I'll bite. I actually wanted to post a thread on race relations asking people how we should approach it because I think it bears discussion.
To take your questions one at a time:
1. No, I don't think there is ever a time to riot. If you're rights are being suppressed to the point that you need to resort to violence, you better have tried absolutely everything else already for a long, long time and you better have a military objective in mind because otherwise you are just being a dick. It wasn't riots that turned white America around on race in the 60's; it was peaceful protest and compassionate, reasoned arguments that won the hearts and minds of Americans.
2. Do I feel a need to be nicer when talking to a black person? Not really, but I do feel like I'm walking on egg shells at times, and I find that I often find myself wondering about whether what I'm saying or doing will be misinterpreted as racist. I feel like I've heard so many accusations of things being called racist that weren't racist that I feel paranoid that anything I say with a remotely racial connotation might be taken the wrong way, and many white people I've talked to feel the same way. (notice the people who wouldn't touch this conversation above)
I've often found myself wanting to speak from the heart on an issue involving race with black people, but thought...nah, I'm not going to go there because I have no idea how they'll react. For instance, a black lady I work with once said, "The only reason people don't like President Obama is that he's black," and I thought...that's not remotely true. I know plenty of people who hate these types of policies no matter the color of who approved them, but am I going to risk this blowing up in my face and getting accused of saying something racist? Nope.
I've noticed this goes both ways though. I've been around black coworkers as they've been talking amongst themselves while I'm on the other end of the room, and they'll be telling a story, and when they get to the point where they are going to talk the crazy thing some white guy did, they lower their voice, not knowing I can still here them, just because they don't want to take the chance of me being offended, and this is sad. It's sad that we have allowed ourselves to be divided this way, but it seems to me that most white people have been told to be super careful what they say because it might sound racist and most black people are constantly on the look out for any signs of racism because they've been told that so many white people are racist. It's a self fulfilling prophecy, but I'm not sure how to combat it. I don't think we can heal as long as we feel we have to guarded with one another though.
3. I don't feel any white guilt. I'm not responsible for anybody's actions but my own. The idea of hereditary responsibility is fundamentally insane and racist by definition. I'm against any attempts to condemn anybody for the mistakes of some in their race.
4. I don't know. I guess the answer is yes, I definitely think there are advantages to being white, but I'm not sure if white privilege is any greater than any other racial privilege. It might be, but I think for every white privilege there is a corresponding privilege on the other side. For instance, a minority person can always play the race card in any number of situations. A minority person can usually get away with saying more things of a racial nature than can a white guy. There are plenty of programs especially designed to life up people of color. It might still be better to be white in the end, but I don't buy that it's a huge leg up.
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