Is Childhood Trama An Excuse For Being A Useless Adult?

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pooty

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#1  Edited By pooty

Sometimes I watch TV shows like "Intervention" or "Celebrity Rehab". No matter what your addiction is, there seems to be some re-occurring reasons for their addiction like: my father was not around, I was molested as a child, My Mom died when I was young, I was bullied. Many of those things happened when they were very young and impressionable. Now you're a grown adult who steals, lies, prostitutes to feed their addiction.

My question is: Are they using their past as an excuse or are these valid reasons for their behavior?

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agent9149

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#2  Edited By agent9149

Yes. No. Depends on the person.

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ComicKID777

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#3  Edited By ComicKID777

ive suffered a lot.wont got into it but i yea i think its an excuse, i just think there weak people an they will turn to drugs an crime for whatever reason they feel they need to cause mentally there weak.

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YoungJustice

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#4  Edited By YoungJustice

Not useless, but being depressed, jittery, etc. yes. These things affect you throughout life's, you can't just forget them, they stick with you. All you can do is repress it as much as possible.

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blackadamFTW

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#5  Edited By blackadamFTW

Yes. Depending on the severity it certainly does cause mental problems, which can really f**k up your life.

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dernman

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#6  Edited By dernman

It's not as simple as a yes or no answer.

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Blood1991

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#7  Edited By Blood1991

@Dernman said:

It's not as simple as a yes or no answer.

Agreed, whether or not this is true would fall on each individual case.

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sesquipedalophobe

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#8  Edited By sesquipedalophobe

@pooty: Why did you bother making this thread?

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utotheg38

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#9  Edited By utotheg38

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty: Why did you bother making this thread?

lol

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joshmightbe

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#10  Edited By joshmightbe

Childhood trauma does the opposite if you ask me, look back at pretty much every person in the world who has ever actually made an impact on the world and you'll see a remarkable amount of childhood suffering and disease while when you see those people who got everything they could ever want or need as children and grow up to be whiney hipsters who spend all day crying about how the world isn't fair to them.

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Bruxae

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#11  Edited By Bruxae

Ive had alot of shit happening to me as a kid and while I honestly think it might be the reason for certain aspects of my life I never allow myself to use it as an excuse, I prefer to believe that I can rise above it if I am strong, and if I ever fail thats my fault and something to be improved rather then something my dad did wrong.

As an example, my father was very abusive, rather then doing the same thing to my kids and say "This is how I was raised." ive decided to give them a better life then I had, because im smart enough to realise that its not neccesarily right because it happened to me, so yes.. In alot of cases this is merely an excuse, I believe trauma can make certain things harder but not impossible, and its not ever entirely because of the trauma, you have a choice.

Sorry if I dont make sense, im not native english speaking.

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TheThe

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#12  Edited By TheThe

You're the one naming it "excuse". How do you know it's an excuse and that those people are lying to themselves in order to hide their weaknesses ? Nobody is in their head, so you dont know how they deal with their issues, nore how did their problems change them. Even though, people are differently affected by the same experiences. Human psychological condition is not a thing you can reduce in one simple answer.You should read psychology books, that 's the domain treating efficiently the questions you're asking. You'll see, it's more complex than what you think. Stop judging people like that in many of your threads.

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pooty

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#13  Edited By pooty

@sesquipedalophobe: was watching "Rehab with Dr. Drew"

@TheThe: You're the one naming it "excuse

Many times it is an excuse. But i also said "reason" twice in the OP. Maybe you missed that.

Stop judging people like that in many of your threads

I won't stop. But in this case i'm not judging, i'm asking a question.

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sesquipedalophobe

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@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe: was watching "Rehab with Dr. Drew"

@TheThe: You're the one naming it "excuse

Many times it is an excuse. But i also said "reason" twice in the OP. Maybe you missed that.

Stop judging people like that in many of your threads

I won't stop. But in this case i'm not judging, i'm asking a question.

Now I know you're lying. No one watches Rehab. So I have a question for you and this is completely legitimate: are you a sassy housewife on the bus?

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pooty

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#15  Edited By pooty

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe: was watching "Rehab with Dr. Drew"

@TheThe: You're the one naming it "excuse

Many times it is an excuse. But i also said "reason" twice in the OP. Maybe you missed that.

