Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces #4 - (Script)

PREVIOUSLY: Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces #3 - (Script)

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"Abandon All Hope" - Rated T+

Page 1

1/ Isaac’s neighbor’s brother, eviscerated by the tree monster.

2/ Isaac looking on with the black binoculars.

CAPTION: ISAAC: I was there.
CAPTION: ISAAC: I didn’t say anything. I didn’t shout for help.

3/ Ghost Rider incinerating the tree monster.

CAPTION: ISAAC: Because I was too scared. All my life, the majority of what I’ve felt has been fear.
CAPTION: ISAAC: Anxiety.

4/ Isaac running down the trail and away.

CAPTION: ISAAC: It was our town’s tradition. The nervous settlers.
CAPTION: ISAAC: I can’t imagine why no one ever questioned it. How we can live like this.

5/ Black. The Operator Symbol.

CAPTION: ISAAC: I can’t take much more.
CAPTION: ISAAC: I feel words coming out of my mouth, I see what’s happening. But nothing to do but feel fear.

Page 2

1/ Ghost Rider standing to face Slenderman.

GHOST RIDER: You’re like the other one… my fire can’t--

2/ Slenderman’s fist knocking down Ghost Rider.

SFX: WHAM

3/ Isaac’s face.

CAPTION: ISAAC: Please Ghost Rider. Please kill it.

Page 3

1/ Ghost Rider throwing his open palm out, molten chains lashing out.

2/ Slenderman looking at the oncoming chains.

SLENDERMAN: (X)

3/ Slenderman is gone, the chains hit nothing.

4/ Slenderman behind Ghost Rider.

GHOST RIDER: Fire didn’t kill the clawed freak, I had to-

5/ Ghost Rider turning to see Slenderman.

GHOST RIDER: SH--

Page 4

1/ Ghost Rider tossed into the air by multiple tendrils.

GHOST RIDER: F**K!!

2/ Slenderman, multiple black tendrils slithering out from his shoulders and back.

3/ Flashback to Ghost Rider walking away from the burning Plague Doctor.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: Why did it work on HIM then? If what I’m thinking is true, then WHY is he dead?

4/ The Archangel looking over his shoulder, standing in front of the pond.

THE ARCHANGEL: Come to greet your God?

Page 5

1/ Splash Page/ A badly burned Plague Doctor, standing opposite The Archangel. His clothing is scorched, but still covering most of him, and there’s something reddish black with a hint of pus-yellow dripping out of the holes. All that remains intact is his mask, which is charred. His scythe is tangled up in the rags, dragging along.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: Yes… to see my work….

Page 6

1/ Ghost Rider aiming both of his hands down as he falls.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: If this flakes, it’ll be my last option.

2/ Slenderman looking up at Ghost Rider falling toward him.

SLENDERMAN: (X)

3/ Ghost Rider spraying a massive amount of fire out of his hands and mouth down at Slenderman.

SFX: FRRRWWWWOOOOOOOMMMM

4/ Isaac watches the blaze.

ISAAC: NOBURNHURT
ISAAC: WILLNOTHURT

Page 7

1/ Ghost Rider on one knee in front of Slenderman.

GHOST RIDER: … s’what I thought.

2/ Slenderman walking toward Ghost Rider.

ISAAC: GIVEUP

3/ Ghost Rider looking down at the ground.

ISAAC: HOPELOST

4/ Ghost Rider pressing his hand onto the ground.

ISAAC: YOUROPERATORWILLCONNECTYOUSHORTLY

5/ The impression of Ghost Rider’s hand glows burning orange.

SFX: SSSSSSSSS
CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: The only way to get him in is to surprise him.

Page 8

1/ Slenderman standing right in front of Ghost Rider. There’s a glow under Ghost Rider.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: Goddammit. I’m scared.
ISAAC: TIMETODIE

2/ Ghost Rider looking up. His hand has made fiery orange cracks in the ground.

GHOST RIDER: I’ll see you in hell.

3/ Slenderman looking down.

SLENDERMAN: (X)!!!!!!!!!!!

4/ Ghost Rider and Slenderman collapse into a burning sinkhole, the innards appear as a vortex of fire. Slenderman is panicking, Ghost Rider is just free falling.

SLENDERMAN: (X)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: But he’s TERRIFIED.
GHOST RIDER: HAHAHAHAAHAHAAA!!!!

Page 9

1/ Ghost Rider and Slenderman are both falling through a bright orange pit, toward a vortex of fire. The pit appears to be a stomach, with stony innards. There are a few lost souls wandering on cliffs that bleed, and there are ponds of stomach acid and rivers of sh*t.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: Escape was impossible the last time I was down there. Took a miracle to get me out.

2/ Slenderman looking down toward the vortex.

SLENDERMAN: (X)!!!!!

3/ Ghost Rider aiming both his arms up toward the visible portal to Earth, which hasn’t closed yet.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: One chance.

4/ Chains fire out of Ghost Rider’s sleeves.

5/ Earth. Chains lash out of the portal with spiked hooks at their ends.

6/ The soil impaled by he hooked chains.

SFX: SCHK

Page 10

1/ Ghost Rider hanging by the chains as Slenderman falls past him.

GHOST RIDER: YES!!
SLENDERMAN: (X)!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2/ Ghost Rider starting to pull himself up by the chains, which have separated from his arms.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: I’M GONNA MAKE IT!

3/ Ghost Rider’s foot, a black tendril wrapped around it.

4/ Ghost Rider looking down.

GHOST RIDER: OH, FOR F**K’S SAKE!

5/ Slenderman hanging on by a tendril from his shoulder, reaching his arms up toward Ghost Rider.

GHOST RIDER: YOU ASSHOLE!!!
GHOST RIDER: YOU—F**KING—ASSHOLE!!!
SLENDERMAN: (X)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Page 12

1/ The portal on Earth, slowly starting to close.

2/ Isaac in the chains.

ISAAC: RIDERWILLRIDERWILLDIEDIED
ISAAC: D….

3/ Ghost Rider kicking his foot violently.

GHOST RIDER: NGH!! HGGRH!!

4/ Isaac’s eyes. The Operator Symbols starting to fade.

CAPTION: LOSING SIGNAL

5/ Ghost Rider looking down past Slenderman, at the vortex.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: I made this portal only to the hellish part of limbo so I could get back to Earth easier.
CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: Stupid me, thinkin’ something would actually work in MY favor.

Page 13

1/ The vortex of hell.

HELL: BLLAAAAZZZEEEEEEE

2/ Ghost Rider looking down.

GHOST RIDER: F**K!

3/ The vortex forms thousands of demonic hands, slithering up toward Slenderman and Ghost Rider.

HELL: WELLLCOOOMMEEE BAAACCCKKKKK

4/ Slenderman looking down at the hands.

SLENDERMAN: (X)!!!!!

5/ Slenderman covered by the hands.

HELL: NEVVVVERR ESSSCAAAAAPE AGAAAAAIIIINNNN

Page 14

1/ Ghost Rider shouting.

GHOST RIDER: NEVER!!!

2/ Ghost Rider’s partially covered by the hands.

GHOST RIDER: EVER!!!!

3/ Ghost Rider covered by the hands.

4/ Ghost Rider bursting out of the hands, covered in a bright fire. A new hellcycle under him, made entirely out of hellfire.

SFX: VRRRRRRMMM
GHOST RIDER: AGAIN!!!!!

Page 15

1/ Ghost Rider riding up from the pit, using the hellfire-hellcycle like a rocket, toward the portal which is just about to close. Slenderman is being dragged down by the hands.

GHOST RIDER: GGGRRRRRAAAAA!!!!
HELL: HSSSSSSSSSSSS
SLENDERMAN: (X)!!!!!!!

2/ Ghost Rider bursting out of the portal with his hellfire-hellcycle.

GHOST RIDER: AAAAA!!!

3/ Ghost Rider in the air looking down at the portal, which has closed.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: Holy f**k.

4/ Ghost Rider in mid-air, the hellcycle bursts into nothingness.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: I did it.

5/ Ghost Rider slamming against the ground.

SFX: WHUMP
GHOST RIDER: HGH

Page 16

1/ Ghost Rider starting to stand, looking toward Isaac.

2/ Isaac’s eyes. The Operator Symbols are gone.

CAPTION: SIGNAL LOST
ISAAC: … I--
ISAAC: I’M FREE!!

3/ Isaac struggling in the chains.

ISAAC: YOU DID IT! I’M FREE!!
ISAAC: Th-thank you!

4/ Ghost Rider snapping his fingers.
SFX: SNAP
GHOST RIDER: Don’t mention it.

5/ The chains on Isaac burst into ashes.

SFX: SHH
ISAAC: Thank you so much.
CAPTION: ISAAC: Today’s events start to sink in.

Page 17

1/ Isaac standing up.

ISAAC: Are you okay?

2/ Ghost Rider.

GHOST RIDER: That thing said it served Cthulhu.
GHOST RIDER: So no. I’m not okay.
CAPTION: ISAAC: Between seeing someone die, becoming a puppet for an internet story…

3/ Isaac looking at the town’s dark green barrier.

ISAAC: THE Cthulhu?
CAPTION: ISAAC: I just want today to end. Because the guilt is too much. The guilt stands out more than anything.

4/ Ghost Rider.

GHOST RIDER: Read much Lovecraft?

Page 18

1/ Isaac looking toward Ghost Rider.

ISAAC: I’ve skimmed a bit.
CAPTION: ISAAC: I never told my next door neighbor how his brother died.
CAPTION: ISAAC: He was killed, thinking his brother was fine. Worried about his brother. Worried and scared.

2/ Isaac and Ghost Rider thrown to the ground by a shattering earthquake.

SFX: RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
CAPTION: ISAAC: That was his last feeling.
CAPTION: ISAAC: And nothing I ever do will make up for that.

3/ Plague Doctor entangled by Cthulhu’s tentacles which are holding him above the center pond.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: YESSSS….
THE ARCHANGEL: THIS IS HIS GRATITUDE, MY DOCTOR!
THE ARCHANGEL: WITNESS GOD’S HATE!
PLAGUE DOCTOR: MY WORK… SUCCESS.

4/ Plague Doctor is yanked into the pond by the tentacles viciously.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: KILL ME, GOD! PLEASE KILL ME!
THE ARCHANGEL: BECOME ONE WITH HIS RAGE!

Page 19

1/ The Archangel standing in front of the pond, on both of his knees, his arms up.

THE ARCHANGEL: THE GREAT CTHULHU NO LONGER LIES IN DARKNESS DREAMING!

2/ Mist spewing out of the pond, surrounding The Archangel.

THE ARCHANGEL: CTHULHU WILL END EVERYTHING!

3/ The Archangel’s gas mask melting from the mist.

THE ARCHANGEL: CTHULHU WILL MAKE EVERYTHING DIE!

4/ Close up on The Archangel.

THE ARCHANGEL: God….
THE ARCHANGEL: God Cthulhu….
THE ARCHANGEL: Eat me.

5/ Same view, The Archangel covered in mist.

SFX: CHRRRKKK

Page 20

1/ Splash Page/ Isaac and Ghost Rider looking toward the forest. A cloud of smoke is rising. A single green tentacle, about 1 mile tall, is slithering toward the sky.

ISAAC: ….
GHOST RIDER: F**k….

NEXT TIME: "CTHULHU"!

--

TO BE CONTINUED: Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces #5 (FINALE) - (Script)

I OWN: ISAAC EBERTH, NIGHTINGALE

I DON'T OWN: CTHULHU, PLAGUE DOCTOR, THE ARCHANGEL, THE RAKE, SLENDERMAN, GHOST RIDER

12 Comments

Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces #3 - (Script)

PREVIOUSLY: Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces #2 - (Script)

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"In Darkness Dreaming" - Rated T+

Page 1

1/ A little girl no older than 7 limping through her neighborhood, looking up at the green sky. She’s sick like the others, bleeding out of her nose and her mouth and her ears.

2/ She looks at the glowing green, which reflects off of her face.

LITTLE GIRL: Why…God….why…

3/ The figure of THE ARCHANGEL standing in front of her. He has all black clothing, like robes. His clothing has a hoodie over his head, but leaving room for his face. His face is covered by a rust colored gas mask.

LITTLE GIRL: Momma said…you loved…
THE ARCHANGEL: …

4/ The little girl coughing up globs of blood and tissue.

5/ The Archangel standing over her.

THE ARCHANGEL: God hates you.

6/ The little girl on her knees, blood stained on her dress, looking up.

LITTLE GIRL: Wh…what..?

Page 2

1/ The Archangel uncomfortably close to her face.

THE ARCHANGEL: God hates you.

2/ The little girl, absolutely crushed in multiple levels.

LITTLE GIRL: N-no--

3/ The little girl’s eyes, puffed red and bleeding.

THE ARCHANGEL: You’re dead now.

4/ The Archangel standing over the little girl’s corpse.

THE ARCHANGEL: God hates you. Because you were born here.
THE ARCHANGEL: Born to embrace me.

Page 3

1/ The Archangel standing near the glowing pond. The little girl is there with him, but not as a body, as a soul.

THE ARCHANGEL: And through me, you will meet God.
LITTLE GIRL: Wh-wha--

2/ The Archangel standing over the pond, holding the little girl’s soul by the manifestation of the arm.

THE ARCHANGEL: And I will show you that he hates you.
LITTLE GIRL: I’m scared…

3/ The Archangel’s face.

THE ARCHANGEL: “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: For thou art with me”.

4/ The little girl’s soul looking up at The Archangel, as if filled with hope.

5/ The pond.

THE ARCHANGEL: But God does not walk with you through the valley.
THE ARCHANGEL: God does not save you from the fear.

Page 4

1/ The Archangel stepping back with the little girl’s soul.

THE ARCHANGEL: God is your fear.

2/ The pond erupts violently, dozens of squid-like tentacles thrashing violently above the surface, reaching for the little girl.

THE ARCHANGEL: He has lain in darkness dreaming for far, far too long.
LITTLE GIRL: AIIEEEE!!!!!

3/ The Archangel steps back as she is caught by Cthulhu.

THE ARCHANGEL: God is hungry.

4/ The Archangel’s face.

THE ARCHANGEL: God is not your shepherd.

5/ The pond’s surface, bubbling and thrashing.

THE ARCHANGEL: God is your butcher.

Page 5

1/ The Rake jumping toward Ghost Rider, claws out.

THE RAKE: REEEEEE

2/ Ghost Rider throwing out his molten chain at The Rake.

3/ The Rake in mid-air, wrapped up.

THE RAKE: HRRR!!!

4/ Ghost Rider throwing The Rake up into the air by the chain, still holding him in the grip.

Page 6

1/ The Rake slashing through the chain in the air.

SFX: CHRRRKK

2/ Ghost Rider’s surprised reaction.

GHOST RIDER: What?!

3/ The Rake darting down the chain as if in slow-motion, claws out.

THE RAKE: DIE

4/ Back to regular speed, The Rake has slashed Ghost Rider across the skull and the force has thrown him back.

SFX: SRKSSS
THE RAKE: REEEEEEE!!!!!!!

5/ Ghost Rider on the ground, looking over at The Rake.

GHOST RIDER: Sh*t!

Page 7

1/ Isaac.

ISAAC: WEGROWSTRONGER

2/ The forest.

ISAAC: OURLORDFEASTSONTHEDEAD

3/ The Archangel tossing in another soul into the pond, this one of a man.

ISAAC: THEOLDONEWILLMEETYOU
ISAAC: ONCEYOUEMBRACETHEARCHANGEL

4/ The Rake running at Ghost Rider with insane speed.

THE RAKE: HSSSSSSS

5/ Ghost Rider uppercutting The Rake with a fist covered in hellfire, sending him flying.

GHOST RIDER: F**K YOU!!!

Page 8

1/ The Rake tumbling in mid-air.

THE RAKE: GRGHH

2/ Ghost Rider opening his mouth.

3/ Ghost Rider’s mouth acting as a massive flamethrower, scorching the air all the way up to where The Rake is.

SFX: FRRRWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM

Page 9

1/ The Rake’s charred body slamming down hard into the ground.

SFX: WHUMP

2/ Ghost Rider taking a stance and spraying fire out of his mouth all toward The Rake’s landing spot.

SFX: FRRRWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM

3/ The Rake leaping out of the flames with his claws out.

THE RAKE: EEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!

4/ The Rake impaling Ghost Rider through the chest with his claws.

THE RAKE: REEEE!!!! REEEEE!!!!!
GHOST RIDER: GRGH!!

5/ Isaac turning his head to look toward the forest.

ISAAC: TIME?

Page 10

1/ Ghost Rider looking at The Rake close up.

GHOST RIDER: GRRG
THE RAKE: HSSSSS
CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: I’ve discovered that I can do a few new tricks over the last few years.

2/ Ghost Rider tossing his body sharply to the left, throwing The Rake off of him, his claws slipping out.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: This one, I’m afraid to use.

3/ The Rake charging at Ghost Rider.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: No other options. I need to find out what the f**k’s happening.

4/ Ghost Rider grabbing The Rake by his throat.

THE RAKE: GRRGG

Page 11

1/ Ghost Rider shoving The Rake’s head into the ground, which has formed a literal portal to hell itself.

GHOST RIDER: MEET THE PIT!
THE RAKE: HSSSSSSSSSEEEERRRRRRR
SFX: GRRGGHHHHHHHH
SFX: HSSSSSSSSSS
CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: I will NOT be sucked down there. Never again.

2/ Ghost Rider taking his arm out of the portal and backing away a bit, watching as The Rake is dragged into hell by the hands of thousands of demons.

THE RAKE: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
HELL: HSSSSSSRRRRRRRWWWWWWGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

3/ Ghost Rider staring at the portal, which is closing.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: NEVER. EVER.

4/ Isaac walking toward the forest.

ISAAC: THERAKEHASFALLEN
ISAAC: TAKEME

5/ Ghost Rider looking over.

GHOST RIDER: Ohhhhh no you don’t.

Page 12

1/ Ghost Rider throwing his arm out.

GHOST RIDER: I’m SICK of your BULLSH*T!

