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Deadpool caught the familiar smell of the teleporter on his belt reemerge from nowhere into the mercenary hangout, the Hellhouse. He felt his wounds from the job slowyly reheal and heard the noise only he could hear as tendons sewed themselves up. He thought back to where he got these powers, his crazed father, and the tortures he had to endur. His mother...
"Honey I'm home!!!" He tunefully let out, taking a step and dripping blood from his black-ops boots on the floor.
"Hey Wade!" Bob nervously said.
"Hey Bob! How's everyones favorite house pet?"
"Fine I guess."
Deadpool approached Patch who was sitting in a booth looking at the mission log computer.
"Did you get the money?" He anxiously asked.
"Yeah, yeah. Twenty-three dead guards, five dead cyborgs, and one sniped out CEO. Here's your money you tight wad!" He layed down the brief case and let Patch take his share.
Afterwards, he walked over to the table where he and Weasel usually sat for a cold one in the lunchroom area. Deadpool plopped himself down on the chair.
"Hey, Weas!" He said pulling out a wad of cash for Weasel. "Here's your split."
"Thanks Wade." Weasel looked uncomfortable.
Deadpool proceeded to take out his high powered sniper rifle and his spiked knuckle graspers. He unsheathed his blood soaked Katana and inspected it.
"I need more fuel for the gas powered sniper rifle," he said. "I pumped up all of the gas for one shot. You should have saw his head explode, it looked like a volcano! Except volcanos don't have guts!" He said while wiping his katana with a clothe. "The new automatics performed well." He continued as he checked his sidearm for any smudges of bloodstains.
"Good Wade." Weasel strained.
"What is the matter Weasel?" Deadpool asked. "Did you hit puberty? I can tell you a thing or two. Never..." Deadpool stopped. He looked over Weasel and spotted a familiar face.
"Assassination." He mumbled. "Trying to get my weapons deadler again?" He reached for his knife.
Assassination turned to face him. "No,no,no Wade. I was only having a conversation."
"That's all it had better been." Deadpool replied. "I wouldn't want to have to beat your @$$ again."
"Whatever Wade" Assassination responded.
Deadpool carried on and Weasel lightened up to see they were done.
Deadpool then ordered up a bottle of whiskey from Blind Al and looked at his mission tracker.
"Hmmm. It looks like we got some newbies here today on the announcements."
"Yeah, they are supposedly pretty good. " Weasel replied.