Stop judging people like that in many of your threads

I won't stop. But in this case i'm not judging, i'm asking a question.

Now I know you're lying. No one watches Rehab.

I wish I was...... i wish i was. but i only watch this season because it's not celebrities. but "real" people are just as difficult.

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sesquipedalophobe

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@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe: was watching "Rehab with Dr. Drew"

@TheThe: You're the one naming it "excuse

Many times it is an excuse. But i also said "reason" twice in the OP. Maybe you missed that.

Stop judging people like that in many of your threads

I won't stop. But in this case i'm not judging, i'm asking a question.

Now I know you're lying. No one watches Rehab.

I wish I was...... i wish i was. but i only watch this season because it's not celebrities. but "real" people are just as difficult.

And what did you learn from that particular show?

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TheCannon

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#17  Edited By TheCannon

@Agent9149 said:

Yes. No. Depends on the person.

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Prince_RehteStroC

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Define "useless".

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pooty

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#19  Edited By pooty

@sesquipedalophobe: not sure at the moment. that is why i made the thread to get others opinion.

@Prince_RehteStroC said:

Define "useless".

Now you're a grown adult who steals, lies, prostitutes to feed their addiction. Don't take care of your kids. A burden on your family, tearing your family apart etc

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sesquipedalophobe

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@pooty: An open mind leads to sway. Why would you want people's opinions on the matter of psychology, anyway?

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HexThis

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#21  Edited By HexThis

Well, just because someone is an addict it doesn't mean they're useless.

Many capable and responsible people with real jobs become addicts. I've even known of Doctors who've become addicted to opiates and yet still are efficient and reliable when it comes to their work. Just because someone has a dependency, it doesn't mean they have no contribution. But, also, childhood trauma may not be an excuse for addiction but it is very often a reason. Many addicts develop their addiction because they are self-medicating, they have unresolved issues that they are unable to handle and rely on external things to numb them and distract them.

Addicts aren't just people on the street brawling, it's allllll kinds of people.

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joshmightbe

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#22  Edited By joshmightbe

@Prince_RehteStroC: The entire cast and production staff of the Jersey Shore

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Prince_RehteStroC

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@joshmightbe said:

@Prince_RehteStroC: The entire cast and production staff of the Jersey Shore

Haha, true. I can especially agree with that after seeing how badly "The Situation" failed on the Donald Trump Roast.

lol

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pooty

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#24  Edited By pooty

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty: An open mind leads to sway. Why would you want people's opinions on the matter of psychology, anyway?

I like people's opinion on Thor vs SS or Romney vs Obama or evolution vs creation. Different people have different experiences, point of views etc. I think you can learn something of value from most people

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sesquipedalophobe

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@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty: An open mind leads to sway. Why would you want people's opinions on the matter of psychology, anyway?

I like people's opinion on Thor vs SS or Romney vs Obama or evolution vs creation. Different people have different experiences, point of views etc. I think you can learn something of value from most people

Oh, so then maybe you should ask the crack addict on 9th.

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kuonphobos

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#26  Edited By kuonphobos

Regarding topic: It has worked so far.

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pooty

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#27  Edited By pooty

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty: An open mind leads to sway. Why would you want people's opinions on the matter of psychology, anyway?

I like people's opinion on Thor vs SS or Romney vs Obama or evolution vs creation. Different people have different experiences, point of views etc. I think you can learn something of value from most people

Oh, so then maybe you should ask the crack addict on 9th.

Don't feel like leaving the house. So I'm asking the people addicted to Comicvine

@Prince_RehteStroC said:

@joshmightbe said:

@Prince_RehteStroC: The entire cast and production staff of the Jersey Shore

Haha, true. I can especially agree with that after seeing how badly "The Situation" failed on the Donald Trump Roast.

lol

That was so sad. Even with people writing his material he still sounded stupid.

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Prince_RehteStroC

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@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty: An open mind leads to sway. Why would you want people's opinions on the matter of psychology, anyway?

I like people's opinion on Thor vs SS or Romney vs Obama or evolution vs creation. Different people have different experiences, point of views etc. I think you can learn something of value from most people

Oh, so then maybe you should ask the crack addict on 9th.