2/ Same shot, but three chains (that are NOT molten) are bursting out of Ghost Rider’s sleeve and lashing out.

GHOST RIDER: You come out and FACE ME!

3/ Isaac looking down as his body is wrapped by the chains.

ISAAC: NO!
ISAAC: NEEDHIM!

4/ Isaac being dragged toward Ghost Rider by the chains.

GHOST RIDER: WHATEVER YOU ARE, GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE!!

5/ The forest’s exit, behind one of the trees, Slenderman looks out toward the scene.

SLENDERMAN: …
CAPTION: THE ARCHANGEL: Distract him.
CAPTION: THE ARCHANGEL: God isn’t ready to face Zarathos yet.
SLENDERMAN: …

Page 13

1/ Splash Page/ Slenderman walking out from the forest, his arms open.

SLENDERMAN: (X)
(His text bubble is filled with operator symbols when he “speaks”, leaving his true voice up to the reader’s interpretation)

Page 14

1/ Ghost Rider looking at Slenderman, cutting the chain links from him to Isaac, leaving Isaac bundled up in chains.

GHOST RIDER: The hell does that mean?

2/ Isaac looking at Slenderman.

ISAAC: GIVEMETHEBOY!!!
ISAAC: GIVEMETHEBOY!!!
ISAAC: GIVEMETHEBOY!!!

3/ Ghost Rider.

GHOST RIDER: F**K YOU!

4/ Slenderman tilting his head.

SLENDERMAN: (X)

5/ Slenderman.

SLENDERMAN: (X)

6/ Isaac.

ISAAC: ONELASTONEBEFOREGOD
ISAAC: INEEDTHEBOY
ISAAC: BEFOREGOD
ISAAC: ONELASTONE

Page 15

1/ Ghost Rider looking at Slenderman.

GHOST RIDER: Who’s your God, anyway?! Why the hell are you scumbuckets killing everyone here with your diseased little FREAKJOB?

2/ Slenderman titling his head the other way.

SLENDERMAN: (X)
ISAAC: CTHULURLYEHWGAHNAGLFHTAGN
ISAAC: CTHULURLYEHWGAHNAGLFHTAGN
ISAAC: CTHULURLYEHWGAHNAGLFHTAGN

3/ Ghost Rider looking down at Isaac.

GHOST RIDER: …. Wait a sec….
GHOST RIDER: CTHULHU--

4/ Ghost Rider’s head cocked back from a punch by Slenderman’s shadowed fist.

GHOST RIDER: --GHKK!!

5/ Slenderman walking toward Ghost Rider, who is adjusting his skull like he has no idea what just happened.

GHOST RIDER: F**K!
ISAAC: LETTHEBOYGO

Page 16

1/ Ghost Rider looking at Slenderman.

GHOST RIDER: Hell n--

2/ Slenderman’s fist stretched out and knocking Ghost Rider over with a vicious punch to the side of his skull.

SFX: WHAK

3/ Isaac.

ISAAC: THENIWILLTAKEHIM

Page 17

1/ The Archangel standing near the pond, his hand out, interacting with a few Lovecraftian tentacles that are slithered up out of the pond.

THE ARCHANGEL: Yes….

2/ Overhead of a main part of the town. There are dead all over, scattered in the streets.

THE ARCHANGEL: You’re almost here with us again, God.

3/ Slenderman grabbing Ghost Rider by the throat and holding him up 10 feet in the air with a stretched arm.

CAPTION: THE ARCHANGEL: You gave us life with these human thoughts, gave us shape with their fear… of course we will make you whole again.

Page 18

1/ Splash Page/ The inside of the pond. A large egg with a leathery surface, and a small opening at the top, through which the tentacles shown so far travel up to the surface.

Page 19 And Page 20

1/ Double Spread/ Ghost Rider tossed down to the ground by Slenderman, who’s limbs have grown out longer than before. Isaac is visible, rambling.

SLENDERMAN: (X)
ISAAC: TODAYTHEGODRISES
ISAAC: THEOLDONEWEHOLDDEAR
GHOST RIDER: NGH
ISAAC: TODAYYOUARETHEFIRSTTODIE
ISAAC: ZARATHOSDIES
ISAAC: VENGEANCE

--

TO BE CONTINUED: Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces #4 - (Script)

I OWN: ISAAC EBERTH, NIGHTINGALE

I DON'T OWN: GHOST RIDER, CTHULHU, SLENDERMAN, THE RAKE, PLAGUE DOCTOR, THE ARCHANGEL

5 Comments

Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces #2 - (Script)

PREVIOUSLY: Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces #1 - (Script)

"WATCHINGYOU" - RATED T+

Page 1

1/ Plague Doctor’s face under Ghost Rider’s boot.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: Cthulhu r'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!!!!
GHOST RIDER: I’ve heard that somewhere before…

2/ Ghost Rider looking up. The sky around the town is glowing dark green, but there’s an “eye of the storm” in the middle where the sky is normal (indicating that the town is trapped).

GHOST RIDER: The hell?
PLAGUE DOCTOR: It’s starting.

3/ Ghost Rider looking down.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: My works come to fruition, and all that remains is the heavy labor of finishing off the food, once they fall over ill…

4/ Plague Doctor.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: You’re all trapped here now, Zarathos. Not even you can break the seal. The Old One himself powers it…

5/ Ghost Rider’s eyesockets.

GHOST RIDER: I’m sick of your bullsh*t.
SFX: FRWWOOOM

Page 2

1/ Ghost Rider walking away from Plague Doctor, who is now in a living funeral pyre, squirming slightly as he burns.

2/ Ghost Rider stepping toward his motorcycle.

3/ The motorcycle bursts into flames, transforming into a hellcycle as Ghost Rider is standing right next to it.

SFX: VRRRRMMMMM

4/ Ghost Rider riding past the bar.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: First thing’s first.

Page 3

1/ Isaac’s neighbor walking out of the front door slowly, as if possessed.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: Ignore that idiot’s ramblin’s and break the seal. Chances are I’ll manage and he’s just a liar.
CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: They’re all liars.
ISAAC: H-hey!

2/ Isaac’s neighbor standing outside of the house.

NEIGHBOR: Take me…

3/ Slenderman walking toward Isaac’s neighbor, his arms wide open.

CAPTION: YOUR OPERATOR WILL CONNECT YOU SHORTLY

4/ Isaac’s face as he looks out from the doorway.

ISAAC: AAH!!

5/ Slenderman hugging Isaac’s neighbor.

6/ Isaac’s face as he looks away.

Page 4

1/ Slenderman standing alone. There’s an Operator Symbol on the ground, where Isaac’s neighbor was standing. The symbol is made out of ashes.

2/ Isaac backing up from the door, panicking visibly. Anything electronic with a monitor is on and showing an Operator Symbol.

CAPTION: SMILE FOR THE CAMERA
CAPTION: SMILE FOR THE CAMERA
ISAAC: H-H-Uh-h-
CAPTION: ISAAC: These aren’t real. Can’t be real. They’re all stories. Stories I’ve gotten on my email.
CAPTION: SMILE FOR THE CAMERA

3/ The doorway from Isaac’s perspective. Slenderman is still standing there.

CAPTION: SMILE
CAPTION: ISAAC: The Slenderman who abducts children and drives young adults insane.

4/ The doorway from Isaac’s perspective. The Rake has dropped down from the roof and is now crouched there. Slenderman is no longer in the background.

CAPTION: ISAAC, SMILE FOR THE CAMERA
CAPTION: ISAAC: The Rake who just plain murders people.
CAPTION: ISAAC: Can’t be can’t be can’t be can’t be real.

5/ The Rake’s eyes.

CAPTION: ISAAC: OH GOD I NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE
CAPTION: ISAAC: THE PILLS WON’T DO ANYTHING THIS IS REAL

Page 5

1/ Isaac running through his house, toward the back. The Rake is jumping after him, claws raised.

THE RAKE: SSSHHKKKREEEEE!!!!!!

2/ Isaac falls on his stomach, The Rake is right behind him, raising his claws.

3/ Isaac manages to sprawl out of that position just in time to avoid The Rake’s claws.

THE RAKE: HSSSSS!!!

4/ Isaac fumbling with the back door.

ISAAC: AA-AA--!!!

5/ Isaac running out of the back of his house, again just missing The Rake’s claws, which slash through the doorway like paper.

SFX: SHRK
THE RAKE: SSSSHHHKRRREEE!!!!

Page 6

1/ Ghost Rider riding through a section of the town.

SFX: VRRRRRMMMMM

2/ Ghost Rider looking over from the handlebars.

GHOST RIDER: He wasn’t lyin’ about the sick part…

3/ Various people of the town are falling over, or doubling over, coughing and vomiting.

4/ Ghost Rider focusing on moving forward again, revving up the hellcycle.

Page 7

1/ Ghost Rider looking up ahead to see Isaac’s house and the forests beyond.

2/ Ghost Rider speeding up in that direction.

SFX: VRRRMMMMMMM

3/ Isaac running as fast as he can.

ISAAC: AH-AH—AH--
ISAAC: S-SOMEONE

4/ The Rake’s eyes.

ISAAC: P-LE-PLEA

5/ Ghost Rider’s eyesockets.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: The burning hate opens up inside again.
CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: That urge to just scorch anything made of sin.

6/ The Rake’s eyes. There’s a glint of bright orange.

CAPTION: GHOST RIDER: What the hell. I can spare a minute.
THE RAKE: HSSSSREEEE!!!!

Page 8

1/ Splash Page/ Ghost Rider running over The Rake with his hellcycle.

SFX: VRRRAAASSSSHHH
THE RAKE: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
GHOST RIDER: RAHH!!

Page 9

1/ Isaac on his hands and knees, looking toward a large yellow glow.

ISAAC: W-
ISAAC: Oh god…

2/ Ghost Rider sitting on his hellcycle, which is literally parked on top of The Rake. Ghost Rider’s boot is stomped down on The Rake’s head, keeping his face firmly planted into the ground.

GHOST RIDER: No, thank YOU.

3/ Isaac starting to stand up.

ISAAC: U—Uh, sorry. I--

4/ Ghost Rider looking down.

GHOST RIDER: Save it. Jokin’.
GHOST RIDER: I don’t give a f**k about praise anyway.

5/ Ghost Rider looking up.

GHOST RIDER: Friend of yours?

Page 10

1/ Isaac.

ISAAC: N-no.
ISAAC: Tried to kill me…

2/ Isaac looking down.

ISAAC: I never even got to tell him about his brother…

3/ Isaac looking up.

ISAAC: Um..

4/ Ghost Rider.

GHOST RIDER: I’m not one of these things.

5/ Isaac.

ISAAC: Good.

Page 11

1/ Ghost Rider looking down at The Rake.

GHOST RIDER: Glad that you’re not questionin’ what I am. Makes things a lot less annoying.

2/ Same shot.

ISAAC: You’re Ghost Rider, you fight demons and other sinners.
GHOST RIDER: Googled me. Finally, they get their sh*t right.

3/ Ghost Rider looking toward Isaac.

GHOST RIDER: The whole town’s starting to get sick.
GHOST RIDER: We’re locked in some kinda barrier.

4/ Isaac looking up at the green sky.

ISAAC: Holy sh*t…

Page 12

1/ Isaac looking at Ghost Rider.

ISAAC: There was one other thing like that.

2/ The forest.

3/ Isaac.

ISAAC: It killed a friend of mine.

4/ The Rake, squirming.

THE RAKE: MFFFFFRRRRRR

5/ Ghost Rider, surprised that The Rake is struggling.

GHOST RIDER: Strong little f**k.
GHOST RIDER: I love watchin’ ‘em suffer.

Page 13

1/ The forest.

2/ Isaac’s eyes.

ISAAC: He’sComing.

3/ Ghost Rider looking up.

GHOST RIDER: What?

4/ Isaac’s mouth.

ISAAC: HE’SCOMINGFORYOU

5/ The forest.

Page 14

1/ Black. Operator Symbol.

2/ The forest.

3/ Isaac standing perfectly straight and perfectly still.

ISAAC: LOVELYRIDER
ISAAC: SMILEFORTHECAMERA

4/ Ghost Rider looking around.

GHOST RIDER: Possessions, possessions…

5/ Isaac’s eyes.

ISAAC: JOHNNYBLAZE
ISAAC: OLDONECOMES
ISAAC: NOTHINGCANSTOPIT

Page 15

1/ The Rake throws Ghost Rider and his hellcycle off of him in an absolutely insane feat of strength.

THE RAKE: GRAWWWRR!!!
GHOST RIDER: YAAGHH!!

2/ Isaac’s pupils.

3/ Black. Operator Symbol.

4/ Isaac’s pupils, Operator Symbols in each.

5/ The Rake snarling, running at Ghost Rider. Ghost Rider and his bike are separate, so it’s just a regular motorcycle right now.

THE RAKE: GRAWWWWRRR!!!!!

Page 16

1/ Ghost Rider’s mouth firing out a single chain spike.


2/ The Rake in mid-air, impaled through the chest by the chain spike.

SFX: GSHHH

3/ The Rake fallen, eyes bleeding.

THE RAKE: GRGGG…KILL…KILL…
THE RAKE: OLD ONE… MUST KILL FOR…

Page 17

1/ Isaac with his arms wide open. As if expecting a hug.

ISAAC: THERAKEWILLNOTDIE

2/ The forest.

3/ The Rake getting up, ripping the spike out of his chest and healing.

THE RAKE: Hrrr…

4/ Ghost Rider getting up.

GHOST RIDER: You gotta be sh*ttin’ me…

Page 18

1/ A lone figure standing in front of the large, dark green glowing pond, shadowed.

ISAAC: YOUWILLSOONMEET
ISAAC: THEANGEL

2/ Ghost Rider holding his hand out, looking at his wrist.

GHOST RIDER: Yeah yeah.

3/ A chain link popping out of Ghost Rider’s sleeve.

4/ Ghost Rider’s hand grabbing the link and yanking. The chain starts to glow, molten.

5/ Isaac’s eyes. Operator Symbols.

ISAAC: DOUBT?

Page 19 And Page 20

1/ Double Spread/ Ghost Rider holding a full molten chain that circles around him several times with one hand, looking toward The Rake.

GHOST RIDER: You’re goddamn right.

--

TO BE CONTINUED: Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces #3 - (Script)

I OWN: ISAAC EBERTH, NIGHTINGALE

I DON'T OWN: SLENDERMAN, THE RAKE, PLAGUE DOCTOR, CTHULHU

7 Comments

Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces #1 - (Script)

PREVIOUSLY: Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces Prologue - (Script)

"He'll Save Me." - RATED T+

Page 1

1/ Isaac standing outside of the small house next to his own.

CAPTION: ISAAC: Just knock on the door and it’ll be okay.

2/ Isaac knocking on the door.

CAPTION: ISAAC: My neighbor will answer and his brother will be in the background hanging out. Just like always.

3/ The door opened to show Isaac’s neighbor, who looks a bit similar to the jogger, looking out.

NEIGHBOR: Hey, Isaac. Sup?
ISAAC: Hey, um, I was wondering… you seen your brother?
NEIGHBOR: He went out for a jog.

4/ Isaac’s face, he’s trying to suppress panic.

CAPTION: ISAAC: OH GOD THIS IS REAL!!!

5/ Same

ISAAC: Oh. Okay, he uh, owes me five bucks I lent him.
ISAAC: Sorry.

6/ Isaac walking away from his neighbor’s place and towards his own, as his neighbor shuts his door.

NEIGHBOR: No prob!

Page 2

1/ Isaac inside his apartment after shutting his door, with a panicked look.

ISAAC: …

2/ Isaac looking over at his desktop computer.

ISAAC: Just… need to think about something else.

3/ Isaac’s Gmail account, a new message.

FROM: Joseph Lawton
SUBJECT: Dude, read this! Creepy! Everyone’s sent this to me! :O

4/ Isaac looking oddly at his computer screen.

CAPTION: ISAAC: We’re a secluded, nice little town. When someone finds something interesting on the internet, we basically end up spreading it to everyone’s computer like a virus.
CAPTION: ISAAC: We all know each other. I need a break from life right now.

5/ Isaac’s cursor hovering over the email.

CAPTION: ISAAC: Wait. I need a drink.

Page 3

1/ Outside of the local bar, focus on Johnny Blaze’s bike.

2/ Inside of the bar, Blaze standing in front of the bar and about to sit down. The bar’s got about five other guys, all playing pool in the background.

JOHNNY BLAZE: Strongest thing ya got, biggest amount you can give.
BARTENDER: You got that kinda money?
JOHNNY BLAZE: I’ll manage.

3/ The Bartender looking toward the door, worried. Blaze has a huge mug of booze and about a dozen shot glasses next to it, all full and ready for him.

SFX: KNOK KNOK
BARTENDER: Doc’s here.

4/ The pool players putting their game away, nervously.

5/ The door to the bar opening. The PLAGUE DOCTOR stepping in. He has clothing like the grim reaper, and his mask is like a steampunk bird. He’s a tall figure, and he stands as if he’s ten feet taller than he really is and just leaning down and curling in his black cloak. He has gloves that are black and leather.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: New.

Page 4

1/ Isaac’s computer screen, showing an image of a Plague Doctor, with a wall of text next to it. He’s reading a horror story online.

ISAAC: Goddamn.

2/ Isaac’s eyes, the text reflected in them.

3/ Focus on the story he’s reading.

CAPTION: “He looked at me and we were alone, trapped behind the buildings, the alleys all coming together to this point. I was at a dead end. He snorted and reached into his clothing….”

4/ Plague Doctor in the bar, across from Blaze, reaching into his clothing.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: Everyone out. Inoculation to prevent plague. Now.

5/ The bartender stepping away and with the other patrons, walking past Plague Doctor and toward the door.

JOHNNY BLAZE: Where you guys goin?

6/ The bartender behind Plague Doctor, looking over.

BARTENDER: This’s our town doctor, it’s best to just listen to him. He speaks broken English, but trust me, he’s saved us from a dozen plagues. This happens when outsiders come in. Just be nice and it’ll be over, and we’ll all be safe.
PLAGUE DOCTOR: Out.
BARTENDER: Sorry.

