And I thought Twilight was serious its not like its tongue in cheek or anything

And Hulk has always been somewhat of sympathetic figure.

I apologize that my opinion has irked you. Which movie would you like me to support? And would you like to provide another wolf transformation that was better? :]

Did you see all of the films? Just because it wasn't a parody doesn't mean it was doom and gloom.

Yet the OP neglected to mention that in recent movies there's been more of a shift towards that. Bruce and Betty's love story dominates both of them.

Um Bram Stokers Dracula Near Dark An American Werewolf in London

Here is a list actually

http://www.imdb.com/list/F1w6m2-kN9k/

There are better vampire films out there than Twilight

Remember when Werewolf's used to be scary?

Doom and gloom is one thing I was talking about been taken in a serious context.Not a comedic one.

Does it in Avengers? I don't think it does.

Edited by FalconPuuunch

@Xanni15 said:

The Twilight Saga are the best vampire movies in recent memory, and their wolves had the greatest transformation I've ever seen.

Have you seen Underworld? They tried to take vamps and wolves seriously, and failed. LOL

Why not mention Hulk being a sympathetic figure recently?

I know we have had disagreements or whatever but I can't help but comment on this.

Have you seen Van Helsing? That werewolf transformation is the most magnificent thing I have ever seen.

EDIT

Also Being Human (US) is the only good Werewolf/Vampire mix that I have seen and thoroughly liked.

Posted by Rumble Man

I would never call twilight vamps

never

---

yet its just how Hollywood milks the cash cow nowadays, cuz adolescent girls are a big market

Posted by Xanni15

@mrdecepticonleader said:

Um Bram Stokers Dracula Near Dark An American Werewolf in London

Here is a list actually

http://www.imdb.com/list/F1w6m2-kN9k/

There are better vampire films out there than Twilight

Remember when Werewolf's used to be scary?

Doom and gloom is one thing I was talking about been taken in a serious context.Not a comedic one.

Does it in Avengers? I don't think it does.

Bram Strokers Dracula has to be one of most boring films I've ever seen, and if that is the pinnacle, Twilight easily surpasses it.

My opinion differs from that list, but I still don't see how you're claiming those are better. ROFL@ Daybreakers being on that list, that movie was hot garbage.

No, I don't think werewolves have ever been scary, nor have vampires.

I go to movies to be entertained.

If you want to use a team up movie to disprove my claim, go ahead.

Posted by Xanni15

@FalconPuuunch said:

I know we have had disagreements or whatever but I can't help but comment on this.

Have you seen Van Helsing? That werewolf transformation is the most magnificent thing I have ever seen.

EDIT

Also Being Human (US) is the only good Werewolf/Vampire mix that I have seen and thoroughly liked.

Why do you put it like that? I don't hold grudges, we're just discussing things on this site. lol

Damn, you're right. I forgot about Van Helsing, a serious miscalculation on part. Hmm, 1A and 1B in my opinion, especially considering Twilight shows off more and isn't as dark.

I've heard good things about that show from god-spawn but never checked it out.

Posted by mrdecepticonleader

@Xanni15 said:

@mrdecepticonleader said:

Um Bram Stokers Dracula Near Dark An American Werewolf in London

Here is a list actually

http://www.imdb.com/list/F1w6m2-kN9k/

There are better vampire films out there than Twilight

Remember when Werewolf's used to be scary?

Doom and gloom is one thing I was talking about been taken in a serious context.Not a comedic one.

Does it in Avengers? I don't think it does.

Bram Strokers Dracula has to be one of most boring films I've ever seen, and if that is the pinnacle, Twilight easily surpasses it.

My opinion differs from that list, but I still don't see how you're claiming those are better. ROFL@ Daybreakers being on that list, that movie was hot garbage.

No, I don't think werewolves have ever been scary, nor have vampires.

I go to movies to be entertained.

If you want to use a team up movie to disprove my claim, go ahead.

lol that is your opinion fair enough.

I don't really need to disprove your claim since its your opinion.

