Add to the following:

"They said I was sick in the head. They said I needed help. Well, maybe I'm a little Batty blame it on the Bats in my belfry!"

"Shoot the kids and drown the neighbors! We've got a winner!"

"It'd be funny if it weren't so pathetic. Oh, what the heck I'll laugh anyway, AHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Now comes the part where I relieve you, the little people, of the burden of your failed and useless lives. But remember, as my plastic surgeon always said: if you gotta go, go with a smile."

"Let's put a smile on that Face!"-From the new Batman movie, so it doesn't count but it's still a Joker quote.

Here are some lines (from Newsradio) that I could easily imagine being said by Joker:

"Shredding the instructions for the shredder. Talk about your mindblowing irony.....Dare I ?......Look at it go!....Now where the hell is that speed control?"

"Matthew... do I look like a man who would enjoy a game of Goofy-Ball?"

"I haven`t read comics since I realized Beetle Bailey was never actually gonna shoot somebody"

"You know when I said you look like you'd lost weight? Well, I lied, go find a treadmill, you fat son of a bitch."

"Kidnapping... it's not just for kids... anymore."

"You don’t drop a piranha in the kiddie pool and stick around to watch the bubbles."

"Say, Dave, maybe after work you'd like to go by the zoo and shoot goats."

"Someone somewhere wants me crazy"

"No I am not paranoid cause I can say without a trace of irony you're all out to get me!"

"I think a good hunting accident would really open your mind."

M

"Never rub another man's rhubarb!" - from the original Batman movie. Still no idea what it means, but I thought it was as funny as hell.

(Just the laugh)

'Do I look like I am kidding?' -from the first Batman movie, Joker to Vicky Vale.

Superkitty says:

"(Just the laugh)"

The third picture is so darn funny. :D

/CG

'Sorry, the henchgirl role has been filled. Quite nicely, too.' -from 'Joker's Millions'. I find this line damn funny, maybe for the way he sayed that, Mark Hamill ROCKS!!!

"HAHAHAHAAHAA..."

"That's not funny. That's not..."

Form the Batman Beyond film.

From Arkham Asylum

"Why so Serious?"

From the new Batman movie
Post Edited:2008-04-25 13:21:34

Joker: Oooo! I can see right up your skirt, you shameless hussy! I can't understand why i was ever attracted to a tramp like you!

From Going Sane, Part 4.

Joker: We laughed because it was absurd -- because we are. But you're not laughing any more. Neither am I.

From Secrets.

Joker: I am a force of nature-- a force of the mind! And I must have a counter force -- only one man can stand against me-- make me work--

From Dark Detective.

Joker: I know you're out there somewhere, but you're supposed to be here.. now... with me! Don't you love me anymore?

From Duty, Part 2.

There's millions I could post here; but those are among the first that comes to mind!

uhhh

"Everything she do is like me, tryin to imitate me.."

he never said but "Why did i do it? Well for the Lulz of course."

Ever Dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?

'Wooo! Something new has been added! A big improvement over the Boy Blunder...'

'I really have to congratulate myself on this one!'

'Obviously, must I do everything myself.'

From Batman TAS

WHY SO SERIOUS?

"It's all a joke! Everything anybody ever valued or struggled for... it's all a monstrous, demented gag! So why can't you see the funny side? Why aren't you laughing?"

"Why so serious" and other movie lines are basically just alterations of the comics' Joker thoughts. I prefer the original's quotes.

"

he never said but "Why did i do it? Well for the Lulz of course."

"

"I only laugh on the outside, my smile is just skin deep; if you look inside, i'm really crying, wont you join me for a weep?" -Joker, in Batman the movie, (the 1st one) cos underneath all that madness, he's just an ordinary... ok a little excentric man

"Whats love, but hate with a bit of friction?"- Joker from the terrible Harley Quinn series.

Its still a good quote.

"Everything I do is to prove a point....1 ..little... point... ... To Laugh... at your own death! to not take life, so seriously!"
from Patient J,  bat in the sun productions

"
"All I've ever wanted... is to have a good time. And to annoy Batman, whenever possible, of course. And to one day murder Batman and defile his carcass sexually. And a pony."  
 