Page 5

1/ Plague Doctor staring at Blaze.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: Feel it?

2/ Blaze glaring.

JOHNNY BLAZE: … Yeah, I do. You’re not human.

3/ Blaze’s eyes, starting to glow like fire.

JOHNNY BLAZE: Somethin’ else.

4/ Plague Doctor reaching his arm into his back, in an unnatural contortion.

CAPTION: “I gulped and started shaking.”

PLAGUE DOCTOR: You won’t ruin it. Been here for two weeks. Help the sick here.
PLAGUE DOCTOR: A few die, but the rest saved each time.
PLAGUE DOCTOR: You won’t stop it. Can’t stop it.

5/ Johnny Blaze stepping down from the stool, his face melting off and the hellfire starting on his head and neck and shoulders.

GHOST RIDER: The f**k are you talking about?

Page 6

1/ Splash Page/ Plague Doctor holding a large scythe, the handle of which is covered in sickness: tumors, oozing sores, bubonic plague warts, the works. The scythe’s blade is blood red, dripping with actual blood.

CAPTION: “He took out the scythe, made of sickness and terror. He slashed me with it, and disappeared. Over the next five days, I got sick. And sicker. And sicker.”

PLAGUE DOCTOR: The Old One will be with us again soon.
PLAGUE DOCTOR: You can’t stop it, Zarathos.

Page 7

1/ Ghost Rider grabbing the beer mug.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: Weeks of saving the town to gain trust.
PLAGUE DOCTOR: Weeks of souls harnessed.

2/ The beer mug. The beer inside is slowly changing. Turning into boiling tar.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: It’s tonight, Zarathos. You won’t stop it.

3/ Ghost Rider with the mug of boiling tar in his hand.

GHOST RIDER: Not sure how you know what I am, or why you think I know your big plan, but I don’t give a f**k.
GHOST RIDER: All I wanted. Was one. Single. Goddamn. Drink.

4/ Plague Doctor, tilting his head while he holds the scythe.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: You didn’t come to stop it?

5/ The story Isaac’s reading, near the end. Under more text, to indicate the story is longer than the snippets seen so far.

CAPTION: “After all of that …. I died. And then I wrote it all down.”

6/ Isaac’s reaction (a bit unsettled).

ISAAC: …

Page 8

1/ Ghost Rider tossing the mug of molten tar at Plague Doctor.

GHOST RIDER: ONE F**KING DRINK, GODDAMMIT! JUST ONE!

2/ Plague Doctor raising his scythe in defense, the tar splashes onto it and some of him.

SFX: SSSSS
PLAGUE DOCTOR: GRK

3/ Ghost Rider’s bare bony hand on the bar, palm flat on the wood, next to the multiple vodka shot glasses. The shot glasses are melting, and the vodka is turning to molten tar as well.

SFX: SSSSSS

4/ Ghost Rider leaning forward and spitting out multiple spiked molten chain links.

GHOST RIDER: AGGH!
SFX: CHK

5/ The outside of the bar. The bartender is leaning against the wall, and his patrons are waiting nearby.

BARTENDER: I hope the new guy didn’t bring any germs with him…
PATRON 1: Lord knows that’s the last thing we need.
PATRON 2: After the past few weeks, it’s a miracle we ain’t been quarantined by the government.

Page 9

1/ Plague Doctor violently thrown out through the door and parts of the wall of the bar, several chain spikes impaling him through the chest and out his back.

SFX: KRAKK
BARTENDER: JESUS--!!

2/ The Bartender and his patrons looking toward the massive hole where the door used to be.

BARTENDER: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU?!

3/ Ghost Rider walking out the door, glaring the Bartender in the face.

GHOST RIDER: An unsatisfied customer.
BARTENDER: I—I--
GHOST RIDER: Leave. Now.

4/ Plague Doctor sprawled out on the ground, reaching for his scythe. Ghost Rider walking toward him. The bartender and his patrons running.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: No hiding anymore. You can’t stop it.

5/ Ghost Rider stomping his boot down on Plague Doctors arm, right as he was in reach of his scythe.

GHOST RIDER: Can’t stop WHAT?

Page 10

1/ Isaac looking over from his computer chair.

SFX: NOK NOK

2/ Isaac getting up.

3/ Isaac walking toward the door.

SFX: NOK NOK
NEIGHBOR: Isaac! Please!

4/ Isaac standing in front of the open door facing his neighbor. Neighbor isn’t visible.

ISAAC: What the hell...

5/ Isaac’s neighbor has a strange marking cut into his face, the kind of cut so precise that it is bloody without bleeding everywhere. It’s a circle, cut around the face, and an X cut over the face.

NEIGHBOR: I—I woke up and this was on my face and-
NEIGHBOR: Have you seen my brother? Because if this was him I’m gonna--
ISAAC: I—have no idea.

Page 11

1/ Plague Doctor looking up at Ghost Rider.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: This town’s done.
PLAGUE DOCTOR: This world’s done.
PLAGUE DOCTOR: Life’s done.

2/ The bottom of Ghost Rider’s boot is now glowing bright orange, and Plague Doctor’s flesh underneath it is melting.

SFX: SSSSS
PLAGUE DOCTOR: GHHH
GHOST RIDER: I want ANSWERS that ANSWER THINGS, ASSHOLE.
GHOST RIDER: NOT ANSWERS THAT RAISE QUESTIONS.

3/ Plague Doctor looking at his arm.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: It only hurts for a moment
PLAGUE DOCTOR: And then the scabbing sets in and the sores and the pus and the mold and the--

4/ Ghost Rider’s eye sockets.

GHOST RIDER: TALK!!! WHAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN!?

5/ Plague Doctor looking up.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: I don’t exist
PLAGUE DOCTOR: None of me does
PLAGUE DOCTOR: My pain is fake, imagined, sent through the thoughts
PLAGUE DOCTOR: The pond created me like it will the others
PLAGUE DOCTOR: The pond is where it begins again
PLAGUE DOCTOR: Even though you ended it once Zarathos, you and the other pitspawn and skyfathers and the Sorcerer Supreme

Page 12

1/ Plague Doctor looking at his arm, which has now fully melted, Ghost Rider’s boot between the two sections of severed limb, no longer glowing like it was. The gore of Plague Doctor isn’t blood, but instead a thick yellow pus.

PLAGUE DOCTOR: Sealed the Old One into the abyss
PLAGUE DOCTOR: But he persists anyway
PLAGUE DOCTOR: Through nightmares and the delusions of the insane
PLAGUE DOCTOR: Through writers and television and cinema and the world wide web

2/ Ghost Rider glaring down at Plague Doctor.

GHOST RIDER: Who’s the Old One?

3/ Isaac’s neighbor sitting on Isaac’s couch, using a paper towel and a bottle of peroxide loaned by Isaac to fix his face. There’s a small table in front of the couch. Isaac isn’t visible.

NEIGHBOR: This is gonna leave a scar. What kind of f**ker does that?!
ISAAC: No idea, but damn. I’m sorry.

4/ Isaac walking out of the kitchen with another roll of paper towels.

ISAAC: I’ve seen that mark before…
NEIGHBOR: Yeah?

5/ Isaac handing his neighbor the roll.

ISAAC: Yeah… in those creepy stories that the whole town’s been circulating for the past month.
ISAAC: The videos.

Page 13

1/ Isaac’s neighbor putting the roll down on the table.

NEIGHBOR: You mean those fake documentary things?
ISAAC: Yup.
NEIGHBOR: I couldn’t sleep after those things. Freaking scary.

2/ Isaac sitting in his computer chair and looking toward his neighbor.

ISAAC: Just saying, that’s the symbol. It’s called the “operator symbol” if I remember right.
NEIGHBOR: F**ked up sh*t.
ISAAC: Yeah.

3/ Isaac’s cell phone next to his desktop buzzing.

SFX: BZZ

4/ Isaac with the phone in his ear.

ISAAC: Hello?
PHONE: SHHHHHHH
ISAAC: ….

5/ Isaac’s face. Reaction: scared.

PHONE: Your operator will connect you shortly.
PHONE: SKZZZ
PHONE: Smile for the camera. You’re being monitored.
PHONE: FRZZZ
PHONE: Your operator will connect you shortly.
ISAAC: H…hello?

6/ Isaac holding the phone silently, frozen.

PHONE: FFSSS
PHONE: Smile for the camera. You’re being monitored.
ISAAC: Please—just tell me who this is?
PHONE: BSSZZ
PHONE: Your operator will connect you shortly.
ISAAC: This isn’t funny, whoever you are I--
PHONE: Isaac.
PHONE: Your operator will connect you shortly.

7/ Isaac throwing his cell phone down. His neighbor is startled.

ISAAC: AGHH!!!

Page 14

1/ Isaac looking at his neighbor.

NEIGHBOR: Are you okay?
ISAAC: I—I—I DON’T---

2/ Isaac’s cell phone is broken, and vibrating.

SFX: BZZZZ

3/ Isaac kicking his phone away.

ISAAC: AH!!!
ISAAC: F**K!!

4/ Isaac tearing his desk apart looking for his medication.

ISAAC: Just a—just a second—just a
NEIGHBOR: DUDE, calm down!! You’re shaking!

5/ Isaac’s hand on his medication bottle.

ISAAC: Just a panic spell, we all—all get em, you too!

Page 15

1/ Isaac’s front door.

SFX: NOK NOK

2/ Isaac looking over, his neighbor at his side.

NEIGHBOR: Isaac, I know we all get nervous, but you look like you’re gonna BURST. Breathe!
ISAAC: Someone….

3/ Isaac’s neighbor looking over.

SFX: NOK NOK

4/ Same shot.

NEIGHBOR: I’ll get it.

Page 16

1/ Splash Page/ Overhead of the entire town. The outside of the town is glowing dark green, and the light if firing upward. Like a wall around the entire town.

Page 17

1/ Isaac’s neighbor in front of the door, reaching for the doorknob.

2/ Ghost Rider’s boot stomped onto Plague Doctor’s mask.

GHOST RIDER: WELL!?

3/ Isaac’s neighbor standing in front of the open door. There’s no one there, but the neighbor is looking outside as if someone is standing farther away.

NEIGHBOR: …

Page 18

1/ Black.

ISAAC: …. Are you okay?

2/ A single Operator Symbol in the black. Scribbled white lines.

ISAAC: Hey, um—hello?

3/ Operator Symbols cover most of the black.

ISAAC: Talk to me!!

Page 19

1/ Splash Page/ SLENDERMAN standing outside, in front of Isaac’s house. About 10 feet tall.

CAPTION: PLAGUE DOCTOR: Cthulhu r'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
CAPTION: PLAGUE DOCTOR: Cthulhu r'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
CAPTION: PLAGUE DOCTOR: Cthulhu r'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
CAPTION: PLAGUE DOCTOR: Cthulhu r'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
CAPTION: PLAGUE DOCTOR: Cthulhu r'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

Page 20

1/ Isaac’s house. Isaac’s neighbor is dumbstruck by what he’s seeing in the front. THE RAKE is perched on the roof, moving his claws against one another in anticipation.

2/ The Rake’s eyes.

3/ Isaac’s neighbor’s face. The Operator Symbol in his face is bleeding.

4/ Slenderman.

CAPTION: YOUR OPERATOR WILL CONNECT YOU SHORTLY.

---

TO BE CONTINUED: Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces #2 - (Script)

I OWN: ISAAC, THE TOWN OF NIGHTINGALE AND ANY OTHER RESIDENTS

I DIDN'T CREATE: GHOST RIDER, PLAGUE DOCTOR, SLENDERMAN, THE RAKE, CTHULHU

Plague Doctor
Operator Symbol
Slenderman
The Rake
7 Comments

Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces Prologue - (Script)

"Nothing Ever Happens Here..." - RATED T+

Page 1

1/ Overhead view of a small town. No building over 4 stories tall. The town is surrounded by forest. There’s a road into the town and a road out of it. Then another road doing the same. The position of the roads, coupled with the town, form a circle with an X over it. There are no cars going in and out, the town isn’t busy.

It’s late afternoon. The sun is setting.

CAPTION: NIGHTINGALE, KANSAS

2/ The outside of a small neighborhood.

3/ A trail from the neighborhood to a forest around it.

Page 2

1/ Further into the forest, further down the trail. The trees are tall and all around.

2/ A large group of rocks next to a river, next to the trail.

3/ A jogger along the path, stopped and panting, holding bottled water in his hand.

4/ The jogger looking over his shoulder.

5/ The jogger has a look of absolute horror on his face.

Page 3

1/ Splash Page/ The jogger looking up as GHOST RIDER on his bike flies over him, dragging a large tree by his hand and by glowing red chains (glowing due to the heat of hellfire) that are coming out of the sleeve of his hand. The tree is visibly alive, no eyes, but a large mouth with disturbing fangs. The chains are burning into the tree’s body.

TREE MONSTER: GRARRRR!!
JOGGER: !!!

Page 4

1/ Ghost Rider tossing the Tree Monster away from him, toward a group of shrubs.

GHOST RIDER: HRGH!!
TREE MONSTER: HSSSS!!!

2/ The Tree Monster starts to stand up, using branches like vines to do so. Any marking left by the chains are gone.

TREE MONSTER: HSSSSS!!!

3/ Ghost Rider standing with one foot off his hellcycle, aiming his arm out and pointing.

GHOST RIDER: What ARE YOU?

4/ Ghost Rider’s arm, chains are visible, forming out from under his sleeves, and they’re glowing like before.

5/ Ghost Rider shouting as the molten chains shoot out again.

GHOST RIDER: WELL!?

Page 5

1/ The Tree Monster impaled through the front by multiple molten chains, which have straightened out, taught.

TREE MONSTER: SSSATAN IS NOTHING!

2/ Tree Monster’s mouth.

TREE MONSTER: SSSSSATAN IS NOTHING TO WHAT YOU’LL HAVE TO FACE
TREE MONSTER: SWALLOW YER F**KIN SOUL
TREE MONSTER: SSSATAN
TREE MONSTER: SATAN NOTHIN

3/ The Jogger behind Ghost Rider, looking up through some partially burnt brush.

TREE MONSTER: HSSS!!

4/ The Jogger as several vines from the Tree Monster impale him through the eyes and burst out the back of his skull in a bloody mess.

SFX: GSHH
GHOST RIDER: DAMMIT!!

Page 6

1/ Ghost Rider looking at the Tree Monster and glowing with a brighter glint of hellfire in his skull than before.

GHOST RIDER: ENOUGH’S ENOUGH!!

2/ Ghost Rider spewing fire out of his mouth and at the Tree Monster. Not just a trail, but a wall of flame.

SFX: FWOOOOSH

3/ The Tree Monster is entirely swallowed up by the flame.

TREE MONSTER: HSSSSSSSSS!!!!

4/ The Tree Monster breaking apart in the fire, into little chunks of bark.

Page 7

1/ Black panel.

CAPTION(Isaac): Holy sh*t.

2/ The outward end of black binoculars.

CAPTION(Isaac): An “Evil Dead” reject just got burned to bits by one of the most metal things I’ve ever seen in my entire life, and my neighbor’s brother just got f**king killed.
CAPTION(Isaac): What do I do? Do I—cops? No, running.

3/ Isaac Eberth, 18 year old brown haired brown eyed thin guy in outdoorsy clothes, running down the trail far away from Ghost Rider, but not far enough that you can’t see the flames.

CAPTION(Isaac): Run run run run run run run run!!!!!!

Page 8

1/ Ghost Rider standing over the charred remains, over a small brush fire that’s started thanks to his pyrotechnic stunt.

2/ Ghost Rider literally breathing in the flames, sucking them up into himself to prevent a forest fire.

3/ Ghost Rider looking up, his flesh starting to return, smoke escaping between human skin and bone.

4/ Johnny Blaze’s face, his hair is mostly grown back, still some patches of muscle tissue.

5/ Johnny Blaze, looking over at his regular motorcycle. He’s coughing up a bit of smoke, like he inhaled a cigarette wrong.

JOHNNY: HAK
JOHNNY: I hate doing that.
JOHNNY: Hrk…

Page 9

1/ Johnny sitting on his bike, looking over at the mangled jogger’s corpse.

JOHNNY: Cops’ll handle it.

2/ Johnny riding down the trail, toward town.

SFX: VRRR

3/ The inside of Isaac’s place, it’s a regular little cheap apartment. Isaac is inside, pacing and nervous.

CAPTION(Isaac): What if it saw me?
CAPTION(Isaac): Were those things working together, or—or--

4/ Isaac sitting down.

CAPTION(Isaac): Probably….probably nothing.

5/ Isaac opening a bottle of medication.

CAPTION(Isaac): Just a panic attack. Just a panic attack. Had ‘em since you were little, idiot.
CAPTION(Isaac): Just take the pill and take a nap and wake up fine. Sigh.

Page 10

1/ Splash Page/ The darkest, deepest part of the forest. There’s a large pond. The pond is glowing a neon green.

CAPTION(Isaac): Everyone in the town takes these. No one knows why, but we’ve played it off as part of our little culture. The nervous settlers, that’s what we called our ancestors. It’s not even weird.
CAPTION(Isaac): Outsiders make us nervous the most, though. Good thing is, they don’t stick around. They leave, or they end up missing.
CAPTION(Isaac): Used to think bad about it… but take a pill and get over it. That’s the plan.
CAPTION(Isaac): Need to sleep now.

--

TO BE CONTINUED: Ghost Rider: Evil's Many Faces #1 - (Script)

--

I DON'T OWN GHOST RIDER OR THE IDEA FOR THE TREE MONSTER ("EVIL DEAD")

I CREATED: ISAAC EBERTH

8 Comments

Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@%!" #5 - (FINALE, Script)

RATED M

Page 1

1/ Scavenger smiling.

SCAVENGER: They’ve got us locked up in here. Watching us.

2/ Scavenger’s head cocking back as Deadpool viciously punches him in the face.

SFX: WHUD

3/ Pan out to show the entire cage in a dark room. Deadpool is standing over Scavenger.

DEADPOOL: You can turn on the lights.

