Wanna get the views of you fine people on Marriage, relationships, do's and don'ts. Is marriage better than dating or vice versa and why
Marriage or Not??
Dating leads to marriage, if the couple is that dedicated to each other.
I don't really have an opinion on it. It just is what it is.
There is nothing wrong with marriage. Living together is what ruins relationships. you can't appreciate someone if they are always around. You have to much time to see them at their worst. If you want to be happy. marry them but don't live together. It's like you're dating forever.
Marriage is nice for very very committed couples. People are against marriage just to be against it.
I believe in Marriage because I believe in God and God says if a man sleeps with a Woman he shall marry her...
Marriage is great if you marry the right person, but it isn't easy. It requires patients and the ability to compromise also the ability to know how to pick your battles is extremely helpful, you may hate chick flicks but complaining about them only means that when you watch your Dr. Who marathon you will be locked in an endless spiral of questions about every aspect of the show all because you pointed out that all Nicholas Sparks movies have the exact same plot. This may be colored heavily from personal experience but my point remains.
@TERMINATORXX said:
I believe in Marriage because I believe in God and God says if a man sleeps with a Woman he shall marry her...
Ahh, yes, traditional values according to the Bible...
Like, for example, when you capture a woman, you can make her your slave and marry her:
Deuteronomy 21:11-14
"If you notice among the captives a beautiful woman and are attracted to her, you may take her as your wife.Bring her into your home and have her shave her head, trim her nailsand put aside the clothes she was wearing when captured. After she has lived in your house and mourned her father and mother for a full month, then you may go to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife."
Or, if you happen to rape a girl, then you have to pay her father some money and then marry her:
Deuteronomy 22:28-29
"If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered,he shall pay her father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives."
Isnt that nice? I know I get a warm feeling every time I read the good book.
@WillPayton said:
@TERMINATORXX said:
I believe in Marriage because I believe in God and God says if a man sleeps with a Woman he shall marry her...
Ahh, yes, traditional values according to the Bible...
Like, for example, when you capture a woman, you can make her your slave and marry her:
Deuteronomy 21:11-14
"If you notice among the captives a beautiful woman and are attracted to her, you may take her as your wife.Bring her into your home and have her shave her head, trim her nailsand put aside the clothes she was wearing when captured. After she has lived in your house and mourned her father and mother for a full month, then you may go to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife."
Or, if you happen to rape a girl, then you have to pay her father some money and then marry her:
Deuteronomy 22:28-29
"If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered,he shall pay her father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives."
Isnt that nice? I know I get a warm feeling every time I read the good book.
False... God says if a man sleeps with a Woman he shall marry her, he never used the word rape.... stop trying to rewrite the bible boy...
@TERMINATORXX said:
@WillPayton said:
@TERMINATORXX said:
I believe in Marriage because I believe in God and God says if a man sleeps with a Woman he shall marry her...
Ahh, yes, traditional values according to the Bible...
Like, for example, when you capture a woman, you can make her your slave and marry her:
Deuteronomy 21:11-14
"If you notice among the captives a beautiful woman and are attracted to her, you may take her as your wife.Bring her into your home and have her shave her head, trim her nailsand put aside the clothes she was wearing when captured. After she has lived in your house and mourned her father and mother for a full month, then you may go to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife."
Or, if you happen to rape a girl, then you have to pay her father some money and then marry her:
Deuteronomy 22:28-29
"If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered,he shall pay her father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives."
Isnt that nice? I know I get a warm feeling every time I read the good book.
False... God says if a man sleeps with a Woman he shall marry her, he never used the word rape.... stop trying to rewrite the bible boy...
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Deuteronomy+22%3A28-29&version=NIV
Deuteronomy 22:28-29
New International Version (NIV)
If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he shall pay her father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives.
Footnotes:
- Deuteronomy 22:29 That is, about 1 1/4 pounds or about 575 grams
I am neither for it nor against it, I have nothing against people wanting to get married, but I don't see how a piece of parchment and a few fancy words will make someone love their spouse any more or less.
Do we need to turn every off topic thread into a religious debate? We get it Atheists don't like religion, religious people don't like whatever thing their versions of god's word tells them not to like. There I've covered both sides of the argument now please shut the F**k up about your opinions on religion if not asked about them.
@WillPayton: Stop slinging mud at Christians. Your quoting the Old Testament, man. New Testament, new rules. This explains why you don't see Christians going to church to slit a calf's throat and burning the body on a pyre as a sacrifice while sprinkling its blood on the earth.
When I compare my married life to my single life I say married is way better, I always have someone around who I enjoy being around, I eat better, I feel better, I get to have sex at least twice a week (way better than when I was single), and I generally a happier person. Marriage isn't for everyone but for me it was the right way to go.
If people feel marriage represents commitment and is the highest level of a relationship, then more power to them. Just the ceremony itself can help make that transition, a public declaration to their social and family circles bearing witness to it. Much like engagement and wedding rings on their fingers is a tactile reminder of that promise.
