Battalion

Battalion : Hello everybody ! Welcome back to WCJS Radio catchy theme song plays on the background Today, we're going to celebrate Orpheus's birthday ! Happy birthday Orpheus, we got the news from your two trusty servants Bob and Steve ! Who's now here on the radio station... bickering ensues Stop fighting and get over here !

Steve : Okay... okay... jeez

Bob : That guy is creepy

Battalion : They're here to sing the Happy Birthday song ! So Orpheus... be ready to cover your ears.

Steve and Bob : 

Happy.... birthday.... dear Orpheus

You shall take over the world... 

Don't be afraid of him just because his devious

He's an awesome guy......

He's the richest man on earth... !

But he's the nicest man in hell... !

He has an ego the size Perth.. !

And he's a stinky bun who smells.. !

Oh we may hate you....

But this universe's not the same without you......

sniffs, claps, whistles, and tears erupted from the crowds.

Portrait : Wow....

Battalion : Agreed.

Portrait : Better than Mortality's

Battalion : Agreed.

Zem appeared out of nowhere

Zem : Better than me ? Surely not !

Shattering window was heard and zem was thrown out of the six story building.

Battalion : Uh-hm.... now we have Orpheus on the line. 

Beep....

Battalion : Orpheus ?

Premonition : WHERE'S BOB AND STEVE ?!

Steve and Bob : Here we are sir !

Premonition : You buffoons, today is not my birthday !

Bob : Really ? Are you sure... ?

Steve : Our sources told us it is your birthday today !

Premonition : And who is this source of yours ?

Bob : The squirrel...

Squirrel : Chip chip chip chip

Premonition : I'll kill you later.

Beep....

Battalion : Ookay... now its time for our ads !

SUPER BRICK ! Kids love em ! SUPER BRICK !

Portrait : What the hell was that ?!

Staff : Super brick is awesome ! It does absolutely nothing but it can do anything !

Portrait : That doesn't make any sense

Staff : Or is it... ?

Portrait : Stop being cryptic

fight ensues 

Battalion : Okay next up is our favorite, most lovable, not huggable star. Starheart !. Come on in Starheart.

Starheart : You humans are useless.

Battalion : Yes, yes we know that. Now.. tell us about yourself Starheart.

Starheart : A Few Billion Years Ago

Battalion : Ooh... this sounds exciting

Portrait : Shush..

Starheart :

A Few Billion Years Ago 

The star Sirius B formed. For a few million years it did what all stars do, combusting elements into other elements. Then, one day, it spontaneously gained sentience. Conferring with other sentient stars, it created an avatar to explore the universe. This was in the form of the Starheart, which adapted to look like the dominant species. It gained knowledge of thousands of planets, and through the telepathic link sent it back to the star Sirius B.

Battalion : Cool. That's one more thing that NASA don't know about !

Portrait : What do you think of Earth... ?

Starheart : Harmless.

Battalion : Is that all ?

Starheart : Mostly harmless. Now I must go. A kid nearby is eating an Ice Cream and Sirius B wants me to gain as much intel on this Ice Cream of yours. So goodbye !

an explosion occurs and Starheart flew out through the ceiling

Portrait : We may need to fix that.

Battalion : Yup. So that's all for today folks. We conclude today's edition of WCJS

1. Deathstroke
2. Dr. Doom
3. Nightcrawler
4. Falcon
5. Multiple Man
6. Immortal Man in Darkness
7. Alan Scott
8. Riddler
9. Hush
10. The Atom
11. Deadpool
12. Rip Hunter
13. Morph
14. Weasel
15. Calculator
16. Multiplex
17. Dr. Hurt
18. Shade
19. Bullseye
20. Daredevil
    

Posted ! We're heading to the beach !

Battalion tapped his watch repeatedly to make it start moving again, cursing and mumbling each time he fails. " Fu*k. Stupid watch ! " He yelled through gritted teeth, as the watch's needles starts to move uncontrollably. " This thing is mocking me. " The outer glass of the watch cracked open, revealing the machinery beneath it. " I'm gonna kill you and your stupid family you useless timepiece " He scowled, peering at Portrait for a moment, then back to his watch again. The reason for his recent anger is because life has been stressful for him lately. He went thought mission after mission relentlessly. No rest, no vacations, until now. The watch on Battalion's wrist was still not working, he might as well buy a new one on the way, so..... " Useless thing " He threw the watch out to the street, and began to talk to Portrait. Little did he realize that the watch he just threw, was working again.