4/ Same shot. Except now there’s light in the room. The cage is at the center of a large council room. It’s circular, chairs surrounding the cage. The floor rises up, it’s almost like a stadium. There are several seated men watching from random spots all around the circle.

DEADPOOL: And I thought I was the creeper. Voyeurism? Really, guys?

Page 2

1/ Close up on a part of the audience. The chairman from earlier who we’ve focused on, standing up. His appearance can be pretty much anything for a man of his importance.

CHAIRMAN: This is Scavenger’s execution. Don’t let us stop you.

2/ Deadpool standing in the cage, right in front of the glass.

DEADPOOL: I’d love to take you up on that offer. But you first.

3/ Close up on the Chairman’s face.

CHAIRMAN: You’re not getting through that cage. The glass is reinforced RIDICULOUSLY.

4/ Close up on Deadpool, glaring.

DEADPOOL: Fine, fine. First, tell me about Cadneria. You guys aren’t a country. So, what are you?

5/ Profile view of the Chairman looking down.

CHAIRMAN: We catch terrorists in the Southern Hemisphere. We’re a faction of SHIELD. We lure them in here with promises of a new land, free to pillage and destroy. And then we capture them and execute them. But you already knew that. You talked to our soldiers.

Page 3

1/ Deadpool looking down at Scavenger. Scavenger is looking up at Deadpool.

DEADPOOL: Actually smartass, I had no f**king idea. I decided I wanted to get the info straight from a higher up, just to be absolutely sure.

2/ Profile view of Scavenger’s head. Deadpool’s boot is slammed down onto his face, keeping his head on the ground.

DEADPOOL: Now, where the holy batsh*t is my lucky gun?

3/ Back view of Deadpool, pointing up dramatically at the Chairman.

DEADPOOL: You have FIVE SECONDS to give my Bea back to me, or so help me JOE KELLY, I will TEAR OUT OF HERE LIKE A HURRICANE OF VENGEANCE! EPIC, HORRIBLE VENGEANCE!

Page 4

1/ The Chairman’s face.

CHAIRMAN: I have absolutely no idea. And I wouldn’t give it to you if I found it.

2/ Deadpool’s face. He’s dead serious. And very, very angry.

DEADPOOL: Her. “It” is a her. She’s my Bea.

3/ Deadpool picking up Scavenger by his throat with both hands.

DEADPOOL: Wanna know an “It” though? A REAL “It”?

4/ The Chairman, profile view, looking down, a bit worried.

DEADPOOL(OP): Your so-called “reinforced glass” is an “It”. And by “It”, I mean…

5/ Deadpool tossing Scavenger through the glass, utterly destroying it, the shattered glass is also cutting up Scavenger as he flies out.

SFX: KRSSSHH
SCAVENGER: GRRAAAHHH!!!
DEADPOOL: COMPLETELY F**KING WEAK!

Page 5

1/ Several of the men in the seats are standing up and taking out guns, a few guards are rushing in from doors and aiming guns as well. The Chairman is running out of the room.

DEADPOOL: I TOLD YOU! I TOLD YOU!!

2/ Deadpool jumping down from the cage and grabbing Scavenger, dodging bullets in the process.

SFX: BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM
DEADPOOL: YOUR GLASS SUCKS! HIRE SOMEONE COMPETENT TO INSTALL IT, NEXT TIME!
DEADPOOL: AND NOW, YOU’RE GONNA KNOW!
SCAVENGER: Oooohhh….

3/ Side view of Deadpool, holding up Scavenger as a human shield. Gunfire is coming at the two at an insane rate, Scavenger is taking all the hits.

SFX: BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM
DEADPOOL: WHEN I THROW OUT THE WORDS “EPIC” AND “VENGEANCE”, I—F**KING—MEAN IT!!!

4/ Close up on Deadpool’s hand bending Scavenger’s right arm back.

SFX: BLAM BLAM BLAM
DEADPOOL: And now Mr. Jerkwad, if you don’t mind, I need a WEAPON!
SCAVENGER: AGGHH!!

5/ Deadpool rushing toward the crowd with Scavenger as a human shield, and Scavenger’s severed right forearm out like a sword. The exposed bone out of the severed limb is sharp due to how Deadpool snapped it off.

SCAVENGER: GGGAHHHH!!!!!
DEADPOOL: EXCELSIOR!!!

Page 6

1/ Side view of Deadpool rushing at a guard. The others are visibly leaving the room. The guard is trying to fire, but he’s missed!

SFX: BLAM
DEADPOOL: This is gonna STING, dude!

2/ The guard impaled through the chest by the bone of Scavenger’s arm.

SFX: SHK
GUARD: GHGH!!

3/ Deadpool elbowing the guard in the face with one arm while taking the pistol out of the guard’s hand with the other.

SFX: WHUD
DEADPOOL: Yoink!

4/ Deadpool holding up the pistol and looking over at Scavenger, who is leaning against the wall next to the door, holding his bleeding stump.

SCAVENGER: Grgghhh….
DEADPOOL: Funny, I should totally kill you right now.

5/ Deadpool grabbing Scavenger and turning him around, putting the pistol over his shoulder.

DEADPOOL: But my comm link to Weasel got shot to hell, along with my PRECIOUS CELL PHONE, and frankly, I need a straight man to bounce off my comedy!
SCAVENGER: Grghh….

Page 7

1/ Deadpool kicking down the doors that lead into a metallic, sci-fi looking hallway. It’s mostly empty. Deadpool has Scavenger in front of him.

DEADPOOL: Plus, you’re TOTALLY gonna get shot at a LOT! If I didn’t make that clear before, with the whole bullet-shield thing. And then you’re gonna die. From being shot.
DEADPOOL: Isn’t that just hilariously awesome?
SCAVENGER: Gghh…

2/ Back view of Deadpool and Scavenger. Ahead of them are three guards running down the hall.

GUARDS: PROTECT THE MAIN ROOM!
DEADPOOL: Expositional dialogue be praised!

3/ Side view of Deadpool aiming out the pistol and firing.

SFX: BLAM BLAM BLAM
DEADPOOL: Hey guys! Look at me! I’m ripping off GEARS OF WAR! MEAT SHIELD! I didn’t even realize until JUST NOW!

4/ A guard’s head cocked back as he gets shot by Deadpool in the face.

DEADPOOL(OP): Aww! You’re too DEAD to get the reference!

5/ A guard standing next to him looking over while aiming out.

GUARD: F**K!
DEADPOOL(OP): WATCH YOUR MOUTH, MISTER!

6/ Side view of that guard, as he’s shot through the cheek by Deadpool.

SFX: GSHK
GUARD: AGGHHH!!!!

Page 8

1/ Deadpool rushing through the hall and carrying Scavenger along.

DEADPOOL: Oh I am just the WORST.
SCAVENGER: HHattte….you….

2/ Deadpool tossing Scavenger against the wall as he reaches down onto the body of a guard.

DEADPOOL: Move over, gun stealing whore! I gotta swap out!

3/ Scavenger looking at Deadpool, as Deadpool swaps his stolen gun for another.

SCAVENGER: I… am the theif…. But so… are you….
DEADPOOL: I know. It’s like, ironic and stuff.

4/ Deadpool glaring toward Scavenger.

DEADPOOL: The difference between you and me?
DEADPOOL: I’m not a whore.
SCAVENGER: That..ghhk..doesn’t….
DEADPOOL: Shaddup, ya whore.

5/ Deadpool strapping on an ammo belt with four new pistols on it, along with a grenade.

DEADPOOL: Now that I’m full on ammo, we can leave.

Page 9

1/ Deadpool and Scavenger standing in front of the end of the hall. It has a large steel set of doors in front of it.

DEADPOOL: Wowza.
SCAVENGER: Y…you’ll never…hrrk…win…
DEADPOOL: Hey, douche-whore who steals guns.

2/ Deadpool after turning Scavenger around to face him.

DEADPOOL: How do I get through that door?
SCAVENGER: Impossible…

3/ Scavenger’s face, a pistol pointed at his lower jaw, Deadpool glaring him in the eyes.

DEADPOOL: Also, where the f**k is Bea? I forgot to ask among the absolute insanity of the last few pages.
SCAVENGER: Hehh…..inside the main room…
DEADPOOL: Convenient!
SCAVENGER: They’d never look there… ghh…
DEADPOOL: Guess how I’m gonna get through that door now?

Page 10

1/ The Chairman and a few other Chairmen inside the main room, guards are pointing guns at the big set of doors. The Chairman is talking to a hologram on their main table, the one from earlier. An Engineer’s face is visible.

CHAIRMAN: IS THE JET READY YET?!
ENGINEER: It’s gonna take about ten more minutes to prep!

2/ Chairman looking over toward the doors.

SFX: WHAM
CHAIRMAN: What the…

3/ The guards looking at the door and starting to back away.

SFX: WHAM

4/ The entire room is tense, staring at the door.

SFX: WHAM

5/ Just the door.

SFX: WHAM

6/ Same shot.

SFX: WHAM

Page 11

1/ Deadpool looking down at Scavenger. Scavenger’s head isn’t there anymore. Instead there’s a splatter of red mush, bone, and brain matter. There’s blood and brain and bone all over the door as well.

DEADPOOL: Well, human-battering-ram didn’t work.

2/ Deadpool looking down at his chest to notice the grenade.

DEADPOOL: Oh, silly me! When WILL I learn?

3/ The inside of the room. The doorway is exploding, sending the doors crashing down.

SFX: BOOM

4/ Deadpool running into the room dual wielding pistols.

DEADPOOL: TA-DAAAAAA!!!!!

Page 12

1/ Deadpool jumping over a guard and shooting him in the top of the head, while aiming his other gun at another guard and shooting him in the chest.

SFX: BLAM BLAM
DEADPOOL: The following people can eat their hearts out. Ahem.

2/ Deadpool landing on the ground in a squat and aiming his crossed arms at two guards behind him, firing, shooting them both in the crotch.

SFX: BLAM BLAM
DEADPOOL: Nemesis, Deathstroke--

3/ Back view of Deadpool sitting up, looking at a guard standing in front of the Chairman.

GUARD: STAND DOWN!
DEADPOOL: -- Deadshot, Bullseye, Punisher–

4/ Deadpool aiming the guns at the guard’s face and firing.

DEADPOOL: -- Daredevil, and heck--
SFX: BLAM BLAM
DEADPOOL: EVEN BATMAN!

Page 13

1/ Splash Page/ Deadpool standing up among the carnage of the room, glaring right at the reader (Chairman).

DEADPOOL: I take that back. Batman wins.
DEADPOOL: Heya Chairman! How ya doin? This is the part where I brutally murder you! Just in case you weren’t aware.
DEADPOOL: And my definition of “brutality” doesn’t really meet up with the mainstream.

Page 14

1/ Deadpool standing directly in front of Chairman.

DEADPOOL: Yknow how I busted those doors down?
CHAIRMAN: …
DEADPOOL: C4. I remember, I always keep plenty of C4 on me. Oh, and that grenade helped too.
CHAIRMAN: But… we made sure you didn’t have any weapons before the cage…
DEADPOOL: You’re SHIELD and you didn’t check nature’s pocket?

2/ Deadpool strangling Chairman and shoving him onto the table.

DEADPOOL: Now genius, here’s where I finally get what I want. SOMEWHERE in this room, my precious Bea waits for me. I coated her in a glow in the dark material. That’s right. My lucky gun glows in the dark.
CHAIRMAN: GHHKK
DEAPOOL: Thanks, it IS pretty awesome. But that’s not the point.

3/ Deadpool glaring at Chairman.

DEADPOOL: She also has a coating of my own blood. Mixed with the glow in the dark, it caused a weird reaction. Now anytime she’s near me, she glows yellow. It’s REALLY hard to miss. And I love it, because it’s ALSO just like my little yellow boxes. She doesn’t glow all the time though, she’s got an on and off switch. Remote control. I installed it. I love it. It’s so freaking AWESOME.

CHAIRMAN: KKHHHH

4/ Deadpool glaring at the rest of the room. There are a few others left, just chairmen, standing against the wall. One of the chairmen’s pockets is glowing yellow.

DEADPOOL: Could it be…? I-I turned on the light before I came here….

5/ Deadpool snapping Chairman’s neck.

SFX: CRKK

Page 15

1/ Deadpool rushing at the chairman with the yellow glow.

DEADPOOL: HIYA!

2/ Deadpool kicking that chairman in the throat.

DEADPOOL: BYE-YA!

3/ Bea, Deadpool’s lucky gun, flying out of the chairman’s pocket and onto the floor.

NO DIALOGUE

4/ Profile view of Deadpool staring down at Bea.

DEADPOOL: …

5/ Bea on the floor, glowing yellow.

CAPTION: BEA
SUB-CAPTION: DEADPOOL’S LUCKY GUN

Page 16

1/ Deadpool holding up Bea and caressing her like a lover.

DEADPOOL: Oh darling. I missed you so.

2/ The last remaining chairmen are backed up against the wall and horrified. Deadpool is looking at them.

DEADPOOL: So, just to recap.
DEADPOOL: A huge misconception got me labeled a wanted man. You guys were out to get me, and all the while, I lost my precious baby.
DEADPOOL: But that sh*t stops here. Ya got me?

3/ Side view of Deadpool glaring at them.

DEADPOOL: Wade Wilson, AKA, Deadpool: THE UNMURDERABLE is CLEARED OF ALL CHARGES.
DEADPOOL: ….
DEADPOOL: GOT IT?!

4/ The terrified chairmen nodding.

NO DIALOGUE

5/ Deadpool smirking.

DEADPOOL: Good.
DEADPOOL: Now one of you lend me your cell phone.

6/ Close up of a cell phone’s text screen.
“HEY D00D, SET MY BOO’S ‘PORT TO HOME Papa’s back! >:D”

NO DIALOGUE

Page 17

1/ Deadpool looking at the ceiling and giving a salute.

DEADPOOL: TTYL, suckers!

2/ Same shot, Deadpool disappearing in a teleport.

NO DIALOGUE

3/ Deadpool’s apartment. Deadpool appears in the middle, battle torn and caressing Bea.

DEADPOOL: There are only so many ways I can shout “BOOYA” in my life.

4/ Weasel leaning against the doorway to his room.

WEASEL: So, how’d your one man war go?

5/ Profile view of Deadpool aiming Bea randomly with both hands, just practicing holding her again.

DEADPOOL: Swimmingly old boy, swimmingly.

Page 18

1/ Deadpool rushing toward his room.

WEASEL: Yknow, for a second there, I was worried.

2/ Deadpool walking out of his room in Spider-man pajamas with a new mask. Also a baseball cap with a picture of a shirtless Ryan Reynolds. Deadpool’s still holding Bea.

DEADPOOL: Why?
WEASEL: You dropped communication?
DEADPOOL: Maybe I just wanted to see other people.

3/ The two hanging out and sitting on the couch and chair, Deadpool turning on the TV.

WEASEL: So, it’s all wrapped up, then?
DEADPOOL: Nice and tight. Like your mother.
WEASEL: If I wasn’t used to you…
DEADPOOL: You’d get used to me. Duh.

4/ Pan out to show the entire room.

DEADPOOL: Now let’s just relax and watch some Golden Girls.
WEASEL: …Do we have to?
DEADPOOL: Dude, I just risked life and limb to save my precious baby.

Page 19

1/ Weasel looking over at Deadpool.

WEASEL: That reminds me.
DEADPOOL: Oh, do tell.
WEASEL: I had something I wanted to ask this entire time…but I thought it’d be best to wait.

2/ Deadpool looking over at Weasel, holding Bea in his hand lovingly.

DEADPOOL: No, I’m taken. Can’t you see her? She’s glowing yellow, for f**k’s sake. WHY CAN’T YOU ACCEPT OUR LOVE?!
WEASEL: …Actually I was just gonna ask you why you care about that gun so much.

3/ Side view of Deadpool glaring at Weasel.

DEADPOOL: Because she’s my LUCKY GUN!? DUH!?

4/ Profile view of Weasel.

WEASEL: You just bought her last week. And then named her Bea. And only used her on two jobs before all this.

5/ Deadpool sitting in his chair, looking astounded.

DEADPOOL: …

Page 20

1/ Splash Page/ Deadpool kicking back in his chair and manhandling the remote.

DEADPOOL: Shut up, Weasel.

THE END

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PREVIOUSLY:Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@%!" #4 - (Script)

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I MAKE NO MONEY HERE AND I OWN NONE OF THE CHARACTERS EXCEPT SCAVENGER AND THE CHAIRMEN

8 Comments

Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@%!" #4 - (Script)

RATED M

Page 1

1/ Splash Page/ Deadpool standing in front of the empty passenger plane, still holding two ridiculously large guns, which are now out of ammo. The entire runway is littered with the corpses of guards. Deadpool is tilting his head slightly as he talks to Weasel over the comm.

SFX: CLIK CLIK
DEADPOOL: Ah, ah, ah, stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive…
WEASEL: Save the disco for another time. Jeez. Wiped out the entire runway.
DEADPOOL: Years of jazzercise videos prepared me for moments like these, Weasel. Years of them.
WEASEL: You’re the mercenary Richard Simmons. My world is coming apart, Wade.
DEADPOOL: Take it back.
WEASEL: Richard Simmons.
DEADPOOL: Going from “DEADPOOL: THE UNMURDERABLE” to Richard Simmons in a week is somehow hilariously in character for me.
DEADPOOL: But enough horsef**king around. Lead the way, friend!

Page 2

1/ Back view of Weasel sitting at his console, talking to Wade. In front of him is a map of Cadneria. The size of this country is actually shockingly small. It’s the size of Manhattan.

WEASEL: Okay. The signal is leading north. Way, way north.
DEADPOOL: Excellent. I fly an empty passenger plane and entertain myself by pretending to be a captain, just so you can tell me that I landed far too south. Great.

2/ Weasel looking close at another screen, which has a satellite image of a large capital building.

WEASEL: The Cadnerian officials should be held up in the capital building. There’s a small town on the way there, and it should be on the outskirts.
DEADPOOL: Yikes. This country… it’s so…
WEASEL: Small?
DEADPOOL: I was gonna say bite-sized, but that works too.
WEASEL: Just be glad this isn’t the prison riot in Guantanamo Bay again.

