This topic is locked from further discussion.

#45101 Posted by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio

I'm tired. >_<

Moderator Online
#45102 Posted by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio
Online
#45103 Posted by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram: I'm not allowed to drink coffee. x_X

Moderator Online
#45104 Posted by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio
Online
#45105 Posted by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram: Apparently I am a hummingbird now. >_>

<_<
>drinks anyway<

Moderator Online
#45106 Edited by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio

@icarusflies: I can see it, yes you are >_> Bllehhh. Vine is DEAD!

Online
#45107 Edited by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram: I probably would be a hummingbird if I was a bird....

And I KNOW. It's really annoying. D:

I wanted feedback on my Hell Tourney post but NO ONE'S AROUND.

Moderator Online
#45108 Posted by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio

@icarusflies: I bet you cannot even hum >_>

Link me, I will give some :P

Online
#45109 Posted by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio
Moderator Online
#45110 Posted by ThisIsGonnaHurt (30177 posts) - - Show Bio

ALKDJMASKDHAKSNA

#45111 Edited by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio

@icarusflies

Well your 50% of the way to becoming a hummingbird then. ( And who the hell are you >_> I don't know alts for shhhhhii--)

@lunatic: Bud, whatever you're smoking. I want some.

Online
#45112 Posted by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio
Moderator Online
#45113 Posted by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio

@lunatic: O_O

You're in the tournament. What did you think of my post?

Moderator Online
#45114 Posted by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio

@icarusflies: Just making sure.. :P Don't wana comment and get it wrong and look like a poop >_<

Online
#45115 Posted by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram said:

@icarusflies: Just making sure.. :P Don't wana comment and get it wrong and look like a poop >_<

I just feel like you'd probably know if there was another Icarus running around. >_>

Moderator Online
#45116 Posted by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio
Online
#45117 Posted by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio
Moderator Online
#45118 Posted by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio

@icarusflies: You surprised that you write well? *leans back* Don't go all "Ohh I am not that good" on me.

Online
#45119 Posted by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram: I was never intending to go 'oh I'm not that good', I'm awesome. :P

But that doesn't mean I don't make mistakes, and so I look for critiques.

Moderator Online
#45120 Edited by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio

@icarusflies: I write fan-fiction remember. I know exactly what you are saying :P

Online
#45121 Posted by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram: Great! So is there anything I need to fix/keep in mind for the future regarding that post?

Moderator Online
#45122 Edited by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio
Online
#45123 Posted by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio
Moderator Online
#45124 Posted by ThisIsGonnaHurt (30177 posts) - - Show Bio

@icarusflies:

A tad lengthy and artsy near the beginning.

But overall, you're gold.

#45125 Posted by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio

@lunatic: Awesome, thanks.

I suspected as much. >_>

Moderator Online
#45126 Posted by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio

@icarusflies: o_o If I was AmazingAngel right now. I would be very very scared. How long did that post take you? woah xD Supertastic.

The start KINDA felt a little draggy though ( Not the right word..Just..Too much introduction ) , like - It was not written bad, but just sometimes getting right into the murder carnage is the best thing >_< ( After an intro, as you did ) , But yeah, I cannot really give any fair criticism as I would not do any better. Honestly I enjoyed it and now look forward to see if AmazingAngel can match it or beat it :P

But you did set the scene perfectly. So , maybe not getting into the fighting as quick WAS the correct move. As it can now allow the reader to understand everything better.

@amazingangel Zaniel wishes you luck, you're gona need it >:D

Online
#45127 Edited by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram: I dunno...like, an hour, hour and a half? And thank you!!!!!!

I totally understand what you mean by the draggy thing, I do need to work on jumping into things. My writing can be a bit like the equivalent of very slowly getting into a swimming pool full of sharks. It's cold, and it takes a bit to get started, but then it's a bloodbath. >_>

Thank you for your critique, I very much appreciate it. :)

Moderator Online
#45128 Posted by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio

@icarusflies:

Neat. That concentration is good xD

Like you set the scene perfectly, but then their is a difference from setting the scene and making it drag out for the sake of "detail" as some do.

Hey, I have done Fan-Fics and gotten replys like "Good" or "Nice job"

And I am like....How the hell am I going to improve with that? lol

Online
#45129 Posted by Icarusflies (12503 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram: No, that was without concentration. I kept getting distracted, the actual writing was probably more like half an hour, maybe 20 minutes.

I'm not sure whether you're saying I'm good or need less detail. >_>
Ugh, I KNOW, right??!?! That's just the worst! Like, I wrote all this for you, you could at LEAST give me more than three words. :P

Moderator Online
#45130 Posted by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio

@icarusflies:

ohh ok xD

Let me put it this way as somebody put it to me at the start of my FanFic journey.

Take away the volume. But add intensity.

So simply, Less words but more detail.

So even simpler. Quality over quantity.

Capiche?

Online
#45131 Edited by AmazingAngel (4121 posts) - - Show Bio

@icarusflies: Thinking about writing a really long post in there now.

With flash backs and descriptions and what ifs.

@pyrogram: Of course he does, Angel still needs to meet Ethan as well.

#45132 Posted by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio
Online
#45133 Edited by AmazingAngel (4121 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram:

O.K. whatever, now we gonna do some more Angel Alliance, I'm bored outta my mind here.

#45134 Edited by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio

@amazingangel: Forgot about that! Link me and I will do my reply lol

Online
#45135 Posted by AmazingAngel (4121 posts) - - Show Bio
#45136 Posted by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio
Online
#45137 Posted by saviour (826 posts) - - Show Bio
#45138 Edited by Surkit (11537 posts) - - Show Bio

I hope its this nice out all weekend

Online
#45139 Edited by Maya_Liafador (4381 posts) - - Show Bio

@surkit: SOMEONE's got a DAAAAAATE

#45140 Edited by Surkit (11537 posts) - - Show Bio

@maya_lopez: lol yup yup. Might be warm enough to hit the BW.

Online
#45141 Edited by Embargo (209 posts) - - Show Bio
#45142 Posted by Feral Nova (46639 posts) - - Show Bio

because I love waking up to the sound of my sister crying -_-

#45143 Edited by EdwardWindsor (14428 posts) - - Show Bio

I'am back, and mighty cold. It snowed again "welcome to british summer"

#45144 Edited by EdwardWindsor (14428 posts) - - Show Bio
#45145 Posted by Pyrogram (38446 posts) - - Show Bio
Online
#45146 Edited by EdwardWindsor (14428 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram: We have none at mo been winter for 6 months.

#45147 Edited by Feral Nova (46639 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram said:

@feral_nova: Hey, Be grateful for waking up. You could have been hit by a bullet. 0_o

Might as well have been! I got hit in the head with a shoe -_-

I freaked out because I heard her crying so i got up, ran over to her and she yells at me to get out and throws her damn shoe! Then I walk over to the kitchen to get some water (now mind I just woke up, freaked out cause idk what the hell was going on so I look like sh!t) and who do I see in the living room? Her damn boyfriend... AND his brother! >_< I swear I'm going to kick his @ss!

#45148 Edited by Aiden Cross (15569 posts) - - Show Bio

@feral_nova: Uh oh... >_>... That's not a good situation to be. Especially being caught in the middle.

#45149 Posted by Tellumo (511 posts) - - Show Bio

I just pressed the one of the AA buttons, s#it got real, real fast... O.o

#45150 Edited by Feral Nova (46639 posts) - - Show Bio