Vine RPG Weekly Roast #4 - Closure

Welcome one and all to the one and only weekly roast of one of our very own RPG writers. Am I being mean and setting someone up? Why no, because every person roasted is a volunteer (and Icky can ban-hammer me)

Lord have @mercy_ on my soul.

This is where I weed out the friends from the fart tarts.

This is where the magic begins.

This is where *runs to his room

Oh....oh..............oh lord.

@mercy_: If she who shall not be named gets out of line...expect world war 3 *makes hand gestures

Didn't he used to rule the seas? , couldn't even hold down the job of being the vines Aquaman. And nobody wants to be Aquaman.

WW3 will be upon us....soon.

@armistice: To the bomb shelters

@armistice said:

Whoa.

When are you going to volunteer and be a trooper :)

@armistice: I don't think anybody from the popular table are gonna do this roast thing.

You'd have to make that so worth my while.

My mere continuing presence is worth it :)

@cellphonegirl said:

Oh God. I forgot about Clara. *Falls apart

@armistice: Eddy/Cass are still on the list for future roasts right?

@closure:

Just be prepared for all of the amount of roasting I will deliver these next Seven Days. For one week the Pink is switching to Blood Red.

@armistice: just choked on your ego a lil bit

@cellphonegirl: Who knew someone with so little rpg history would have the ups on me >.<

You bring the roast....I'll bring the sass sauce

Closure? LOL you're going to regret this.

@andres_knightfall said:

I thought why not prove I'm the bigger person. Why not show I've got balls.

*Dusts off the comeback boots

You are now.

By choked you mean basked in my glory :)

I was waiting for your arrival, enjoy.

@armistice: Is that why you asked me to do this; to become Andres' plaything (this time OOC)? *Shakes head

@armistice: I did volunteer weeks ago lol during week one. Can use either/both (same thread) doesnt bother me.

Nope, everyone will have their turn if it's up to me

I must have missed it, that was a hectic period for me.

Next week is reserved for you.

@armistice: I will :)

@armistice: I hope you realize I'm not waiting an entire week to respond to these chaps. Uh Uh.

And what do you mean by can't defend myself?

"Closure you're a bastard."

"Oh damn. Grrr" *waits a week to respond

???

@armistice: Its cool man, i shall look forward to a swarm of tea, lime and various other forms of overt racism next week

@andres_knightfall said:

I'm guessing I get roasted cause we actually know one another as opposed to the last three volunteers?

You sir are a class act *pokes the beehive

He's a whore for my attention. Next, insert Clara Mass plain old whore joke here.

Insert pedophile joke here.

what do you think will happen when it's my turn, no one gets it worse than the roastmaster.

@_strigidae_ said:

Hey now the title says Closure not Nerx.

@closure: That you made the comparison yourself speaks to the depravity of your situation.

I only wish I screenshotted those wall posts from a week or so ago.

@_strigidae_ said:

I made no comparison simply corrected your mistake.

Hey now. I'm pretty sure whatever it was I said was age appropriate *shifty eyes

@closure: Not a mistake. It was totally founded.

Impregnates...

Right. Totally age appropriate.

@_strigidae_ said:

LOL! I'm pretty sure we're the same age.....I think

And while we're on the topic of horrible things, his grammar makes me cringe at times.

Closure... I don't believe we have met in character.

Clara Mass... I'll see you in hell your snaggletoothed crotch pheasant... You gutter snipe... You two fist in the cancan Jezebel... Hark! Hark I say to the devil dogs that will drag this foul beast into the lake of fire and brimstone... A pox on you!

@_strigidae_ said:

Hey! Everybody's grammar bothers you.

LOL! I read this like an overzealous mother-in-law berating her son's fiance o.o

Oh, this will turn out bad.

Closure, what can I say about Closure that hasnt already been said about STD's? Closure is a cross between a flamboyant homo-sexual and Penguin sh!t. Only Penguin sh!t is more enjoyable to be around. He's like the dorky brother you befriend just so you can bang his sister. Only you quickly realize that his sister is really him in a wig and you've just been Catfished, or worse,Bangkoked. Closure is the single biggest piece of sh!t in the terd bowl and thats including his Norman Bates like alter ego Clara Mass. Together they form a fully functional assh@le complete with Teen Wolf quotes, Pretty Little Liar avatars, and Ryan Goslin fetishes. But it hasnt been a complete waste of DNA. Closure recently landed a small bit part in the blockbuster movie The Hangover part 2.

@the_last_arashikage:

O_o

Damn son.....

@the_last_arashikage: LMFAO! <3

@street_samurai: @armistice: We only roast the ones we love :D

Can't tell if the kid's a masochist or if he's got heart.

Little bit of each I believe.....

lmmfaoooooooooooooooooooooooo

The "popular table" is nothing but where I decide to set up shop that day :)

I will harass the stragglers to take their whipping like the rest of us

@the_last_arashikage said:

Closure, what can I say about Closure that hasnt already been said about STD's? Closure is a cross between a flamboyant homo-sexual and Penguin sh!t. Only Penguin sh!t is more enjoyable to be around. He's like the dorky brother you befriend just so you can bang his sister. Only you quickly realize that his sister is really him in a wig and you've just been Catfished, or worse,Bangkoked. Closure is the single biggest piece of sh!t in the terd bowl and thats including his Norman Bates like alter ego Clara Mass. Together they form a fully functional assh@le complete with Teen Wolf quotes, Pretty Little Liar avatars, and Ryan Goslin fetishes. But it hasnt been a complete waste of DNA. Closure recently landed a small bit part in the blockbuster movie The Hangover part 2.

Holy Shit! I was waiting for the day someone used this pic. I legit laughed bro *applauds

@assault: @_steel_: You're welcome.