Dark jokes RPG: Death's smiles vs Honor Guard

Gotham city: new Arkham Asylum

Abandoned church far east of Gotham:

Recently one of the world's greatest heroes met a grueling demise at the hands of a vicious demon. The mark of his fall found the rise of other less respectable characters in society. One's who saught to take up the mantle of "The Batman" however they saw fit.The entire world stood and watched as these batmen tore through the streets of Gotham delivering there corrupted sense of justice for the sake of avenging there fallen hero. The very city they sought to defend found itself being pulled deeper and deeper into the endless dark pit and without no way to stop it these batmen changed. No longer avengers but revengers, venting there rage on any organism they came across becoming the very thing they fought against. And with no one to put an end to there madness Gotham was on the verge of collapse. Until one man stepped in. A batman who was true to the original. He swooped in and yanked Gotham out of the bottomless pit with all his might and has become the premier defender of truth, honor, and justice.

Honor Guard found himself on the rooftop of the Gotham Gazette battling with ten of the many batmen that ran the streets of Gotham on nights such as this. He hadn't slept in days. A full moon hung high in the dark sky as the dreary haze of midnight swept over Gotham. His vibranium suit glisten as the moon light relfected off its jet black color. His cape and cowl wre the same color and his white chin as well as his pink lips were the only things that could be seen. There was faint white glow emanating from the eyeslits of the cowl and a yellow utility belt hung from his waist. The Arcane Knight was swift and strong. Incapacitating his foes with devastating bone crunching strikes. As the last man stood face to face with the Arcane Knight he cowered in fear. The Guard grabbed him by the shoulders holding him over the edge of the 60 story high building. His screams could be heard for blocks as he begged James not to hurt him. "Please! We were just supposed to be a distraction! The guy, he looked like the Joker but... darker and-and more serious. He told us ta-ta keep ya-ya distracted why he "took out the trash." Thats all I know, you gotta believe me!" The malice in Honor Guard's eyes said he wasn't buying it. Tears began to roll down the man's cheeks as he wet himself from pure fright. "M, come in." The man's sobbing became heavy breaths as the Guard began to speak. "M here. Looks like he wasn't lying. Got a distress signal coming from Arkham Asylum, thats got to be it." Honor looked back at the pathetic with a less frightening look. Taking in a whiff of the air he caught the smell of fresh urine and his face srcunched up. With one arm he tossed the man back onto the rooftop and threw to him a paper napkin. "Clean yourself up kid."

Diving off the rooftop he began freefall, the wind bashing against his cape. About 20 stories up he pulled his grappling gun from his utility belt and took aim a lightpost. With precision he shot the grappling hook and as it latched on to the pole Honor guard's moementum shifted forward and swung into a dark alley. A young boy watching from his wondow was bedazzled by this impressive feat and as Honor Guard sprang out from the alley on his Honorcycle the boy was astonished uttering this single word as a form of expression. "Woah." The guard tore through the streets of Gotham at 120 miles per hour, zipping in between cars trying to reach his destination. During his life he'd heard tales of the Joker and his mass murders and how a figure dressed as a bat would take him down and imprison him in the very same Asylum HG was headed too. But what would the Joker mean by taking out the trash is the question that plagued Wilson's thoughts, driving up to the gate of the famed insanity ward.

The gates swung open with an eerie creak and the Honorcycle lay parked out front as James walked up the miniscule hill to the asylum itself. Gargoyles seemed to be a theme as two lay beside the metal door of the asylum and many others ran around the top of the building. The black brick the windowless building sense of no escape which is what a place with such a hostory would be going for. As the doors swung open Honor was greeted by the chief of police for Gotham, Ben Gordon. "Nice suit. Looks good on you. I'm--" Honor Guard interjected immediately. "Ben Gordon. Chief of Gotham PD. What we got here?" Gordon nodded and a small smile crept upon his aged features. "Just as sharp I see. And straight to the point. Seems at about 11:30 the Joker started laughing maniacally. A regular thing for him but this time it was different. tHe laughs weren't the kind you usually get from him. They're more like whimpers or cries for help. The guards say they heard him muttering things to himself too. and by the time they opened up his cell to investigate this is what they found."