Don't feel like leaving the house. So I'm asking the people addicted to Comicvine

@Prince_RehteStroC said:

@joshmightbe said:

@Prince_RehteStroC: The entire cast and production staff of the Jersey Shore

Haha, true. I can especially agree with that after seeing how badly "The Situation" failed on the Donald Trump Roast.

lol

That was so sad. Even with people writing his material he still sounded stupid.

I didn't even feel bad for him. Sadly I met a lot of people in Newark, NJ that were just like that.

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sesquipedalophobe

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@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty: An open mind leads to sway. Why would you want people's opinions on the matter of psychology, anyway?

I like people's opinion on Thor vs SS or Romney vs Obama or evolution vs creation. Different people have different experiences, point of views etc. I think you can learn something of value from most people

Oh, so then maybe you should ask the crack addict on 9th.

Don't feel like leaving the house. So I'm asking the people addicted to Comicvine

But you're going on extreme addictions, whereas Comicvine you don't have to steal someone's television to get the next post in. How many of us do you think are qualified to answer your questions?

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pooty

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#30  Edited By pooty

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty: An open mind leads to sway. Why would you want people's opinions on the matter of psychology, anyway?

I like people's opinion on Thor vs SS or Romney vs Obama or evolution vs creation. Different people have different experiences, point of views etc. I think you can learn something of value from most people

Oh, so then maybe you should ask the crack addict on 9th.

Don't feel like leaving the house. So I'm asking the people addicted to Comicvine

But you're going on extreme addictions, whereas Comicvine you don't have to steal someone's television to get the next post in. How many of us do you think are qualified to answer your questions?

I think many people on here are qualified to answer the question. They may not be addicts themselves but may have been affected by it personally. In fact I have already read some very good answers

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sesquipedalophobe

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@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty: An open mind leads to sway. Why would you want people's opinions on the matter of psychology, anyway?

I like people's opinion on Thor vs SS or Romney vs Obama or evolution vs creation. Different people have different experiences, point of views etc. I think you can learn something of value from most people

Oh, so then maybe you should ask the crack addict on 9th.

Don't feel like leaving the house. So I'm asking the people addicted to Comicvine

But you're going on extreme addictions, whereas Comicvine you don't have to steal someone's television to get the next post in. How many of us do you think are qualified to answer your questions?

I think many people on here are qualified to answer the question. They may not be addicts themselves but may have been affected by it personally. In fact I have already read some very good answers

Just as Dr. Drew is qualified to have a television show.

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pooty

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#32  Edited By pooty

@sesquipedalophobe: People on this site are educated and experienced in other things besides comics. And before you judge Dr. Drew, you should look at his credentials.

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sesquipedalophobe

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@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe: People on this site are educated and experienced in other things besides comics. And before you judge Dr. Drew, you should look at his credentials.

And yet you didn't learn a thing from his show. How am I supposed to take your word for it?

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joshmightbe

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#34  Edited By joshmightbe

Honestly the most useless people I've ever met grew up spoiled as hell with their parents constantly telling them how special they are. That left them totally unprepared for how the world actually works.

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sesquipedalophobe

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@joshmightbe: Yes, anyone I've met who was sheltered from the bad examples tended to be completely ignorant and it left them as pretty little targets.

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pooty

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#36  Edited By pooty

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe: People on this site are educated and experienced in other things besides comics. And before you judge Dr. Drew, you should look at his credentials.

And yet you didn't learn a thing from his show. How am I supposed to take your word for it?

You need to read things twice and slowly before you post a response

1) I didn't say I didn't learn anything from it. I said "not sure" because i'm still digesting it.

2) I didn't say take my word for it, I said " look at his credentials".

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TheThe

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#37  Edited By TheThe

@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe: was watching "Rehab with Dr. Drew"

@TheThe: You're the one naming it "excuse

Many times it is an excuse. But i also said "reason" twice in the OP. Maybe you missed that.

Stop judging people like that in many of your threads

I won't stop. But in this case i'm not judging, i'm asking a question.

You didnt answer my question. How do you know it's an excuse ? Is your statement true by the sole power of you saying it? The word "reason" was used to describe the situation from their point of view, but if you were not doubting of those reasons, you would not have named it "excuse". Also, naming them "useless" adults in the title of the thread gave indirectly your position (in a derogatory manner, may i add). Again, it's judgemental and rude(yes, "useless" is rude)with no proof in support of your claims.

