#1 Posted by Blue Nighty (374 posts) - - Show Bio

got a funny joke tell us it..

#2 Posted by Blue Nighty (374 posts) - - Show Bio

fine i will start lol well a women is golfing and she gets stung by a bee and so she went back to get a aid kit. and the onwer ask her what happened, and she sayed she got stung. and then he says where and shes says between the first and second hole.. he says well maybe your stance was too wide.....lol

#3 Posted by Octagon Freak (11158 posts) - - Show Bio

Blue Nighty says:

"fine i will start lol well a women is golfing and she gets stung by a bee and so she went back to get a aid kit. and the onwer ask her what happened, and she sayed she got stung. and then he says where and shes says between the first and second hole.. he says well maybe your stance was too wide.....lol "

Muhahaha!!! I don't know many good ones, I'd have to look them up.

#4 Posted by Blue Nighty (374 posts) - - Show Bio

lol

#5 Posted by Blue Nighty (374 posts) - - Show Bio

any dumb blonde jokes... lol

#6 Posted by Octagon Freak (11158 posts) - - Show Bio

Blue Nighty says:

"any dumb blonde jokes... lol"

In fact, I do have one o' dem!

Three women escape from a women's penetentry. They hide in a near-by barn. The red head jumps in the first potatoe sack, the brunette jumps in the second, and the blonde jumps in the third. The sheriff walks in and kicks each bag to see what's inside. He kicked the first one, the red head yelled, "Meow!" The seriff said, "Just a damn cat." He kicked the brunette's bad, and she said, "Woof woof!" The sheriff said, "Oh, just a damn dog." He walked to the last one with the blonde in it, and kicked the sack. The blonde said, "Potatoes."

#7 Posted by girlygirl (80 posts) - - Show Bio

k my brother told me this one:P....

one day there was a poor little girl.her mom didn’t have any money to buy her underwear.one day the girl was wearing a little dress and playing up in a tree.a priest walked by and looked up,he called the little girl down and said "Little girl take this $100 and go buy you some new underwear and a pretty dress."

So the liittle girl took the money and ran home to tell her mom what happened.

the next day the mom was up in the tree without any underwear.

The priest walked by and called her down and said "Here’s $2 go and buy yourself some razors!"

#8 Posted by girlygirl (80 posts) - - Show Bio

Octagon Freak says:

"Blue Nighty says:
"any dumb blonde jokes... lol"

In fact, I do have one o' dem!

Three women escape from a women's penetentry. They hide in a near-by barn. The red head jumps in the first potatoe sack, the brunette jumps in the second, and the blonde jumps in the third. The sheriff walks in and kicks each bag to see what's inside. He kicked the first one, the red head yelled, "Meow!" The seriff said, "Just a damn cat." He kicked the brunette's bad, and she said, "Woof woof!" The sheriff said, "Oh, just a damn dog." He walked to the last one with the blonde in it, and kicked the sack. The blonde said, "Potatoes.""

lol heard that one before

#9 Posted by Donnieman v5.1 (44323 posts) - - Show Bio

Octagon Freak says:

"Blue Nighty says:
"any dumb blonde jokes... lol"

In fact, I do have one o' dem!

Three women escape from a women's penetentry. They hide in a near-by barn. The red head jumps in the first potatoe sack, the brunette jumps in the second, and the blonde jumps in the third. The sheriff walks in and kicks each bag to see what's inside. He kicked the first one, the red head yelled, "Meow!" The seriff said, "Just a damn cat." He kicked the brunette's bad, and she said, "Woof woof!" The sheriff said, "Oh, just a damn dog." He walked to the last one with the blonde in it, and kicked the sack. The blonde said, "Potatoes.""

lol heard this one before

#10 Posted by Octagon Freak (11158 posts) - - Show Bio

Woah, you guys both said the same thing!

#11 Posted by Donnieman v5.1 (44323 posts) - - Show Bio

I guy takes his girlfriend to his house. He tells his grandma they they are going in his room to make some sandwiches.

He tells her to say lettuce if she wants him to thrust harder and to say tomatoes if she wants him to thrust faster. So she's screaming lettuce, tomatoes, tomatoes, lettuce, and afterwards they leave the room.

