The Embarrassment Thread

Talk about your most embarrassing and epic fail moments here. Moments that stuck with you from years, months, weeks or even days ago.

I'll start:

Back when I was in year 7, the teachers (we had two teachers because it was a joint class) thought it best to stick us into groups for a medieval project. I went to the toilet to do my thing and when I returned, my group was having an argument with another group. I stood there for about 10 minutes trying to figure out what the argument was about. Turns out it was about a topic someone stole. Anyway long story short, I wanted to be the man in the group, so I blindly broke up the fight and in the middle of my sentence, I stopped and just started to stare at this hot as girl from the other group. I was choking up bad and almost started sweating until one of my best friends (girl) jumped in and saved the awkward tension.

When I think about it now I just wonder, "What was I doing?".

I laugh about it a little bit, but it just kind of stuck with me. The first time I literally choked.

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So, tell me your story.

Freshmen year of Highschool cell phones were banned from class. One day i wore sweats and had a boner sub teacher thought it was a cellphone came over and grabbed it. She was pretty attractive i will say.

I suggest all posts have this image added to them

@Decoy Elite: Mine would need the NSFW title

I'm gonna flip the script and post stories of me embarrassing others: I felt bad afterwards, but I don't think I was embarrassed after the fact. I think maybe the other person may have been embarrassed...

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See, I was walking back from my British Literature class to this circle in the center of my campus, where people sometimes set up campus activities...Not many students were out and about. Was listening to music on my ipod. I was also deeply engrossed in a paper I'd just gotten back that I got an A- on it....It was interesting, because my TA had thus far refused to give me an A on any of my papers. Smh. While reading and walking at the same time, I spied a pretty girl a couple feet in front of me. She was holding out hershey kisses and said something I couldn't completely make out.

I smile and respond: "No thank you" and continue walking and reading the comments left on my paper.

I walk a bit and look up... and there's another pretty girl dressed the same as the previous one. She comes at me and holds out her hands.

I say, "No thanks" assuming she's also offering hershey kisses. Start walking. She's like "Dude, wait". And I just shake my head and look back at my paper.

And she's like, " You don't want a hug" while holding her arms out and I say "no I'm good" before what she says completely sinks in.

She's says, "fine" with a bit of an attitude. And walks off kinda huffy.

At that moment, it sinks in that she was offering a hug. Hugs and kisses. What kind of douche rejects someone trying to hug them? This guy right here. I was probably the only person who did that day, you'd have to be kind of rude to reject someone trying to give out "hugs and kisses". Felt guilty for a sec. Shrugged. Said oh well, not my fault since I should have looked completely unapproachable. Went back to looking at my paper.

So yeah, might have embarrassed that girl.

@Jezer: Aww you missed out man. Someone did that once to me, and I thought she was joking around because her friends were giggling in the background. I just asked "Are you for real?" and thats either the make it or break it deal. So thats what I say if a girl attempts to try something on a total stranger. "Are you for real?"

Cool story :)

@Jezer: There is a special place in hell reserved for people who refuse hugs.

@MonsterStomp said:

@Jezer: Aww you missed out man. Someone did that once to me, and I thought she was joking around because her friends were giggling in the background. I just asked "Are you for real?" and thats either the make it or break it deal. So thats what I say if a girl attempts to try something on a total stranger. "Are you for real?"

Cool story :)

Lol I probably wouldn't ask something like "Are you for real" because that makes it seem like they're doing something absolutely crazy and might embarrass them and draw attention. Though, I guess it depends on how you say it/how loud.

I think it'd be kind of presumptuous to just go up to someone you don't know, and try to hug them. Unless there's like a reason they're doing it("Hugs and kisses")(Sign saying "Free hugs").... If not, I'd probably deny the person the hug. No matter how attractive. Lol.

Thanks.

@Jean199999 said:

@Jezer: There is a special place in hell reserved for people who refuse hugs.

I don't remember that in Dante's Inferno.... Hmmm, what's the special punishment?

On a day where my brain was particularly haywire, I once mistook the Assassin's Creed motto for a V for Vendetta line.

