Posted by SOG7dc (7483 posts) 8 months, 14 days ago

Poll: So I have a girl question... (43 votes)

Text her 19%
Chill 81%

So there's this girl I asked out right...I'm really into her. Not like just a passing fancy but I really want to pursue a relationship with her. So we have a date tomorrow and we were texting for a while yesterday. So we were having a good conversation. Text sizes were matching and all that. Then out of nowhere she just stops. Now normally I wouldn't care but this girl....like I said I'm really into her. So I'm Trippin' right now. I kinda wanna text her something but I have this rule that I never, ever send two texts in a row. But damn I wanna break that rule for her....so what should I do? Go with my gut (chill out) or with my heart (text her now!)?

#1 Posted by Mitran (318 posts) - - Show Bio

wait a bit and then text tomorrow morning or something

#2 Posted by russellmania77 (15661 posts) - - Show Bio

Chill don't try to be infatuated with her or the urge will be greater, maybe text her in an hour if no response than just wait till the next day because she might be trying to make you act like this

#3 Edited by dagmar_merrill (9412 posts) - - Show Bio

I'd wait it out a bit more..

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#4 Posted by SOG7dc (7483 posts) - - Show Bio
#5 Posted by TifaLockhart (14079 posts) - - Show Bio

Think with your big head, not your other head.

#6 Edited by judasnixon (6648 posts) - - Show Bio

Two text in a row is not a weird thing. As long as you don't send her something crazy like five texts in a row. She might have a crazy rule where she can only text you back so many times without you double texting. Why don't you call her, and really talk to her. She might want to her from you.........

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#7 Edited by TazzMission (5488 posts) - - Show Bio

maybe she had to do something. also if you 2 talked that long just wait till the morning

#8 Posted by buttersdaman000 (9947 posts) - - Show Bio

Chill out.

Also, your no two text in a row thing is stupid. Playing games, and adhering to rules like this only hinder your chances with her. As long as you aren't doing some crazy sh*t, don't fret over stuff like that.

#9 Posted by SOG7dc (7483 posts) - - Show Bio

@buttersdaman000:

I appreciate the advice but "game" is why my uncle taught me since I was 9 years old. And for better or worse it's worked wonders for me before. He used to say "we're all in the game whether we like it or not. The ones who say they aren't playing are either the best players or the ones getting played the worst." Basically it's like a family thing. We "pass the game down" generations. Part of my "game" is I have text rules, interpersonal rules etc. I legit could write a book lol. My problem now is that I haven't ever met a girl that I really really want to pursue something with and I don't want to misplay this

#10 Edited by UrbanChill (229 posts) - - Show Bio

Depends on how long youve known her and what you were talking about

if you really want to see if shes busy or not and not just responding send her a text about a semi important question that you know she would have to respond to

#11 Edited by buttersdaman000 (9947 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

@buttersdaman000:

I appreciate the advice but "game" is why my uncle taught me since I was 9 years old. And for better or worse it's worked wonders for me before. He used to say "we're all in the game whether we like it or not. The ones who say they aren't playing are either the best players or the ones getting played the worst." Basically it's like a family thing. We "pass the game down" generations. Part of my "game" is I have text rules, interpersonal rules etc. I legit could write a book lol. My problem now is that I haven't ever met a girl that I really really want to pursue something with and I don't want to misplay this

Fair enough, but theres a difference between 'game' and 'playing games' which is what I was trying to get at. To me, having texting rules as constricting as that falls into 'playing games'. But if its worked for you, I salute you lol

#12 Posted by Icarusflies (12504 posts) - - Show Bio

She might have just been busy and stopped texting. You can text her again, but DO NOT pester her. Text her with a conversation topic, NOT 'hey why did you not reply'. If she still doesn't reply, leave her alone.

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#13 Posted by SOG7dc (7483 posts) - - Show Bio

@buttersdaman000:

These are my texting rules. They really work in my experience:

1. Never send two in a row. My time and attention is valuable. If he doesn't feel they are important enough to respond to, then I move on.

2. 4:1 ratio. {x|x=emoji or x=any variation of "lol"}. For every 4 lol' sir smileys she sends me. I will maybe send 1 back.

3. Text sizes must match or mine must be smaller than hers. I want her to hang on every word. The real conversation happens face to face.

4. Never text without purpose unless already in a relationship. Only text for a reason. To set something up or to ask an important question.

5. Relax. Don't text back immidiatley. The goal is to get time with her in person. Not have the first date via text.

#14 Posted by Teerack (7055 posts) - - Show Bio

girls can tell when you over think this stuff. try not caring and going on your date :P

#15 Posted by SOG7dc (7483 posts) - - Show Bio
#16 Posted by ARMIV2 (8671 posts) - - Show Bio

Just relax. Keep cool and breath slow. Rest on it until the morning and then some. Give her time to respond. If you're scheduled for a date with her tomorrow, then I wouldn't worry about this right here.

#17 Edited by Transformers1024 (2333 posts) - - Show Bio

I'm having the same trouble. Kinda. Although it's an ex. I don't know...women can be nuts...

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#18 Posted by ARMIV2 (8671 posts) - - Show Bio

I'm having the same trouble. Kinda. Although it's an ex. I don't know...women can be nuts...

I think I might be in that same boat...

#19 Posted by Transformers1024 (2333 posts) - - Show Bio

@armiv2: Lol what's your situation?

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#20 Edited by AllStarSuperman (22193 posts) - - Show Bio

There's probably some girly nail polish or One direction forum shes on right now asking a related question, lol

I voted chill

#21 Posted by Chibi_cute (4561 posts) - - Show Bio

Chill.. just let it flow..