Those transformations are better anyways.

Edited by Xanni15

@mrdecepticonleader said:

lol that is your opinion fair enough.

I don't really need to disprove your claim since its your opinion.

Those transformations are better anyways.

Well, yeah.

Obviously, but linking a list where the author sandbags Twilight isn't exactly being impartial. lol

In your opinion.

Posted by FalconPuuunch

@Xanni15 said:

@FalconPuuunch said:

I know we have had disagreements or whatever but I can't help but comment on this.

Have you seen Van Helsing? That werewolf transformation is the most magnificent thing I have ever seen.

EDIT

Also Being Human (US) is the only good Werewolf/Vampire mix that I have seen and thoroughly liked.

Why do you put it like that? I don't hold grudges, we're just discussing things on this site. lol

Damn, you're right. I forgot about Van Helsing, a serious miscalculation on part. Hmm, 1A and 1B in my opinion, especially considering Twilight shows off more and isn't as dark.

I've heard good things about that show from god-spawn but never checked it out.

I put it like that because some people can hold small grudges. I know I can sometimes haha Sorry if that reply sounded wrong.

I don't really care for Twilight, but I can't say the series sucks because I have only watched the last film. I will admit that the fight scene at he end was done really nicely though.

I love it and now I guess I have to find this God-Spawn guy and follow him. lol

Posted by _Zombie_

I'll take 'sparkly' zombies over the same zombie movie that's been done a thousand times over.

Posted by mrdecepticonleader

@Xanni15 said:

@mrdecepticonleader said:

lol that is your opinion fair enough.

I don't really need to disprove your claim since its your opinion.

Those transformations are better anyways.

Well, yeah.

Obviously, but linking a list where the author sandbags Twilight isn't exactly being impartial. lol

In your opinion.

lol well it deserves all the criticism it gets :P

Show me a better transformation then.

Posted by Mercy_

I thought Warm Bodies was comedy/satire?

Moderator
Posted by Xanni15

@FalconPuuunch said:

I put it like that because some people can hold small grudges. I know I can sometimes haha Sorry if that reply sounded wrong.

I don't really care for Twilight, but I can't say the series sucks because I have only watched the last film. I will admit that the fight scene at he end was done really nicely though.

I love it and now I guess I have to find this God-Spawn guy and follow him. lol

It's cool. :]

That's all I ever ask for regarding those who dislike or don't care for Twilight, just be open about it. I know it's not for everyone.

He's got the biggest ego around here, shouldn't be hard to find. lol

Posted by The Stegman
Different strokes for different folks.
Online
Posted by guttridgeb

I want a film with the original vampires of legend more akin to zombies.

Posted by Xanni15

@mrdecepticonleader said:

lol well it deserves all the criticism it gets :P

Show me a better transformation then.

I've not heard a single valid one. :P

Sure, not to mention they look better:

Posted by 8bitGangsta

@The Stegman said:

Different strokes for different folks.

lmfao

Posted by TotalBalance

@Xanni15 said:

@mrdecepticonleader said:

lol well it deserves all the criticism it gets :P

Show me a better transformation then.

I've not heard a single valid one. :P

Sure, not to mention they look better:

I never really looked into twilight much, but would anyone care to explain why all the guys just happen to be shirtless, is there a plot reason for it?

Posted by sesquipedalophobe

@guttridgeb said:

I want a film with the original vampires of legend more akin to zombies.

Watch Strigoi.

Posted by mrdecepticonleader

@Xanni15 said:

@mrdecepticonleader said:

lol well it deserves all the criticism it gets :P

Show me a better transformation then.

I've not heard a single valid one. :P

Sure, not to mention they look better:

Well I have.

Really? Where is the pain and the showing of him actually transforming? Not to mention its all done in CGI which too many movie rely on these days.Those other transformations are much better,I also disagree they just look like generic wolves.