"I'm not exactly sure what happened.....sometimes I remember it one way, sometimes another.....If I'm going to have a past, I'd perfer it to be mutliple choice!"    "

Joker:
When I was gone, I met a man who was obsessed with driving a car around the world in one day.
He swore up and down he could do it.
And he TRIED to, many times, from what I understand.
 
Johnny:
He never made it?
 
Joker:
No he was...GONE, but that's not the point.
 
Johnny:
There is one i'm assuming.
 
Joker:
So you don't GET it, Johnny Johnny?
He blamed the CARS for his failures.
It never crossed his mind that what he BELIEVED he could do was IMPOSSIBLE.
I ADMIRE that.
I REALLY do.

"Wait'll they get a load a me." Original Batman movie... Jim Carey did this for a skit and had Jack's look down to a "T". It was either SNL or In Living Color back in the early 90s.
 
I always loved the scenes with him and Harley...
 

" @The_Jokes_On_You said:

"
"All I've ever wanted... is to have a good time. And to annoy Batman, whenever possible, of course. And to one day murder Batman and defile his carcass sexually. And a pony."  
 
"I'm not exactly sure what happened.....sometimes I remember it one way, sometimes another.....If I'm going to have a past, I'd perfer it to be mutliple choice!"    "

WTF!?!!? "

 
"How does it feel to be the clown at midnight?"    
 
"Oh, you. You just couldn’t let me go, could you? This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object. You are truly incorruptible, aren’t you? Huh? You won’t kill me out of some misplaced sense of self-righteousness. And I won’t kill you because you’re just too much fun. I think you and I are destined to do this forever." 
 
 'Do you want to know why I use a knife? Guns are too quick. You can’t savor all the… little emotions. In… you see, in their last moments, people show you who they really are. So in a way, I know your friends better than you ever did. Would you like to know which of them were cowards?" 
 
"Do I really look like a guy with a plan?You know what I am? I’m a dog chasing cars. I wouldn’t know what to do with one if I caught it. You know, I just… do things. The mob has plans, the cops have plans, Gordon’s got plans. You know, they’re schemers. Schemers trying to control their little worlds. I’m not a schemer. I try to show the schemers how pathetic their attempts to control things really are. So, when I say… Ah, come here.
When I say that you and your girlfriend was nothing personal, you know that I’m telling the truth. It’s the schemers that put you where you are. You were a schemer, you had plans, and look where that got you. I just did what I do best. I took your little plan and I turned it on itself. Look what I did to this city with a few drums of gas and a couple of bullets. Hmmm? You know… You know what I’ve noticed? Nobody panics when things go “according to plan.” Even if the plan is horrifying! If, tomorrow, I tell the press that, like, a gang banger will get shot, or a truckload of soldiers will be blown up, nobody panics, because it’s all “part of the plan.” But when I say that one little old mayor will die, well then everyone loses their minds!
Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I’m an agent of chaos. Oh, and you know the thing about chaos? It’s fair!" 
  
"You shot me in the leg! How will I walk...oh, just like your daughter. Good one, Commissioner! ahahaha"  
 
"I did it! I finally killed Batman! In front of a bunch of vulnerable, disabled kids! Now--BRING ME SANTA CLAUS! HAHAHAHAHAHA!"     
 
"My mistake. Here I was hoping for the rambunctious rodent. And I get the WWF reject instead" (talking to Bane)   
 
      "Drown the kids and shoot the neighbors! We've got a winner!"     
 
"It's a clear choice -- me or Pettit. Vote or die. Cancer or tuberculosis."     
 
"Oh, yes! Fill the churches with dirty thoughts! Introduce honesty to the White House! Write letters in dead languages to people you've never met! Paint filthy words on the foreheads of children! Burn your credit cards and wear high heels! Asylum doors stand open! Fill the suburbs with murder and rape! Divine madness! Let there be ecstacy, ecstacy in the streets! Laugh and the world laughs with you!"     
 
"You dirty rat! You killed my brother! My sister! My daughter! She's my sister and my daughter!" 

-note- I read alot of Batman and watch alot of Batman, the best comic ever.   

" Boner. "

 "All it takes is one bad day to reduce the sanest man alive to lunacy. That's how far the world is from where I am. Just one bad day."

