Talk Show

Today on the Dr. Phil show, I'll be taking the reins. Thanks to Dr. Phil for allowing me to host today, and welcome everyone.

::applause::

::applause::

Today's topic.
My daughter has gone crazy and I don't know what to do!

OOHHHH!

Let's roll the clip

::whispers::
That child needs to get her act together

"Dr. Phil said:

"Hawk said:

"Ah Dr. Phil, I've got a problem........sob sob. My husband doesn't want to have sex with me. -Nealda in Rhode Island
"

Alright Nealda....

Crew, can we get a picture of Nealda put up on the screen please?"

"

I'll say one thing. That is messed up.
Coming up next on the Dr. Phil, My baby is fat and I don't know what to do.

::whispers::

Ooooooooohhhh that child needs to put down the pizza and pick up a carrot!

Yay! Woooo! Hurrah!

::whispers::

is the show over? is that it?

"::whispers::

is the show over? is that it?"

Welcome to the Joan Rivers show!

Today we have the shock-rock band Gwar!

"Next time on the Dr. Phil show...........
Gambler, a man who is named after his own addiction. Will he ever stop or ruin his life at the card table. "

::whispers::
Aw hell no, they're animals! A disgrace to music!

Next up we have a very funny guy. He's the host of Pee Wee's playhouse.... PEE WEE HERMAN!

"Today we have the shock-rock band Gwar!

  

"

::waits in line::

""I am not afraid of the man-hating monsters on my television screen... but if I see one in real life, I will RUN LIKE HELL"

the door swings open and in walks the horrible monster

NO NO! i'm not ready NO! runs away to WAL"

Yeah Um I have a problem... I'm a guy, and theres this other guy that keeps sayin he loves me of course at first I though he was playing, but today he bought me some 100 dollar shoes..
I am worried now, HELP

::sits down::

Hi people. Welcome to the Tyrone Biggums show!

Today, we're gonna talk about an important subject...

CRACK!

mmph mph mpmmph mkph

" This is the place where we do shows about relationships, paternity tests, and settle other disputes here on the vine.

audience applauds "

Can we talk?!

I know it's been a very long time since we've been on the air. What can I say? That was one LONG commercial break!

::laughter::

::applause::

Da fuq

Ha

We've got an incredibly interesting show tonight. But since it's been so long, I want to know what's on your mind?

How did you remember the password

WHY WERE YOU GONE SO LONG, JOAN?

What can I say? The devil made me do it!

(If I ran a talk show I'd make people sort out their problems at gun point, they argue I shoot.)

I remember the last time this was active...ROFL.

WWWAAAHHHOOO

Step a side B-othches!

This show is about ME!

Dear lord O_O

@The_Snooki: i dont know who that woman is but shes thugly.