Others do not feel they require a ceremony or leaflet to mark their commitment to each other. They are comfortable and secure in their choice to remain together however, there are legalities that would make it favourable (government benefits, property and children.)
Furthermore, some people do not believe physical or emotional faithfulness are possible or even desirable and choose to not be involved in any form of committed relationship.
So, dating is great, finding someone you want to spend the rest of your life with is great, but as for marriage being better/not better - the answers are to be had with each person/couple. Personally, I don't believe marriage is required to be with someone for the rest of my life.
I probably won't marry. It would take a real gem for me to do commit myself 100% like that for the rest of my life. I take marriage seriously unlike most people.
@WillPayton said:
@TERMINATORXX said:
I believe in Marriage because I believe in God and God says if a man sleeps with a Woman he shall marry her...
Ahh, yes, traditional values according to the Bible...
Like, for example, when you capture a woman, you can make her your slave and marry her:
Deuteronomy 21:11-14
"If you notice among the captives a beautiful woman and are attracted to her, you may take her as your wife.Bring her into your home and have her shave her head, trim her nailsand put aside the clothes she was wearing when captured. After she has lived in your house and mourned her father and mother for a full month, then you may go to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife."
Or, if you happen to rape a girl, then you have to pay her father some money and then marry her:
Deuteronomy 22:28-29
"If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered,he shall pay her father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives."
Isnt that nice? I know I get a warm feeling every time I read the good book.
These laws were made for a specific people at a specific time for a specific reason. These laws were made null and void with the death of Jesus.
I dont see marriage as something that has to be done. I can be perfectly happy just living our lives together without something 'official' to bind us. But it's something two people should decide, not just one. If it would be important to her i'd drop to my knee and ask her to marry me in the most romantic fashion i can think of. If she doesnt think it's important it wouldnt matter because i'd still show my love for her every single day of my life. :)
@WillPayton said:
@TERMINATORXX said:
I believe in Marriage because I believe in God and God says if a man sleeps with a Woman he shall marry her...
Ahh, yes, traditional values according to the Bible...
Like, for example, when you capture a woman, you can make her your slave and marry her:
Deuteronomy 21:11-14
"If you notice among the captives a beautiful woman and are attracted to her, you may take her as your wife.Bring her into your home and have her shave her head, trim her nailsand put aside the clothes she was wearing when captured. After she has lived in your house and mourned her father and mother for a full month, then you may go to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife."
Or, if you happen to rape a girl, then you have to pay her father some money and then marry her:
Deuteronomy 22:28-29
"If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered,he shall pay her father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives."
Isnt that nice? I know I get a warm feeling every time I read the good book.
@Shotgun said:
@WillPayton: Stop slinging mud at Christians. Your quoting the Old Testament, man. New Testament, new rules. This explains why you don't see Christians going to church to slit a calf's throat and burning the body on a pyre as a sacrifice while sprinkling its blood on the earth.
@TERMINATORXX said:
@WillPayton said:
@TERMINATORXX said:
I believe in Marriage because I believe in God and God says if a man sleeps with a Woman he shall marry her...
Ahh, yes, traditional values according to the Bible...
Like, for example, when you capture a woman, you can make her your slave and marry her:
Deuteronomy 21:11-14
"If you notice among the captives a beautiful woman and are attracted to her, you may take her as your wife.Bring her into your home and have her shave her head, trim her nailsand put aside the clothes she was wearing when captured. After she has lived in your house and mourned her father and mother for a full month, then you may go to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife."
Or, if you happen to rape a girl, then you have to pay her father some money and then marry her:
Deuteronomy 22:28-29
"If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered,he shall pay her father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives."
Isnt that nice? I know I get a warm feeling every time I read the good book.
False... God says if a man sleeps with a Woman he shall marry her, he never used the word rape.... stop trying to rewrite the bible boy...
Also, i looked up those scriptures in my 2 bibles. These bibles have the original words on one side and the english translation on the other. Where you are saying "rape" i'm reading "make her ashamed" and "violate her". Even if sex was consensual between the two, if they were found out, that is considered "violating her" because she is no longer pure. The same with "make her ashamed". That would shame her family and name. She wouldn't be able to get married so the man had to take care of her by making her his wife. But since this was only written for a specific people for a specific reason, i don't see it's relevance in this discussion
@lykopis said:
If people feel marriage represents commitment and is the highest level of a relationship, then more power to them. Just the ceremony itself can help make that transition, a public declaration to their social and family circles bearing witness to it. Much like engagement and wedding rings on their fingers is a tactile reminder of that promise.
Others do not feel they require a ceremony or leaflet to mark their commitment to each other. They are comfortable and secure in their choice to remain together however, there are legalities that would make it favourable (government benefits, property and children.)
Furthermore, some people do not believe physical or emotional faithfulness are possible or even desirable and choose to not be involved in any form of committed relationship.
