#1 Posted by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

Judas Noir's Detective Agency

I'm Judas Noir private eye. I solve mysteries and $#!%......... If you have a mystery, I'll solve that $#!%............

#2 Posted by TheCheeseStabber (7726 posts) - - Show Bio

*Stands in Doorway, Darkness hides face*

Judas, I wanna hire you

#3 Edited by thespideyguy (2645 posts) - - Show Bio

@judasnixon: Turn down the offer now. Make like Bullet Bob Hayes and run.

#4 Edited by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

*Stands in Doorway, Darkness hides face*

Judas, I wanna hire you

My price ain't cheap pal..... I't will cost you a diet coke and a pint of rum, and the diet coke paid up front. What is your story? What Mystery do you need me to solve? I'm The best god damn P. I. on Comic Vine......

#5 Posted by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

@judasnixon: Turn down the offer now. Make like Bullet Bob Hayes and run.

Judas Noir runs from no god damn case, or no god damn dame.......

#6 Posted by cattlebattle (12579 posts) - - Show Bio

Whatever happened to Robot Jones??

#7 Posted by TheCheeseStabber (7726 posts) - - Show Bio

@thecheesestabber said:

*Stands in Doorway, Darkness hides face*

Judas, I wanna hire you

My price ain't cheap pal..... I't will cost you a diet coke and a pint of rum, and the diet coke paid up front. What is your story? What Mystery do you need me to solve? I'm The best god damn P. I. on Comic Vine......

I didn't come to you because you were cheap

*Steps out of the dark*

I came to you because you're my son!

#8 Edited by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

Whatever happened to Robot Jones??

Robot Jones fell on hard times, and ended up as a condom vending machine in a strip club bathroom. Then he hooked up with a dame in a 4 Non Blondes cover band, called Fish Tits. Now he's the manger of the group. They're about to play a show some where in North Dakota.....

#9 Edited by cattlebattle (12579 posts) - - Show Bio

@cattlebattle said:

Whatever happened to Robot Jones??

Robot Jones fell on hard times, and ended up as a condom vending machine in a strip club bathroom. Then he hooked up with a dame in a 4 Non Blondes cover band, called Fish Tits. Now he's the manger of the group. They're about to play a show some where in North Dakota.....

Interesting....

#10 Posted by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

@judasnixon said:

@thecheesestabber said:

*Stands in Doorway, Darkness hides face*

Judas, I wanna hire you

My price ain't cheap pal..... I't will cost you a diet coke and a pint of rum, and the diet coke paid up front. What is your story? What Mystery do you need me to solve? I'm The best god damn P. I. on Comic Vine......

I didn't come to you because you were cheap

*Steps out of the dark*

I came to you because you're my son!

You god damn son of a bitch! How dare you walk out of my life when I was a little boy, and have the nerve to walk right back in to my god damn detective agency!

#11 Posted by _Gaff_ (3188 posts) - - Show Bio

What do the different color of our usernames mean?

Online
#12 Posted by AllStarSuperman (19907 posts) - - Show Bio

@_gaff_ said:

What do the different color of our usernames mean?

Good, Evil, Neutral

#13 Posted by _Gaff_ (3188 posts) - - Show Bio

@_gaff_ said:

What do the different color of our usernames mean?

Good, Evil, Neutral

ohhh, that's been bugging be since I have been here. thanks

Online
#14 Posted by AllStarSuperman (19907 posts) - - Show Bio

@_gaff_ said:

@allstarsuperman said:

@_gaff_ said:

What do the different color of our usernames mean?

Good, Evil, Neutral

ohhh, that's been bugging be since I have been here. thanks

your welcome. looks like i am stealing judasnixon's job.

#15 Posted by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

@_gaff_ said:

What do the different color of our usernames mean?

Good, Evil, Neutral

Red means you have syphiles

Grey means you still live with your mom

Blue means you were that kid who farted in class

#16 Posted by _Gaff_ (3188 posts) - - Show Bio

@_gaff_ said:

@allstarsuperman said:

@_gaff_ said:

What do the different color of our usernames mean?

Good, Evil, Neutral

ohhh, that's been bugging be since I have been here. thanks

your welcome. looks like i am stealing judasnixon's job.

Shouldn't drink on the job.

Online
#17 Posted by cattlebattle (12579 posts) - - Show Bio

Where in the world is Carmen Santiago??

#18 Edited by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

@cattlebattle said:

Where in the world is Carmen Santiago??

She is hanging out with Banksy in the Gaza Strip playing dominoes for diamonds...... Planning to steal Donald Trump's taint.......

#19 Edited by Rouflex (14828 posts) - - Show Bio

Is this a Ask me thread camoufled?

#20 Posted by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

@rouflex said:

Is this a Ask me thread camoufled?

No give a mystery, and i'll solve it..... It has nothing to do with me as a person. I'm a god damn detective. Not another ask me thread.......