3/ Deadpool standing there on the runway, looking off in the distance.

DEADPOOL: Dude, I keep telling you, I did NOT start that--
WEASEL: There’s video evidence. By the way, use your image inducer. You’ve got a squad of militia coming at you.

4/ Deadpool smirking, tossing all his big guns behind him.

DEADPOOL: I just formed a brilliant plan in my brain.
WEASEL: Oh, this is gonna be good. I’m gonna go make popcorn. Manage for a few seconds without me.

5/ Back view of Deadpool, who now looks like one of the fallen guards. He’s trying his best to look scared, like a survivor of a massacre. In front of him is an oncoming jeep full of militia.

DEADPOOL: (Sure, Weas. Please, ditch me with the angry people with guns.)
DRIVER: YOU! HALT!
DEADPOOL: Y-YES SIR!!

Page 3

1/ Side view of Deadpool, standing straight and giving a salute. His uniform is clean, not covered in blood like everyone else. A higher ranking Cadnerian officer is stepping out of the jeep. He’s got basically, all black military clothing on. No visible symbols or anything.

CADNERIAN CAPTAIN: Name and rank, soldier.
DEADPOOL: Sargent Crunch, sir.
CADNERIAN CAPTAIN: Sargent Crunch?
DEADPOOL: Used to be a Captain, sir!

2/ The Captain throwing a right hook into Deadpool’s jaw.

SFX: WHAM

3/ Deadpool fallen over, still in his disguise.

CADNERIAN CAPTAIN: Whoever the hell you are, you are NOT one of us.
CADNERIAN CAPTAIN: Get him in the jeep. Gotta take this scum to the capital. And for God’s sake, someone call the morgue and get them to work on this place!

Page 4

1/ Side view of Deadpool in his disguise, still looking like one of the other soldiers, sitting up in the jeep, surrounded by the soldiers.

DEADPOOL: Urgh… my spleen.
SOLDIER: Shut up.

2/ Disguised Deadpool glaring down at his hands, which are cuffed by somewhat regular handcuffs.

DEADPOOL: Spatula.

3/ The soldier glaring at disguised Deadpool.

SOLDIER: Hey. I said SHUT UP.
DEADPOOL: And I said spatula. Whatcha gonna do about it?

4/ The soldier slamming the end of his rifle into disguised Deadpool’s jaw.

SFX: WHAK

5/ Disguised Deadpool glaring up.

CAPTION(Deadpool): Note to self. Cadneria is not only host to whores that steal guns, but very rude soldiers, who need their spleens torn out by spatulas. On fire. While I record it, for science.
CAPTION(Deadpool): And youtube. Mostly youtube.

Page 5

1/ Overhead view of the jeep, stopped. The area is now mostly forest, the jeep being in the middle of a dirt road. The jeep is empty except for disguised Deadpool and the Cadnerian Captain.

CAPTION: REST STOP, 15 MINUTES LATER
CAPTION(Deadpool): You’re probably wondering. “Why are they speaking English if we’re in South America?” Well, I’m a multi-lingual. Really. I can ask where to go for the bathroom and everything.
CAPTION(Deadpool): I’d say that was the case…. But the only language anyone’s talked to me here so far is good ol’ English.

2/ Back view of the Cadnerian Captain.

CADNERIAN CAPTAIN: I know it’s you, Deadpool.

3/ Disguised Deadpool.

DEADPOOL: Was it that obvious?

4/ Side view of the two staring at each other.

CADNERIAN CAPTAIN: Sargent Crunch gave it away.
DEADPOOL: Funny how “master of disguise” doesn’t really mean “master of acting”.
CADNERIAN CAPTAIN: You’re neither.
DEADPOOL: Aw, now my feelings are hurt.
CADNERIAN CAPTAIN: What are you planning?
DEADPOOL: Didn’t you see my tweet? I’m planning #EpicVengeance!

5/ Cadnerian Captain, perplexed.

CADNERIAN CAPTAIN: And how do you think you’ll do that?
DEADPOOL: Easy!

6/ Same shot, but now the Captain’s face is basked in a red light.

NO DIALOGUE

Page 6

1/ Deadpool lifting his mask to show his hideously scarred face, sticking his tongue out.

DEADPOOL: OOGA BOOGA!!!
CADNERIAN CAPTAIN: AGH!!

2/ Deadpool’s hands ripping the cuffs apart.

NO DIALOGUE

3/ Deadpool’s free hand reaching for his belt buckle.

NO DIALOGUE

4/ Pan out. Deadpool is shoving his buckle onto the Cadnerian Captain’s chest! Deadpool is putting his mask back down.

DEADPOOL: Guess where YOU’RE going?
CADNERIAN CAPTAIN: WHAT—

5/ Deadpool still sitting there, but the Cadnerian Captain has disappeared. Teleported by the belt buckle.

DEADPOOL: SPACE!

6/ Deadpool looking up toward the sky, giving the sky the middle finger.

DEADPOOL: SSSSSSSPPPPPPPPPPPPAAAAAAAAAAAAAACEEEEEEE!!!!

Page 7

1/ Splash Page/ The Cadnerian Captain with Deadpool’s belt buckle floating in front of his chest. He’s in Earth orbit. Dead. His face has basically exploded. Or whatever happens to you in space without a suit.

CAPTION: SPACE
SUB-CAPTION: (SSSSSSSSSSSSSPPPPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCEEE!!!!!!)

Page 8

1/ Deadpool kicking back and pressing his ears to his comm.

DEADPOOL: Weas good buddy, that was IMPECCABLE improvisation.
WEASEL: That and you sent me a text saying “Set the ‘port for space”.
DEADPOOL: I don’t even have my phone with me.

2/ Weasel in his command center, with a visible bucket of popcorn.

WEASEL: Yes you do. It’s inside your suit so you can whip it out anytime you need--
DEADPOOL: Don’t make me say it.
WEASEL: ….
WEASEL: That’s what she said.
DEADPOOL: BURN!

3/ Same shot.

WEASEL: So, how are you gonna get to the capital now? Are those soldiers STILL on break?
DEADPOOL: Actually, they’re coming back now. Captain McDeadFace told them to leave us alone. Presumably because he didn’t want his men to start shivering in fear at my awesome might.
WEASEL: What’s this plan of yours, anyway?

4/ Profile view of Deadpool, starting to sit up.

DEADPOOL: I like to call it…

5/ Deadpool turning to face the reader. A new disguise is appearing from his image inducer, covering him and making him look like the Cadnerian Captain.

DEADPOOL: Operation “Oh, Sh*t”.
CAPTION(Deadpool): YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Page 9

1/ Disguised Deadpool standing in the jeep and looking toward the squad, who are just a few feet away, coming back.

WEASEL: You do realize that was your only teleport?
DEADPOOL: Aside from Bea, smartass. And her teleport is linked with her tracer.
WEASEL: … Wow. You really DID think this one through.
DEADPOOL: I amaze even myself sometimes.

2/ Overhead view, everyone packed back into the jeep. Disguised Deadpool is pointing north.

DEADPOOL: Onward to the capital!
DRIVER: Sir!

3/ A high tech prison cell. Scavenger is sitting on the floor. The walls are white and the floor is white.

SCAVENGER: Victor. Victor. I’ll avenge you.

4/ Profile view of Scavenger looking up.

SCAVENGER: I’ve already started it Victor. He shot you through the chest so now I’m going to tear his heart out. Taking his most precious weapon. Oh Victor. I miss you.

5/ A guard looking through a slot in the wall.

GUARD: Shut it, Scavenger. Deadpool’s been taken care of. Your plan failed.

6/ Scavenger’s eyes, glaring.

SCAVENGER: WHAT?!

Page 10

1/ Disguised Deadpool speaking into a walkie talkie connected to the jeep, as they’re still moving.

DEADPOOL: That’s right! Deadpool is terminated!
CHAIRMEN: Excellent news, soldier! Have the morgue burn his carcass immediately!

2/ Same shot.

DEADPOOL: The morgue?
CHAIRMEN: Soldier?
DEADPOOL: Right, the morgue! Apologies, sir- he got me on the noggin hard.
CHAIRMEN: No worries. Now hurry up!

3/ Same shot.

DEADPOOL: Sir, yes sir!

4/ Disguised Deadpool looking down at a soldier sitting next to the driver.

DEADPOOL: Soldier, pop quiz!
SOLDIER: Sir?
DEADPOOL: Why does this country have only ONE MORGUE, soldier? No one references “The local morgue”. Just “THE MORGUE”. TELL WHY, SOLDIER.

5/ The soldier telling.

SOLDIER: Because Cadneria only has one morgue sir, there isn’t need for another, sir!
DEADPOOL: And that’s BECAUSE OF WHAT, SOLDIER? IS CADNERIA A COUNTRY, OR NOT!?

Page 11

1/ Side view, the soldier facing Disguised Deadpool.

SOLDIER: NO SIR, CADNERIA IS NOT A REAL COUNTRY, SIR.
DEADPOOL: AND EXPLAIN WHY.
SOLDIER: MAY I ASK WHY, SIR?

2/ Disguised Deadpool aiming a pistol down at the soldier’s head. A large capital building is visible in the background of the area the Jeep is headed.

DEADPOOL: BECAUSE I WANT MY SOLDIERS INFORMATION CRYSTAL AND PRECISE IN THEIR HEADS. I WANT MY SOLDIERS TO KNOW EVERY DETAIL OF EVERY DETAIL THAT THEY KNOW. BEST WAY IS REPETITION.
DEADPOOL: NOW—START—TALKING!!!

3/ Disguised Deadpool looking over.

DRIVER: SIR! We’re here!
DEADPOOL: … We’re done here, soldier.

Page 12

1/ Deadpool’s disguise bursting off with a flash of light, he’s jumping out of the jeep and flipping in the air, tossing active grenades behind him.

DEADPOOL: YOU GUYS WERE ALRIGHT, YKNOW!
CAPTION(Deadpool): Screw getting info from the feebs. Get it from the big wigs!

2/ Deadpool landing on one knee, with the jeep violently exploding behind him.

SFX: BOOOM
DEADPOOL: TA-DAAAAA!!!
DEADPOOL: (Whores.)

3/ The chairmen sitting inside at the command center, glaring at a security screen coming from the central hologram. It’s a view of Deadpool running toward the capital building.

CHAIRMAN: DAMMIT. GET THEM READY! HE CAN’T MAKE IT HERE!
CHAIRMAN 2: THE JETS WON’T EVEN BE READY FOR ANOTHER--
CHAIRMAN: I KNOW!!

4/ Closer up on the hologram of Deadpool.

CHAIRMAN: INCAPACITATE HIM!!

Page 13

1/ Back view of Deadpool running up some cliché capital steps.

DEADPOOL: So, apparently, this place is TOTALLY FAKE, WEASEL!
WEASEL: I was there.
DEADPOOL: Shut the f**k up.

2/ Same view, except now two UNPDS robots are blocking the way to the main doors. These robots aren’t so hilariously labeled as the ones from the United Nations, though.

DEADPOOL: Shinnola.
UNPDS 1: STAND DOWN, DEADPOOL.
DEADPOOL: Why would I?

3/ Front view of Deadpool, now brandishing twin katanas in an X shape.

DEADPOOL: This is the FUN part!

4/ The inside of the chairmen’s room, they’re watching the hologram. The image shows a close up of the blade of Deadpool’s katana.

SFX: SHINK

5/ Deadpool standing on a toppled UNPDS bot, the katana going through the face, and blood clearly leaking out. He’s holding his other katana up proudly, pretty much posing. The other bot is rushing at him.

DEADPOOL: Sending these poor, stupid soldiers to their DOOM against me?! Why, Cadneria! YOU CADS!

Page 14

1/ Deadpool is ambushed from behind by the UNPDS bot, tackling into him.

DEADPOOL: SURPRISEBUTTSEX

2/ The UNPDS bot slamming down HARD into the ground down below the stairs, kicking up some debris.

SFX: WHAM

3/ Closer up on the UNPDS’s back.

NO DIALOGUE

4/ Same shot. Except now Deadpool’s katana is bursting up, covered with blood.

SFX: SHINK
CAPTION(Deadpool): “SNIKT” can kiss my mutilated ass. “SHINK” is the new “BAMF”, baby.

Page 15

1/ The front of the bot, Deadpool squirming his way out.

DEADPOOL: Awkwardawkwardawkward…

2/ Profile view of Deadpool looking up.

DEADPOOL: …

3/ The front of the bot, Deadpool is prone, having just crawled out. And now he’s surrounded by Cadnerian soldiers, all aiming weapons at him.

DEADPOOL: Crap on a stick.

Page 16

1/ The chairmen’s inner room. The hologram shows Deadpool’s face.

CHAIRMAN: FIRE! OPEN FIRE!!!

2/ Close up of the barrels of the guns.

NO DIALOGUE

3/ Deadpool’s eyes.

CAPTION(Deadpool): That awkward moment when I realize that I still totally have a healing factor. Which, of course, doesn’t negate pain.

Page 17

1/ Splash Page/ Deadpool as he’s being shot at by the firing squad, his body exploding with blood.

SFX: BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BRAKA BRAKA BRAKA BLAM BLAM BLAM

Page 18

1/ Splash Page/ Black.

Page 19 And Page 20

1/ Double Spread/ There’s a large, see-through cage. It’s rectangular shaped. Inside, we can see Deadpool on the right, and Scavenger on the left. Deadpool is just waking up, his costume torn to shreds, and looking toward Scavenger. Scavenger is smiling.

DEADPOOL: ….
DEADPOOL: YOU.
SCAVENGER: The name is Scavenger. How nice to finally introduce myself.
DEADPOOL: GUN.
DEADPOOL: STEALING.
DEADPOOL: WHORE.

--

TO BE CONTINUED:Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@%!" #5 - (FINALE, Script)

PREVIOUSLY: Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@%!" #3 - (Script)

--

I INVENTED ALL THE CHARACTERS HERE EXCEPT FOR DEADPOOL AND WEASEL, BASICALLY. I MAKE NO MONEY OFF OF THIS.

4 Comments

Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@%!" #3 - (Script)

Page 1

RATED M

1/ The inside of a dimly lit office. Sitting at a desk is a heavily shadowed figure. Underboss, who’s figure won’t be revealed here. Standing in front of the desk is Slaughter.

CAPTION: THE CENTRAL OFFICE OF THE CENTRAL BAR WITH NO NAME
UNDERBOSS: Fisk is moving in on our master’s operation.

2/ Slaughter, tilting his head.

SLAUGHTER: Oh, really?

3/ Underboss, still very heavily shadowed/obscured. On the desk, there’s a yellow envelope.

CAPTION: UNDERBOSS
UNDERBOSS: Your instructions are on the desk. I’ll give you a hint. You’ll love it.
SLAUGHTER: I doubt it.

4/ Close up on the yellow envelope.

UNDERBOSS: I know you’re not very patient. I know you’re sick of waiting for him. Sick of playing ball.
SLAUGHTER: You know me so well.
UNDERBOSS: But did ya hear? Overboss bit the bullet. The plasma pistol factory got wiped out. It won’t be long before he busts down our doors, guns blazing.

5/ Slaughter’s hand, grabbing the yellow envelope.

SLAUGTHER: I can’t f**king wait.

Page 2

1/ Side view of Slaughter exiting the office. The outside has a big, red door. The area Slaughter is in now has red and gold decorations. It’s a luxurious place.

NO DIALOGUE

2/ Pan out. Slaughter is walking down the hallway, passing by an LMD dressed up in a pinstripe suit (an LMD without a face, similar to the LMD SHIELD agent from the ending of World War Symbiote).

NO DIALOGUE

3/ Pan out more. Slaughter is walking past the LMD, we can see him from outside of a window.

NO DIALOGUE

4/ Pan out more. Slaughter, as it turns out, is inside the top of a building about 20 stories tall.

CAPTION: CORPORATE HQ OF MANAGEMENT CONTROL INC

Page 3

1/ Slaughter standing in front of a large, silver set of double doors (they resemble elevator doors). There’s a number pad on the wall next to them on the right.

NO DIALOGUE

2/ Close up on the number pad, Slaughter pressing in the keys.

SFX: BEET DET BEET

3/ Back view of Slaughter as the doors open like a set of elevator doors, pulling into the walls. The inside of the room is very clearly a weapons cache, filled with ridiculous amounts of large weaponry and the like.

NO DIALOGUE

Page 4

1/ Overhead view of a street, a black car moving down.

CAPTION(Slaughter): I hate taking orders.

2/ The black car parking.

CAPTION(Slaughter): I hate listening to people. I hate people. I hate everything.

3/ Slaughter stepping out of the driver’s seat, in his black trenchcoat from last issue.

CAPTION(Slaughter): But for those rare times when my job involves gunning down an entire street… well, I can’t help but love it. Fisk’s drug dealers taking up space, using it as a cover to try and monitor the bars. Idiots.

4/ Weasel sitting in his control chair, with all the monitors. He’s talking to Deadpool.

WEASEL: Okay Wade, he’s here. He’s been given orders to wipe out the street.
DEADPOOL: I’m busy getting a taco.
WEASEL: WADE.
DEADPOOL: TACO.
WEASEL: …How many people are in line ahead of you?
DEADPOOL: Just one.
WEASEL: Go ahead and get the taco then. But watch out for Slaughter. Remember what we have to do?

5/ Deadpool in his fat hobo disguise, throwing his hands up in the air as if he’s talking to Weasel in person, waiting after a guy in line.

DEADPOOL: OF COURSE! SHOOT HIM IN THE BODY WITH MY AWESOME ROCKET LAUNCHER!

6/ The guy ahead of Fat-Hobo-Deadpool in line has turned around and is looking at him, a bit nervous, considering there’s a possibly crazy man standing behind him that’s twice his size.

GUY IN LINE: …Are you okay?
DEADPOOL: …Bowties are cool.
GUY IN LINE: …O-okay then.
WEASEL: I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. Seriously.

Page 5

1/ Slaughter walking down the street.