So, dating is great, finding someone you want to spend the rest of your life with is great, but as for marriage being better/not better - the answers are to be had with each person/couple. Personally, I don't believe marriage is required to be with someone for the rest of my life.
Pretty much this.
When I was a bit younger (relatively speaking) I had no interest in marriage. Now I actually look forward to it. Could just be the people in my peer group jump the broom left and right of course. I mean none of us live in a social/psychological bubble.
I didn't want to get married years ago, but things done changed. There has only been one girl I've ever felt this way about, and we've known each other since we were kids. It was difficult over the years, but I think she's the one.
There wouldn't be any other person I would be willing to split half of my stuff with (unless prenup ... lol). I used to be worried about being a shell of my former self after marriage; some of the marriage, and especially the divorce laws, are egregious.
I didn't want to get married years ago, but things done changed. There has only been one girl I've ever felt this way about, and we've known each other since we were kids. It was difficult over the years, but I think she's the one. There wouldn't be any other person I would be willing to split half of my stuff with (unless prenup ... lol). I used to be worried about being a shell of my former self after marriage; some of the marriage, and especially the divorce laws, are egregious.So why not make that move dude? whats holding you back?.
@Sexy Merc said:Just waiting for the right time ;)I didn't want to get married years ago, but things done changed. There has only been one girl I've ever felt this way about, and we've known each other since we were kids. It was difficult over the years, but I think she's the one. There wouldn't be any other person I would be willing to split half of my stuff with (unless prenup ... lol). I used to be worried about being a shell of my former self after marriage; some of the marriage, and especially the divorce laws, are egregious.So why not make that move dude? whats holding you back?.
@IZZR said:lol Take it from me dude, there is no such thing...you only get one shot...if you keep waiting that chance might disappear.@Sexy Merc said:Just waiting for the right time ;)I didn't want to get married years ago, but things done changed. There has only been one girl I've ever felt this way about, and we've known each other since we were kids. It was difficult over the years, but I think she's the one. There wouldn't be any other person I would be willing to split half of my stuff with (unless prenup ... lol). I used to be worried about being a shell of my former self after marriage; some of the marriage, and especially the divorce laws, are egregious.So why not make that move dude? whats holding you back?.
@Shotgun said:
@WillPayton: Stop slinging mud at Christians. Your quoting the Old Testament, man. New Testament, new rules. This explains why you don't see Christians going to church to slit a calf's throat and burning the body on a pyre as a sacrifice while sprinkling its blood on the earth.
I think i would go to church more just to see that o.o lmaoooo
@Sexy Merc said:Trust me, the time is coming, and with all we've been through, I know we wouldn't want anyone else. We've talked about it quite a bit recently (we're both 22), but we're living well now, and want to do some more things before marriage (and before the law, banks, taxes, and all that other sh~t start sneaking their little heads in).@IZZR said:lol Take it from me dude, there is no such thing...you only get one shot...if you keep waiting that chance might disappear.@Sexy Merc said:Just waiting for the right time ;)I didn't want to get married years ago, but things done changed. There has only been one girl I've ever felt this way about, and we've known each other since we were kids. It was difficult over the years, but I think she's the one. There wouldn't be any other person I would be willing to split half of my stuff with (unless prenup ... lol). I used to be worried about being a shell of my former self after marriage; some of the marriage, and especially the divorce laws, are egregious.So why not make that move dude? whats holding you back?.
I like the idea of marriage, not a wedding, a marriage.
I think if you only want to be with that person and no one else then whats a piece of jewellery and a party?
People who seem scared of marriage seems to me that theyre scared their life may end and theyre looking at the wrong end of the stick
As well in my experience people who dont 'believe' in marriage have missed their chance cause they messed it up for themselves. Not saying that's so about everyone but the people I've met so far who dont 'believe' in it are like that.
@IZZR said:Sounds awsome, i guess the more things you go through together the closer it brings you both, im 22 aswell and ive been thinking about it alot too. But youre right make a solid plan together to get where you have to be (finacially) to marry each other without much worry.@Sexy Merc said:Trust me, the time is coming, and with all we've been through, I know we wouldn't want anyone else. We've talked about it quite a bit recently (we're both 22), but we're living well now, and want to do some more things before marriage (and before the law, banks, taxes, and all that other sh~t start sneaking their little heads in).@IZZR said:lol Take it from me dude, there is no such thing...you only get one shot...if you keep waiting that chance might disappear.@Sexy Merc said:Just waiting for the right time ;)I didn't want to get married years ago, but things done changed. There has only been one girl I've ever felt this way about, and we've known each other since we were kids. It was difficult over the years, but I think she's the one. There wouldn't be any other person I would be willing to split half of my stuff with (unless prenup ... lol). I used to be worried about being a shell of my former self after marriage; some of the marriage, and especially the divorce laws, are egregious.So why not make that move dude? whats holding you back?.
I have nothing against Marriage. If your committed enough to each other then sure go ahead. Definitely not something to rush into though.
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