What If Michael Bay made the Avengers?

Okay, I am feeling a little evil right now and I'd like to ask you guys: what would happen if Michael Bay that directed the Avengers not Joss Whedon, how it would be like and how you guys would react to it.

Lets see what he did to Shawshank Redemption:

"Vrrooom: Pew-Pew-BOOM-Pew-boobs-BOOM-BANGBANGBANG-boobs-Zooooom"

The end.

The final thirty minutes of the movie probably would not that much different to be honest

@Deranged Midget said:

LOL dude.

id gouge my eyes out then swim in a vat of hydrochloric acid and lye. i understand you were trying to be evil, but that aint funny. not in the least bit

@CaioTrubat: Everyone's thoughts mirror mine, let's be honest.

It would blow , and probably have his boy Shia in it.

@umbrafeline said:

id gouge my eyes out then swim in a vat of hydrochloric acid and lye. i understand you were trying to be evil, but that aint funny. not in the least bit

Yeah I know he would replace really funny bits like:

Cap: Big man in iron suit. Take that away and what are you?

Tony: Uh, genius. Billionaire. Playboy. Philanthropist.

With splapstick like that :-P

@CaioTrubat said:

@umbrafeline said:

id gouge my eyes out then swim in a vat of hydrochloric acid and lye. i understand you were trying to be evil, but that aint funny. not in the least bit

Yeah I know he would replace really funny bits like:

Cap: Big man in iron suit. Take that away and what are you?

Tony: Uh, genius. Billionaire. Playboy. Philanthropist.

With splapstick like that :-P

meh

I am Thor god of thunder and EXPLOSIONS!!!!!!!!!

Tony: Ive made a new version of my suit that makes everything around me explode in a really awesome way

Cap - Dammit, My old date is probably dead or really old, need to get a new one, preferably, slutty has hell

*add huge meaningless monologue from Banner talking to his Hulk side, with Hulk only responding with weird noises and grunts*

also, Linkin Park music as background and everyone turns out to be an alien, except Thor, who is already kind of an alien, so he turn out be a human, therefore an alien to the Asgardians

THE EXPLOVENGERS!

We'd see more soldiers than Avengers.

It would be about a random smart mouthed shield agent who becomes best friends with the Avengers... And we'd only see The Avengers for the fight scenes.

Well, we would see Thor's parents constantly dragging him down, getting high off of hash-brownies, and holding his baby booties for everyone to see. The Hulk would make lots and lots of subtle sex jokes, and some random redhead from a Victoria Secret Catalog would be playing Black Widow. 
 
Oh, and Martin Lawrence would be playing Nick Fury.

It would suck. I hate Bay's fast-cutting style. I want to see the Avengers in action, not see split second blurs.

... me and you sir would make one hell of a partnership on this website.

But surpassing the amount of explosives Bay would use for the Avengers BOOOOOOOM,... you'll bet Thanos would be in it BOOOOOOM BOOOOM BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM.

... sorry,.. suffering from Michaelbayphrenia,.... but if Michael Bay was to direct the Avengers we would probably see alot military,...BOOOOM!!!!...and model who can't act, BOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!.

...oh and Hawkeye's arrows would be exploding, BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM

@MTHarman: but Hawkeye's arrows DID explode in the Avengers...

@Jorgevy said:

@MTHarman: but Hawkeye's arrows DID explode in the Avengers...

Did it look like an arrow laced with 24 pounds of C-4? Because that barely reaches Michael Bays level for needless explosions.

Dude, I will never forgive you for the mental image you just put in my head

michael bay needs to be stopped from making movies

The final thirty minutes of the movie probably would not that much different to be honest

@FadeToBlackBolt said:

@cattlebattle said:

The final thirty minutes of the movie probably would not that much different to be honest

This =P

I agree!

didnt the movie have enough explosions?

@cattlebattle said:

The final thirty minutes of the movie probably would not that much different to be honest

The final thirthy minutes consist of the whole movie

@cattlebattle said:

The final thirty minutes of the movie probably would not that much different to be honest

The final thirthy minutes consist of the whole movie

jar jar binks with an eye-patch, megan fox in a catsuit and every other step the other avengers take BOOM! EXPLOSIONS EVERYWHERE!!

@Deranged Midget said:

Probably wouldnt be as good as previous avenger movie.... It would be a bad idea.