#21 Posted by DarkLordArgeist (587 posts) - - Show Bio

What came first, Chicken or Egg?

#22 Posted by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

What came first, Chicken or Egg?

Any dame can tell ya that the eggs came first..... How the hell did ya think we got Lionel Richie? Chickens ain't $#!%..... That how we got the phrase chicken $#!%.... 'nother mystery solved....

#23 Edited by DarkLordArgeist (587 posts) - - Show Bio

@judasnixon: Nice....

How about the mystery of Superheroes wearing their undies outside.

#24 Edited by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

@superrobotargeist said:

@judasnixon: Nice....

How about the mystery of Superheroes wearing their undies outside.

They stole that $#!% from my second cousin Clem Fandago the Muscle Man......... (Fact that is where superheroes got the outside undies thing from) Case Closed.

#25 Edited by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

Judas Noir's Detective Agency is brought to you by....

What the hell is lung cancer? It's the 1940's...........

#26 Posted by DarkLordArgeist (587 posts) - - Show Bio

@superrobotargeist said:

@judasnixon: Nice....

How about the mystery of Superheroes wearing their undies outside.

They stole that $#!% from my second cousin Clem Fandago the Muscle Man......... (Fact that is where superheroes got the outside undies thing from) Case Closed.

Source of Batman's PIS power.

#Jokergeist for mod

#27 Posted by lykopis (10756 posts) - - Show Bio

I have a case for you.

Caramilk bar. The caramel. How do they do it? More importantly, why do they do it?

I'll be down at Louie's, nursing my Golden Cadillac in the darkest part of the bar until you find me worth you time, handsome.

#28 Posted by consolemaster001 (4938 posts) - - Show Bio

@judasnixon: Coke and Pepsi. The same thing ? Or something else more sinister ?

#29 Posted by TheCheeseStabber (7726 posts) - - Show Bio

@thecheesestabber said:

@judasnixon said:

@thecheesestabber said:

*Stands in Doorway, Darkness hides face*

Judas, I wanna hire you

My price ain't cheap pal..... I't will cost you a diet coke and a pint of rum, and the diet coke paid up front. What is your story? What Mystery do you need me to solve? I'm The best god damn P. I. on Comic Vine......

I didn't come to you because you were cheap

*Steps out of the dark*

I came to you because you're my son!

You god damn son of a bitch! How dare you walk out of my life when I was a little boy, and have the nerve to walk right back in to my god damn detective agency!

Look I'll explain on the way, but your mothers in trouble.

*Lights Cigarette*

*Dteps back in door way*

So you coming or not?

#30 Posted by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

@lykopis said:

I have a case for you.

Caramilk bar. The caramel. How do they do it? More importantly, why do they do it?

I'll be down at Louie's, nursing my Golden Cadillac in the darkest part of the bar until you find me worth you time, handsome.

Listen here doll. Caramilk bars were invented by Leonardo Da Vinci while he was high on PCP..... It was his deepest, darkest secret, and when I say darkest I mean chocolate sweetheart..... After Leonardo Da Vinci invented the helicopter. He decided to apply his new found technology to fill a chocolate bar with caramel.... It was to be his greatest invention. There has never been a candy so sweet, that is in till you came into my office doll.... 'nother case closed.......

#31 Edited by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

@judasnixon said:

@thecheesestabber said:

@judasnixon said:

@thecheesestabber said:

*Stands in Doorway, Darkness hides face*

Judas, I wanna hire you

My price ain't cheap pal..... I't will cost you a diet coke and a pint of rum, and the diet coke paid up front. What is your story? What Mystery do you need me to solve? I'm The best god damn P. I. on Comic Vine......

I didn't come to you because you were cheap

*Steps out of the dark*

I came to you because you're my son!

You god damn son of a bitch! How dare you walk out of my life when I was a little boy, and have the nerve to walk right back in to my god damn detective agency!

Look I'll explain on the way, but your mothers in trouble.

*Lights Cigarette*

*Dteps back in door way*

So you coming or not?

What are you talking about? My mother has been dead for over seven years...... Where are you going at old man!

@judasnixon: Coke and Pepsi. The same thing ? Or something else more sinister ?

Coke Cola was never the same since they took the cocaine out of it....... Haven't been to a god damn soda shop since. Pepsi on the other hand is still made with poison from the blow fish....... I'm a Pepsi guy.

#32 Edited by TheCheeseStabber (7726 posts) - - Show Bio

@thecheesestabber said:

@judasnixon said:

@thecheesestabber said:

@judasnixon said:

@thecheesestabber said:

*Stands in Doorway, Darkness hides face*

Judas, I wanna hire you

My price ain't cheap pal..... I't will cost you a diet coke and a pint of rum, and the diet coke paid up front. What is your story? What Mystery do you need me to solve? I'm The best god damn P. I. on Comic Vine......

I didn't come to you because you were cheap

*Steps out of the dark*

I came to you because you're my son!

