Somebody That I Used to Know

So as many of you know, I'm moving to Columbus, Ohio this weekend, where I'll begin studies which will hopefully culminate in a doctorate in Communication and a focus in video games (which have always been my big thing, in case you're among those who got confused and thought maybe I was kidding about really knowing nothing at all about comics). This move entails packing up everything I've ever owned and moving 600 miles with most of it -- so naturally I've procrastinated as much as possible, and that means I've popped in on CV more in the last couple days than I told myself I would.

I've also been listening to random music, and a song that struck me was the ridiculously popular "Somebody That I Used to Know." In particular, I couldn't quite get past the lines, "so when we found that we could not make sense / well you said that we would still be friends... / but you didn't have to cut me off, make out like it never happened and that we were nothing."

I thought about my break with CV, with my comic blog, and with many folks on Tumblr with whom I was one day talking frequently and the next had unfollowed and/or completely stopped interacting with. Some of them didn't even realize I'd cut them off. The ones who did, or will, may get upset. In fact I imagine they would relate quite a bit to the lyrics of that song; a vitriolic "well screw you, man. Not cool." And I'd have earned it, I think. Because none of this has been "nothing" for me, but the seeming ease with which I walked away and went dark communication-wise might alienate people in a way which would suggest otherwise.

And that's why I'm writing this. It's not a recant, per se. It's just me making sure folks know that I still really like a lot of you and that I hope I can get to a point (or that mainstream comics can get to a point) where I can freely follow comic news and talk shop with people without worrying about having an earthshattering message or scan pass in front of me that shows a character I deeply care about dismembered. It may well be that it's just Avengers Arena -- that when that book ends, or when the threat of death has passed from it, I'll feel comfortable "coming back." The industry has done a lot to put me off, but I'm not sure if anything affects me the way that series does, so maybe without that to worry about I can get over the rest, because I do miss the chatting. I joined CV because I wanted to feel connected to others. That's still an existing desire -- just one I've cautiously decided to forego for the most part.

Money of course was the catalyst and it remains a major point of contention. I'll be exploring part-time job opportunities in Columbus supposing I can balance work with my research and classes, and if I can pull that off I fully intend to buy comics even if I continue to abstain from regular participation in the community. I find that I thrive off individual conversations anyway, and in the interim since I posted s.u.s.p.e.n.s.i.o.n. I have talked about some comics that I actually AM reading with some people, and will keep doing so. I am willing to talk with more people in PM, if that's something that you'd like to do.

So as a heads up, I am still reading Morning Glories and Fatale. If I can afford to I plan to stick with X-Men, UXM, and ANXM. Mara's ending but The Wake is just getting started, and each issue of Astro City I've read has made me smile. For money purposes (and as a digital reader), if I read anything from DC in the foreseeable future it will be a month later when prices drop, so if you were hoping to talk that (for example, Trinity War, which I *was* trying to keep up with) just know I won't be current.

There are a lot of awesome things in the comic industry which I just can't afford to be a part of and the more connected I am, the more likely those things will be spoiled for me before I do have the money and time to engage them (for example, I couldn't very well hope to read Trinity War a month behind if I were regularly reading CV, could I?).

I guess the point is that since I made my decision, I have felt less stressed. I have felt genuinely happy and am looking forward to reading the few comics I *do* get not because I feel obligated to hurry up and read them so I can discuss them or review them or not have them spoiled, but because they are a luxury and I have (for now) the chance to indulge therein. Folks told me all along that comics reading should be fun, and I was missing out on that because of such a sense of urgency. I'm happier with comics on my own schedule, no doubt. I just wish it didn't seem at odds with my desire to also keep in touch with the people I've gotten to know over the past half a year.

So this is me saying hey to anyone who felt like my departure was cold and sudden: I'd like to keep being Adam, and not just "somebody that you used to know." We had something here that I valued, that I still value, and that I hope one day to be able to bring back as strong as it used to be, but without the baggage that has made me abandon it as of late. I'll let you know when I think that's doable; meanwhile, the offer to engage in private discussion is there.

Just, you know...don't say anything to me about Avengers Arena ^_^

14 Comments
14 Comments
Posted by Cafeterialoca

We'll miss you!

Posted by AllStarSuperman

I thought you liked avengers arena?