#22 Posted by RustyRoy (13184 posts) - - Show Bio

Chill

#23 Posted by HillbillyMorangie (927 posts) - - Show Bio

Lave her be, if a woman's interested she will let you know, unless she's a cow in which case don't bother she probably prefers the attention to anything meaningful so even if you go out she will dump you for the next man that gives her some drama. Truth is most women are horrible, as a rule they want everything, perfect job, perfect kids, perfect man, perfect bit on the side, perfect house, perfect car... It's to difficult to please a woman and you will never get much in return... Best thing to do is try and meet a nice girl that doesn't play games, then even if you don't fancy her swallow your pride and date her and see if you click. If not let her down nicely you don't want to be like the women who use people to get what they want then cheating on them as soon as something better comes along.

It's easy to become bitter, so try to always think it through when dating or ending relationships, men can't cope with secret and skeletons in their closets or back staying or emotional games so best to try and avoid those things :)

Hope that helps... She's not worth it

#24 Posted by Avenger85 (1910 posts) - - Show Bio

Chill out man. She must be busy. You will be meeting her tomorrow anyways.

If you really cannot wait that long then jut text her something IMPORTANT you think she will want to answer ASAP.

#25 Posted by laflux (16777 posts) - - Show Bio

Chill out.

Also, your no two text in a row thing is stupid. Playing games, and adhering to rules like this only hinder your chances with her. As long as you aren't doing some crazy sh*t, don't fret over stuff like that.

#26 Posted by TifaLockhart (14079 posts) - - Show Bio
#27 Posted by Avenger85 (1910 posts) - - Show Bio
#28 Edited by Pyrogram (40811 posts) - - Show Bio
@tifalockhart said:

Think with your big head, not your other head.

Not a personal attack at you, but I've always thought this was ridiculous advice which makes no logical sense.

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#29 Edited by Deranged Midget (17712 posts) - - Show Bio

She might have just been busy and stopped texting. You can text her again, but DO NOT pester her. Text her with a conversation topic, NOT 'hey why did you not reply'. If she still doesn't reply, leave her alone.

Moderator
#30 Posted by Wolverine08 (43576 posts) - - Show Bio

@laflux said:

@buttersdaman000 said:

Chill out.

Also, your no two text in a row thing is stupid. Playing games, and adhering to rules like this only hinder your chances with her. As long as you aren't doing some crazy sh*t, don't fret over stuff like that.

#31 Posted by SOG7dc (7483 posts) - - Show Bio
#32 Edited by ARMIV2 (8671 posts) - - Show Bio

@armiv2: Lol what's your situation?

Skinny of it: Last "relationship" I was in wasn't one as she kept dreaming about other dudes. I break ties to sever that loss, and she later tells me that she felt for me and passive-aggressively gets at me by threatening to hurt herself.

#33 Posted by ImpurestCheese (5500 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc: Keep calm and call her the day after, You don't want to go in too early because when that happened to me I found it a bit creepy but too late and she'll think you're a jerk. Give it twelve hours or so and you should be fine.

@armiv2: Tell me about it. I came home from a twelve day week and found my partner sleeping with a guy in our bed. What's worse is that four months on they are now engaged and I'm eating lonely woman dinners for one

#34 Posted by ARMIV2 (8671 posts) - - Show Bio
#35 Edited by ImpurestCheese (5500 posts) - - Show Bio

@armiv2: Yep and to go over to the enemy, so much for her being a friend of Sapho

#36 Posted by Experio (16610 posts) - - Show Bio

Make her wait, let her come to you.

#37 Edited by shonen3 (476 posts) - - Show Bio

OP It sounds like she has a guy on the side and your basically her comfort blanket in case things don't go well. Also women have been known to lose interest in men if they show affection, or are too into them. If you text at her now, your showing that your emotionally dependant on her, and that she can take advantage of you. Don't go the beta male route OP. BE ALPHA.

#38 Posted by Vortex13 (12265 posts) - - Show Bio

You know this may seem a little crazy, but how about you call? I know! How insane is that?! Vocal communication!

#39 Edited by SOG7dc (7483 posts) - - Show Bio

yeah she's totally in to me and im not nearly as interested anymore..... :/ i hate it when girls make it easy

#40 Posted by RogueShadow (11095 posts) - - Show Bio

Buy a Colt.

Shoot her twice in the belly.

Problem solved.

#41 Posted by TotalBalance (742 posts) - - Show Bio
@sog7dc said:

yeah she's totally in to me and im not nearly as interested anymore..... :/ i hate it when girls make it easy

"Not like just a passing fancy but I really want to pursue a relationship with her"

What the heck happened to not a passing fancy?

#42 Posted by Cable_Extreme (9603 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc: Do this, just send her a text of what you are doing, something like, hey you should really come to the rock climbing center sometime, I found out that I am actually a fairly good climber. Something like that to start a conversation, but not sound desperate.

#43 Posted by Erik (33329 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc: Sleep with her best friend. Problem solved.

#44 Edited by sesquipedalophobe (4761 posts) - - Show Bio

#45 Posted by Yokergeist (12355 posts) - - Show Bio

Chill bro

#46 Posted by SOG7dc (7483 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

yeah she's totally in to me and im not nearly as interested anymore..... :/ i hate it when girls make it easy

"Not like just a passing fancy but I really want to pursue a relationship with her"

What the heck happened to not a passing fancy?

that as before she went all head over heels in like two days man

#47 Edited by Jayc1324 (12758 posts) - - Show Bio

There's usually a reason for her not texting back especially if the convo was going well. But since there's gonna be a date tomorrow there's no reason to freak out. You will see her tomorrow and just go from there. After your date you will look back on this and laugh at how silly you were being.

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#48 Edited by MrT800 (13 posts) - - Show Bio

I'd waite a couple days and see if she texts you back. If not call her. Hopefully u werent boring her or said anything weird... id waite....