I am Gumflabica. Champion of the Special Ed room, bringer of the end of sanity times. I will rule over my kingdom with indifferance, and say hello to everybody I kill. If you can understand my mad ramblings, then you, my friend, are a greater king than I.
I own the Titanic, it's in my bathtub. Floating in the gin, rusted into dust. I may be super, but I'm no transvestite. I'll go up, but not away. Gumflabica takes his victims with him, back to the nest, where you will be regurgitated and fed to MySpace users, the scourge of the internet.
When i bleed from my nose, I bleed from my tomato. The book is lies, the cover is truth. The words are shiny, and distracting, but it is distracting me away from nonsense, and showing me what must be known to truly understand the pancake that it this ocean of egg wites.
I like my yolks hard. I said that around an egg one time, then I greased it up and gulped it down. Sexy breakfast time. Sometimes I scream for my mother, but all that ever comes is a horrible tentacle monster. Gumflabica is your king, and you must obey. His orders are those of free will, and if you do not obey, he will create a paradox to absorb us all into Limbo. In Jamaca.
If you do not go to Jamaca, he will go back in time, and kill your parents, preventing you from being born, which will cause him to not go back in the future, so you would be born, pushing him to go back and create a duplicate universe, stuck in a loop. When all the space is taken up, the multi-verse will implode on your master, and the universe will become Gumflabica.
I am the multi-verse. I am me, you, and Everything. Obey.