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#1 Posted by Armistice (4132 posts) - - Show Bio

Welcome one and all to the one and only weekly roast of one of our very own RPG writers. Am I being mean and setting someone up? Why no, because every person roasted is a volunteer (and Icky can ban-hammer me).

Here are the rules:

1 - The person being roasted can post but cannot defend themselves until the week is up. Suck it up if you put yourself on the chopping block.

2 - All jabs are meant to be in good nature so nothing personal or out of line

stares at Morte

3 - These will run Monday to Monday and then a new one will be created for the next victim :)

The KOV heckling thread was just the warm-up, I expect better so do your worst.

#2 Posted by LastPyre (1009 posts) - - Show Bio

Oh cool its this again. I loved this.

#3 Posted by CellphoneGirl (18764 posts) - - Show Bio

Whoever makes the best cellphone pun is my favorite.

#4 Posted by LastPyre (1009 posts) - - Show Bio
#5 Posted by LastPyre (1009 posts) - - Show Bio

Lets face it. You're goning need to call an ambulance to treat the major burns you'll get from this thread.

#6 Posted by Armistice (4132 posts) - - Show Bio

CPG was one of the last few to cling to Prime like a childhood teddy bear , but then just like everyone else flocked to the CVnU and became a:

Cell-Out

#7 Posted by LastPyre (1009 posts) - - Show Bio
#8 Posted by Armistice (4132 posts) - - Show Bio
#9 Edited by LastPyre (1009 posts) - - Show Bio

@armistice:Yes, everything is a-OK . Now I can go from not contributing at all, to barely contributing. Its wonderful.

#10 Edited by Armistice (4132 posts) - - Show Bio

@lastpyre said:

@armistice:Yes, everything is a-OK . Now I can go from not contributing at all, to barely contributing. Its wonderful.

I think I have just followed you for the third time, the Vine never makes it stick LOL

The Vine is in a really weird state right now, I'm on the sidelines myself.

It also seems to be having a Villain Team revival (Vine Villains and HFC) you should see if they have openings. Best way to get involved and really learn the ropes is join a team, those two are just getting rolling so I would look into it.

#11 Edited by _Cain_ (23659 posts) - - Show Bio

God this thread is getting such little reception, CPG is going to need to take off all that (4G) Coverage she had on on for safety in case somebody made her battery die of ILaughter (or IPain) through a really good burn application. Wi-fi. Texting. Data. LONG DISTANCE CALLING!!!!....

ART IS A LIE, NOTHING IS REAL!

#12 Posted by _Glacier_ (6705 posts) - - Show Bio

Dude,this thread is such a prank!

#13 Posted by LastPyre (1009 posts) - - Show Bio

@armistice: I will see if I can join the vine villains. I don't think that a club is really the place for Last Pyre, even if it is evil in nature.

#14 Posted by EdwardWindsor (14340 posts) - - Show Bio

CPG is such a creative person from Cellphone Girl to Cellphone Boy and Finally Cellphone Dog. A pinnacle of creativity what will be next Cellphone Cat? Cellphone Man/woman who knows.

#15 Posted by _Glacier_ (6705 posts) - - Show Bio
#16 Posted by EdwardWindsor (14340 posts) - - Show Bio

@demolitionguy: its another option, along with many others with the prefix Cellphone

#17 Posted by _Glacier_ (6705 posts) - - Show Bio
#18 Posted by EdwardWindsor (14340 posts) - - Show Bio
#19 Posted by _Glacier_ (6705 posts) - - Show Bio

@edwardwindsor: Probably she turn it off.She is losing the line,man.

#20 Posted by _Cerberus_ (3450 posts) - - Show Bio

She's too sweet to roast, she'll melt and put out the fire (^_^)!

#21 Posted by ReEnforcer (2358 posts) - - Show Bio

There's nothing I love more then striking up a convo with a female character trying to get to know the woman behind the keyboard and finding out she's a dude. Gotta love CPG.

#22 Posted by Armistice (4132 posts) - - Show Bio

There's nothing I love more then striking up a convo with a female character trying to get to know the woman behind the keyboard and finding out she's a dude. Gotta love CPG.

Internet rule 42 - Without proof, always assume the girl on the other end of a chat is a dude :)

#23 Edited by Street_Samurai (320 posts) - - Show Bio

Hey Dog... Where you at!?

#24 Posted by Despair (2266 posts) - - Show Bio

Roasting CPG? WTF? I mean... come on! It's like burning a care bear. The girl... dude... whatever is so f*cking nice she would try to hug Darkchild till he sees the error of his ways. She is like the Jonah Hill of CV, so nice you are looking for the rotten, evil, incredibly well hidden dark core but then you get to know this dark core is only dark because it's chocolate! Honestly, if you fight her you are more likely to die from a diabetes shock than any of her attacks. And her writing style... This girl gave ADHS a home on the Vine. Hello? It's called THIRD person rpging for a reason! You don't have to open your vaccuum sealed, multi-coloured-fluffy-hair-covered skull and let this teenage-soap-opera-stuff flood this site with you as the Glee-inspired first person protagonist jumping from topic to topic with the usual two second attention span of a stoned cheerleader teenage girl. I've seen other people write a gazillion lines about their battle moves and then there is CPG who spends two paragraphs in every post of a rpg to tell us how she texts with her fellow team members. Go, jump out of that closet and finally join a musical troupe!