It would suck

You know I find it so funny that fans complain about Shia and Michael Bay. I'm a huge Transformers fan, I own the G1 series on DVD, I read the comic books(multiple ones), I play the games(which are canon), a watch whatever Transformer related comes out. I probably know as much about Transformers as JediXman does about Star Wars, and yet, I seem to be the only one not b!tch!ng about Bay's movies. Was there a lot of depth, not really, not in the second and third. Did the movie have other flaws, certainly. But just like the Avengers, take the movie for what it was, a popcorn action flick, and it was a fun one at that. At the very least you have to like the first one, it was awesome. The second was lacking, but the fights were still cool. And the third was an improvement over the second. They also got most of the characters right(like their personalities), not all, but a lot. The fights scenes were very cool to watch, very well done. And yes, I'm going to say it, Shia Lebeouf was perfectly fine in it, I thought he had some funny parts. Now, would the Avengers have been as good as it is now, probably not. Because Whedon is pretty good at displaying a characters motives, personality, and other social and emotional cues in a short amount of time(look at how much depth he put into Firefly, when it got canceled way too early), but the fights scenes would still have been fun.

@Uno_Oscuro said:

You know I find it so funny that fans complain about Shia and Michael Bay. I'm a huge Transformers fan, I own the G1 series on DVD, I read the comic books(multiple ones), I play the games(which are canon), a watch whatever Transformer related comes out. I probably know as much about Transformers as JediXman does about Star Wars, and yet, I seem to be the only one not b!tch!ng about Bay's movies. Was there a lot of depth, not really, not in the second and third. Did the movie have other flaws, certainly. But just like the Avengers, take the movie for what it was, a popcorn action flick, and it was a fun one at that. At the very least you have to like the first one, it was awesome. The second was lacking, but the fights were still cool. And the third was an improvement over the second. They also got most of the characters right(like their personalities), not all, but a lot. The fights scenes were very cool to watch, very well done. And yes, I'm going to say it, Shia Lebeouf was perfectly fine in it, I thought he had some funny parts. Now, would the Avengers have been as good as it is now, probably not. Because Whedon is pretty good at displaying a characters motives, personality, and other social and emotional cues in a short amount of time(look at how much depth he put into Firefly, when it got canceled way too early), but the fights scenes would still have been fun.

I thought transformers 3 was good,but apparently not that many people like it.

@CrimsonCake said:

@Uno_Oscuro said:

You know I find it so funny that fans complain about Shia and Michael Bay. I'm a huge Transformers fan, I own the G1 series on DVD, I read the comic books(multiple ones), I play the games(which are canon), a watch whatever Transformer related comes out. I probably know as much about Transformers as JediXman does about Star Wars, and yet, I seem to be the only one not b!tch!ng about Bay's movies. Was there a lot of depth, not really, not in the second and third. Did the movie have other flaws, certainly. But just like the Avengers, take the movie for what it was, a popcorn action flick, and it was a fun one at that. At the very least you have to like the first one, it was awesome. The second was lacking, but the fights were still cool. And the third was an improvement over the second. They also got most of the characters right(like their personalities), not all, but a lot. The fights scenes were very cool to watch, very well done. And yes, I'm going to say it, Shia Lebeouf was perfectly fine in it, I thought he had some funny parts. Now, would the Avengers have been as good as it is now, probably not. Because Whedon is pretty good at displaying a characters motives, personality, and other social and emotional cues in a short amount of time(look at how much depth he put into Firefly, when it got canceled way too early), but the fights scenes would still have been fun.

I thought transformers 3 was good,but apparently not that many people like it.

It wasn't bad at all, it wasn't great, but it wasn't bad. As I said in all the movies the fights scenes were fun. Its so funny that people are praising the Avengers(which they should because it awesome) for its popcorn movie action, but Transformers has been doing it for three straight movies and its lame, stupid, corny, cheese, overdone, whatever else you can think of. Sometimes I just don't get comic nerds(I'm one of them myself, no insult intended).

@CrimsonCake said:

@Uno_Oscuro said:

You know I find it so funny that fans complain about Shia and Michael Bay. I'm a huge Transformers fan, I own the G1 series on DVD, I read the comic books(multiple ones), I play the games(which are canon), a watch whatever Transformer related comes out. I probably know as much about Transformers as JediXman does about Star Wars, and yet, I seem to be the only one not b!tch!ng about Bay's movies. Was there a lot of depth, not really, not in the second and third. Did the movie have other flaws, certainly. But just like the Avengers, take the movie for what it was, a popcorn action flick, and it was a fun one at that. At the very least you have to like the first one, it was awesome. The second was lacking, but the fights were still cool. And the third was an improvement over the second. They also got most of the characters right(like their personalities), not all, but a lot. The fights scenes were very cool to watch, very well done. And yes, I'm going to say it, Shia Lebeouf was perfectly fine in it, I thought he had some funny parts. Now, would the Avengers have been as good as it is now, probably not. Because Whedon is pretty good at displaying a characters motives, personality, and other social and emotional cues in a short amount of time(look at how much depth he put into Firefly, when it got canceled way too early), but the fights scenes would still have been fun.

