Wow! Big improvement from that last issue! I mean, I didn't know HOW Norman could POSSIBLY survive against the dream-team of big'uns, but turns out ((SPOILER! NO READY IF 'YA HAVEN'T READY! I'MA GIVIN' YA FAIR WARNIN! NO, REALLY, THIS IS ALL THE WARNING YOU GET!! BA-DA-DA-DA-DUM!! PREPARE FOR SPOILAGE!!)) the entire team was Molecule Man, and that they aren't actually the REAL deal. So, Molecule Man does what ANY overpowered guy in the Marvel U does... he beats the living crap outta the Avengers! (Or at least, one of the teams) 
 
Art - GREAT!  
 
4/5, because those scenes with the other Avenger's torment wasn't really needed... but seeing Gargan scream like a girl is fun!

WOW!!! That is all I can say. I mean, this is the DEFINITION of the saying "He stole the show", I mean, this became Deadpools book, proving that Joe writes a better Pool-in-ator than Spidey, but enough of that. The art is SO fun to look at, the dialogue is AMAZINGLY hilarious, and shifts from that to pure evil as the Kravens discuss their evil plans (The gaunlet). Oh, and remember kids, if Deadpool whips out his "Yomommageddon" joke, YOU BETTER FREAKIN RUN! 
 
(Oh, and did I forget to mention the edtiors notes got into the brawl inside Deadpools head?)
 
OH, and guest-starring Geoff Johns... as himself. No, really, I am serious.
 
 5 outta 5, FORCE YOUR FRIENDS TO READ BY ANY MEANS!!
 
 

Y'know, as awful as it sounds, I was always... indifferent about cancer, obviously, I never wished harm upon anyone, I just put it out of my mind, ignoring it. Now that era of my life is over, because my favorite character has it. The human half anyway. The alien half is(I guess "was" is the term now) pregnant.  
 
... 
 
WHAT THE @#%#?!? This arc MAJORLY screwed with my favorite character, and while I so LOVE giving fictional characters terminal diseases, I HATE (hate, hate, hate, HATE, HATE, HATE) screwing with their origin story! The symbiote didn't care what Eddie felt?? It just wanted his cancer?? WHAT THE HELL??? Now apparently the story is that Eddie, ontop of having a grudge, HAD to attack Spider-man, because the symbiote was keeping him alive by feeding on the cancer, and we all know the story of the symbiote's love/hate relationship with Spidey. But this is just ... WRONG. Personally, I've always wanted the symbiote to just give up on liking Spidey (Apparently now it was the adrenaline he produced, the symbiote addicted to it. Again, WTF?) but now it's just all screwed up (now with Gargan-Venom and Anti-Venom! Marvel just LOVES screwing Venom's fans over, don't they??)  
 
Aside from that horrible tinkering with the origin story, the mediocre art doesn't really help the arc overall.  
 
Honestly, this arc was the first thing that led to the shattering of Venom's character, and I hope the writer is ashamed of himself for doing such a stupid retcon. 
 
Only reason this gets a 1/5 is because the fight scenes were good.

It's finally here! Iron Patriot VS Iron Man! Not as we expected it, but still. It's even better. Tony has literally lost everything, his speech now reduced from just spelling errors a few issues back, to now just phrases that the art seems to be comminicating are a struggle to say. It's like watching worlds collide, beautiful. 
 
It ends on a note that sets up the next big storyline, and I'm happy for this book, I hated the art at first, but now I love it! (Iron Patriot looks awesome in this art.) so if I were you, I'd buy this! 
 
A random note - STOP PUTTING "Eiesner winner" on the cover! We get it Matt, you won an award! Sheesh! Bragger much?? 
 
5/5 - Buy it twice and give a copy to a friend, then make him show all his other friends, etc

Same ol' thing. Except now Norman's probably lost it (AGAIN) becuase of certain things I won't spoil. Anyways, people start dissapearing in what is literally the middle of nowhere according to the characters! Also uh.... Moonstone flirting with Bullseye? OMGWTFDAIRYQUEENWITHASIDEOFFRIES!?!?!??!!?!?!?  
 
On the bright side, it actually does look interesting for two different reasons 
 
1- Gargan is failing more than usual, whining like a baby about his job, could this be Bendis setting us up for the symbiote getting tired of him and ditching him? (Or it could be the meds.... but I hope its both!!! Brock FTW!) 
 
2- Mephisto appears. Could he start making references to One More Day? I doubt he would, but I would LOVE to see him playfully taunting Osborn about Spider-man's identity, no, I would PAY to see it, because at this point I'll have to anyways. 
 
So yeah, as usual, AMAZING art by Mike Deodato Jr, who is one of my favorite artists (Besides Adi Granov, JRJR, and Alex Ross) 
 
If you like Dark Avengers, seeing Gargan whine, or build-up to the Goblin's grande return, come read this! 
If not, then ditch this. 
 