Yellow tape was all over the cell painted with blood. As James stepped inside he found a mangled joker laying on the ground his head nearly disconnected from his neck. Cuts ran all across his forehead and one of his eyeballs had been gouged out. When you look at his chest one could see pieces of bone protruding from it and a large hole lay where his entire stomach used to be. The white finger were strewn around him one laying inside the orifice that his eye once held residence and his legs were contorted and twisted. While Gordon grimaced at the site of it, covering his eyes Honor Guard analyzed the body trying to draw conclusions from it. "Video feeds?" He questioned as he stepped in for a closer look. "All we got was the moment he started laughing then they blank out. Oh and I almost forgot. There was a set of directions left here. To some old church in Gotham on the eastside. I've sent some men to investigate. But I'm sure you'd do a better job then--" Honr Guard was gone, sprinting down the hill and jumping on his honorcycle. Off to the old Church. Hardworking civilian lives were at stake and there was no time to waste meanwhile Gordon stood at the crime scene smiling once again. "Oh. He's good."

Pulling up in front of the Church he activated the X-Ray lense. Peering inside he found a ten civilians hanging from a rope tied to the ceiling of Church. The ropes led to the pipes of the instrument known as an organ, used for church songs. Mirrors hung around the people and on the stump near the organ sat an average sized man with white skin and green hair. So far this didn't look good at all and from the outside he couldn't make out much so James stepped through the twin arched doors. Once inside the cathedral he heard a dark rambuncious voice echo throughout the area as he walked through the main aisle up towards the man on the stump.

  “Welcome to a nightmare.” 

       
      

“Welcome to your nightmare.”    

The voice of the darkest Joker echoed all over the empty dusty church like the voice of a distant ghost that could give a shill to the spine of the very gods.  Looking over his shoulder with a large smile Miles notice the presence of one of the cape crusaders that now roam the city. “Ah.” he exclaims as he stands to his feet and turns around facing the standing Batman. “How thrilling a Batman has come out to play my game.” Although his humor is intact the red glowing glare of the dark clown reveals that this Joker is not exactly like the original.. There is something more than just witty humor.

The prince of chaos then remembers as he gasps  and runs up over the organ climbing to the middle pipes as he giggles in joy. He finally reaches the pipes and putting his elbow on one of the pipes and leaning on it he looks at the Bat. “Now Bat-youngness. I would like to give you a prediction of a near future.” Miles closes his eyes and lift both his hands as he “predicts the future” “I see.. I see a failing Bat-fake acknowledging his defeat while kneeling before the new lord of darkness.. begging for the lives of the innocent that are hanging from the ropes. This predicted event will happen before this night is done ladies and gentlemen, sit tight and enjoy the humility of the Batman. For you see is the only way the innocents will walk out of here alive tonight. Kekeke.”

Springing one of ten ropes with his finger the new clown looks at the Batman who appears to be not amused by the circus act of Miles. “Ooh, you Bats are all the same aren’t you? Serious to the end… Umm, what? Is it that you don’t understand what is happening? If so, let me explain.. Each rope that you see wrapped to a pipe is carrying on the other end a civilian suspended over one hundred feet from the ground. I cut it and WAMB! One innocent splatters on the pavement and into your conscious for life Batsy.” The new Joker then from his sleeve like an art of magic he makes a Joker card appear on his hand as he addresses the Bat between laughter “Allow me a demonstration, Bat-brain.” Heartless like a butcher the prince of chaos lift his arm into the air and with joy on his laughter he slices one of the ropes! The rope snaps and quickly is been drawn by the weight of the body of a civilian as in the background the voice of a young girl is heard screaming as she falls “What’s it going to be, HERO?!” rejoiced  the clown prince of chaos as just stood back watching and wondering if he would see any heroics from the new Batman.  

The man rolled around on the stump with a large smile across his white skin. Everything about him was darker than the original Joker from the way his shoulders lay to the tone of his voice. Glancing at his hands honor focused on his fingernails. There was dry blood caked up inside. This was the man who slaughtered the Joker in his cell. Glancing to the right he studied the people that hung from the ropes. Trying to devise a plan on how to release them. But the imposter's speech interrupted his thoughts. “Ah. How thrilling a Batman has come out to play my game.” A devilish grin replaced the happy go lucky one he'd held earlier.  As the imposter stood up James analyzed him He was about 5'9" and weighed a little over 125. His purple suit looked like something straight out of the Joker's wardrobe closet and if this was any indication he'd probably have some of his tricks too.

As the too stared each other down in utter silence the galavanting criminal let out a gasp and skipped over to the organ pipe. Wrapping himself around it like a fireman on a pole. He began to giggle a bit before placing his elbow on the pipe and leaning over it. Meeting Wilson's dark gaze once again. “Now Bat-youngness. I would like to give you a prediction of a near future.” The clown closed his eyes and raised both his hands in the air as he began to relay his prediction to all who could hear. “I see.. I see a failing Bat-fake acknowledging his defeat while kneeling before the new lord of darkness.. begging for the lives of the innocent that are hanging from the ropes. This predicted event will happen before this night is done ladies and gentlemen, sit tight and enjoy the humility of the Batman. For you see is the only way the innocents will walk out of here alive tonight. Kekeke.”