If you think it's a good thing in life to judge people without knowing all the facts about them and not knowing what researchs and specialists have to say about childhood traumas, then good luck with that. Would you find it fair if somebody was saying things like that about you without analyzing all the facts nore having sufficient informations ? I dont think so.

Isnt the christian you are supposed to try not to do things to others he would not like them to do to him ? Not only are you doing the opposite, but you dont seem to realize that this thread is also a kind of invitation to people who share your position to join you in this bandwagon of judgemental behavior with - i repeat - no proof at all.

But Whatever ;)

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sesquipedalophobe

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@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe said:

@pooty said:

@sesquipedalophobe: People on this site are educated and experienced in other things besides comics. And before you judge Dr. Drew, you should look at his credentials.

And yet you didn't learn a thing from his show. How am I supposed to take your word for it?

You need to read things twice and slowly before you post a response

1) I didn't say I didn't learn anything from it. I said "not sure" because i'm still digesting it.

2) I didn't say take my word for it, I said " look at his credentials".

Okay, I'll break it down for you. You saw a television show that sparked your interest. That's fine--that's great, even. You thought everyone else might hold the same interest, although the title alone and the words of the op probably left a few thinking, "This is not how it works." Then, you proceed to bring up credentials of a reality television star as if it means anything at all. I told you to ask someone with an actual addiction and you simply said, "I don't feel like leaving the house." I don't know much about agoraphobia, but maybe something might spark my interest to create a thread about it unless someone beats me to the useless punch.

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joshmightbe

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#39  Edited By joshmightbe

@sesquipedalophobe: When I was about 10 my Grandpa told me the most honest thing any adult had said to me up to that point. He looked me in the eye and said I was special to my family but to the rest of the world I was just another face in the crowd unless I figured out a way to stand out. He said it a bit nicer than that but that was basically his point.

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sesquipedalophobe

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@joshmightbe: I wish I had family members like that. I just grew up like any other kid in a poor community: surrounded by drugs, excessive alcohol, abuse and all that. I turned out perfectly all right. Probably the only person who inspired me was in fact a Lil Loco fifteen years older than me, who was otherwise "useless," but he was realistic in his approach to living in a society that deemed certain people unfit to survive in a larger world. This is why I ask questions to clear-cut examples of the "wrong elements."

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pooty

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#41  Edited By pooty

@TheThe: Read my statements SLOWLY. You are totally wrong on everything you said.

You didnt answer my question. How do you know it's an excuse. The word "reason" was used to describe the situation from their point of vie

This is what I said " My question is: Are they using their past as an excuse or are these valid reasons for their behavior? That was a question from my point of view. I'm exploring both sides

"useless" adults in the title of the thread gave indirectly your position

they may be useless for a valid reason. or they may be using childhood trauma as an excuse. I gave no position.

it's judgemental and rude(yes, "useless" is rude)with no proof in support of your claims.

they don't support their kids, don't work, steal and sell their bodies. that is all the proof i need

If you think it's a good thing in life to judge people without knowing all the facts about them and not knowing what researchs and specialists have to say about childhood traumas

My judgement is just my opinion. it can be changed and my "judgement" is not hurting any of them

Isnt the christian you are supposed to try not to do things to others he would not like them to do to him

People have and will continue to judge me. I couldn't care less. very few people judgements concern me

but you dont seem to realize that this thread is also a kind of invitation to people who share your position to join you in this bandwagon of judgemental behavior with - i repeat - no proof at all.

I actually enjoy when people DISAGREE with me. it makes for better debates. and again I have proof enough for me.

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pooty

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#42  Edited By pooty

@sesquipedalophobe: You thought everyone else might hold the same interest, although the title alone and the words of the op probably left a few thinking, "This is not how it works

I gave both view points in the OP. You only focused on one side

you proceed to bring up credentials of a reality television star as if it means anything at all

you erroneously call him a "tv star". He has degrees from Southern California, his own practice and is a professor at a University in California. Do some research before you call him a "tv star".

I told you to ask someone with an actual addiction

Been there. Done that.

I don't know much about agoraphobia

It's the weather i'm avoiding

But thanks for bumping my thread quite a few times. without you, it wouldn't be on the first page anymore.