" So is this everybody ?! " Battalion spun around to check, " If I call out your name, I want you to say aye okay ? " he promptly asked, wondering if the others had actually heard him, oh well... . " Alright, let's begin. Album. Barbie. Bob and Steve. Premonition. Portrait. Salamander. Io. Black Ar-- " Battalion's words were cut off, when a figure appeared out of nowhere outside his window. " Sh!t " He gasped, his heart was beating like a drum. " Oh it's just Archer " Battalion said in relief, opening the window with a click of a button. " Hey guys I'm here. Are we ready to go or what ? " Archer ordered the deer next to him to go, that guy keeps getting weirder and weirder. " Right on time buddy, take a seat near Bob and Steve if you want. " Battalion pointed to the far back seats of the van, where Bob and Steve was sitting. " Bob is wearing the green jumpsuit, while Steve is wearing the yellow one " He whispered, making sure that Archer doesn't get the wrong seat. " Anyways... do you want to say anything before we go ? " Battalion smiled at him. Weird, one minute he's angry like crazy, and now he's smiling. " Whats up my friends... this is quiet the party we have here and whats with the new guys, one of them had an afro... THATS AWESOME !. I also feel some very interesting Auras.... I think that women's aura over there might be golden, thats very rare. Hmm.... have to guess she might be the most attractive one here... other than you Portrait of course *cough* " Archer chattering ended, and Battalion took a deep breath. This is gonna be a long one.

" Well... this is not actually a party, but if you want to call it that, that's fine, whatever makes you happy. And about the new guys, well they're not actually new. We invited them to join our road trip, you know, to make it more fun. The afro guy is called Afro Man by the way, obviously. Oh... and the interesting aura woman is Barbie. " Battalion briskly answered. Panting with his tongue sticking out of his mouth, he was holding his breath. " Hah... hah... now if you don't mind, hah... please take a seat. " He closed the window rudely, clicked a button, and the back door slid shut after Archer had entered the van. " Let's continue... again if I call out your name say aye ! Archer. Afro Man. Sir Night. Riddick ? " Battalion shifted his eyes back and forth, checking every corner of the back using the rear-view mirror. " Where the hell is Riddick ?! " A punt came from above, and Battalion rushed out to check. " Oh there you are.. Riddick. If you want to sit there it's fine, and just for a heads up. We're going to move out " He winked beneath the sunglasses, clicked his tongue, and went back to the driver's seat. " Alright people our first destination is..... THE BEACH. Barbie... I want you to navigate the map " Battalion gave Barbie the map, knowing that she doesn't know how to navigate it, he smirked. " ROAD TRIP " He pushed the gas forward, letting the roar of the engine to echo, and the wheels of glory to screech. A few seconds later, they were already on the road going wild. 

I'm allergic to Shrimps, Lobsters, and Crabs ( Each time I ate it, my lips swelled up )

Saving Private Ryan, Full Metal Jacket, and Hamburger Hill

Posted

Battalion sat quietly in the back seat of an old armored van, looking down at his callous hands as if something was disturbing him. " Hey man, you okay ? " The clone in the front seat asked him worriedly, he had been watching him from the rearview mirror for quite awhile. " Oh.. yeah-yeah... don't worry about it. " Battalion replied stuttering, letting out a fake smile before he went back looking down at his hands. The clone of course didn't believe him, but there's no point finding out is there ?, so he just smiled and went back to his seat.

The hot air that breezed around them was unbearable, they were all sweating crazily, and was on the brink of dehydration. Good thing for them though, the judge had provided them with a box full of mineral water, which they opened and ransacked. The drink that was inside the box was still cold, and the chill that got out of it was like a dream. " Okay people... we can only get one.... and only one.. " The driver said in a whispering voice, glaring each one of them with distrust on his face. " Oh... what the heck ! " The driver grabbed three of the refreshing water and opened it all. The others soon followed, and splashed the water everywhere as they drank like crazy maniacs. After, when their thirst had faded. They realized, that the van was getting soggy because of them. " It's all your fault you know. You drank like savages. " The driver mocked the clone scornfully, and turned his face away from him. " Hey. You're the one who drank three bottles, half of them was spilled if you didn't notice. " The clone pointed angrily at the driver, he was beginning to feel irritated. Meanwhile, at the back of the argument. Battalion noticed that they had arrived, and patted the two clones repeatedly. " We've arrived " He pointed out the windshield window, where an old abandoned gas station barely stood upon them