You god damn son of a bitch! How dare you walk out of my life when I was a little boy, and have the nerve to walk right back in to my god damn detective agency!

Look I'll explain on the way, but your mothers in trouble.

*Lights Cigarette*

*Dteps back in door way*

So you coming or not?

What are you talking about? My mother has been dead for over seven years...... Where are you going at old man!

She Ain't yah Puss Snapper, she faked her death because she knew she was getting closer to the truth.

Now they got her, so get a move on!

#33 Posted by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

@judasnixon said:

@thecheesestabber said:

@judasnixon said:

@thecheesestabber said:

@judasnixon said:

@thecheesestabber said:

*Stands in Doorway, Darkness hides face*

Judas, I wanna hire you

My price ain't cheap pal..... I't will cost you a diet coke and a pint of rum, and the diet coke paid up front. What is your story? What Mystery do you need me to solve? I'm The best god damn P. I. on Comic Vine......

I didn't come to you because you were cheap

*Steps out of the dark*

I came to you because you're my son!

You god damn son of a bitch! How dare you walk out of my life when I was a little boy, and have the nerve to walk right back in to my god damn detective agency!

Look I'll explain on the way, but your mothers in trouble.

*Lights Cigarette*

*Dteps back in door way*

So you coming or not?

What are you talking about? My mother has been dead for over seven years...... Where are you going at old man!

She Ain't yah Puss Snapper, she faked her death because she knew she was getting closer to the truth.

Now they got her, so get a move on!

How? How did she fake her death? I've seen her get killed by a Polar Bear at 1940's Sea World with my own two eyes...... If I ever meet that son bitch who gave that Polar Bear that Tommy Gun I'll kill him with my own two bare hands........ I hate Polar Bears.

#34 Posted by TheCheeseStabber (7726 posts) - - Show Bio

@thecheesestabber said:

@judasnixon said:

@thecheesestabber said:

@judasnixon said:

@thecheesestabber said:

@judasnixon said:

@thecheesestabber said:

*Stands in Doorway, Darkness hides face*

Judas, I wanna hire you

My price ain't cheap pal..... I't will cost you a diet coke and a pint of rum, and the diet coke paid up front. What is your story? What Mystery do you need me to solve? I'm The best god damn P. I. on Comic Vine......

I didn't come to you because you were cheap

*Steps out of the dark*

I came to you because you're my son!

You god damn son of a bitch! How dare you walk out of my life when I was a little boy, and have the nerve to walk right back in to my god damn detective agency!

Look I'll explain on the way, but your mothers in trouble.

*Lights Cigarette*

*Dteps back in door way*

So you coming or not?

What are you talking about? My mother has been dead for over seven years...... Where are you going at old man!

She Ain't yah Puss Snapper, she faked her death because she knew she was getting closer to the truth.

Now they got her, so get a move on!

How? How did she fake her death? I've seen her get killed by a Polar Bear at 1940's Sea World with my own two eyes...... If I ever meet that son bitch who gave that Polar Bear that Tommy Gun I'll kill him with my own two bare hands........ I hate Polar Bears.

I know who gave the Bear the Gun.

I have the skills to take them down but I need help.

It was Klondike....

*Walks over to window*

SH!T!

THEY KNOW I'M HERE

LETS GO!

#35 Posted by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

Where the hell are we going.........

#36 Edited by Khan_Noonien_Singh (514 posts) - - Show Bio

Is this a RPG thread?

#37 Posted by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

Is this a RPG thread?

Nope.... Just solving Mysteries.

Coming Soon.... Judas Noir in Who peed on top of my car?

#38 Posted by Khan_Noonien_Singh (514 posts) - - Show Bio
#39 Posted by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

@judasnixon: Can you help me find my car keys?

I'm on the case.......... I would check the last pair of pants you wore, and the couch.

#40 Posted by judasnixon (6172 posts) - - Show Bio

Judas Noir's Detective Agency is brought to you by....

Don Draper Wrote that $#!%............

#41 Edited by MandoViking (347 posts) - - Show Bio

Finally Tracer Bullet has some competent competition.

#42 Posted by lykopis (10756 posts) - - Show Bio

@lykopis said:

I have a case for you.

Caramilk bar. The caramel. How do they do it? More importantly, why do they do it?

I'll be down at Louie's, nursing my Golden Cadillac in the darkest part of the bar until you find me worth you time, handsome.

Listen here doll. Caramilk bars were invented by Leonardo Da Vinci while he was high on PCP..... It was his deepest, darkest secret, and when I say darkest I mean chocolate sweetheart..... After Leonardo Da Vinci invented the helicopter. He decided to apply his new found technology to fill a chocolate bar with caramel.... It was to be his greatest invention. There has never been a candy so sweet, that is in till you came into my office doll.... 'nother case closed.......

Thank you, Detective Noir. Your "payment" will waiting for you down at the Ritz.. Room 412.