Stan Lee's cameos, in my opinion are illustrating an old man's love for the characters of the film. There hasn't been a single appearance of his that has warranted outrage or indignation from fans and non-fans alike. It's not like he was among the crowd of New Yorkers in the first Spider-man movie who started pelting Osborn with crap in the middle of a fight scene....
So far his biggest and most important cameo has been in the Incredible Hulk - a role that could have been played by any actor or extra, so why not put him in there?
Do I think cameos are too distracting? Nope. I loved Bruce Campbell's appearances in the Spider-man movies, I thought it was only fitting that Lou Ferrigno appear in some form for both Hulk movies and had to smile when Bill Bixby flashed on the tv for a moment.
With Nick Fury, I don't see it as a cameo. The Marvel movies are being made into on-screen comic books with its own established universe. This is a supporting character in the universe, fulfilling his role from the comics. Even though Samuel L Jackson just plays himself.... just like Robert Downey Jr....
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