@Jezer said:

@MonsterStomp said:

@Jezer: Aww you missed out man. Someone did that once to me, and I thought she was joking around because her friends were giggling in the background. I just asked "Are you for real?" and thats either the make it or break it deal. So thats what I say if a girl attempts to try something on a total stranger. "Are you for real?"

Cool story :)

Lol I probably wouldn't ask something like "Are you for real" because that makes it seem like they're doing something absolutely crazy and might embarrass them and draw attention. Though, I guess it depends on how you say it/how loud.

I think it'd be kind of presumptuous to just go up to someone you don't know, and try to hug them. Unless there's like a reason they're doing it("Hugs and kisses")(Sign saying "Free hugs").... If not, I'd probably deny the person the hug. No matter how attractive. Lol.

Thanks.

@Jean199999 said:

@Jezer: There is a special place in hell reserved for people who refuse hugs.

I don't remember that in Dante's Inferno.... Hmmm, what's the special punishment?

Idk, something nasty like being forced to watch the same episode of Derrick over and over again for all eternity.

I was 14 once (once..), hanging out with my 16 yr old cousin and his hot 16 year old friends. One of the girls asked me to take the ice cube she had out of her mouth. I didn't know she meant tongue kiss her, so I stuck my dirty fingers in her mouth and pulled the icecube out, mean while she's gagging and trying to get my hand the hell out of her mouth.

@InnerAssassin said:

Freshmen year of Highschool cell phones were banned from class. One day i wore sweats and had a boner sub teacher thought it was a cellphone came over and grabbed it. She was pretty attractive i will say.

Embarrassment? Thats a win!

@Jean199999 said:

Idk, something nasty like being forced to watch the same episode of Derrick over and over again for all eternity.

Force me to watch Twilight for an eternity.

....can't think of much nastier.

@KnightRise: Ahha thanks. And did she talk to you after that? :O

@InnerAssassin: lol no never even saw the girls again

@KnightRise: Ahh sorry to hear that

On the topic of boners and hugs:

One of my good female friends had just broken up with her boyfriend a couple days past, and she'd seemed pretty down about it. Was probably feeling very vulnerable and lonely.

Anyways, I was studying with her and another good friend. Went to the kitchen of their suite to get cookies. She came in behind me and asked for a hug. Knowing what she was going through, I said yeah and decided to give her the best hug I've ever given her.

So I hug her really tight and close. You see where this is going?

The thing is....she's only like two inches shorter than me. So, we're roughly chest to chest and crotch to crotch. Oh, and she has a decently sized chest. As well as being pretty attractive.

After the first 2 seconds, I start to notice a bit of slow stirring in my loins. S l o w l y. S l o w l y. That movement picks up...I can feel it growing. She's rubbing my back. We're breathing each other in.

5 seconds in, she murmurs softly, "yesss. Thank you" and kisses me on the neck.... Not really helping the impending crisis that is my growing boner. She continues to hug me and rub my back.

Usually... I hug until the girl pulls away first. But, my trooper had just reached semi-chub status. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

7 seconds in, I start to pull away first. She holds me back, holds me close.

"No, not yet" she says.

I try to think of a valid, non awkward reason as my boner grows full fledged.

"Hug me tight. Can you give me one last, hard squeeze" she murmurs.

Uneasy, I give her one last quick squeeze...effectively poking her hard. And then pull away. She had to have felt it, if she somehow hadn't already.

Embarrassment levels are through the roof... Luckily, she spares me and defuses my embarrassment by immediately turning around and walking away. "Thank you!" she says, without a single glance.

I breath a sigh of relief, turn around, and busy myself as I wait for myself to settle down.

Was an awkward moment.