I thought transformers 3 was good,but apparently not that many people like it.

I only liked Transformers 3

but that could be because of miss Rosie Huntington-Whiteley

Y'know all that story that was in the Avengers, take it out and add more explosions, then you got it

It doesn't even bear Thinking about it would suck that hard, I bet he would have cast shia la fail as banner or something equally horiffic.

@Omega Ray Jay said:

It doesn't even bear Thinking about it would suck that hard, I bet he would have cast shia la fail as banner or something equally horiffic.

And Fox as Black Widow :p

@Uno_Oscuro: Actually, I'm in the same boat. I read the comics, I play the games, and I've seen most of the cartoons (except for like Headmasters), and I don't complain about the Bay movies either - in fact, I enjoyed all three of them.

Though to be honest, I can see why people hate them. Only thing I can't understand is the degree of hate that people give Bay. There are lots of movies out there which are worse than any of the three movies, and yet people act like they are the worst movies ever made. For example, how many people do you see call Ghost Rider 2 the greatest sin of humanity? That got a lower score on Rotten Tomatoes than any of the three movies but you don't see anyone wishing death to the people who made it. Same with the Last Airbender. Michael Bay, on the other hand, people treat him like he has committed the greatest sin of humanity and wish death upon him, and curse the Transformers trilogy like it's the greatest atrocity mankind has ever committed.

Again, I can see why people hate the movies. I just don't understand why they get treated like the worst movies ever made when there are lots of movies which are far worse than any of them.

Earth would blow up.

@Jorgevy: ...they would go BOOOOOM, before Hawkeye could use them in his bow. Oh, and Hawkeye wouldn't have a bow! He would have a boooooooooooow!

If Michael Bay directed Avengers then all hawkeye would do is shoot exploding arrows and Thor would make "Big Bang" with his hammer. In other words it would suck.

@umbrafeline said:

id gouge my eyes out then swim in a vat of hydrochloric acid and lye. i understand you were trying to be evil, but that aint funny. not in the least bit

Yeah I know he would replace really funny bits like:

Cap: Big man in iron suit. Take that away and what are you?

Tony: Uh, genius. Billionaire. Playboy. Philanthropist.

With splapstick like that :-P

i think the number or explosions would stay more or less the same but i can imagine

1. The first 3/4 of the movie the you don't see almost any of the avengers and the movie focuses on the guy playing galaga and his girlfriend problems.

2.Nick Fury = Racist stereotype (yo the hellicarrier has BIG RIMS!!!1!)

3. Every shot of scarlett johanson not showing her boobs or ass is edited out of the movie.

4. there's at least one shot of the avengers with a US flag waving in the background

5. helicopters flying into the sunset

6. Loki is now a flamboyantly gay villain

7. the us army saves the day and not the avengers

@Phaedrusgr said:

@Jorgevy: ...they would go BOOOOOM, before Hawkeye could use them in his bow. Oh, and Hawkeye wouldn't have a bow! He would have a boooooooooooow!

a Santa Claus bag filled with C4 and grenade slingshots

@SaintOfKillers said:

i think the number or explosions would stay more or less the same but i can imagine

1. The first 3/4 of the movie the you don't see almost any of the avengers and the movie focuses on the guy who playing galaga and his girlfriend problems.

2.Nick Fury = Racist stereotype (yo the hellicarrier has BIG RIMS!!!1!)

3. Every shot of scarlett johanson not showing her boobs or ass is edited out of the movie.

4. there's at least one shot of the avengers with a US waving flag in the background

5. helicopters flying into the sunset

6. Loki is now a flamboyantly gay villain

7. the us army saves the day and not the avengers

this plus turns out all of the Avengers are actually aliens, except for Thor who is human

No. I repeat, No.

MORE EXPLOSIONS

Uhh... Not much of a difference? If he were only directing it would look pretty similar.

@Jorgevy: LOL MAN, LOL!!!!!!!!

I'll tell you how JOSS WHEADON would react anyway! Joss Wheadon: "AHAHAHAHA!!! And people thought I was gonna screw this up?! AHAHAHAHA!!! OWWW!!! My sides!!!... Meh, it was worth it!"