A Moment of Your Time and Understanding.

  Hello my name is Brett and this is not a joke. I suffer from a case of Paranoid and Aggressive Schizophrenia. In simple terms I hear voices in my head that either make me really scared or incredible angry. Now I want it clear I never heard words like “Kill yourself” or “Worship Satan” it was more like a jumble of mixed up random incomplete sentences. My illness began back in 1989, my freshman year in college, when all the stress in my life caught up with me and I had my first mental breakdown. As I began down a spiral of insanity I honestly believed that every one else heard these words but would refuse to admit it. I began skipping classes and turned against my closest friends. Eventually after falling grades and the concern of my friends I was hospitalized and later diagnosed.

 

Please don’t get the idea that I am dangerous or should be locked away, for after years of group therapy and regulated prescriptions I know longer Hear voices. Well that’s not completely true. I have heard on occasion word here and there but for the most part my they’re gone. However I still have some mental problems. For the most part I suffer what could best be described as mentally one step behind everyone else. At times of stress I lack confidence, and have waves of uncontrolled emotions. But for the most part I simply can not concentrate.

Now you’re probably wondering why I am telling you what is my darkest, and most embarrassing secret and why it is on the RPG board. Well because of my illness I do not work thus I spend most of my time at home. When I discovered the Comic Vine I found a better way to spend my time other than watching my top notch collection of DVD’s. But it was not until I found the world of RPG that I truly found an outlet of my creative side. I desperately want to be part of this world and maybe some day become a productive member but unfortunately my illness hinders me from writing at times. There are days when my lack of both concentration and confidence hit me so hard all I can do is take a tranquillizer and go to sleep.  

I presently have four accounts on Comic Vine, the referee, Dr_Columbo, JamesWest007, and Scary_Harry. Though them I wish to enter the world of imagination but again there are days when I simple can not type or even concentrate enough to read others posts. So I tell you all this in the hopes that if we ever meet on the battlefield you will understand if I disappear for days or hold up posting. This fact troubles me deeply though, for in my head I feel like I’m letting down other players and it simply leads to more stress. It is an endless loop that only ends with me shutting down my computer and giving up. So I ask for your understanding and patiences during these times.

So now you know the cross I bear and the life I lead. It doesn’t sound pleasant but I do live 99% of my life with a smile on my face and a song in my heart. I even take Improve classes to build my confidence and between you and me I am very good at it. It just when stressed I have trouble and now a days it seems stress is everywhere. But I am a positive person and I do believe in a higher power so I know things will always get better.

One last thing before I go. If we do role play don’t expect anything great. I am not a writer nor do I ever plan to be. But I do consider myself creative and willing to learn. In the future I even hope to play Team games which right now is a pipe dream due to my fear of holding them up. But as long as there is no problem waiting between posts I’ll be OK.  Well I’ve said everything I wanted to and it is now up to you. I hope you understand the awkwardness I have placed myself in by telling you my situation but it should also show my dedication to becoming a more active player. I thank you for your time and your understanding.

Sincerely The Referee (a humble citizen of Vine City)

33 Comments

Dog the Bounty Hunter, Comics?

Dose any body out there agree to the statement that Dog the Bounty Hunter deserves his own comic? Dog is already a role model to kids and has an origin suited perfectly for a book.  He upholds the strong moral values of a Christian with the ruthlessness of a Hunter. Many other television icons have graced the pages, why not the Dawg? He has side kicks, weapons, and a purpose all which meets the standards so why not? I'm sure the stories would be a little off set in fiction still his exploits, in my opinion, would sell off the rack. I could rant on more but I am more interested in other opinions.
12 Comments

Does Batman Need a Sidekick?

GOODBYE ROBIN
Batman, more that anybody, is synonymous with sidekicks. Robins are legendary. But does Batman need them?  In my opinion they have always been there to watch his back. Batman has proven time and again he needs no back up so therefore sidekicks are a distraction. He can't always protect them and after the death of Jason, he should see the futility of keeping them around. As a huge Batman fan I see him as the perfection of man. A icon that needs back up. If he ever did I'm sure all readers would agree his prep and gadgets would be all the assistance he needs.Yet he constantly brings in new recruits. Why is that? 
10 Comments

Deadman should not be alive

Is any one else outraged that Deadman is alive? Deadman was a character unlike any other. He was never the typical fight the bad guy save the world and get the girl kind of hero and now that is no more. I have not read Brightest Day (waiting for the Hard Back) but I understand he gets a power ring. DC has turned him into just another super powered hero. DC has plenty of them. But a ghost who steals moments of life was unique. That man is no more. Deadman has never been one of DC front runners and I am afraid this may be their opportunity to change him forever. If it ain't broke don't fix it. Boston Brand's character was perfect just the way he was and now that has been ruined!
5 Comments

I Feel Like an Idiot

I haven't bought a comic book in close to ten years! I collected comics form 1980 to 2000 and had to quit because I couldn't afford it any more. I had two choices quit cold turkey or give up some of my favorites. An act I couldn't do. How could I collect Batman and give up Hulk? So when I joined Comic Vine a  month ago I knew I was out of my element. I just learned Wolverines been cloned, Dick is now batman, Nightcrawler is dead, and Emma Frosts power has nothing to do with cold. Now when I joined Comic Vine I did all the usuals, silly postes about costumes and sidekicks hoping to get lucky. I have one that I thought would do good called Create a story 5 lines at a time on Fan-Fic,The Idea is not original but the story being created is. But i digress. I want to be a productive member of Comic Vine but I just don't have the knowledge. The only comics I buy are either Essentials or Showcases. To aide me in my quest I shall now buy more hard backs or graphic novels. I recently bought Blackest Night and I have plans to buy more. Please inform me about other DC / Marvel Universal shaking  stories I should pick up. Anyway after all this If you meet me on a Vine please give me a chance and forgive me of my ignorance , because as I said "I feel like an idiot"
The Referee

16 Comments