• My fourth grade class started a business of selling nachos to compete with the other class that sold hotdogs. The prettiest girl in school came back for extra cheese because she said my friend ripped her off, which he did. I went to pour her a little extra, I tripped standing still and missed the paper bowl completely. I nearly burned her arm off with delicious cheese. She didn't speak to me after that.
  We counted our earnings by the end of the year and we had enough to go to Wet n' Wild before summer break. Being the only one who showed up in flippers, I tripped head first into the wading circle. Unfortunately, I yanked the cooler full of everyone's food in with me.
  At the convention for novel, young entrepreneurs, my friend's mother asked us what we all wanted to eat after it was over. I said fettuccine alfredo before everyone else yelled pizza. Kids stared at me like I was some kind of monster.
• I got my arm stuck in a tube of plastic wrap at work. I freaked out and ran to the nearest managers. They all joked in serious tones about guys who lost their arms in plastic wrap, but I couldn't tell if they were joking and I fainted.

@InnerAssassin said:

Freshmen year of Highschool cell phones were banned from class. One day i wore sweats and had a boner sub teacher thought it was a cellphone came over and grabbed it. She was pretty attractive i will say.

Hilarious.

This post:

PAST ME WHY

• asked us what we all wanted to eat after it was over. I said fettuccine alfredo before everyone else yelled pizza. Kids stared at me like I was some kind of monster.

This has happened to me too many times, except it was a steakhouse and hooters.

@Jezer: You were about to get laid.

@Decoy Elite said:

I suggest all posts have this image added to them

Haha what is that?

@YourNeighborhoodComicGeek: Negative Man

@Decoy Elite said:

@YourNeighborhoodComicGeek: Negative Man

Oh man that so needs to be a gif.

@Jezer: Yes, sounds like she wanted some rebound fun, was probably waiting for you to make a move.

@thespideyguy said:

@Jezer: You were about to get laid.

@Bruxae said:

@Jezer: Yes, sounds like she wanted some rebound fun, was probably waiting for you to make a move.

Maybe....but

No thanks. Would never do anything with a good female friend..... that'd be kinda awkward. Let alone as a rebound.... I wouldn't take advantage of someone feeling lonely and vulnerable.

Friend zone is mutual with me. Though, two of my hispanic female friends do try to push that boundary..... Stay classy my friends.

@Jezer:

Ofcourse only you can devide what is right in the moment, but just remember.. If she/anyone dont get you, they will certainly get someone else who cares a great deal less about their feelings.

@Bruxae said:

@Jezer:

Ofcourse only you can devide what is right in the moment, but just remember.. If she/anyone dont get you, they will certainly get someone else who cares a great deal less about their feelings.

Depends on the girl, not necessarily true.

1. Maybe she just wanted to sleep with someone - anyone.

2. Maybe she wanted specifically to sleep with me.

3. Maybe she only wanted a hug and there wasn't more to it.

4. Maybe she wanted a hug that would remind her of how it felt to be held, secure, protected, and intimate like her old boyfriend probably made her feel.

5. Maybe she wanted a hug intimate and sensual enough that she would feel me get a raging boner, and it would make her feel good. It would validate to her that she was still desirable/attractive....which is what she may have needed since she'd stopped receiving that validation from having a boyfriend.

6. Maybe some combination of any of these.

So many factors. I don't think I'm ever gonna think to myself "yeah, I need to sleep with this friend because if I don't, someone who doesn't care enough about her will"....

Honestly, I don't think my friend wanted to sleep with me. I'm good friends with her best friend. Used to be best friends with her roommate. Am kind of friends with her ex-boyfriend. That would be....awkward, unless we kept it a buried secret. It was more likely a combination of 4,5, and 6.

Let me work my magic here....................

I've just finished my first semester in a university, which is well known for having a good social life so I should so much to tell.........

1. Walking across town back to were you live with glitter on your face after a night out is always slightly cringe worthy.

2. What worse is waking up with your room full of vomit and you kinda smelling like a brewery.

3. Oh drunk calls are always the hypest shizz.

4. Any video of you taken while you are inebriated is always going to be at least slightly embarrassing.

5. Or perhaps worst, recognizing that the person you had that one night stand you had with is in your degree course and tutorials.

In general Freshers just reeks of embarrassment.

Oh and not all of these are my personal experiences, I guess the fun is in trying to guess :P

@InnerAssassin: that is truly embarassing lol

I think this photo should be attached to all the comments.

