Vine RPG Weekly Roast #3 - CellPhoneGirl

Welcome one and all to the one and only weekly roast of one of our very own RPG writers. Am I being mean and setting someone up? Why no, because every person roasted is a volunteer (and Icky can ban-hammer me).

Here are the rules:

Oh cool its this again. I loved this.

Whoever makes the best cellphone pun is my favorite.

@cellphonegirl:

Lets face it. You're goning need to call an ambulance to treat the major burns you'll get from this thread.

CPG was one of the last few to cling to Prime like a childhood teddy bear , but then just like everyone else flocked to the CVnU and became a:

Cell-Out

@armistice: Good one!

Welcome back, get everything worked out?

@armistice:Yes, everything is a-OK . Now I can go from not contributing at all, to barely contributing. Its wonderful.

I think I have just followed you for the third time, the Vine never makes it stick LOL

The Vine is in a really weird state right now, I'm on the sidelines myself.

It also seems to be having a Villain Team revival (Vine Villains and HFC) you should see if they have openings. Best way to get involved and really learn the ropes is join a team, those two are just getting rolling so I would look into it.

God this thread is getting such little reception, CPG is going to need to take off all that (4G) Coverage she had on on for safety in case somebody made her battery die of ILaughter (or IPain) through a really good burn application. Wi-fi. Texting. Data. LONG DISTANCE CALLING!!!!....

ART IS A LIE, NOTHING IS REAL!

Dude,this thread is such a prank!

@armistice:I will see if I can join the vine villains. I don't think that a club is really the place for Last Pyre, even if it is evil in nature.

CPG is such a creative person from Cellphone Girl to Cellphone Boy and Finally Cellphone Dog. A pinnacle of creativity what will be next Cellphone Cat? Cellphone Man/woman who knows.

@edwardwindsor: Cellphone God probably does.

@demolitionguy: its another option, along with many others with the prefix Cellphone

@edwardwindsor: We should give her a call and ask.

@demolitionguy: The phone was engaged or she isnt taking my calls.

@edwardwindsor: Probably she turn it off.She is losing the line,man.

She's too sweet to roast, she'll melt and put out the fire (^_^)!

There's nothing I love more then striking up a convo with a female character trying to get to know the woman behind the keyboard and finding out she's a dude. Gotta love CPG.

Internet rule 42 - Without proof, always assume the girl on the other end of a chat is a dude :)

Hey Dog... Where you at!?

Roasting CPG? WTF? I mean... come on! It's like burning a care bear. The girl... dude... whatever is so f*cking nice she would try to hug Darkchild till he sees the error of his ways. She is like the Jonah Hill of CV, so nice you are looking for the rotten, evil, incredibly well hidden dark core but then you get to know this dark core is only dark because it's chocolate! Honestly, if you fight her you are more likely to die from a diabetes shock than any of her attacks. And her writing style... This girl gave ADHS a home on the Vine. Hello? It's called THIRD person rpging for a reason! You don't have to open your vaccuum sealed, multi-coloured-fluffy-hair-covered skull and let this teenage-soap-opera-stuff flood this site with you as the Glee-inspired first person protagonist jumping from topic to topic with the usual two second attention span of a stoned cheerleader teenage girl. I've seen other people write a gazillion lines about their battle moves and then there is CPG who spends two paragraphs in every post of a rpg to tell us how she texts with her fellow team members. Go, jump out of that closet and finally join a musical troupe!

(Hope I was not too hard. Still love you niecey.)

I'm not gonna roast Cell Phone girl I'm going to DEFEND HER!

@_cerberus_: <3

@despair_: LOL I totally wrote half a post recently about CPG snapchatting Maya Lopez

@cellphonegirl: You aren't worth that 50 cents they make me pay for a call.

Jk,can't roast someone I don't know =)

Why are you even called CellphoneGirl? None of your powers have anything to do with phones of any kind. It just bugs me, was Sparklefairy not an option? Or how about Razzledazzle? Or maybe Screamie meenie?

But no, Cellphone girl.

At least with Razzle dazzle I can kind of guess "oh hey, a fairy!" But Cellphone Girl? When people hear that they won't think "sparkly fairy", they'll go "Isn't that the lady at Verizon?". What kind of lame brain comes up with Cellphone girl and thinks "we got us here one dayuumm fine supername".

I wanna know, what demon of stupidity drilled it's way into your head and told you "Psst, Cellphone girl is an awesome name, here have some Cocaine and you'll see".

Actually...do you even own a cell phone?

I managed to find a CellphoneGirl feat from Prime. Its iconic

The only thing people they can diss on cell phone girl is her name lol!

@_cerberus_: Simplicity is the best.

@pyrogram: but you can't call her out on that!

Just did lol

you're going to ruin her cellesteem.

Goes on a Katt Williams esq rant about Self-Esteem :P

CellPhoneGirl?

More like CellPhoneyGirl:)

CellphoneGirl... I love you... That is why I was nice before. But you deserve more...

You know that feeling that a hangnail or a scratch at the back of your throat gives you... You can't stop playing with it, but you know that for the love of god you should just leave it alone... That to me is CellphoneGirl... She kills you with kindness and stupidity... I find myself asking... The lights our obviously on... But is anyone driving that damn thing? Retarded is an outdated term... Well CellphoneGirl is a constant irrelevant! Like a double negative... First you see her, and then you poke your eyes out and set yourself on fire because you saw what should never have been seen in the first place. Cancer and Aids exist because Karma is a bitch and people like CellphoneGirl keep walking on the Earth, and pouring out Jolly ham farts where ever they go!

Lmfao!

I love you all for making me laugh this hard <3

Jesus christ could you be LESS happy? I mean somebody straight up called you the reason aids exist and you're laughing. It proves their damn point lol

@shadowknight666:

@the_last_arashikage said:

oh god. I pissed.

Part of me wants to sign up for this roast ish.....

@closure: Do it ;]

@cellphonegirl: Imma get slayed though.

You're just boss like that :P

@_cerberus_:

Cellular Dog is the main boss <3

@closure: I have the perfect layout of Gifs just for you ;]

@cellphonegirl: What if my enemy attacks viciously? o.o

This was really fun <3

@cellphonegirl: Dammit. I suppose I'll have to insult in some other form o.o

New one starts tomorrow, you in?