What stupid and funny things have you done when drunk?

The thread is simple. Tell us what stupid and funny things you've done while under the influence of alcohol. Amuse us with tales of your youthful indiscretion. Let's all have a little laugh :D

I will start by saying that I got so drunk I couldn't find my house, despite being right in front of it. It was so bad that I fell asleep on the staircase to my door lol. Luckily my friend came to check on me and managed to drag me into the house. Thank God she came because it was freezing cold that night and I would have probably died D:

Destroyed peoples property....and robbed them

@omgomgwtfwtf: What is the appropriate cut off point for stories in this thread ?

@pyrogram a thread for me.

@lykopis I know your not the biggest fan of my drunken freshman antics, so umm watch this space >:D

@laflux: Fact. Go get drunk in it! Ohhh...

This is my last night of being sober lolz, then, well even I don't know O_O

@laflux:

Got a girl preggo

All of it.

Uh I don't think I should say

Lie to my mom about drinking.

I've only been drunk once and even then I wasn't that bad. Nothing against it but I'm just not much of a drinker.

The red wedding.

My bad, guys.

My bad.

@innervenom123: i'm traumatized...

You Know what, f*ck it, what have I got to lose...............

Generic Stuff Mostly

Kicked Out for getting in an arguement with a bouncer- no physical blows though

Morning after no memory of the last 15 hours- lost all my belongings and got thrown out of a taxi because I was sick in it apparently. Ended up lying in the corridor, stripped to the waist. Apparently my room mate tried to drag me to my room, but I said I wanted to stay out and look for fairies.

Nearly got arrested for relieving myself in an alleyway, fortunately let off with a caution

More Embarrassing

Caught red-handed making out with someone else girlfriend. Had no idea to be honest at first, until she said forgot she had one for tonight. My response, was I think, I'll forget you told me. What she didn't tell me was that she brought her boyfriend to the same club. Fireworks ensue. I'm pretty sure they are not together anymore.

Simply put- meet nice girl. Make out with the nice girl, exchange phone number, ask to come home with me. Girl Agrees, goes to use toilet. I wait, and wait, and wait. Eventually meet another nice girl, and repeat process, up to use toilet bit. Then first girl comes up to me and large arguement ensues. Que taxi for one, and lonely Kebab...

My Ultimate moment of shame though, is coded.

Fish Fingers on a dance-floor.......... I'll leave it at that >.> <.<

@pyrogram the stacks have been raised.......................

@pyrogram: With that GIF you have just told me that's was drinking to forget Superman 3 and 4....and depending on who you ask Returns as well

@laflux: I one up you - Nearly tipped a police van over while raving INSIDE of it ( Long Story for a PM >_> ) . That was not a fakin nice day.

Nothing, I don't drink.

I think this constable want to perform an inspection with you in the police van..........................

Also doubles up as a tips hat gesture :P

@laflux: Trust if she was in the police van I would have never left >_>

@laflux: I would say anything goes, as long as it fits within the rules lol. Don't want this thread locked over obscene material D:

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.......... My new favorite thread! Where to start? I wore roller skates in an Agent Orange mash pit. Me and friend stole a traffic light during Hurricane Katrina. I let some girl pee on top of my car, she slip, fell off, and landed ass first in some broken glass. Had a one night stand with a one legged girl. Fell in a ditch more than once. Skinny dipped away from the police. Me and this girl ate a lot of bad chinese food, threw it up in a box of wine (we filled it up) and mailed to some dude's house. I got two of my co-workers so drunk one of them punched two cops and the other one ran a car in a liquor store. Hang on I have more coming............

Its probably a pet peeve of mine, but why would you come onto the thread just to say that?

Mainly because I'm trying to past my brother up in Off-Topic post,me and him have a sibling rivalry going on so I need all the post I could get. =P

@dccomicsrule2011: Oh then, carry on :P

Let's keep on drinking and telling stories!!

Okay, here is another story about my alcohol-induced adventures. I nearly died on my 19th birthday after consuming Purple Drank (cough syrup + booze) and Ecstasy. I went into a seizure and began foaming at the mouth. Supposedly the Ecstasy was laced with piperizine, which dealers use to cut their product, and it doesn't mix well with the stuff in cough syrup.

However, being the foolish retard that I am. I still do both things in unison. But instead, I use Molly instead of Ecstasy :P

@laflux: Maybe others might feel peer pressure to play along even though they don't drink, plus it's not bad to see the other side of things. :]

@dccomicsrule2011: You don't want to drink anyways, you might miss LeMVP leading the Heat to back to back titles! =D

Really, I don't think these stories are stuff to aspire too lol..............

I really just ralph when I get drunk way more often than I should. It's nature's stopping point :)

@laflux: I don't know, Pyro's told me about some crazy stuff he's done. >.>

Nothing horrible. Sometimes I've called people and told them how much I love them. But I'm a pretty loving drunk.

I've never gotten drunk to the point where I consider doing genuinely horrible things

I would not want to miss it for nothing in the world =P

- pissed the bed of a girl who i met earlier that night

- sexed a transgender in the butt in thailand

- ran out before paying in a hooker room

- stepped on my dog

- showed my wiener pictures to all the female workers in my office

O__o

I never drink... But I saw close people doing things they wouldn't do if not under alcohol influence that I would rather not remember.

unspeakable evil. My gawd, the shit I've gotten away with while drunk. I must have a golden horseshoe stuck up my ass.

got pretty drunk off of some mixed drinks my buddy had made...then decided that i knew what i was doing and continued to make mixed drinks for myself with random alcohol lol. i remember mixing Kahlua, peppermint schnapps, and ginger ale. that was the first and only time that i've ever gotten completely wasted..just stick with beer now..

Got into fights for no reason.

Throw beer bottles against the wall in bars.

Talk sh*t to random people.

Nothing straight up HORRIBLE, but I've done my fair share of stupid crap while drunk as hell.

Lost my virginity

Changing the title of this thread from horrible things to stupid things. Stupid things sounds more inclusive and less horrific :)

Party on people! Stay classy :P

Woke up in bed with a midget, a donkey, and a clown.

...............................I could get with the midget, but the rest though? You're on your own there

all kinds of nasty stuff. more light-hearted story, i passed out and peed my pants just before the plane was ready for boarding.

@white_mage: Yeah, that midget, he was super hairy. The constant honking sound while the clown gave oral got annoying.

Ugh, I HATE airlines............leave a flaming bag of crap at the terminal while you're at it...........terrorist accusations be damned

...................and things...............turned.................ugly