@Decoy Elite: I think I earned even more respect for you for being a fan of the Mother series.

@deadpoolrules said:

I think this photo should be attached to all the comments.

I approve of this- my post is now edited.

@laflux said:

@deadpoolrules said:

I think this photo should be attached to all the comments.

I approve of this- my post is now edited.

Lol

well there was once this school party and everybody was dancing but being it is impossible to dance so I just stood there in the corner thinking I could be on the internet

@Loki9876 said:

@InnerAssassin: that is truly embarassing lol

Should have seen the teachers face mate, pricceless.

@Jezer said:

@thespideyguy said:

@Jezer: You were about to get laid.

@Bruxae said:

@Jezer: Yes, sounds like she wanted some rebound fun, was probably waiting for you to make a move.

Maybe....but

No thanks. Would never do anything with a good female friend..... that'd be kinda awkward. Let alone as a rebound.... I wouldn't take advantage of someone feeling lonely and vulnerable.

Friend zone is mutual with me. Though, two of my hispanic female friends do try to push that boundary..... Stay classy my friends.

You sound like a honorable man.

The 9 moments Of Doom

1. I was playing Table Tennis.
2. I was preparing to hit my friend very hard just for the lulz
3. I yell "HAVE AT THEE!"
4. *The ball is going at FTL speeds, someone is going to die*
5. *A old woman comes out of nowhere*
6. *Headshot*
7. I knocked out a 60-70 years old woman with a Table Tennis ball...
8. I run to the hills
9. And I will never forget that day.

@The_Lunact_And_Manic: You probably killed her man.

When I was in year 11 (16 years of age), my friend bought this mini football to school. Later that day I was feeling all boss during lunch, thought I could throw the ball over a few of the year 12 (17 years of age) girls. I threw the ball directly at the group. The ball knocked someones lunch out of their hand and I had about 5 girls evil eyeing me. I felt so bad and embarrased because they were older than me. My friend was cracking up laughing though.

I remembered what she said too: "What the f*ck dude?"

Felt so bad.

@MonsterStomp: Lol. Balls are never good dude.

BTW, I don't think she died, just K.O or else...I would be really screwed by now.

@The_Lunact_And_Manic: You KOed someone with a ping pong ball. Add that to your list of strength feats.

@MonsterStomp: I will. :P

Next time I'll try to K.O 2 people with one ping pong ball.

@laflux said:

You sound like a honorable man.

Thanks.

Two weeks ago, I went to the bar with a bunch of friends from work and they decided to invite my psycho ex. I'm quiet as ever and some forty-year-old woman decides to gamble right next to me. Eventually she asks me if we want to play some pool and I go home and grab my pool stick. I come back and we're all laughing as we played a few games. That's the last thing I remember. I woke up in my coat, gloves and everything was in place.

Apparently I had a seizure over the table and the everyone panicked. My best friend convinced the bar owner not to call the ambulance and she drove me home. Two days later, everyone in the store is asking me if I'm doing all right. After the day-shift people inquired on what happened I asked around to see who was running their mouths. I told my ex to keep my name out of her dirt mouth and she cried herself out of the morning meeting. I really didn't want anyone to know my problems at work and I think I corrected it.

That same day at the bar, the same woman from before buys me an orange julias. It was a little embarrassing, but I did get a free drink out of the mess. And maybe the free sex.

@The_Lunact_And_Manic said:

The 9 moments Of Doom

1. I was playing Table Tennis.
2. I was preparing to hit my friend very hard just for the lulz
3. I yell "HAVE AT THEE!"
4. *The ball is going at FTL speeds, someone is going to die*
5. *A old woman comes out of nowhere*
6. *Headshot*
7. I knocked out a 60-70 years old woman with a Table Tennis ball...
8. I run to the hills
9. And I will never forget that day.

I hit my best friend in the balls while playing table tennis before. I saw it hit his nuts and he went down. I was laughing so hard I didn't even check to see if he was okay, I made a b-line to the bathroom.