@TotalBalance: Twilight has no plot :)

Posted by Xanni15

@TotalBalance:

It's explained (in the books) that they have abnormally high body temperatures due to being shape shifters. Plus a few of the characters mention that when they transform their clothes are destroyed so they try to wear as few as possible since they're a simpler and more modest people.

Posted by Xanni15

@mrdecepticonleader said:

Really? Where is the pain and the showing of him actually transforming? Not to mention its all done in CGI which too many movie rely on these days.Those other transformations are much better,I also disagree they just look like generic wolves.

@TotalBalance: Twilight has no plot :)

Who says it needs to be? You asked for a better transformation, never mentioning all of these restrictions. Keep living in the past if you want. :]

Spoken like a true hater, not to mention that's not at all what he asked. lol

Posted by TotalBalance

@Xanni15 said:

@TotalBalance:

It's explained (in the books) that they have abnormally high body temperatures due to being shape shifters. Plus a few of the characters mention that when they transform their clothes are destroyed so they try to wear as few as possible since they're a simpler and more modest people.

Sounds like a half-a**ed explanation just to get some attractive looking guys shirtless on screen.

Posted by mrdecepticonleader

@Xanni15 said:

@mrdecepticonleader said:

Really? Where is the pain and the showing of him actually transforming? Not to mention its all done in CGI which too many movie rely on these days.Those other transformations are much better,I also disagree they just look like generic wolves.

@TotalBalance: Twilight has no plot :)

Who says it needs to be? You asked for a better transformation, never mentioning all of these restrictions. Keep living in the past if you want. :]

Spoken like a true hater, not to mention that's not at all what he asked. lol

Well its not a better transformation.I mean there was no transformation more of just a quick change.I am not living in the past all I said was that they use CGI too much for films.I can understand its uses but its a shame practical effects in films seem like a dying art.

Its not that I am a hater I just cant find any grounds to like it as all.

Posted by Xanni15

@TotalBalance said:

@Xanni15 said:

@TotalBalance:

It's explained (in the books) that they have abnormally high body temperatures due to being shape shifters. Plus a few of the characters mention that when they transform their clothes are destroyed so they try to wear as few as possible since they're a simpler and more modest people.

Sounds like a half-a**ed explanation just to get some attractive looking guys shirtless on screen.

No different than any other movie.

Posted by Xanni15

@mrdecepticonleader said:

Well its not a better transformation.I mean there was no transformation more of just a quick change.I am not living in the past all I said was that they use CGI too much for films.I can understand its uses but its a shame practical effects in films seem like a dying art.

Its not that I am a hater I just cant find any grounds to like it as all.

It's all opinions, we just have different ones. :]

Fair enough, but no reason to make such a claim as the movie has no plot when that's not what the other poster asked for.

Posted by mrdecepticonleader

@Xanni15 said:

@mrdecepticonleader said:

Well its not a better transformation.I mean there was no transformation more of just a quick change.I am not living in the past all I said was that they use CGI too much for films.I can understand its uses but its a shame practical effects in films seem like a dying art.

Its not that I am a hater I just cant find any grounds to like it as all.

It's all opinions, we just have different ones. :]

Fair enough, but no reason to make such a claim as the movie has no plot when that's not what the other poster asked for.

Fair enough.

Posted by Xanni15

@Rumble Man said:

I would never call twilight vamps

never

---

yet its just how Hollywood milks the cash cow nowadays, cuz adolescent girls are a big market

Why not, cause they sparkle and don't go poof in the sun? It was just a different take.

Edited by Rumble Man

@Xanni15:

Vamps don't go poof in the sun dude/chick its a 'movie' thing that started with Nosferatu in the 42', heck the stoker literature had them crazier with wolf transformation, mist form and even elemental moon dust (cool space stuff with prettier sparkle)

Meyer's vampires are just like a vegetarian beef patty. Got the substance, but got no soul.