On the way out the grandma sees them. The grandma says, little girl have you no shame? Wipe the mayonnaise off your mouth.

#12 Posted by girlygirl (80 posts) - - Show Bio

A blonde asked someone what time it was, and they told her it was 4:45. The blonde was confused.. she said "You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer."

If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building, who would hit the ground first?

The brunette - the blonde would have to stop for directions!

Yo mama so hairy you almost died of rugburn at birth!

Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

random ones i heard before.. oh and novaboy i wonder where this one came from: your mama so flat the walls are jealous.

#13 Posted by girlygirl (80 posts) - - Show Bio

Donnieman v5.1 says:

"I guy takes his girlfriend to his house. He tells his grandma they they are going in his room to make some sandwiches.He tells her to say lettuce if she wants him to thrust harder and to say tomatoes if she wants him to thrust faster. So she's screaming lettuce, tomatoes, tomatoes, lettuce, and afterwards they leave the room.On the way out the grandma sees them. The grandma says, little girl have you no shame? Wipe the mayonnaise off your mouth."

hahaha

#14 Posted by Valkaad (2589 posts) - - Show Bio

Blue Nighty says:

"any dumb blonde jokes... lol"

You know that all the Dumb blonde jokes where made up brunettes who had nothing else to do on Saturday night.

#15 Posted by Sparda (15795 posts) - - Show Bio

There's a blonde sitting in a boat, in a field of tall grass, rowing. She's not getting anywhere. Suddenly, an SUV pulls over beside her on the road. The window rolls down, and there's another blonde driving. She says to the first "Y'know, it's you dumb blondes that make the rest of us look bad. If I could swim, I'd go out there and kic your @$$!"

#16 Posted by X-54 Clone (24 posts) - - Show Bio

girlygirl says:

"k my brother told me this one:P.... one day there was a poor little girl.her mom didn’t have any money to buy her underwear.one day the girl was wearing a little dress and playing up in a tree.a priest walked by and looked up,he called the little girl down and said "Little girl take this $100 and go buy you some new underwear and a pretty dress." So the liittle girl took the money and ran home to tell her mom what happened. the next day the mom was up in the tree without any underwear. The priest walked by and called her down and said "Here’s $2 go and buy yourself some razors!""

LMAO

#17 Posted by Blue Nighty (374 posts) - - Show Bio

Donnieman v5.1 says:

"I guy takes his girlfriend to his house. He tells his grandma they they are going in his room to make some sandwiches. He tells her to say lettuce if she wants him to thrust harder and to say tomatoes if she wants him to thrust faster. So she's screaming lettuce, tomatoes, tomatoes, lettuce, and afterwards they leave the room. On the way out the grandma sees them. The grandma says, little girl have you no shame? Wipe the mayonnaise off your mouth."

good one lol

#18 Posted by Blue Nighty (374 posts) - - Show Bio

theres a guy out side, and he sees a blonde in her drive way eating a tootsie roll pop. so he walks up and says " so how many licks does it take to get to the centre of a tootsie roll pop". and the blonde says "beats me, it took my all day just to lick through the wrapper"... lol

#19 Posted by Mantid (4417 posts) - - Show Bio

iceman_15 says:

"ur so fat that everytime you turn around you get a welcome back party (will this be the cause it doesnt look like you've done it before) "

lolz

#20 Posted by Donnieman v5.1 (44323 posts) - - Show Bio

Okay. Condoms come on packs of 6, 8 and 12.

The Hispanic guy buys 6 packs cuz he gets laid on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday , and Saturday.

The Black guy buys 8 packs cuz he gets laid on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday , Saturday, and twice on Sunday.

The White guy buys 12 packs cuz he gets laid in January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, and December.

(No offense to white guys)

#21 Posted by Blue Nighty (374 posts) - - Show Bio

honestly im not offended by that but its not funny srry...
Post Edited:2007-08-18 00:39:02

#22 Posted by Blue Nighty (374 posts) - - Show Bio

man your mamma is so nasty... that when she eats a hamburger, its like watching jurassic park with surround soound...

#23 Posted by The WeatherMan (3214 posts) - - Show Bio

Alright, this one is nasty.