Edited by akbogert

@allstarsuperman: That may be the most ridiculous interpretation of me I've ever seen on CV. :P

No, wait... that's second to "You parade your beliefs around the site as a badge of honour, but when it comes time to a check of morals you come up bankrupt."

Still... I actually cannot think of a more untrue thing. I literally joined CV to complain about AA's existence, after all.

Edited by AllStarSuperman

@akbogert: I was just kidding. I've talked to you before.

Posted by akbogert

@allstarsuperman: Yes, well I suppose it'd be impossible to have done so and actually believe I liked that book... though, sometimes folks surprise me, so I like to be sure ^_^

Posted by lykopis

Avengers what? Never heard of the book...

:P

I hear you, though. I've been taking a step back as well and have been working on a new perspective with the books I am following now. I am spending more time with the indies anyway.

I would suggest you put aside the idea of part-time work for at least the first semester (seriously). Lots of change coming your way, sir.

Posted by papad1992

Good luck to you with your studies... I'm heading out to a university too and just got a job at a radio station so I've been cutting back also, comic-book-purchasing-wise and being online CV.

בהצלחה - means "good luck" in Hebrew.

Posted by akbogert

@papad1992: Thanks! Good luck to you as well... er... Bonne chance, even.

@lykopis: When I went to my "local" (40 minutes away) comic shop last week I picked up the free Vertigo previews/forecast thing, and I have to admit a ton of stuff in there really intrigued me. Between them and Image, I will admit that the more independent stuff is definitely a much greater draw for me.

As for work, I'm not entirely sure it's up to me. As it stands now, I do not have enough money to cover the entire year's worth of expenses (my stipend is only 9 months), and I don't know if I want to risk depending on lucrative summer work. I'll be far happier, and far safer, if I can make money throughout the year and know for sure that at the very least I will be able to cover bills during the summer if I really can't find anything good. And if I do get some great summer work, then I'll just have extra cash. As it stands I don't feel comfortable living paycheck to paycheck, as it provides no opportunity for saving for the future, or any unforeseen expenses.

Posted by Madwizard321

Well... If this is your first year of college classes it will definitely be the hardest to get used too. It was a really big change for me and I'm finally starting to adjust to the change after almost being done school. I'll wish you the best of luck.... but I can't truly say I'll miss all of your thoughts about Avengers Arena.

Also, I'll wish you luck with the part time job. It really is difficult to balance college, and a job as well. Last year I was balancing three jobs and college and still manage to pull through. If I can do crazy crap like that I think you'll do fine... Hopefully. Good luck pursuing your dreams!!!!

Edited by MatKrenz

Are you sure you don't want me to tell you that in the last issue of Arena, X-23 became a cannibal and ate Hazmat's face off ? Cause that totally happened.

But seriously hope life gets streamlined a bit in the future.

Posted by akbogert

@madwizard321: First year of grad school. Technically this will be my fifth year of college. Though honestly there are so many things different about this (compared to my first year of undergrad) that I imagine it will still be a pretty shocking transition. And unsurprising regarding those thoughts :P As much as you may dislike reading them, I doubly dislike having them.

@matkrenz: Now, now. I'm not so long out of the loop as to have forgotten the latest issue isn't even in Murder World ^_^ But thanks!

Posted by animehunter

@akbogert: I know you don't want to know anything regarding Avengers Arena, but I thought you'd like to know that the November Solicits have stated that the this run of the book is ending with issue 18, and unfortunately has hinted at another run in the future.

This is what an article said about it

Also in November, "Avengers Arena" reaches its planned end with issue #18, dubbed "the searing series finale!" that's also "the launch pad for what comes next." In April, series writer Dennis Hopeless revealed that the "Boss Level" arc would serve as the finale for the first "season" of the series.

"The 'Boss Level' arc brings the story we set up with issue #1 to a close," Hopeless told CBR. "We told you from the start that this was a 30-day competition. 'Boss Level' takes us all the way to day 30 and beyond. After this, everything changes."

Posted by akbogert

@animehunter: Season Two has been promised for months now, so that's not really news. More like a lack thereof (in lieu of news that the series was cancelled).

Until the threat of death is explicitly removed from those kids, I don't want to know about it.

Posted by animehunter

@akbogert: If that happens, I'll let you know.