DEADPOOL(OP): FEAR NOT, CITIZENS!
SLAUGHTER: The hell?

2/ Front view of Deadpool, his fat hobo disguise vanishing in a flash of light as he holds the rocket launcher in his hand.

DEADPOOL: THE MASSACRE OF THE TACO STAND WILL BE AVENGED!

3/ Close up on Slaughter, pulling out a pistol and starting to run.

SLAUGHTER: HOW DID YOU KNOW?!

4/ The explosion from last issue where Slaughter is, gore bursting out from the fire.

SFX: BRROOOSHH

Page 6

1/ Splash Page/ Black page.

NO DIALOGUE

Page 7

1/ Black panel.

CAPTION(Slaughter): I can feel again.

2/ Black panel.

CAPTION(Slaughter): Everything’s starting to…fix itself…

3/ Black panel.

CAPTION(Slaughter): It’s slower than last time. No. No no no. Can’t lose my healing. Can’t.

4/ Black panel.

CAPTION(Slaughter): Come on come on come on come on…

5/ Blurry vision of a florescent light.

CAPTION(Slaughter): Good…good…

Page 8

1/ Close up on a photograph of Slaughter, standing and reaching for a pistol.

DEADPOOL: This guy. He’s Slaughter.

2/ Close up on a photograph of a large explosion.

DEADPOOL: Still Slaughter. But he’s met his new best friend, “giant raging fireball of doom”.

3/ Close up on a photograph of Slaughter’s charred remains, splattered on the street.

DEADPOOL: And that’s Slaughter’s charred remains!
DEADPOOL: So, Mr. Employer.

Page 9

1/ Deadpool and The Employer (who is still shadowed), sitting in a bar at a booth.

DEADPOOL: I can haz reward moneyz?

2/ The Employer shifting the photos around with his hand, carefully inspecting each.

THE EMPLOYER: …Sniff.
DEADPOOL: Uh…
THE EMPLOYER: Thank God…
DEADPOOL: Well, I AM pretty awesome, but I wouldn’t go that far.

3/ Profile view of The Employer, shifting forward, his face coming out of the shadows. He’s an old man, smiling with tears running down his face.

THE EMPLOYER: Thank you. Thank you so much.

4/ Deadpool sitting there. Not really knowing what to feel.

DEADPOOL: Um…you’re welcome.

5/ Profile view of Deadpool.

DEADPOOL: So, uh, cash? Cash money? Chitty chitty bang bang? Ka-ching? Ding-wang-doodle?

Page 10

1/ The Employer is putting a briefcase on the table.

THE EMPLOYER: You know why I asked you to kill him?
DEADPOOL: I’m gonna guess because you wanted him dead.
THE EMPLOYER: Right.

2/ The Employer opening the briefcase, filled with cash.

THE EMPLOYER: That, and he’s my son.
DEADPOOL: OH MY GOD THAT IS SUCH A HUGE TWIST.
DEADPOOL: I TOTALLY CARE ABOUT THAT ALMOST AS MUCH AS MY AMAZING REWARD! DO GO ON, SIR.

3/ Side view of the two just talking as The Employer still has the briefcase in his hands.

THE EMPLOYER: I’m Charlie. Charlie Goodwin.
DEADPOOL: Pool. Deadpool.
THE EMPLOYER: We’re acquainted.
DEADPOOL: Sorry. I’m a sucker for Bond references. Please go on. I’ll just be drooling over my money.
THE EMPLOYER: I thought he’d come back from ‘Nam a war hero, you know.
THE EMPLOYER: I thought a lot of things. It’s a miracle I’ve even lived this long. But I know why.
DEADPOOL: Please, do tell.
DEADPOOL: (Oh, Benjamin Franklin. You made sure to have your good side put on that bill, didn’t you?)

4/ Same shot, but The Employer is moving the briefcase over to Deadpool. Deadpool is clearly focusing on the money.

THE EMPLOYER: He killed our entire family when he came back. I went into hiding. Old and feeble. Do you know how old I am, Deadpool?
DEADPOOL: Old enough to know where babies come from, I assume.
THE EMPLOYER: He killed everyone, Deadpool. He wanted to kill everything. But you stopped him. I never thought to hire an assassin before. But after that horrible attack on the city…I felt I could risk it. I had survived an assault from those horrible machines.
DEADPOOL: (
♪) Money money… MONEY! (♪)

5/ The Employer, looking down at the table.

THE EMPLOYER: I think I can finally die with dignity now. Now that he’s gone. I can finally rest.
DEADPOOL: Your honor restored, mister samurai?
THE EMPLOYER: …Yes.

Page 11

1/ Deadpool standing up, still behind the table. He’s got the briefcase by the handle.

DEADPOOL: Well, that’s just fine and dandy.
DEADPOOL: But some GUN STEALING WHORE stole my lucky gun, and your IDIOT SON framed me for an assault on the free world.

2/ Deadpool looking down at The Employer.

DEADPOOL: So, I guess I got some dignity of my own to get back. It’s been fun, though. We should do this again sometime. Possibly over a burning building or a space station. These things never work out like we plan anyway.
DEADPOOL: But really. I’m leaving now.

3/ The Employer sitting at the table as Deadpool vanishes with his teleport.

DEADPOOL: Hasta la pasta!

4/ The Employer sitting there, motionless. Residue from Deadpool’s teleport still there.

NO DIALOGUE

5/ Front view of the empty seat in front of The Employer. Slaughter is standing there, about to sit.

SLAUGHTER: Look who it is.

Page 12

1/ Side view of the two. Slaughter looking at his father, shoving a pistol in his face. Slaughter has his mask on.

SLAUGHTER: I heard the whole thing.
SLAUGHTER: You really f**ked things up for me.

2/ Same shot.

SLAUGHTER: They found a weird little GPS tracker on my corpse. I read the files the mortician made after I killed him. Musta thrown it at me during the UN ordeal. That’s how Deadpool tracked me. And he tracked me, because you wanted me dead. Didn’t you?

3/ Same shot.

SLAUGHTER: …Of course. Of course you’re dead. You died the second Deadpool left, didn’t you? I would have interrupted…but because of you…things aren’t exactly working right anymore for me.

4/ Back view of Slaughter, taking his mask off. His face isn’t visible.

SLAUGHTER: See what you did? You idiot. You f**king idiot.

5/ Slaughter turned around, putting his mask on. His face isn’t visible.

SLAUGHTER: Hate you. Hate them all.

Page 13

1/ Slaughter is standing by the door of the bar.

SLAUGHTER: I’m gonna give you a funeral pyre here, you old windbag.

2/ Slaughter hitting a paneling of wood.

SFX: BEET

3/ The wood panel slides back to reveal a number code.

SLAUGHTER: All the bars have this, y’know. Hostages are very important.

4/ Front view of Slaughter punching in some number codes, The Employer’s corpse rests in the booth behind him.

SFX: BEET DET BEET

5/ Slaughter walking out of the bar as it explodes in a hellish fireball.

SFX: THROOOOOMMM
SLAUGHTER: Rest in peace.

Page 14

1/ The inside of a Cadnerian bunker. It’s all silver/chrome colored, very high tech stuff. There’s a round table with several Cadnerian representatives. Scavenger is standing up, in a seat at the table. Scavenger has large, techy handcuffs around his wrists and down his hands. Around the table are several monitors and the center of the table has a large, blue half-sphere at the center (to project holograms so they can discuss data and whatnot).

CAPTION: CADNERIAN HQ
SCAVENGER: Gentlemen, I have something important to say.

2/ One of the seated men looking over.

CHAIRMAN: What is it now?

3/ Scavenger looking over at him.

SCAVENGER: Recently, I went to New York as ordered, to ensure the safety of our Cadnerian “ambassador”.
CHAIRMAN: And you failed MISERABLY.
SCAVENGER: Correct. But I can fix it.

Page 15

1/ Splash Page/ Scavenger pointing at the blue half-sphere, and a red image of DEADPOOL appearing. Deadpool looks very angry.

SCAVENGER: Deadpool’s on his way to Cadneria.
CHAIRMAN: WHAT?!

Page 16

1/ The same image as Page 15, but now a Twitter feed is visibly showing. “IAMDEADPOOL2” is on the screen. The Tweet reads “I’M COMING FOR YOU CADNERIA, YOU GUN STEALING WHORES!!!! #EpicVengeance”.

SCAVENGER: He killed our “ambassador”. Now, I can fix it, by killing him when he gets here.
CHAIRMAN: Why didn’t you just kill him in America, you idiot?!

2/ Profile view of Scavenger.

SCAVENGER: Because, he outmatched me. But here, at my “home”, we can use our army to take him down.

3/ Profile view of the chairman, looking over angrily.

CHAIRMAN: YOU LURED HIM HERE?!

4/ Scavenger looking over at the Chairman.

SCAVENGER: Yup.
CHAIRMAN: …You planned this. We captured you and now you’ve--
SCAVENGER: You’re going to have to use them anyway eventually. See, that gun had a trace on it. A trace only Deadpool could track. His friend made it that way. The one I stole. I’ve hidden it in this bunker. I can’t teleport out of here without your permission, of course. So, either you let me go, or you face Deadpool.

5/ The chairman with his hands folded up, glaring down at the table.

CHAIRMAN: …
CHAIRMAN: Everyone, let’s start up the war protocol. Deadpool’s on his way.
CHAIRMAN: And FIND THAT GUN.

6/ Two armed guards have grabbed Scavenger and are escorting him away from the table while he laughs.

SCAVENGER: THIS IS PERFECT! HAHAA!!

Page 17

1/ The chairman looking toward the others.

CHAIRMAN: Go to all the trouble of hypnotizing our own agents to believe themselves from another government for the press, convince everyone at the UN to play along.
CHAIRMAN: Had to play along when we hired Triple Lead to try to genuinely get Deadpool out of the picture. Then SHIELD. And then SHIELD FAILED. That was EMBARASSING.

2/ Another chairman looking toward him.

CHAIRMAN 2: So, we wipe out Deadpool with our army and execute Scavenger, then?
CHAIRMAN: Of course. We SHOULD execute Scavenger first… but on the off chance that Deadpool wins, and we escape…

3/ Same shot.

CHAIRMAN: Leave him alive. If Deadpool wins, I want Scavenger to endure what he’s got coming.
CHAIRMAN 2: You’re honestly prepared for THAT? It’s just Deadpool.

Page 18

1/ Black panel.

CHAIRMAN: That’s why I’m preparing for it. Because it’s JUST DEADPOOL.

2/ A big passenger airplane, soaring through the sky on schedule.

CAPTION: CADNERIAN AIRSPACE
DEADPOOL: Okay folks, we’re uhm...‘bout to land in Cadneria’s only airport. And it wasn’t built for passenger planes.

3/ The plane landing on the strip, any personnel visible are confused and armed.

NO DIALOGUE

Page 19

1/ Armed guards surround the plane.

GUARD LEADER: STEP OUT OF THE PLANE, OR WE’LL BLOW IT UP.

2/ The back ramp of the plane is lowering.

NO DIALOGUE

3/ Close up on the back ramp. A HUGE pile of guns and ammo is falling out.

DEADPOOL: Alright, alright. You caught me.

Page 20

1/ Splash Page/ Deadpool walking down the ramp, armed to the teeth and holding two very large guns, which he’s firing at the guards with, and doing a damn good job, blowing most of them away.

SFX: BUDDA BUDDA BUDDA BRAKA BRAKA BUDDA BUDDA BRAKA BRAKA
DEADPOOL: AND NOW I GET TO SHOOT YOU ALL IN THE FACE!

--

TO BE CONTINUED: Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@%!" #4 - (Script)

PREVIOUSLY: Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@&!" #2 - (Script)

--

I MAKE NO MONEY OFF OF THIS. I INVENTED LITERALLY EVERY CHARACTER HERE BUT DEADPOOL AND WEASEL (SHIELD IS OBVIOUSLY NOT MINE AS WELL).

3 Comments

Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@&!" #2 - (Script)

RATED M

--

Page 1

1/ Deadpool rushing at the reader with his twin katanas slicing down.

CAPTION(Deadpool): I know what you’re thinking.
CAPTION(Deadpool): “Wade, why haven’t you bothered to tell “The Employer” that you were duped out of your kill?”

2/ Side view. Deadpool’s katanas are being blocked by Triple Lead’s tail, which has straightened out and formed across his chest.

SFX: CHNK
CAPTION(Deadpool): If you weren’t, you better be now. Because otherwise, you wouldn’t understand this next part.
TRIPLE LEAD: YOU’RE USELESS!

3/ Same view, but Triple Lead’s tail is pushing back Deadpool’s katanas and throwing his arms back (DP still has the katanas in his grip).

TRIPLE LEAD: IDIOT!
DEADPOOL: OOOH! I KNOW THIS! “WORDS THAT DESCRIBE TRIPLE LEAD”, RIGHT?!
CAPTION(Deadpool): His friggin tail keeps blocking my blades of awesome! It must be the strongest part of his armor! I didn’t even need expositional dialogue to figure that out! THAT’S HOW OBVIOUS IT IS!

Page 2

1/ Back view of Weasel running toward his room.

WEASEL: TAKE IT OUTSIDE, WADE!!
DEADPOOL(OP): ROGER!

2/ Front view of Weasel inside his room. He’s grabbed a silver orb off of his desk, and he’s looking at it.

WEASEL: Room code 2981! Arm the place!

3/ Weasel looking at his room’s door. A silver coating is covering it, almost like liquid metal.

WEASEL: Emergency ANTI-PENETRATOR armor, now!
WEASEL: (Note to self: change that name. Sentimentality is overrated.)

4/ Weasel looking down at himself. The orb is covering him the same way, forming a similar substance that’s starting to cover his arm. At the same time, Weasel is shouting at Wade via their comm link, pressing his finger to his ear.

WEASEL: Wade, do you read?
DEADPOOL: Loud’n clear, good buddy!

5/ Weasel’s anti-penetrator armor is up. He looks like a mix of The Destroyer armor from Thor, and Molten Man.

WEASEL: Got an incoming transmission, Wade. It’s from The Employer. Patching ya through.
DEADPOOL: Aww, but I was SO looking forward to not having to explain myself!
WEASEL: Just deal with it!

Page 3

1/ Outside view of Deadpool and Weasel’s apartment, leading to an alley and a lower building below. Deadpool is kicking Triple Lead out of the window, Triple Lead is firing up at Deadpool with all three pistols. Deadpool is now talking to The Employer via comm link.

SFX: KRRSSSHH
SFX: BLAM BLAM BLAM
DEADPOOL: CRIKEY!
THE EMPLOYER: ‘Pool! Why is Slaughter NOT DEAD?!
TRIPLE LEAD: ARGGHHH!!!

2/ A big view of the entire outside. Triple Lead is just about to smash into a rooftop next to Deadpool’s apartment, Deadpool is falling after him and blocking any gunshots with his katanas.

THE EMPLOYER: DEADPOOL!?
DEADPOOL: Dude, he GOT AWAY! And probably FRAMED ME!
DEADPOOL: I decided to NOT talk about it for a while and just chill for a night! It’s not every day I fail miserably--
WEASEL: Well--
DEADPOOL: WEASEL.
WEASEL: Go on.

3/ Both Deadpool and Triple Lead are standing up on the rooftop.

DEADPOOL: Anyway, Employer, I’ll handle Slaughter in a bit. Someone’s got hired to off me.
TRIPLE LEAD: Who’re you TALKING TO!?
DEADPOOL: …. WAIT, EMPLOYER, WAS IT--
THE EMPLOYER: NO! It wasn’t me, you imbecile! Look, kill Slaughter in three days or your money is OUT OF THE WINDOW!
CAPTION(Deadpool): I’d get him out of my hair by telling him that Slaughter obviously didn’t cause that lil mini-holocaust everyone’s so worked up about….but I like money.
DEADPOOL: I forgot, how much was that?
THE EMPLOYER: How did you FORGET?!
DEADPOOL: Because THIS JERKWAD IS FIGHTING ME!
THE EMPLOYER: Five million!
DEADPOOL: Oooo la laa!

4/ Back view of Triple Lead. Deadpool is running at him.

DEADPOOL: It’s a deal!
THE EMPLOYER: And watch out for SHIELD, they’re coming for you.
DEADPOOL: Gotcha!
THE EMPLOYER: Then I’m out!
WEASEL: Okay, he left, finish the job already!

Page 4

1/ Deadpool trying to slice his swords at Triple Lead, but being blocked by his tail again.

SFX: CHK
TRIPLE LEAD: This trick NEVER fails!
DEADPOOL: EAT MY SHORTS!

2/ Side view of the two. Triple Lead’s aiming his two free hands at Deadpool’s chest and firing.

SFX: BLAM BLAM
DEADPOOL: GGHK

3/ Deadpool backing off from Triple Lead, grabbing his chest, trying to look really injured.

DEADPOOL: Agh… you have… wounded me, sir….
TRIPLE LEAD: No way it’s THAT easy. I KNOW of you! You are DEADPOOL! The unmurderable!
DEADPOOL: (I’m stealing that name).
DEADPOOL: No, seriously… coff…you’ve won.
DEADPOOL: (Weas, grab my third katana.)
WEASEL: Why--
DEADPOOL: (Do it).

4/ Deadpool’s face, smiling.

DEADPOOL: CODE WEASEL: GO!
CAPTION(Deadpool): Weasel’s emergency ‘port code. I couldn’t’a done this part without him. What a guy. What a pal.

Page 5

1/ Weasel (still in his armor) is behind Triple Lead and shoving a katana through his chest from behind.

SFX: GHSKT
WEASEL: DAMMIT, WADE!
CAPTION(Deadpool): Wait, what? “Dammit, Wade”?
TRIPLE LEAD: GAHH!!

2/ Profile view of Deadpool.

DEADPOOL: Thanks for the save, pal!

3/ Profile view of Weasel, glaring down.

WEASEL: You made me kill him for you.
DEADPOOL(OP): Relax dude. I couldn’t get him from the front. ‘DAT TAIL ruined things.

4/ Same view of Weasel, looking up, his armor’s face peeling back a bit. He’s smirking.