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sesquipedalophobe

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@pooty: He is a television star. I'm sorry you had to find out this way.

It was pretty clear you formed an opinion on the matter before you started the thread, which is evident throughout all of your threads. Been there, done that? Then no one can help you here. It's really a case by case basis, which everyone else has stated. Notice none of those people will start a thread and then claim ignorance the twenty-third post in. But that's your game, isn't it?

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TheThe

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#44  Edited By TheThe

@pooty said:

@TheThe: Read my statements SLOWLY. You are totally wrong on everything you said.

You didnt answer my question. How do you know it's an excuse. The word "reason" was used to describe the situation from their point of vie

This is what I said " My question is: Are they using their past as an excuse or are these valid reasons for their behavior? That was a question from my point of view. I'm exploring both sides

"useless" adults in the title of the thread gave indirectly your position

they may be useless for a valid reason. or they may be using childhood trauma as an excuse. I gave no position.

it's judgemental and rude(yes, "useless" is rude)with no proof in support of your claims.

they don't support their kids, don't work, steal and sell their bodies. that is all the proof i need

If you think it's a good thing in life to judge people without knowing all the facts about them and not knowing what researchs and specialists have to say about childhood traumas

My judgement is just my opinion. it can be changed and my "judgement" is not hurting any of them

Isnt the christian you are supposed to try not to do things to others he would not like them to do to him

People have and will continue to judge me. I couldn't care less. very few people judgements concern me

but you dont seem to realize that this thread is also a kind of invitation to people who share your position to join you in this bandwagon of judgemental behavior with - i repeat - no proof at all.

I actually enjoy when people DISAGREE with me. it makes for better debates. and again I have proof enough for me.

Oh my. Actually you're the one who needs to read others carefully. You're quoting semi-phrases and sentences out of context, and i'm not even sure you properly understand what we are saying. You sir have to replace the Reality tv shows you watch by psychology documentaries. Unstead of asking viners their opinions about it, maybe you should have googled scientific articles before. But whatever, you've got your personal methods...

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pooty

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#45  Edited By pooty

@sesquipedalophobe:

But that's your game, isn't it?

If it is, then thanks for playing

@TheThe: Thanks for the bumps.

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ShadowsofBirds

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#46  Edited By ShadowsofBirds

It doesn't matter - knowing weather or not to place blame doesn't fix the problem.

o.O

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SC

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#47  Edited By SC  Moderator

Is Childhood Trauma An Excuse For Being A Useless Adult? Is Childhood Trauma An Explanation For Being A Useless Adult? Can Childhood Trauma Be An Excuse For Being A Useless Adult? Can Childhood Trauma Be An Excuse For Being A Useless Adult? 
 
Using the definition of useless given, there are actually lots of factors involved to create a person that could be labeled with that particular definition of useless, factors that are legitimate and easy to understand, convey, attribute and factors that are legitimate, but harder to understand and convey, and illegitimate reasons that also fall under the hard to understand and easy to understand. Childhood trauma is a relatively easy and perceptively simple to understand reason to explain/excuse adult behavior but the thing is, with addicts, citing childhood trauma tends to be more about justifying behavior, excusing actions to deflect from responsibility and accountability, and its not the only factor that could be legitimate, likewise it isn't always a good excuse or reason to justify or explain behavior. A large general problem that people tend to have generally is to forget that bad things happen to other people. Empathy can play a factor here. The ability to not just realize that the people you see elsewhere can have better experiences (things like TV) often show that a lot of people can have better experiences because they are born wealthy or rich or powerful or looking a certain way) but the ability to imagine those that have it worse. I experienced childhood trauma but I believe it helped make me a better critical thinker and a more empathetic person. I never forget that many many others have an will suffer far far more than I did. TV can show bad things/experiences to people as well, but the way people's perceptions have adapted is to generally want more rather than be happy with less.               

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Inverno

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#48  Edited By Inverno

Yes it does if left untreated or neglected.

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deactivated-5d921c81bd12c

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Yes.

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longbowhunter

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#50  Edited By longbowhunter

I agree with a lot of people here, it depends on the person. But as someone who comes from a background like that nothing makes me angrier than people who use it as an excuse. I used it as a motivation, I refused to be a statistic.