(Hope I was not too hard. Still love you niecey.)

#25 Edited by _Cerberus_ (3450 posts) - - Show Bio

I'm not gonna roast Cell Phone girl I'm going to DEFEND HER!

#26 Posted by CellphoneGirl (18764 posts) - - Show Bio

@_cerberus_: <3

@despair_: LOL I totally wrote half a post recently about CPG snapchatting Maya Lopez

#27 Posted by _Glacier_ (6705 posts) - - Show Bio

@cellphonegirl: You aren't worth that 50 cents they make me pay for a call.

Jk,can't roast someone I don't know =)

#28 Posted by Guardian_of_Gravity (2979 posts) - - Show Bio

Why are you even called CellphoneGirl? None of your powers have anything to do with phones of any kind. It just bugs me, was Sparklefairy not an option? Or how about Razzledazzle? Or maybe Screamie meenie?

But no, Cellphone girl.

At least with Razzle dazzle I can kind of guess "oh hey, a fairy!" But Cellphone Girl? When people hear that they won't think "sparkly fairy", they'll go "Isn't that the lady at Verizon?". What kind of lame brain comes up with Cellphone girl and thinks "we got us here one dayuumm fine supername".

I wanna know, what demon of stupidity drilled it's way into your head and told you "Psst, Cellphone girl is an awesome name, here have some Cocaine and you'll see".

Actually...do you even own a cell phone?

#29 Posted by Charlemagne (6964 posts) - - Show Bio

I managed to find a CellphoneGirl feat from Prime. Its iconic

.

#30 Posted by _Cerberus_ (3450 posts) - - Show Bio

The only thing people they can diss on cell phone girl is her name lol!

#31 Posted by Pyrogram (41269 posts) - - Show Bio
#32 Posted by _Cerberus_ (3450 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram: but you can't call her out on that!

#33 Posted by Charlemagne (6964 posts) - - Show Bio

Just did lol

#34 Posted by _Cerberus_ (3450 posts) - - Show Bio
#35 Edited by Charlemagne (6964 posts) - - Show Bio
#36 Posted by Armistice (4132 posts) - - Show Bio

CellPhoneGirl?

More like CellPhoneyGirl:)

#37 Posted by Street_Samurai (320 posts) - - Show Bio

CellphoneGirl... I love you... That is why I was nice before. But you deserve more...

You know that feeling that a hangnail or a scratch at the back of your throat gives you... You can't stop playing with it, but you know that for the love of god you should just leave it alone... That to me is CellphoneGirl... She kills you with kindness and stupidity... I find myself asking... The lights our obviously on... But is anyone driving that damn thing? Retarded is an outdated term... Well CellphoneGirl is a constant irrelevant! Like a double negative... First you see her, and then you poke your eyes out and set yourself on fire because you saw what should never have been seen in the first place. Cancer and Aids exist because Karma is a bitch and people like CellphoneGirl keep walking on the Earth, and pouring out Jolly ham farts where ever they go!

#38 Posted by Pyrogram (41269 posts) - - Show Bio

Cancer and Aids exist because Karma is a bitch and people like CellphoneGirl keep walking on the Earth, and pouring out Jolly ham farts where ever they go!

Lmfao!

#39 Posted by CellphoneGirl (18764 posts) - - Show Bio

I love you all for making me laugh this hard <3

#40 Edited by _Cain_ (23659 posts) - - Show Bio

Jesus christ could you be LESS happy? I mean somebody straight up called you the reason aids exist and you're laughing. It proves their damn point lol

#41 Posted by CellphoneGirl (18764 posts) - - Show Bio
#42 Posted by Legacy_ (10699 posts) - - Show Bio

@the_last_arashikage said:

I managed to find a CellphoneGirl feat from Prime. Its iconic

.

oh god. I pissed.

Part of me wants to sign up for this roast ish.....

#43 Posted by CellphoneGirl (18764 posts) - - Show Bio
#44 Posted by Legacy_ (10699 posts) - - Show Bio
#45 Posted by _Cerberus_ (3450 posts) - - Show Bio
#46 Posted by CellphoneGirl (18764 posts) - - Show Bio

@_cerberus_:

Cellular Dog is the main boss <3

@closure: I have the perfect layout of Gifs just for you ;]

#47 Posted by Legacy_ (10699 posts) - - Show Bio
#48 Edited by CellphoneGirl (18764 posts) - - Show Bio

This was really fun <3

#49 Edited by Legacy_ (10699 posts) - - Show Bio

@cellphonegirl: Dammit. I suppose I'll have to insult in some other form o.o

#50 Edited by Armistice (4132 posts) - - Show Bio