WEASEL: “DAT TAIL”?
DEADPOOL(OP): Yeah. DAT TAIL.
WEASEL: If you weren’t such a---
DEADPOOL(OP): Hilariously quirky and/or loveable rascal?
WEASEL: --We would not be friends.

5/ Front view of Deadpool grabbing Triple Lead’s legs.

DEADPOOL: Aww, shaddup. And help me dump the body.
WEASEL(OP): Where?
DEADPOOL: I figured the dumpster behind the kinky porn-hub would figure. I could even make a collage of hentai mags and shove it down his throat. Yknow, like a parting gift?
WEASEL(OP): You’re sick.
DEADPOOL: And you’re a good friend. SO MOVE IT!

Page 6

1/ The two of them, Weasel (still in his armor) and Deadpool, dragging Triple Lead through an alley, back on ground level.

TRIPLE LEAD: GHK… I AM… STILL ALIVE… you idiots…
DEADPOOL: I can fix that. I watch a lot of Dr. Phil.
WEASEL: He does.
DEADPOOL: The man is a master of torture.
WEASEL: He actually thinks that.
TRIPLE LEAD: GAH…. How could…. YOU… have killed our glorious… ambassador…
DEADPOOL: Pop rocks and a red bull. You have no idea.

2/ Profile view of Triple Lead, blood dripping down his lips as he tries to talk.

TRIPLE LEAD: I am just… one of many…. Cadneria has declared WAR on you, Deadpool…

3/ Profile view of Deadpool, looking down at Triple Lead.

DEADPOOL: REALLY? That’s so SUPER-INTERESTING.

4/ Profile view of Deadpool, looking up and at Weasel.

DEADPOOL: Isn’t that just SUPER-INTERESTING, Weasel?
WEASEL: Actually Wade, that could turn out to be a problem.
DEADPOOL: A SUPER-INTERESTING problem.
TRIPLE LEAD(OP): Ghk… hate you…

5/ Deadpool looking over his shoulder, purple neon lights are flashing.

DEADPOOL: And here we are! The TOMB OF TRIPLE LEAD!
TRIPLE LEAD(OP): Hhate…

Page 7

1/ Triple Lead’s body stuffed inside a dumpster, his mouth forced open slightly, with various rolled up magazines sticking out.

CAPTION: FIVE VERY UNPLEASANT MINUTES LATER
WEASEL(OP): Jeez, Wade.
DEADPOOL(OP): You knew I wasn’t kidding.
WEASEL(OP): But you used furry mags.
DEADPOOL(OP): Are you saying there’s a problem with you and furries? He HAD A TAIL. It was so obvious that he was a furry.
WEASEL(OP): I guess. But did you have to stuff a chimichanga down there too?
DEADPOOL(OP): I’m the master of stuffery.

2/ Deadpool and Weasel walking away from the dumpster.

DEADPOOL: And now, let’s create a mental checklist!
DEADPOOL: Number one: Kill Slaughter!
WEASEL: And be sure to have photographic evidence and send it to The Employer.
DEADPOOL: Good, good.

3/ Profile view of Deadpool, glaring with anger.

DEADPOOL: Number two: Get the fuzz off of us.
WEASEL(OP): SHIELD is REALLY gonna come after us?
DEADPOOL: Indubitably.
WEASEL(OP): How are we gonna manage that?

4/ Deadpool looking over at Weasel.

DEADPOOL: Wiping out Cadneria’s hilariously ineffective yet bloodthirsty government, of course!
WEASEL: But that’ll just make things more difficult!
DEADPOOL: Because I wasn’t wanted by dozens of governments BEFORE, right?
WEASEL: …
WEASEL: Good point.
DEADPOOL: Besides, who knows! After I wipe out Cadneria, they might be revealed to be SECRET SUPERVILLAINS! Therefore redeeming my dirty, dirty name!
WEASEL: I really doubt that’s gonna happen.

5/ Back view of Deadpool and Weasel, walking through the alley.

DEADPOOL: Come on. It might.
WEASEL: I really doubt it.
DEADPOOL: But I WANT it to!
WEASEL: Sigh.

Page 8

1/ Deadpool walking into the front door of their apartment.

DEADPOOL: Anyways, number three: RESCUE BEA!
DEADPOOL: The most important step of all, by the way.

2/ Weasel walking in after Deadpool, his armor is melting away and returning to the form of an orb in his hand.

WEASEL: I’ll check the trace. It’ll take 24 hours though, I started checking while you were fighting Triple Lead. He went a long way.
DEADPOOL: So, in the meantime, I can murder Slaughter?

3/ Weasel looking over at Deadpool.

WEASEL: Uh… yeah, actually.
DEADPOOL: Don’t you love how it all fits together into a convenient schedule?
WEASEL: That’s creepy.
DEADPOOL: It’s almost like a series of plot points.
WEASEL: Stop it.

Page 9

1/ The inside of a large stakeout van. It’s got computer monitors lined up on the walls, and it can fit 7 men, (all of whom are in attendance). Three on each side, sitting on chairs that are built into the wall, they are all looking at their standard monitors. The monitors are emitting a red light that’s covering everyone. Agent Way, the head officer, has brown, spiky hair and a regular build, along with the regular SHIELD outfit. The rest all have the standard SHIELD outfits.

CAPTION: D.EADPOOL I.NTERROGATION/C.APTURE/K.ILL S.QUAD
SUB-CAPTION: DANNY WAY, AGENT OF SHIELD, COMMANDING “HEAD” OFFICER
AGENT WAY: Alright, did we trace the teleportation signal?

2/ The three agents on the left, looking toward their screens.

AGENT WAY(OP): We’ll need it to find him. Even though his image inducer can make him a master of disguise, it’s only visual. He still acts … eccentric enough to spot in a crowd.
AGENT 3: Sir. We have a lock.

3/ Agent Way looking toward the Agent who’s talking.

AGENT WAY: Good! Where?
AGENT 3: Um….

4/ The highly disguised SHIELD van, in the form of just a regular big van, with a taco stand right next to it. A ridiculously fat hobo is standing in the front of the line, looking at a taco in his hands.

AGENT 3: Here. Literally right outside.
FAT HOBO: I saw horrible things in that attack the other day man. I saw guys like you, hardworking tacos, just tossed aside.
TACO STAND ATTENDANT: Sir, if I could please ask you to stop talking to the food….
FAT HOBO: Hush now, my pretty. Everything will be alright. I’ll take you to a warm, special place.
TACO STAND ATTENDANT: Sir.

5/ Fat Hobo walking away from the taco stand and down the street, gorging his face.

FAT HOBO: GSHHITTASTESLIKEFREEDOMMMHHSSHHKK
AGENT 3: What do we do, sir?
AGENT WAY: We take action, right now.

6/ The Fat Hobo disguise bursts away in a flash of red light, revealing Deadpool to be holding a giant rocket launcher while shoving the rest of the taco in his face with his free hand.

DEADPOOL: FEAR NOT, CITIZENS!
AGENT 3: SIR! SECURITY CAM SHOWS VISUAL!

Page 10

1/ Back view of Deadpool, he’s aiming at a New Yorker who’s in a black trenchcoat, who’s looking visibly alarmed.

DEADPOOL: THE MASSACRE OF THE TACO STAND WILL BE AVENGED!
CAPTION(Deadpool): Sure, I know Slaughter didn’t ACTUALLY murder all of those innocent tacos. But I’m pretty sure I’ll never know who did it anyway.
SLAUGHTER: HOW DID YOU KNOW?!
AGENT WAY: MOVE! MOVE! MOVE!

2/ Same view, Deadpool firing at Slaughter.

CAPTION(Deadpool): Live day by day, that’s how I roll, baby.

3/ Overhead view of the entire area. Slaughter’s standing position is covered in a large explosion.

AGENT WAY: WEAPONS READY! GO GO GO!!
DEADPOOL: Weas, did you get the pics from my super-smexy mask cam?

4/ Weasel in casual wear inside, talking to Deadpool over his comm, sitting at his monitor chair back at the apartment.

WEASEL: Yeah Wade. Employer didn’t give us an email of course, we’ll have to deliver these in person. Feel free to just go.
DEADPOOL: You sound nervous.
WEASEL: You’re gonna be covered in SHIELD agents in a few seconds.
DEADPOOL: I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about.
SFX: BLAM BLAM
DEADPOOL: SH*T! SH*T! I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT!
DEADPOOL: BEAM ME UP, SCOTTY!

5/ Weasel shouting at the monitors.

WEASEL: WHY?! JUST FIGHT THEM!
DEADPOOL: YO, DINGUS, I DIDN’T BRING ANYTHING OTHER THAN MY SEXY ROCKET LAUNCHER.
WEASEL: WHY THE HELL NOT!?
DEADPOOL: BECAUSE MY FAT HOBO DISGUISE ONLY HAD ENOUGH ROOM FOR A ROCKET LAUNCHER!!! THAT AND I DIDN’T REALLY NEED ANYTHING ELSE, UNTIL NOW, YOU B*TCH!!!
DEADPOOL: SERIOUSLY! PORT ME! NOW!

6/ Profile view of Weasel, facepalming in distress.

WEASEL: I can’t.
DEADPOOL: WHAT!?
WEASEL: They’ve got an anti-transport field in that van. You’re gonna have to get at least six blocks away before I can--
DEADPOOL: I’m totally fine.

Page 11

1/ Weasel, looking up.

WEASEL: What?

2/ Close up on Deadpool, he’s smirking, and covered in blood.

DEADPOOL: I. Am. Totally. Fine.
WEASEL: B-but… but…
DEADPOOL: Wow. I REALLY had you going, huh?

3/ Pan out to show that Deadpool is standing on top of six dead SHIELD agents, a bit battle scarred (maybe three bullet wounds on his chest/sides, but nothing too serious for him) and holding Way by the throat with his spare hand. He’s on the sidewalk, civvies have fled the area.

DEADPOOL: You ACTUALLY thought I’d have trouble with these simps?
WEASEL: H-how did you--
DEADPOOL: Plastic spoon.
WEASEL: … from the taco stand?
DEADPOOL: You have no idea how deadly those things are. Combined with my natural agility and kung-fu mastery, they were NO MATCH, WEASEL-SAN.
AGENT WAY: Ghkkk…
WEASEL: You’re lying. Where are they keeping you?
DEADPOOL: Shut up and get ready to record from my belt. You put microphones there, along with the port device, right?
WEASEL: Yeah.

Page 12

1/ Side view of Deadpool walking down the street, carrying Agent Way over his shoulder, whistling to the tune of “House Of 1,000 Corpses” by Rob Zombie, just casually.

DEADPOOL:
(♪)

AGENT WAY: Ghk….God….where are you… me… taking…

2/ The interior view of a dark warehouse, Deadpool kicking the door open. Now he’s whistling “So Happy Together”.

DEADPOOL:
(♪)

AGENT WAY: Ribs…myribs….
DEADPOOL: Did you get the joke?
AGENT WAY: Wh-wha?

3/ Deadpool sitting Agent Way down into a cold, metal chair.

DEADPOOL: I’m whistling in a format that doesn’t allow for people to naturally hear it.
AGENT WAY: Ghkk…
DEADPOOL: You totally didn’t get it.
DEADPOOL: Philistine.

Page 13

1/ Black panel.

CAPTION(Weasel): For some reason, there’s been a popular idea going around like a virus. The idea that Deadpool isn’t deadly. The idea that he’s a clown. A non-threatening clown. Not the kind he is.

2/ Black panel.

CAPTION(Weasel): He won’t say it to anyone but me, when he’s half drunk and depressed out of his mind. It makes him very, very angry.
CAPTION(Weasel): By the way, for someone like Deadpool – with an advanced healing factor – to get drunk, it takes a lot of alcohol. A lot.
CAPTION(Weasel): It was a bucket full of vodka that did the job last time. He said he wants to buy and renovate a jacuzzi so he can “Feel the glorious touch of inebriation all over”.

3/ Black panel, but slightly awake, Deadpool is vaguely visible and very blurry.

CAPTION(Weasel): Deadpool is one of the most horrifying men on the face of the planet. Because he can do all the things that he does, and find it hilarious. A joke. A sitcom. Hell, one time, he quadruple murdered a double agent who snuck on our side…
CAPTION(Weasel): While singing the “Full House” theme song.

4/ Blurry panel of Deadpool, visibly holding a large, metal object in his hands.

CAPTION(Weasel): The man is a broken, sharp object. And he’s been tossed around like a tennis ball across the world.
CAPTION(Weasel): He never said he wants respect. And he never will.
CAPTION(Weasel): But if you’re ever alone, and on his bad side… like this poor sap is….

Page 14

1/ Deadpool holding a crowbar, staring right at the reader with a smile on his face, showing through his mask.

DEADPOOL: Heeeey there, buddy.
DEADPOOL: How ya feelin’?
CAPTION(Weasel): I’d say “God help you”, but that wouldn’t be enough. He better call back soon.

2/ Profile view of Way, spitting up blood, with a bruised over eye.

AGENT WAY: Shkk…. The hell…

3/ Close up on the crowbar in Deadpool’s hands.

DEADPOOL: Curious about this thing? Everyone is. You’re special to see him.
DEADPOOL: (Dude, imagine if someone was just listening to that, and they had no context.)
DEADPOOL: Wanna know his name?
DEADPOOL: (Tee hee.)

4/ Profile view of Way, looking up and at Deadpool. Way’s locked into the chair by way of heavy chains.

AGENT WAY: Hrm…
DEADPOOL: It’s an awesome name I came up with.

Page 15 And Page 16

1/ Double Page Spread/ Deadpool smashing the crowbar brutally into the side of Way’s head, sending appropriate amounts of blood and teeth flying out.

SFX: WHUD
AGENT WAY: GHHHK--!!
DEADPOOL: THE CONFESSIONER!!!

Page 17

1/ Deadpool’s face, his eyes scrunched up with rage.

DEADPOOL: Here’s how it works. You CONFESS that I, Deadpool, DIDN’T go batsh*t crazy on the UN, and that, Deadpool, was FRAMED by Slaughter. Who, by the way, is a f**ked up cookie, LET ME TELL YOU.

2/ Close up of Way’s face, Deadpool is bringing his head to face the reader, so they can see eye to eye, by putting the crowbar slowly against his cheek.

DEADPOOL: I had to BLOW HIM UP WITH A ROCKET LAUNCHER.
DEADPOOL: I’m not even sure if that’ll work for long!

3/ Side view of the two.

DEADPOOL: Either you confess, or I go to Plan B.
AGENT WAY: Shkk…Aghh…

Page 18

1/ Close up of Way’s mouth, blood coming out.

AGENT WAY: Aghh….

2/ Deadpool’s eyes, questioningly raising an eyebrow under the mask.

DEADPOOL: Yeah?

3/ Side view of Way’s mouth.

AGENT WAY: Nhg…

4/ The crowbar’s bloodied end.

DEADPOOL: What was that?
AGENT WAY: Ngh..Wgh…uhgn…hgll…

5/ Way, looking up at Deadpool.

AGENT WAY: Ngh wagh…
DEADPOOL: No way in hell, I got that. Wow. Defiant. I can respect that.

Page 19

1/ Pan out. Deadpool is wailing on Agent Way’s skull with the crowbar.

DEADPOOL: R

2/ Back view of Agent Way, as he’s being thrown to the side by the force of the crowbar slamming into his skull.

DEADPOOL: E

3/ Back view of Agent Way, he’s being uppercut by the crowbar.

DEADPOOL: S

4/ Front view of Agent Way, Deadpool is slamming the crowbar into his chest.

DEADPOOL: P

5/ Overhead view of Agent Way, Deadpool is slamming the crowbar into his face again.

DEADPOOL: E

6/ View of the entire room, Deadpool still wailing on Agent Way.

DEADPOOL: C

7/ Back view of Deadpool, tossing the crowbar (now covered in blood) over his shoulder casually.

DEADPOOL: T

Page 20

1/ Splash Page/ Deadpool leaning against the wall, his finger to his comm link in his ear, Agent Way’s brutally bloodied corpse sitting in the chair, unrecognizable.

DEADPOOL: Hey, Weas. You would NOT believe the day I’m having.
WEASEL: What did you do with the SHIELD agent?
DEADPOOL: Well, I had this brilliant master plan to save myself some work. It failed miserably. So now I’m gonna have to go with the plan I told you about, which was actually my plan B all along.
DEADPOOL: After we deliver the evidence of Slaughter’s oh-so-timely demise, guess what, big pud?
DEADPOOL: We’re goin’ to WAR!
WEASEL: Good. Because I found out that the trace led straight to Cadneria. Looks like two parts of your scheme just merged.
DEADPOOL: PLOT CONVIENIENCE BE PRAISED!
CAPTION(Deadpool): Fret not, Bea. Daddy’s coming for you. Riiiight after I wipe out a country all by myself. Just another day in the life.

--

TO BE CONTINUED: Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@%!" #3 - (Script) (Blog post)

PREVIOUSLY: Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@&!" #1 - (Script)

--

I DON'T OWN ANY MARVEL CHARACTER, I INVENTED AGENT WAY AND SLAUGHTER - I MAKE NO MONEY OFF OF THIS

8 Comments

Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@&!" #1 - (Script)

RATED M

Page 1

1/Outside view of New York City, a LOT of the buildings are under re-construction due to the events of “World War Symbiote”, there are several missing, but none that’d cause too much of a panic (Empire State is fine, ETC) just the smaller ones that aren’t the true attractions. Overall, not as bad as it COULD have been, considering what the city was facing.

CAPTION(Deadpool): I love how these monologues always start. The cliché ones. The classics.
CAPTION(Deadpool): “My city.” That’s how it goes. Now, here’s the great part. The city is either a “dying whore”, OR, “I am her SPIRI--
WEASEL: DEADPOOL!
CAPTION(Deadpool): WHAT are you doing in my internal monologue?
WEASEL: You’re talking to yourself.

2/ Deadpool sitting in his (NEW) empty apartment’s living room, in his boxers (DP logo’d, obviously) and a Spider-man shaped “I <3 NEW YORK” t-shirt, along with one of those beer-sip hats. He’s playing X-Box in this over the top huge comfy chair. Weasel is visibly in the shot, looking at his friend.