3/5

Seriously! They ruined it! Fox has officially produced something that can only be described in two words! 
 
EEEEEEPPIIIIIIICCCCC FAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!! 
 
Lemme go through how they screwed up the characters (As I love to do in my reviews. Yeah, I got a style, deal with it.) 
 
Wolverine - Hugh Jackman is back................. again. He's always looked mediocre for the part (Ex - he's TALL.) And he always does a decent performance. Once again, the problem with movie-logan is.... he's just Logan. Never, NEVER, does this character ring to be "Wolverine" to me, just Logan. Same as in the X-trilogy. Again. At least he didn't cry as much as he did in X-men three. (What is it with Marvel making their leads in trilogies cry? Yeah, I'm lookin' at you, Spidey.) 
 
Gambit - He was okay.... for the four and 'a half seconds he was on there. Oh, except for the accent. So we get four and 'a half seconds, with a flawed accent. That's great. 
 
Wade Wilson - Ryan Reynolds, you sir, ARE DEADPOOL. The only reason I'm not giving this a 0/5 (Besides the fact that the rating system won't let me) is Ryan's performance as Wade Wilson. Don't even get me started on the awesomeness of the elavator scene..... 
 
Barakapool - WTF?? 
 
Blob - You can tell it's a fat suit, but they did a good job.... aside from the fact that Blob has always been fat. ALWAYS. 
 
Agent Zero - Isn't he German? Oh, and it took five minutes for Logan to kill him. 
   
Cyclops - Perfect as the trilogy before it, but I thought his lasers were CONCUSSIVE, as in, they didn't go through walls? 
 
CGI Xavier - Had better acting than most of the Team X guys ('Cept Ryan)..... kinda sad when you think about it. 
 
Sabertooth - Seeing Liev Shcrieber leap like a frog?? I LOVE THAT-- oh wait, no I don't. They probably got him right, but I don't even care enough to check, because I really don't care for most of the Logan-y characters....
 
 
That's all the ones I really care to remember at this point... I'm sure there was more. 
 
 
Okay, so this wasn't a serious review, and I'm bored outta my skull, whatever, but still, this movie sucked, don't watch it, unless you just go in for the part where Wade Wilson kills a room full of armed men within 30 seconds. Then leave. Quickly. Before Barakapool rapes your eyes.

The progressive slaughter of characters and the massive cluster of plots, with plenty of holes included. That's what this movie is. From a visual standpoint, its OK. (When it comes to Spidey and Sandman, not Gobby 2 or Venom) thats not what I wanna talk about. I wanna talk about the characters. So, here we go. 
 
Mary Jane/Kirsten Dunst - After doing an AWFUL job singing(I mean the actress, terrible singing voice.)  in the first part of the film, when she gets bad reviews, she gets very depressed, and sad, and angry, and emotional. Blah frickin' blah blah. Who cares? I don't. Maybe if the character came off as anything but a walking set of red hair that won't shut the hell up, I would care.  
 
Peter Parker/Tobey Maguire - Tobey has always been a bad choice for Spider-man. He looked OKAY as Peter Parker in the first one, now I don't see Peter Parker, I see Tobey Maguire. There is no illusion of good acting here, at least, for me. Plus, uh... Tobey, dude, what's with the double-chin?? Did Sam Raimi say "It's okay, you don't have to work out before the third movie." Peter Parker bonds to the symbiote in his sleep (As he's having nightmares about what is one of the worst retcons in history.) and becomes....... emo?? Seriously. He covers part of his face with his hair, and it MYSTERIOUSLY becomes jet-black, along with his eyelashes getting darker. And the dancing.... the dancing.... apparently, mister smart guy doesn't heed the word of scientists who say "TAKE IT OFF NOW." no, he doesn't stop to think "Hey, do I USUALLY dance in jazz clubs?" no. It takes SMACKING Mary Jane in the face (An unintentionally HILARIOUS scene) to realize something's wrong. So, he goes to the church tower to take the suit off -- (more on Venom a little later down in my review, for fanboys, 'ya might wanna skip this next section.) And one other thing - ONCE AGAIN, Sam has completley forgot that Spider-man is a wisecracker, he CONSTANTLY dishes out jokes, no matter who he's facing. One corny "I'm the sherrif 'round these parts" doesn't cut it for a two hour movie.
 
