CV RPG True Facts - If Gambler Won the Presidency

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deactivated-57916056a8182

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1 - Applications to get White House press credentials have have two questions: Are you female Y/N and are you blonde Y/N, those with two Y's are accepted.

2 - White House has a combination panic room / bachelor pad installed at presidential request for discrete liasons.

3 - His stance on diplomacy with each country is solely based on how hot the women are in his opinion. Being rebuffed in an advance is considered a fully acceptable reason to enact sanctions and/or declare war on their home country.

4 - His first military engagement is conquering France just to have the Army Corps of Engineers install anti-gravity devices to ship it to space. It just feels right to him for some reason.

5 - Wins the state of Utah in a landslide as he finds the practice of polygamy to be not only legal but his preferred status quo

6 - Hail to the Chief is replaced by a Jay Z penned and performed dis track about his defeated political opponents as his entrance music.

7 - Orders the recruitment of a much more expansive protective detail to deter the many people wanting to kill him...especially his own family.

8 - Holds marathon watching sessions of House of Cards for his staff to help them develop the relentless nature and cold killer instinct he is looking for from them.

9 - Explicitly demands that he is not referred to as the 45th President of the United States, but as the First and Only him.

10 - Lasts about three weeks in the Oval Office before being taken down in a scandal involving: married women, single women, women he is the cause of divorce, assassination plots, political backstabbing gone wrong, a pet cheetah, invading Cuba for cigars, pimp-slapping the smug look off Putin's face on national TV, and ninja sneaking into North Korea just to let Kim Jong Un know he really ain't shit.

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Maverick_6

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*Maverick starts devising gambler contingencies.*

*Argus prepares for bashing*

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The Psyentist

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*infiltrates with all the blondes... because I literally stockpile them*

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Cassius_Knightfall

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lol i will have mine up tomorrow. But who will it be about ....

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_Drake

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A broom with a blonde wig could get a job easier than a brunette. #fact

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deactivated-5cd6e53f65ed0

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I'm framing this

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_Dirge_

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This made me chuckle lol.

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Cassius_Knightfall

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I gave up after 6 lol

  1. Pretty much all of the candidates will actually harm you if they say "vote or die".
  2. One unnamed candidate was hit with a cease and desist order for using lines from the west wing
  3. A planned march on a blue elephant was cancelled after the creature drunk the paint and passed out.
  4. Plans to arrange the next round of debates in Hawaii have raised the eyebrows of taxpayers
  5. Air force one to be renamed Air Jordan
  6. If Warsman won the vote he would no sell it and demand a recount.
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Damien_Bonaparte

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LMAO this is a master piece of comedy

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deactivated-5cd6e53f65ed0

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I think I actually was Prez in Prime. Twice if not mistaken :D

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The Psyentist

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I think I actually was Prez in Prime. Twice if not mistaken :D

Dayum. No wonder we jumped ship for the nU. ;) Hehe. Kidding.

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NighThunder

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I think I actually was Prez in Prime. Twice if not mistaken :D

So thaaats why CV prime was rebooted

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NighThunder

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#12  Edited By NighThunder

That ninja though lol

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The Psyentist

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That ninja though lol

Telepathy. OP as f*ck. Stealing your... wait for it... THUNDER.

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deactivated-5cd6e53f65ed0

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The Psyentist

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#15  Edited By The Psyentist