" @InnerVenom123 said:

" @The_Jokes_On_You said:

"
"All I've ever wanted... is to have a good time. And to annoy Batman, whenever possible, of course. And to one day murder Batman and defile his carcass sexually. And a pony."  
 
"I'm not exactly sure what happened.....sometimes I remember it one way, sometimes another.....If I'm going to have a past, I'd perfer it to be mutliple choice!"    "

WTF!?!!? "

Same here :D  If that is an unmodified quote, I'd like to know where it's from "

" @Croaker said:

" @InnerVenom123 said:

" @The_Jokes_On_You said:

"
"All I've ever wanted... is to have a good time. And to annoy Batman, whenever possible, of course. And to one day murder Batman and defile his carcass sexually. And a pony."  
 
"I'm not exactly sure what happened.....sometimes I remember it one way, sometimes another.....If I'm going to have a past, I'd perfer it to be mutliple choice!"    "

WTF!?!!? "

Same here :D  If that is an unmodified quote, I'd like to know where it's from "

Ahh, I remember that! It's from the one with the guy who says bang or bam when shooting, he like sounds out everything but never really talks. Onomatopoeia! I had to google the title but it's Batman: Cacophony. That book was great. "

Pain is my boon companion! My stalwart friend! I am alive with pain every moment of every day, Lex! Ever since that fateful day when I was baptized in a vat of chemical goo, that corrosive stuff has burned through my skin like fire. Pain is my one true love! I admire your willingness to do violence, Lex. Because you have no problem doing it when you have to. But I'm different, Lex. I do violence because it's fun! You're good at your job, Lex. But me? I love my job!

"WHY SO SERIOUS? "

Here is what he should be saying "If I was any other Superheroes main villain I would have been dead a long time  ago"

the joke he told batman in the killing joke
there was two inmates escaping a prison but they had to cross over two bulindings by jumping, one inmate did it, but the other stayed, the other inmate tried to persaude him but he was scared to fall. then he told him look i'll turn on my flash light and you could cross ontop to the other side. and the other inmate said are do you think i'm crazy! you'll turn it off as soon as i halfway across!...hahahhaha.HAHAHAHAHA
 
something like that /./

"Don't get cute with me, Red! He's ripping me off! I'll protest! Yeah, I'll sue! Then I'll rip his lungs out! And I will, too." -Joker's Wild, B:TAS  
 
Joker: "Which one is it?" 
Lex: "The red button." 
Joker: "Which red bu...Oh who cares!" -World's Finest

^ That just mad me laugh the first time i saw.
   

Flash (to martian manhunter)- jo'n you have been in the jokers mind, what's it like.
 
Martian Manhunter: ......... 

Batman-  It''s a plague of locusts covering a dead black sun
 
Martian Manhunter- Yes excactly

You know, kids, a lot has changed since your old Uncle Joker's been
away. New Gotham, new rules, even a new Batman. But now I'm tanned, I'm
rested and I'm ready to give this old town a wedgie again!

i forget which book this is from since they're not in front of me, but i'm gonna paraphrase-ish: 
oh c'mon [Nightwing], i hit jason harder than that..his name was Jason... wasn't it? 
 
this line i think is pretty powerful..just shows how much of a psychopath joker really is. 

"You can't spell SLAUGHTER without LAUGHTER" 
 
It's creepy and insane. That's my joker ^_^

" i forget which book this is from since they're not in front of me, but i'm gonna paraphrase-ish: oh c'mon [Nightwing], i hit jason harder than that..his name was Jason... wasn't it?  this line i think is pretty powerful..just shows how much of a psychopath joker really is.  "

lets put it this way my Chaos spreads as fast as a virus, and yet im as infectious as the next whohahahahahaha, you think this city looks for hope in The Bat?!!! NO no no....look everyday at the news , the killings, the murder, the downright one bad day that just made the sanest man go BATSHIT crazy and I mean that literally whohahahahahahahahahah! this city looks up to chaos and im an agent of chaos. Or maybe im not real at all ehhhhh ooooooooo! now were talking yeah maybe im just a figment of The Bats crazy personaltys...whohahahahahahahahahahahah he he ha ha!