DEADPOOL: ….
DEADPOOL: Don’t lie to me, Weas.

3/ Side view of the two. Deadpool is clearly concentrating on the game.

WEASEL: Seriously. You were.
DEADPOOL: …. I don’t recall.
WEASEL: BUT YOU WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT HOW--

4/ Deadpool standing up in his chair, holding his controller over his head victoriously.

DEADPOOL: BOOM! HEADSHOT!
WEASEL: Sigh.

5/ Weasel looking around.

WEASEL: Hey, Wade, listen dude, I know we might have had a falling out recently, or whatever--
DEADPOOL(OP): Ah-cha-cha. Don’t.

6/ Weasel looking perplexed.

WEASEL: What?

Page 2

1/ Deadpool slipping the lower half of his merc suit on. Back view of Weasel looking around.

DEADPOOL: We did NOT have a falling out.
WEASEL: Yes we did. You got me kicked out of my job in Vegas, and--

2/ Side view. Deadpool glaring at Weasel as he tosses his beer-sip hat off.

DEADPOOL: That didn’t happen.
WEASEL: YES IT DID!!!
DEADPOOL: Did not. We never became enemies. After Cable died, we parted ways, and now I’ve called you back to help me out. Like the good ol’ days when Joe was in charge of me. The other Joe. Not the current Joe.
WEASEL: But that’s not true. Also, that’s really--
DEADPOOL: Vague? Yeah. Deal with it.

3/ Deadpool putting on the top of his merc outfit. Weasel walking toward an open door, which leads to his room.

DEADPOOL: Honestly, it’s ME. Can’t you live with a LITTLE bit of vague continuity?
WEASEL: Yeah Wade. Sure.

4/ Weasel in his room, it’s cluttered with all kinds of weapons tech and computer junk. He’s standing over his bed, which has a large rifle on it, and a standard glock pistol next to it.

DEADPOOL(OP): Dude, is Bea ready?

5/ Weasel looking down at the two guns.

CAPTION(under the pistol): BEA.
SUB-CAPTION: DEADPOOL’S LUCKY GUN.
WEASEL: Yup!

Page 3

1/ The United Nations at night.

CAPTION: THE UNITED NATIONS BUILDING
CAPTION(Slaughter): The city burned for a whole day.
CAPTION(Slaughter): The world was going to be at war.

2/ The inside, all the delegates hard at work, discussing, arguing, etc.

CAPTION(Slaughter): Humanity was attacked. Those freakish symbiote androids with weapons for arms. Man, that was fun.

3/ The outside of the UN building. Slaughter is standing there in a black with white pinstripes business suit, he’s all trimmed up and nice, holding a black briefcase.

CAPTION(Slaughter): I only wish that I could have found The Punisher in the wreckage. That would have been a nice climax. Killing him in the midst of a brand new world war.

4/ Profile view of Slaughter.

CAPTION(Slaughter): It would have been perfect.

5/ Front view of Slaughter. Another businessman is standing next to him. He’s pale and just a regular guy.

REGULAR GUY: Whatcha thinkin’ about?
SLAUGHTER: Nothing. Back off.
REGULAR GUY: See, I would. But I know who you are. I know what’s in that briefcase. Good plan. Sneak in, kick the hell out of the guards, and blow up the delegates. Then heal and watch the chaos. That’s brilliant, dude. Seriously.
REGULAR GUY: That also pretty much proves that you didn’t do the whole war thing. Seeing as you wouldn’t bother with this otherwise.
REGULAR GUY: (I knew I was Batman.)
CAPTION(Slaughter): Oh, for the love of…

Page 4

1/ The disguise vanishes in a brilliant red poof, as Deadpool stabs a katana through Slaughter’s shoulder.

SFX: VOOSH
DEADPOOL: BANZAAAAAAIIII!!!
SFX: GSHK
SLAUGHTER: F**K!!!!

2/ Side view of the two. Deadpool has ripped the katana out of Slaughter’s shoulder, and Slaughter is holding a pistol up and facing Deadpool, firing off.

SFX: BLAM BLAM
SLAUGHTER: WHO HIRED YOU!?

3/ Back view of Slaughter. Deadpool is dodging the bullets, rushing to his left to avoid them. Deadpool now has his lucky pistol out, and he’s firing back.

DEADPOOL: CARMEN SANDIEGO!
SFX: BLAM BLAM

4/ Pan out to show the two fighting. Slaughter is also avoiding the gunshots, still holding the briefcase.

SFX: BLAM BLAM
OP: In this time of desperation and fear…

5/ Close up of the top of the UN building. A shadowed figure with a hooded trenchcoat with ragged edges watches through binoculars that glow green. He’s called Scavenger.

SCAVENGER: Out of all the times. With the entire city doubting itself. The heroes cleaning up. The rebuilding.
SCAVENGER: Of ALL the times, Deadpool shows up now.

6/ Close up on Scavenger’s binoculars.

SCAVENGER: Just f**king great.

Page 5

1/ Back view of Slaughter running toward the UN building, still holding the suitcase.

SLAUGHTER: YOU’RE NOT STOPPIN’ ME!!

2/ Profile view of Deadpool holding up “Bea”.

DEADPOOL: Au, contraire.
CAPTION(Deadpool): Crap. I’ve been hanging around Fantomex too much.

3/ The inside of the UN building, a fat man in a suit with thick black hair is walking towards the front doors.

CAPTION(Deadpool): And now, ladies and gents, let me introduce you to our proverbial Franz Ferdinand.

4/ Close up on the man. He’s got a heavy mustache as well. He looks like a total fatcat.

CAPTION: VICTOR VON LOON
SUB-CAPTION: AMBASSADOR OF CADNERIA
CAPTION(Deadpool): Yeah, you WISH I was making that name up. His mom was a Dr. Doom fangirl. Go figure.
CAPTION(Deadpool): This fatcat is from a new lil’ country that just recently formed in South America. Cadneria. Guess what they are? They’re Cads. Proud, righteous CADS. Isn’t that awesome? Think of waking up every day and saying the pledge of CAD-LEGIENCE!

5/ Back view of Slaughter, who is just in front of the front doors. Victor is visible through the glass. Slaughter is moving out of the way of the bullet, throwing himself to the left, seeing it coming by turning his head.

SLAUGHTER: HA!

Page 6

1/ Back view of Victor, looking shocked as the glass partially erupts in front of him in slow motion.

SFX: BSHHKT
VICTOR: WHAT THE--

2/ Side view of the bullet flying through open air.

NO DIALOGUE

3/ Profile view of Victor’s fat face as he looks down, mouth agape, shouting.

NO DIALOGUE

4/ Deadpool’s face, eyes wide.

DEADPOOL: Oh, sh*t.

5/ Overhead view of Victor. He’s fallen on his back, bleeding out of his chest.

CAPTION(Deadpool): Shot through the heart, and I’M to blame!
CAPTION(Deadpool): Yeah I GIVE LOVE A BAD NA- … I’m a terrible person. I love realizing these things.

6/ Slaughter looking at Deadpool. Deadpool’s looking irritated, Slaughter’s amused.

SLAUGHTER: Nice work. Lethal kill and it wasn’t even at the right target.
DEADPOOL: SHUT UP! It’s not MY fault I’m so over-the-top FANTASTIC!

Page 7

1/ Pan out to show a view of the entire entrance area. Scavenger is watching from afar, this is from his perspective but we can see him just a bit. Still shadowed mostly. How he got from the UN roof to here is a mystery.

SCAVENGER: No…Victor…

2/ Side view of Deadpool and Slaughter. Slaughter is tossing the briefcase at Deadpool and running.

SLAUGHTER: Have fun!
DEADPOOL: HEY!

3/ Close up of Slaughter holding up a Mysterio hologram orb while sprinting.

DEADPOOL(OP): GET BACK HERE!

4/ Back view of Deadpool shouting at Slaughter, holding the briefcase in his hand. Except where Slaughter was, there’s a little cloud of smoke.

DEADPOOL: YOU—YOU CAD!!
UNITED NATIONS PEACEKEEPING DEFENSE SQUAD (UNPDS)(OP): WADE WILSON, AKA, DEADPOOL, TURN AROUND.

5/ Deadpool turning his head around.

DEADPOOL: This is SOOO not what it looks like.

Page 8

1/ Back view of Deadpool. There’s an entire UN peacekeeping soldier squad, (from Venom #1) staring at him, standing outside the entrance. As if they just dropped out of the sky with an alarm triggered. The one speaking has a bigger suit than the others, and it’s more decorated.

UNPDS LEADER: You’ve declared war not only on the FREE WORLD but on the newly formed nation of Cadneria. An alarm was triggered when you decided to shoot up the place. You’ll be taken in for crimes against humanity.
DEADPOOL: You want a crime against humanity? Look in a mirror. Jeez. I’ve seen “PIMP MY RIDE” but “PIMP MY IRON MAN”?

2/ Deadpool, pressing his finger to his ear and talking to Weasel over the comm.

DEADPOOL: Hey Weas! Mind saving my ass?
WEASEL: Only if you pay for the pizza tonight.
DEADPOOL: JESUS CHRIST, WEASEL. THIS IS NOT THE TIME.

3/ Weasel in a high tech room with monitors all around glowing, he’s kicking back in a big techy chair in casual pajama wear, talking to DP via comm link.

WEASEL: Wade, you’d do the same thing in my position.
DEADPOOL: ….
DEADPOOL: This is true.
DEADPOOL: I admire your cunning.
WEASEL: Pizza?
DEADPOOL: Pizza.

4/ The UNPDS aiming their arms out at Deadpool, high tech canons forming out of their arms.

UNPDS LEADER: HE’S ATTEMTPING TRANSPORT!

5/ Deadpool doing a “TALK TO THE HAND” pose as he fades away, teleporting.

DEADPOOL: I didn’t kill the Cad dude, just FYI.
DEADPOOL: Toodles!

Page 9

1/ Deadpool appearing in his living room.

DEADPOOL: I got away scott free. I…. I feel fantastic. The THRILL of it all!
DEADPOOL: ….
DEADPOOL: Must. Resist. Charlie Sheen. Reference.

2/ Weasel walking out of his room, tossing DP the cell phone.

WEASEL: Go ahead.
DEADPOOL: But it’s so…. SEVERAL MONTHS AGO!
WEASEL: Do it or order the pizza now.
DEADPOOL: WINNING. EPIC WINNING.

3/ Weasel taking a seat on the couch and grabbing the remote, Deadpool facepalming out of frustration.

DEADPOOL: WINNING!!
WEASEL: It’s a disease.
DEADPOOL: That I got from your mother. When I rode her like the majestic buffalo she is.
WEASEL: Order the damn pizza.

4/ The inside of a UN ambassador’s office. There are several officials surrounding an open laptop.

DEADPOOL(OP): Hello, I’d like two large pepperonis. With extra FORESHADOWING, please?
CAPTION: UNITED NATIONS, TWO HOURS LATER
LAPTOP: You make this vengeance SWIFT and GLORIOUS. UNDERSTOOD?
OFFICIAL 1: We’ve already called the most efficient mercenary. Born and bred Cadnerian, via our genetic engineering program.
LAPTOP: Good. See to it that Deadpool dies.

Page 10

1/ The outside of Deadpool’s apartment, downstairs. A pizza guy is walking down a path and toward the stairs.

SCAVENGER: Hey.

2/ The pizza guy turning around. Average joe, nothing special about him.

PIZZA GUY: Hello?
SCAVENGER: Hey.

3/ Back view of the pizza guy looking toward darkness. Scavenger’s eyes are there, glowing red.

SCAVENGER: I like pizza.

4/ Profile view of the pizza guy. Scavenger is stabbing a large knife through his forehead.

SFX: SHHK

Page 11

1/ Deadpool and Weasel playing X-box. It’s totally friendly and shockingly normal behavior for them.

DEADPOOL: DUDE LOOK AT THAT! LOOK OVER THERE!
WEASEL: SHUT UP!
DEADPOOL: IS MY CLEVER DISTRACTION TECHNIQUE WORKING?! BECAUSE I’M SICK OF YOU RESPAWNING. DIE. DIE RESPAWN. DIE.
WEASEL: You need anger management.
DEADPOOL: SHUT UP AND DIE ALREADY!!!!

2/ Deadpool sitting up in his chair, his eyes wide.

SFX: BING BONG
DEADPOOL: IT BEGINS.
WEASEL(OP): ‘Bout time.

3/ Side view of Deadpool walking toward the door.

DEADPOOL: I lost all my money in Vietnam, by the way. Paying for JUSTICE.
WEASEL(OP): Gonna have to try harder.
DEADPOOL: I store all my cash inside my bowels, and last week I was abducted by aliens, who then anally probed me and stole it.
WEASEL(OP): Bravo. But you’re still paying.

4/ Back view of Deadpool facing the door.

DEADPOOL: Rassumfrassumrespawnwhoremakingmepayforpizza.

5/ Back view of Scavenger standing at the door with a gun pointed at Deadpool’s face.

DEADPOOL: …

6/ Back view of Deadpool, turning his head.

DEADPOOL: Hey Weas, it’s ANOTHER would-be assassin!
WEASEL(OP): Kick his ass and see if he hurt the pizza guy!
DEADPOOL: You think he STOLE our pizza?!
WEASEL(OP): Would you if you were on his job?
DEADPOOL: ….
DEADPOOL: My God.

Page 12

1/ Side view of Deadpool staring the pistol in the face.

DEADPOOL: I REALLY hope you didn’t steal our pizza.
SCAVENGER(OP): Got no use for it. It’s downstairs in the pizza boy’s dead hands.
DEADPOOL: Really? Oh, cool. I was worried that I’d have to be extra brutal. I’m kinda tired.

2/ Pan out to show Scavenger’s wrist getting grabbed by Deadpool’s hand.

DEADPOOL: Ever had one of those days, where you just don’t wanna get outta bed?
SCAVENGER: GHRR!!

3/ Deadpool yanking Scavenger into the apartment and smashing his face into the floor. Scavenger’s fully exposed form is of a man covered by his brown, hooded trenchcoat (with rigged edges), and a mask with just two red, small, circle eyes. Aside from that, he’s just wearing a bulletproof vest and some cheap black pants and boots.

SFX: WHAM
DEADPOOL: YOINK!

Page 13

1/ Deadpool looking up and OP.

DEADPOOL: Weas! Toss me Bea!

2/ Weasel tossing Bea at OP.

WEASEL: Take it outside!

3/ Close up of Deadpool’s hand catching Bea perfectly.

DEADPOOL: Yeah, yeah!

4/ Underfoot view of Deadpool shoving Bea’s barrel into Scavenger’s head.

DEADPOOL: So, who sent you? Those UN goons?
SCAVENGER: No…. that’s….
DEADPOOL: That’s what?
SCAVENGER: That’s the gun that killed Victor.
DEADPOOL: Your point being?

Page 14

1/ Scavenger’s hand grabbing Bea by the barrel.

DEADPOOL: HEY!
SCAVENGER: Yknow, I was originally just gonna swipe Slaughter’s briefcase…

2/ Pan out to show Scavenger disappearing, teleporting like Deadpool was, still holding Bea, which is also disappearing.

DEADPOOL: HEY! HEY!!!!
SCAVENGER: This’ll do.
DEADPOOL: OH GOD, NO! BEA!!!

3/ Same view. Scavenger is gone. Deadpool’s just sitting there awkwardly.

DEADPOOL: …

Page 15

1/ Deadpool sitting there still. Weasel is trying to walk up to him.

WEASEL: Wade?

2/ Deadpool’s still the same. Weasel is sitting next to him.

WEASEL: Wade… listen, man, I can run a trace. We’ll find him.

3/ Same shot.

DEADPOOL: I lost her again.
WEASEL: ….

Page 16

1/ Deadpool looking at Weasel.

DEADPOOL: That’s twice now.

2/ Focus on just Deadpool looking down.

DEADPOOL: My precious Bea Arthur… he stole her.
DEADPOOL: That…. that GUN STEALING WHORE.

3/ Same shot.

WEASEL(OP): Wade…
DEADPOOL: What?

Page 171/Splash page/ Back view of Deadpool and Weasel, looking up. A newcomer stands in the doorway. He’s wearing a green battlesuit, sort of like the armor that Scorpion wears, and he has a tail that’s holding a pistol. The tail is really thin, not at all like Scorpion’s tail. It’s like an arm’s width. He’s also holding two pistols.

DEADPOOL: Look at that, Weas.

WEASEL: Hm?

DEADPOOL: Something for me to stab and make me feel better.

NEWCOMER: The name’s TRIPLE LEAD. You’re about to find out why.

WEASEL: The newbies are always so horrible with names.

Page 18

1/ Side view. Deadpool uppercutting Triple Lead’s jaw. Weasel is running off in the background.

SFX: WHAK

DEADPOOL: You’re telling me!

TRIPLE LEAD: GH!!

2/ Close up of Triple Lead’s tail, the pistol firing off a shot.

SFX: BLAM

TRIPLE LEAD: FOR THE HONOR OF CADNERIA!!

3/ Deadpool stumbling back, shot to the gut.

SFX: GSHK

DEADPOOL: YGH…

4/ Deadpool turning around to face Weasel, who’s tossing him his twin katanas, holstered.

WEASEL: Catch!

DEADPOOL: Wokka wokka.

Page 19 and 20

1/ Double Page Spread/ Deadpool holding his unsheathed twin katanas in hand, facing Triple Lead, who’s holding up his pistols in a similar manner.

TRIPLE LEAD: Today, Deadpool, you DIE!
DEADPOOL: You have fun thinking that. I’m just gonna LOBOTOMIZE ya while you keep talkin.

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TO BE CONTINUED: Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@&!" #2 - (Script)

PREVIOUSLY: The Prelude to "Deadpool: Operation "Oh, S#@%!"" - (Script)

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I DON'T GET PAID FOR THIS, I INVENTED VICTOR VON LOON, SCAVENGER, TRIPLE LEAD, AND CADNERIA - ALONG WITH WORLD WAR SYMBIOTE.

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