Lessons I learned from 90's saturday morning cartoons

1. (from Eek the cat) If you are nice, polite and self sacrificing you will be severely punished for it 
2.(from spiderman) Vampires drink plasma through suction cups on their hands and for some reason insidious is a more acceptable term than sinister  
3. (from Xmen) its perfectly OK to leave a naive 15 year old girl alone with a mass murderer as long as you think he's refomed 
4. (from Batman TAS) You can't copyright fish 
5.(also from Batman TAS) There are very few problems that can't be solved by a vicious beating 
6. (from Avengers United They Stand) this show was a bad idea 
7. (from Silver Surfer) Thanos is kind of a creepy guy 
8. (from Samurai Pizza Cats) working at pizza hut will never be this awesome  
9. (from Ren and Stimpy) sometimes you don't need to understand whats going on 
10.(from Animaniacs) TRIP TO TAHITI  
 
I'm sorry to the younger crowd who won't get the humor here   

52 Comments
52 Comments
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Posted by Death Certificate
@joshmightbe:
You could haved added that From the spider-man, new york replaced the guns for lasers.
Posted by Jake Fury

From Bravestarr: If you do a drug similar to LSD you die.
Posted by joshmightbe
@Jake Fury: also from Bravestar Horses are really good with bazookas
Posted by MKF30

Yeah, I miss those days. One thing I've learned is that the great american cartoons of the late 80's and 90's are far better then the shows out today. Outside of a few shows here and there, it's just not the same.

Posted by thehummingbird

I learned from Batman the animated series....Joker does not want to rev up his harley....=( 

Edited by Death Certificate

I learn from batman that you don't have to be evil to pull off an evil laugh.
Posted by castleking

cars are more than meets the eye and not all machines want to conquer and enslave you..... transformers.

Posted by InnerVenom123

If you say Candlejack, you'll disappear. It's funny, I just said it out loud while typing tha--

Posted by joshmightbe
@Death Certificate: I loved the episode where batman was laughing at Harley while she had him hanging over a shark tank, I completely understood why it freaked her out
Posted by texasdeathmatch
@joshmightbe: amazing
Edited by castleking

I learned that if you dress in black wear a mask and take vigilante violence on scum in the pursuit of justice that the police and the commissioner will work with you.

Posted by joshmightbe
@castleking: only as long as Batman is cool with it too
Posted by texasdeathmatch

Also, Gotham Police, WORST COPS EVER

Posted by Death Certificate
@joshmightbe:
I know , and the funny thing is that in batman beyond return of the joker, terry almost pulls the laugh while fighting with joker.
Posted by joshmightbe
@texasdeathmatch: No the NYPD from the old ninja turtles cartoon were way worse did you ever even see those guys in that series
Posted by castleking

you can leave some one hogtied with a note and evidence around him in front of a police precinct and the police and judge will incarcerate him with that evidence at least until they escape

Posted by Lance Uppercut

If you dress up in a tuxedo and throw roses at bad guys, teenage girls will swoon over you - Sailor Moon 

Posted by riri4life

LOL...I miss one saturday morning! :'(

Posted by thegreatfour

I learned from that old spider man show that it's very easy to turn non-stick frying pans into giant evil mech suits

Posted by texasdeathmatch
@joshmightbe said:
" @texasdeathmatch: No the NYPD from the old ninja turtles cartoon were way worse did you ever even see those guys in that series "
Haha true, they were never around. You'd think if these giant drill vehicles kept bursting out of the ground, they'd be more concerned.
Posted by Death Certificate
@Lance Uppercut said:
"If you dress up in a tuxedo and throw roses at bad guys, teenage girls will swoon over you - Sailor Moon  "

ROFL at tuxedo mask
Posted by Full_Spectrum

I learned from loony tunes that you should never, under any circumstances, strap a rocket to your back while on rollerskates. 
Also, a bucket of black paint lets you teleport.

Posted by castleking

there are mutagenic creatures underground living in the sewers

Posted by thehummingbird

That I could secretly be a princess from the moon and have the ability to turn into a sailor warrior and have a talking pet cat and look super hot while doing it...=P That would be my dream....

Posted by Dracade102

Never trust clowns, or Goblins, or Ninjas, Green guys with magical rings, or People who rule Latveria. 
And never count on the army / police to shoot the bad guy.

Posted by castleking

glasses and a hairstyle is really all the disguise you need

Posted by Full_Spectrum

the inside of a beaver's dam is way cooler than the outside.