So there is a couple in the movie theater and the woman goes.

"Oh man, I got to pee really bad"

Guy responds.

"You're going to disturb all these people that are watching the movie if you try to walk out. Just squat down and pee, its dark and noisy anyways."

So the chick squats down and begins to do her thing in the dark. All of a sudden the guy starts getting horny cause his girlfriend is right there naked and you know... So he decided to reach down with his hand, but when he does, he feels something long and sort of hard. The guy says.

"Eww! You changed your sex on me?!"

"Nope, I changed my mind. I'm taking a sh*t."

1

#24 Posted by girlygirl (80 posts) - - Show Bio

The WeatherMan says:

"Alright, this one is nasty.So there is a couple in the movie theater and the woman goes."Oh man, I got to pee really bad"Guy responds."You're going to disturb all these people that are watching the movie if you try to walk out. Just squat down and pee, its dark and noisy anyways."So the chick squats down and begins to do her thing in the dark. All of a sudden the guy starts getting horny cause his girlfriend is right there naked and you know... So he decided to reach down with his hand, but when he does, he feels something long and sort of hard. The guy says."Eww! You changed your sex on me?!""Nope, I changed my mind. I'm taking a sh*t."1"

hahahaha good one.. and i agree with blue nighty, donnieman v5.1 ur joke wasnt funny.

#25 Posted by Donnieman v5.1 (44323 posts) - - Show Bio

girlygirl says:

"The WeatherMan says:
"Alright, this one is nasty.So there is a couple in the movie theater and the woman goes."Oh man, I got to pee really bad"Guy responds."You're going to disturb all these people that are watching the movie if you try to walk out. Just squat down and pee, its dark and noisy anyways."So the chick squats down and begins to do her thing in the dark. All of a sudden the guy starts getting horny cause his girlfriend is right there naked and you know... So he decided to reach down with his hand, but when he does, he feels something long and sort of hard. The guy says."Eww! You changed your sex on me?!""Nope, I changed my mind. I'm taking a sh*t."1"

hahahaha good one.. and i agree with blue nighty, donnieman v5.1 ur joke wasnt funny."

it's an acquired taste. it also sounds much better if you hear it in person

#26 Posted by Vengeance II (151 posts) - - Show Bio

The Aristocrats anyone?

#27 Posted by Constantine (16044 posts) - - Show Bio

a englishman, scottishman, irishman, rabi and priest walk into a pub and the barman says "what is this? some kind of joke."

#28 Posted by Blue Nighty (374 posts) - - Show Bio

The WeatherMan says:

"Alright, this one is nasty. So there is a couple in the movie theater and the woman goes. "Oh man, I got to pee really bad" Guy responds. "You're going to disturb all these people that are watching the movie if you try to walk out. Just squat down and pee, its dark and noisy anyways." So the chick squats down and begins to do her thing in the dark. All of a sudden the guy starts getting horny cause his girlfriend is right there naked and you know... So he decided to reach down with his hand, but when he does, he feels something long and sort of hard. The guy says. "Eww! You changed your sex on me?!" "Nope, I changed my mind. I'm taking a sh*t." 1"

thats funny

#29 Posted by Paragon (7293 posts) - - Show Bio

Actually, Changed my mind. I'm going to link to it. I warn you now, The Aristocrats it a terrible joke, in the way that the joke it's self sucks, and in the way that it's disgusting, but still a classic. Oh, and easily for mature ears only. That's your warning, hear it at your own risk.


Post" />http://youtube.com/watch?v=tw10xa_xtNg
Post
Edited:2007-08-27 21:20:30
Post Edited:2007-08-27 21:22:42

#30 Posted by Lantern Prime (13045 posts) - - Show Bio

That guy is funny!

#31 Posted by Roddy010 (4930 posts) - - Show Bio
 A Really Bad Day 
There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.

Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."

"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."

"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."
#32 Posted by Matezoide2 (15994 posts) - - Show Bio
@Roddy010: 
lol,nice
#33 Posted by ARMIV (4140 posts) - - Show Bio
@Constantine said:
"

a englishman, scottishman, irishman, rabi and priest walk into a pub and the barman says "what is this? some kind of joke."

"
That one was great!