Honor Guard was impressed and his face told the clown that as he stared thumbing one of the strings connected to the organ pipe. “Ooh, you Bats are all the same aren’t you? Serious to the end… Umm, what? Is it that you don’t understand what is happening? If so, let me explain.. Each rope that you see wrapped to a pipe is carrying on the other end a civilian suspended over one hundred feet from the ground. I cut it and WAMB! One innocent splatters on the pavement and into your conscious for life Batsy.” And after the imposter shook his sleeve, a joker playing card fell from it and into his hand.  “Allow me a demonstration, Bat-brain.” With crazed laughter the clown cuts right through the rope. His cackling could not drown out the muffled cries of a little girl as she plummeted to her death. “What’s it going to be, HERO?!” The insane clown bellowed as Honor Guard retrieved his grappling gun from his side. With precise aim he shot the hook at a scaffolding on the ceiling of the church. It wrapped around the scaffolding  and began to recline pulling Honor Guard into the air. Swinging his legs forward Honor began to slide towards the girl as she fell to the ground. Detaching the hook he jettisoned forward catching the girl. As he fell to the ground his boots absorb the shock of hitting the ground so heavily. He placed the little girl on the ground, untying her and taking the duct tape off of her mouth. Soon as James stood up he sent a  honorang saucering towards the clown's head. "The names Honor Guard." 

The clown prince of chaos watch as the new Batman embraces his heroic title and launch himself after the falling civilian. Meanwhile the clown ran behind the organ and grabbed a bag with an awkward shape apparently in the bottom it had some sort of  flat round object and like Santa Claus he wave the bag to the back of his left shoulder as he saw the hero land holding the little girl. “Oooh my heeero. Pwa-Ha-aha!” rejoice the clown, but just then the  Bat launches an attack; One of the Bat family’s famous boomerangs gasping surprised the prince of chaos ducks and watches the honorang go right over him and clash against the organ pipes. “The name is honor guard” the clown glared as the Honor Guard had interrupted his laughter and had tried to use the opportunity to attack him. “That would have been a cheap-shot, BATMAN! Allow me to retaliate. You liker poker? Humhhahhaha” thrusting his arms fort out of his sleeves like a machine gun a barrage of metal Joker playing cards shoot out heading toward the Honor Guard and the girl.

“You see, Honor-Batsy. This joker is nothing like the original, I don’t do tricks…..” pausing as he reaches into the bag a cracking sound fills the room as his whole arm disappears into the bag, then when the caliph of clowns pulled his arm out of the bag he had somehow summoned an Uzi from the bag as he loudly rejoins “I believe in real magic!” the harlequin of chaos then sprayed the full magazine of the sub machine gun at the honor guard as his demonic laughter filled the background of the racket coming from the Uzi. The sub machine gun smoking after been emptied is dropped to the floor as the clown again reaches into the bag and this time summons a crowbar. “Surprised Guard-man? At first it was a doozy.. But once they are mastered my powers are…. Satisfying.. So satisfying that its almost worth the eternal oblivion that awaits me in hell” said the clown before waving his bag to the back of his shoulder once more.. "There is no escape.. Bat-fake, you will not walk away from here alive." stated the new clown prince of crime.

The crazed clown sprinted behind the organ and grabbed a large round bag, hefting it over the shoulder like a knapsack. Honor Guard stood placing the little girl on the ground, her body shivering from cold fear. “Oooh my heeero. Pwa-Ha-aha!” The maniac teased as he the girl eyed Honor Guard. His insane cackling stopped as he watched the honorang fly towards him and with impressive speed ducked to avoid injury. His facial expression changed and the clown seemed disturbed by Honor Guard hasty attack.  “That would have been a cheap-shot, BATMAN! Allow me to retaliate. You liker poker? Humhhahhaha”  With a flick of his wrist and a jolt of his arms a battailon of razor sharp deadly playing cards raced towards James and the girl. He quickly hefted her up  and dove into the seating area. The cards crashed into the wall, lodging themselves in the crevices. Immediately Honor Guard rose up telling the girl to make for the door and call the police. She complied and with the sound of the door slamming his attention was placed back on the clown, though he'd not completely forgotten about the 9 others still hanging from the ceiling. They could'nt be dealt with yet safely, Honor Guard would have to immobolize this foe before he could let them down.