The van drifted into a complete stop near a dried out bush, and everybody inside went out to open the trunk. " Well lookie here. " Battalion smirked by the sight of gadgets, it was making him a little bit nostalgic. " Just like the old days, huh ?. "The clone said from behind him, putting its right hand on Battalion's shoulder. " Alright... that's enough talk !. " The other clone ( who's also the driver ), scolded them. " This is no time to chatter. Now, moving on. " The driver grabbed a rectangle shaped device from the trunk. It has a set of buttons, all of em written in numbers. There are two antennas hanging at both sides of the gadget, it also has a blue screen, which is wide enough for you to see through it. " This here. Is the E.T " Battalion and the clone laughed, " E.T ? seriously ? " The clone asked, he was still laughing. " Yes.. the E.T. Also known as, the Electronic Tapper. It could tap into any computer, or other electronical device in a matter of seconds. You're gonna use this to hack their security system "  The driver lends it to the clone, in which he responded " Cool... ". The driver then pulled out another weird gadget, it's round shaped and has a blue orb that glows inside it. " This one is the EMP I told you about. You're gonna use this as soon as you reached the front of the gas station. " He explained, giving the device to Battalion after. " And the last one is these. " He shows the two, two pairs of high tech goggles. " These are the sight enhancer. It has night vision. Heat sensors. And sonar goggles. " He gave them one each, " Now go " He waved his hand as a signal for them to leave. And so they did, but Battalion managed to look back and asked " What are you gonna do ? ". " I'm the getaway driver, just call me through the communication device I planted in your mask. " The driver said, giving him a thumbs up.

In a matter of seconds, the two Battalions reached their destination. " This is B1 we have reached our position " His voice echoed through the com link, " Alright B1, proceed to your next step. " a voice came back at him, and Battalion nodded. He threw the EMP away, and took cover. The EMP exploded into a blue wave, turning off the lights and all the electronical devices ( including their gadgets ) in the gas station, ( government secret base ) but only for a while. " Now's our chance " The two Battalions ran, ran like they never ran before. Going passed the deactivated cameras, and into the shop that's located in the corner of the gas station. Inside, they were puzzled for a moment. " Where's the entrance to the underground tunnels ? " B2 ( the clone ) asked, " Turn on your sonar goggles, it's already working. Maybe we could find something. " B1 ( Battalion ) and B2 turned it on. All the people below them, and all the lights that shined was glowing in a dim white light. " We found something alright " B2 pointed his hand towards the cashier, where a big button was glowing in a dim white light through their goggles. " Open the secret entrance then. We only have a few seconds before the camera went on again " B1 ordered, hurrying B2 to push the button. And as soon as he pushed it, the walls slid to the side, screeching. It showed them a gate to the abyss. It was dark, and the sound of pleading could be heard. " P-please it's so c-cold " a muffled sound came from below. B1 and B2 cautiously went down the paved stairs, clenching their fist for safety. " From here we go our separate ways " B1 whispered as he leaned on the gray walls, peeking slightly to spot the enemy. " Roger that " B2 said his goodbyes and went into the opposite direction from where B1 was standing.

Battalion rolled to the side, an enemy holding a flashlight was going to past through him in 3... 2... 1... POW, Battalion smacked his fist straight to that guard's skull. Knocking him unconscious, before dragging him into a dark place. " Moving on " Battalion stealthly went through all the guards and hidden cameras undetected, like a ninja and that guy from the video game Sam Fishman... or something. Sooner or later he was going to reach the prison area, and he was right. He arrived shortly after thinking about it. " Portrait " He whispered from the shadows, pointing at the guards in front of him. He needs them distracted, and so Portrait did just so. Creating a chance for Battalion to knock them out, BAM POW THWACK they were all knocked out, and Battalion went towards Portrait's cell " Don't worry, I'll free you and the others " He turned away for a moment, to contact his clone who's probably already tapping the security system by now. " How long ? " Battalion asked immediately as soon as the com link was turned on, " Five seconds. " the clone replied from the other side of the com link. " Good " Battalion turned around, and the cell gates were suddenly open. He was surprised to see many familiar faces, Icarus, Portrait. and that Metropolitan guy from the news. One cell was empty though, wonder who's cell was it. " Icarus or.. er... Julius, I know your going to search for your suit, so I'll tell you where it is. " " The armory " A voice came from the com link " It's in the armory. Now as for the others who don't have a ride, you guys can follow me. " Battalion ordered them with a waving hand, asking them to follow. They were already halfway, when suddenly BANG a sound was heard from the com link and Battalion halted the march. " B2 what happened ? " no answer " B2 what happened ?! " still no answer " B2 ! B2 ! Damn it " he gritted his teeth in anger and was going to find out what happened. But then, the alarm went on. " Red alert ! Red alert ! The prisoners have escaped, I repeat the prisoners have escaped ! " Battalion and the others was possibly panicking under the bleeping red lights, but they all realized if they run, they will possibly make it. So they did, they ran like a prey. Running from all the hunters, until they reached the safezone which is the van. The van had already crashed into the wall of the shop in the surface, and was honking repeatedly to make them hurry. " ALRIGHT EVERYBODY GET IN " The driver opened the back, letting all of them in. Once that's done, he went back to the driver's seat and drove out of the place, leaving no trace behind except the body of the dead clone. " Is everybody alright ? " Battalion asked panting. He was proud of himself that day, he saved a whole lot of lives. And one of them wasn't familiar, " Hey who the hell are you ? " He pointed at the red guy that kinda looks like a lizard, demanding for some answers.

Has a fear of heights