EDIT: I like Underworld because of their interesting concepts of vamp/wolf warfare

Posted by Xanni15

@Rumble Man said:

@Xanni15:

Vamps don't go poof in the sun dude/chick its a 'movie' thing that started with Nosferatu in the 42', heck the stoker literature had them crazier with wolf transformation, mist form and even elemental moon dust (cool space stuff with prettier sparkle)

Meyer's vampires are just like a vegetarian beef patty. Got the substance, but got no soul.

EDIT: I like Underworld because of their interesting concepts of vamp/wolf warfare

Okay, brah, I was just asking since that's the man complaint I see from people in regards to the Twilight Saga.

Considering who it was written by, I think she did alright.

Underworld is too inconsistent for me, and their wolves look so bad.

Edited by Rumble Man

@Xanni15:

Well unless you are into furry (whatevs make people happy) they are supposed to be werewolves, predators and thus they serve the utilitarian function to hunt and eat. Not impress. The story is pretty linear and easy to follow.

I have had my share of vamp literature, vidya games and even animu/mango. With prettier vamps who are still more badass ( can reccomend if you want)

My beef with Twilight is the cesspool of mary suedom that is Bella 'f*cking' Swan

EDIT:

as for romance vamps they have Ruthven, for moody vampire (this one is awesome though) they had varney, and as hot lesbian vampire they had Carmilla - all which predate Dracula

Posted by Xanni15

@Rumble Man:

Meyer's wolves hunt with the best of them, certainly more efficient than those in Underworld but I get what you're saying.

Oh, I understand the beef with Bella, and I agree, it's the same beef I have with Harry Potter.

I just want to be entertained, I don't get in-depth about all of these creatures.lol

Posted by Rumble Man

@Xanni15:

Then again they live in relative peace with the pact they have with the sparklers, contrast underworld where it is urban guerrilla war and trenchcoats every-night. In sparkler-verse changelings are just something on the side, even the big sparkler leaders (volturi) are cast aside, for some dumb B*tch and one poor sparkler that has become victim.

shark teeth, fast, does not ask 'date' for blood - sucks it anyways.

I am one of those dudes who like horror flicks because I like creepy crawlies, call it escapism or power fantasy. Its just whenever I saw a vamp/human relation its just like a man who fell in-love with his thanksgiving turkey. Although some interspecies romances are better than others.

Posted by Xanni15

@Rumble Man: Because the Twilight vamps aren't a danger to humans, in fact they actually protect them. I agree that the Volturi should have had a bigger role.

Eh, 30 Days of Night just didn't do it for me either, not smart enough vamps. They should have easily been able to wipe that town completely out.

I got ya, nothing wrong with that, wanting them to embrace themselves.

Posted by Rumble Man

@Xanni15: well I like my vamps murderous (just a preference tho)

still one of my faves of all time, like the sparklers they bit cows too but the cows turn into vamps. And they are friendly.

Just saying there are many vamps out there as there are many bugs in the jungle, broaden yer horizons and find the right one.

Posted by Xanni15

@Rumble Man:

Oh, I'm fan of other vamps and movies, I just really like the Twilight universe. There's just so many out there that I think it dilutes the genre.

Posted by VercingetorixTheGreat

@Mannequin said:

In mythos Vampires were sexy, that was all part of there charm. Sure a man or woman with fangs might be scary, but what exactly are they suppose to look like? And why would hollywood make Godzilla "sexy" or "mushy"? It's not befitting to the character or the franchise, and Godzilla has never been apart of a horror genre...it's made to be more so like Jurassic Park, just thrills and on-edge tension.

Yes they are supposed to look attractive but underneath they were as evil as the devil. I have read Dracula,These things can't be reasoned with or feel any emotion besides hate.

Posted by Rumble Man

@Xanni15:

The funny thing about vampires is that they exist in every culture in the world, what people see in popular culture are just derivatives. Take the strigoi or varcolac from romania which are vamp/werewolf that eats suns, leak from southeast asia which exists as a head with organs, take the loups garou which is a vamp/warlock/wolf with a fear of frogs or even the one that says dead wolves became vamps.

There are no 'definite' vampire myths, but in pop culture there is a criterion based on tradition.

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