“You see, Honor-Batsy. This joker is nothing like the original, I don’t do tricks…..”  He ceased speech only to dig through his bag of tools and pull out an machine gun. It surfaced with a clicking sound meaning the safety was off. Realizing the killing potential of this weapon Honor moved in with the intent of relinquishing the killer of such device before he could do substantial damage. “I believe in real magic!” The bullets sprayed and Honor Guard, in a dazzling display of acrobatics, flipped and twirled around while closing the distance between the two. His vicious laughter resonated once again through the halls but Honor Guard's scanners could pick up the sirens. The police we're on there way so all the Arcane Knight needed to do was entertain this crazed murder and keep the hostages alive. The Uzi, clip wasted was cast aside as the devilish man wrenched a crowbar from his bag seeking to do some damage to the Cardinal Crusader. “Surprised Guard-man? At first it was a doozy.. But once they are mastered my powers are…. Satisfying.. So satisfying that its almost worth the eternal oblivion that awaits me in hell” If what he said was true then Honor Guard was in for a helluva battle and so was the Gotham PD. As he rolled the bag over his shoulder he issued as threat to the Arcane Knight. "There is no escape.. Bat-fake, you will not walk away from here alive." The gap closed Honor Guard let loose a fast three strike combo consisting of a left hook driving to the jaw then a right cross aimed at the left eye socket and a spinning jump kick towards the temple to finish it off. After the combo Honor Guard leapt back and tossed two smoke pellets at the villain. The gas spread covering the majority of the church as James activated his sonar vision. The sirens blaired and the police were closing in on the church, six cars in total. Soon the murderer would be outnumbered, but whos favor would the odds be tipped in? Had alerting the police only caused more lives to be risked in this war between madmen?    

The legacy of the Bat was in good hands as the newest holder of the torch made way and evaded the two waves of deadly projectiles. The civilian had left the premises and this amused the deadly clown as he approached the Bat holding the crowbar “Ah! Very good Bat-boy, you saved the little girl.. Only nine to go, kekekekehehe.”  all the sudden as the laughter of the clown filled the room the guard then attacked landing a straight hook to the surprised clown “Ugffh!” cough the clown as his head was jerked backward “OHooho, that really hurt!” the new prince of crime then saw a second first coming at him and he manage to duck and slide on the floor avoiding the fist. The clown maybe underestimating the guard he waves his lifted index finger while he stated  “No, no, no. I never fall for the same trick, Batman!” “Huh?” But then from the Bat a third attack was launched and nailed the Clown on the head that made the clown twirl and slam on the floor as he dropped the bag and the crowbar.

Groaning in pain while holding his head the clown still was slowly struggling to get to his feet as he spoke “Ughh.. You… You are a sneaky one aren’t you?” Struggling he finally stands to his feet as a revolting bloody face glares at the honor guard.  The clown looks at his bag and notice shards all around it the bag. “Look at that.. You broke my mirror, Batsy. You know what that means?” The clown was raising his arm as he was apparently going to attack with his Jokers barrage while screaming “That’s seven years of bad luck!” but all the sudden the Honor Guard leaped backwards and launch several smoke pellets at the flinching prince of chaos

The smoke moved quickly spreading through all the church, the clown was looking around for the provider of the pellets as he tries to speak between the effects of the gas “*Cough, cough* Ooh, that old trick- *coughing and wheezing* - You- *Cough* you know the problem with inhaler, Honor Guard?” All the sudden the clown seems to refines and with a smile on his face he takes a deep breath and exhales as his eyes glow red and he lets out a slow evil laugh. “Ha-ha-ha… I’ve Inhale the fire and brimstone from the bottomless pit, Batsy your biological warfare wont work for long. Hahahhaheheheaha!” suddenly looking at his crowbar (which was on the floor) the clown leaps into the air and slams on the floor grabbing it then from the floor sitting up he launches the crowbar at impossible speeds going for Honor Guard’s head.

“Medics! HAHAHHHAA!” joked the clown as the got back to his feet with a bloody smile on his face. “Uhh, lets see, what else do I have?” the clown search his pockets and feints as he couldn’t find what he was looking for. Then all the sudden as if an idea would of pop into his head he smiles as he raises his finger and reaches into his coat. “I’m ready to try and hit the bell.” on the inside of his coat Miles had shards of mirrors which provide him to use his multidimensional powers and achieved a weapon of choice… Miles pulls out of his coat a very epic size red and yellow strong man hammer. Jokers holds it with both hands as he draws a cocky smile on his face glaring at Hopnor Guard “You’ve been a very, very, VERY naughty bat-boy! HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!” Miles lifting the heavy hammer as he runs toward Honor Guard he reach proximity and then like maniac he swings the hammer hopping to crush Honor Guard and anything bellow the impact zone. “That was a smash! HA-HA-HA!”