Posted by Lance Uppercut
@Death Certificate said:
" @Lance Uppercut said:
"If you dress up in a tuxedo and throw roses at bad guys, teenage girls will swoon over you - Sailor Moon  "
ROFL at tuxedo mask "
Hell yeah, son.
Edited by thehummingbird
@Death Certificate said:

" @Lance Uppercut said:

"If you dress up in a tuxedo and throw roses at bad guys, teenage girls will swoon over you - Sailor Moon  "
ROFL at tuxedo mask "
 
 
Oh I would be swooning....;D I had the biggest crush on Tuxedo mask...-cough still does cough- that was weird where did that come from? ;D
Posted by Death Certificate

 Stone gargoyles  from church  come alive at night.

Posted by castleking

you can seduce and drive your prison psychiatrist wild if you got "Mad" game

Posted by thehummingbird

That when you are ten you can leave your home to go on a magical adventure with a pokemon and adventure with people way older than you of the opposite gender who are perverts without worrying about anything. When you are continually attacked by a a shady group it is better to fight them head on than call the police...>.> 

Posted by thehummingbird
@castleking:  
 
Harley? =P 
Edited by castleking
hummingbird...     :P 
 
  
  
 
if you plead insanity you dont get the chair or any death sentence but get put in a low security medical ward regardless of your crime and the danger you represent even if you have block or city leveling power.
Posted by Edamame
@joshmightbe said:
3. (from Xmen) its perfectly OK to leave a naive 15 year old girl alone with a mass murderer as long as you think he's refomed
Are you referring to Jubilee and Sabretooth? LOL
Posted by thehummingbird
@castleking:  
 
I so wanna be Harley....>.>
Posted by Lance Uppercut
@thehummingbird said:
" @Death Certificate said:

" @Lance Uppercut said:

"If you dress up in a tuxedo and throw roses at bad guys, teenage girls will swoon over you - Sailor Moon  "
ROFL at tuxedo mask "
  Oh I would be swooning....;D I had the biggest crush on Tuxedo mask...-cough still does cough- that was weird where did that come from? ;D "
It's the top hat. Women love top hats. Abe Lincoln is a great example. 
Edited by castleking
@thehummingbird said:

" @castleking:   I so wanna be Harley....>.> "


 
i be happy as Gambit  to keep you company...  >_>
 
"i like solitaire, okay............ 'less i got someone to play with"....(lustful eyes)
 
"you can drain my energy anytime, Chere.........Gambit got plenty".
  
 
i learned all my best pick up lines from Gambit
 
  
Edited by thehummingbird
@Lance Uppercut:  
 
 
hmmm...that and he was overall an amazingly romantic and his corny sayings before he kicked bad guy ass such as,  " 

Shame on you, Mistrust. 


Your lies and deceits have finally caught up with you.
Calling an innocent girl a cheater, and turning friends against each other."

 
  
 
-swoons- He is so amazing.....;_; EVen better  "  

"You use sweets to make decay, 

when really they're meant to make people happy.
You tainted all of their sweet moments instead,
didn't you?"

Posted by thehummingbird
@castleking:  
 
Haha x) We can be weirdos together...you can be a pick up artist and me a door mat...
Posted by Lance Uppercut

Even better - the way to a womans heart is by monologuing to the villains 

Posted by castleking

i learned that soap operas dont got nothing on Wolverine's love life.

Posted by joshmightbe
@castleking: I f a woman dates wolverine she might as well put a murder me sign on her back
Posted by thehummingbird
@Lance Uppercut:  
 
you have no idea how true that is...>.>
Edited by castleking

plus the occasional slapping and putting her down or at the very least pushing her away.
 
It is okay to be different and be emo about it and that racism is rampant . (x-men)

Posted by ssejllenrad

I miss the nineties. I didn't know we could learn a lot from them shows. But now I know. And knowing is half the battle! :D
 
...Yeah I'm so 80's... :D

Posted by velle37

Heart of the cards........... 
 
Guide me.......
Posted by TheCerealKillz

From Powerpufgirls: DONT MISJUDGE THE POWER OF A FEMALE. THEY WILL KICK YOUR ASS. 
 
From dexter: get a monkey 

Posted by velle37
@thehummingbird said:
" @castleking:   I so wanna be Harley....>.> "

Harley is so, so, so, so, so awesome.........
Posted by joshmightbe

also 
From Swat Cats: a motorcycle launched out of a jet will land perfectly and nothing bad will come of it 
From Gargoyles: New York City is a great place to hang glide and people rarely look up even if a large monster is swooping a couple of feet above their heads 

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