Sandman/Thomas Hayden Church - Visually, they got this character DOWN. Seriously. It's like he leapt out of a comic. Sadly, Sandman's back story and character in generall have been MAJORLY tampered with, thanks to mister "Every villian has to be sympathetic" Sam Raimi. I didn't mind that move with Doc Ock becoming a schzoid becuase it was actually GOOD. Randomly giving Sandman a daughter with an unspecified deadly disease?? No. That doesn't justify anything he does. Let me repeat: ANYTHING. When Sandman teams up with "Venom" (It ain't Venom to me, so its "Venom") to defeat Spider-man, first, he blocks the SWAT from coming to save Mary Jane, by THROWING CARS OVER. Gee, don'tcha think that might kill somebody? What if one of the cops daughters saw it on TV? Hypocrite. That's why sympathy doesn't work sometimes, sometimes its better just to have a villain who's EVIL. Or at least a street thug, like Sandy was in the comics. "My daughter was sick" is NOT a court defense. Oh, and apparently Sandman killed Uncle Ben, as Flint Marko..... I won't even touch that little drop of stupidity. Worst retcon ever. 
 
Harry Osborn/James Franco - this storyline was actually done right. It actually seems to be the only one Raimi cares about, at least enough to carry it three movies.... then ruin it with a visual/artistic change. The sky stick??? What the hell?!! Harry is NOT creative, like Sam said in interviews, he WOULD in fact take up his dad's Goblin gear, that's why he's the second Green Goblin!! He's Harry Osborn! Not a "Sky-sticker"!! And when Harry gets half his face blown off by Emo-Parker, his butler reveals it was Norman who was evil, the whole time. Kinda bad timing... 
 
Eddie Brock Jr./Topher Grace - Before I destroy this utter DESTRUCTION of character, let me verify this, Eddie Brock's name in the comics is EDWARD ALLEN BROCK. His most used name is Eddie, obviously. THERE IS NO JR. Thank you. Now, I see how Raimi might've been trying to combine the Ultimate comics Eddie with the normal comics Venom, but it just didn't work. He mixed all the wrong things! If you have Eddie working at the Bugle, you know theres something wrong. He didn't work at the bugle! He worked at the Globe!!!! Eddie in the comics, is NOT a womanizing smelly weasel, the ultimate one is, but the one everyone actually WANTED TO SEE is not. As for the photoshop abuse, come on, in the comics, Eddie Brock was wronged, he was not a cheater. Again, more Ultimate influence. *Sigh* .... and then... .we get... Venom. Or at least... what I'm sure is a parody of Venom, made by Sam Raimi to torment every Venom fans eyes.  A skinny, no tongued, no dual voiced, I instead of we saying, doesn't care for the innocent at all, teams up with Sandman when he SHOULDN'T Venom. That's what we get. A cinematic turd if there ever was one. (I mean, besides "The Happening") At least Raimi used the weaknessess to kill this abomination off, god, it was like watching an abortion. Hearing the symbiote, who in the comics has a personality and talks to its hosts, become a rampaging alien-ripoff with its loud demented scream, it was awful. I was glad the pumpkin bomb killed it.  
 
 
Point being, Spider-man 3 ruined several beloved characters, and shattered this franchise's credibility. I probably won't even watch SM4 unless it looks REALLY, REALLY, REALLLLLLLLYYYYYY good. Oh, and I'm never seeing a movie made by Sam Raimi again (I heard "Drag me to hell" sucked anyway. Go figure.) The only reason this even gets a one star is becuase of the visual effects. End of story. EPIC FAIL.

This comic can be summed up in many words... but I'll try to sum it up in one, just for fun. 
 
AMAZING. 
 
I know, cliched, done to death, etc. The thing is, this IS amazing, perfectly introducing the REAL Venom (Not this current Mac Gargan bullsh*t) to Spidey, who is scared stiff of him! The origin is short, only a few pages, not really interuppting the flow of the story much, then right back to the action, and its brutal. Not gonna spoil it for those who haven't read (You haven't read this?! What's wrong with you?!?!?!) but this the perfect Venom comic. The only thing I don't like about the original Venom is the lack of fangs and no tongue, but this was Venom in the early days, before the tongue (What? I like the tongue.) so I don't even care, this portrays Venom perfect. Phsyco who will stop at nothing to destroy Spidey, terrorize everyone he loves, and tear down everything he stands for. And the art is.... perfect. I think I died and went to fanboy heaven. Get this in the "Birth of Venom" tradepaperback, or buy it yourself, point is, READ THIS BOOK!!!!

This book is HILARIOUS! Whether it's Anal Probage (Yeah, it's a word now) or hunting down and killing fanboys, Deadpool doesn't stop being funny, EVER. Pretty much non stop hilarity, and now apparently the voices in Deadpool's head have learned how to fight each other, AND break the fourth wall, which was, again, HILARIOUS. One really has to wonder what his head looks like from a visual standpoint, maybe in a later issue of Deadpool we'll find out. Oh, and is it just me, or does the white box seem to be the writer? Probably just me. Sadly, the art does get a little weird at times (The Shrinking) but other times its awesome (Rob Liefield returns!) that's the ONLY reason this isn't a 5/5 from me! BUY THIS NOW!