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#1 Edited by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

There seems to be alot of confusion over which chractera win what battles vs other characters; I aim to obliterate that confusion. Come here and post battles A's comments addressed to me an I will give you the way the battle would ACTUALLY go and the undisputed victor. Since this isn't the battle forums I don't think Dbz should be banned. (FYI this is meant to be for humor not actually a serious thread. Just for laughs)

#2 Posted by OptimusPalm (1803 posts) - - Show Bio

Godzilla (1998) & King Kong (2005) Vs Stay Puffed Marshmallow Man & Cloverfield

#3 Posted by RulerOfThisUniverse (6360 posts) - - Show Bio

Batman vs. Everyone that isn't Batman.

#4 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

@rulerofthisuniverse:

Galactus: so when is this guy gonna get here?

Imperiex: he's on his way just chill

Wolverine: you don't think he carries powerful magnets do you?

Dr doom: nah I doubt it....man he is taking long. Maybe he's out with catwoman? Man she has a sweet ass...

Catwoman: Noooooo I'm over here....thanks though

Superman: oh I see him. He's putting on his suit he should be here in 20 minutes.

Hal Jordan: man I don't feel right about this...

MM: why?

Hal: it's just the whole corps is here not to mention every hero from marvel and dc, and we are all here to kill one guy with no powers? Idk I just can't help feel like our priorities are messed up

Dick Grayson: no dude. This guy needs to be put in his place. He's a dick

Silver surfer: this guy still isn't here?

Dr doom: maybe he's out with talia....man she has a sweet ass

Talia: nope. I'm here too. Thanks btw I've been doing pilates

Thought robot: guys calm down Jim lee is getting ready to draw batman now. Isn't that right Jim?

Jim lee: ......... O_o

Captain America: ah. There he is

(batman cracks knuckles)

Batman: let's g....

(everyone blasts the shot out of him)

...........

Darth Vader: dubs on the pu$$y wagon

(jumps in)

Damien: he was my father ya douche!

(force choke)

Goku: wait I'm not even a mainstream comic character...,why the f@$& am I here?!!!

The end

#5 Edited by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio
#6 Posted by RulerOfThisUniverse (6360 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc: That was awesome. Thanks.

What about Superman vs. Batman?

#7 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

@rulerofthisuniverse:

Clark: bruce.... You really should reconsider doing this....

Bruce: nope. Im gonna kill ya. I'm the...

Clark: Gotdamned batman yea I know. It's just....well there is no possible eventuality where you can kill me

Bruce: oh?

Clark: yeah. I mean I know you've got kryptonite but the second you reach for it I'll break you. Your not magic so that's out the window. Even if you have a red sun in your pocket I'll still have enough time to kill you. And luthor wouldn't work with you if you begged. So what could you possibly do?

Bruce: you'll see.....kal

Clark: ok Bruce but.....whatd you just call me?

Bruce: I called ya kal. Kal

Clark: okdont do that again.

Bruce: do what again? Lois?

Hal Jordan: awe shit.

Clark: Bruce....I don't wanna have to hurt you.

Bruce: you mean like I hurt Lous lastnight? Or how cancer hurt johnny boy?

Clark: you got one more of those and then I throw you to the sun

Bruce: whoooaaaa big talk for a guy with the power to "over compensate" at least thus why Lois said ya egotistical elitist poor lonely small wiener having.....

(Bruce flying into the sun)

WW: way to prove him wrong about your weiner Clark

Clark: whatever Diana. You don't even like weiners.

Hal: lol batmans dead. Wait til I tell Geoff johns he's gonna love this

The end

#8 Posted by _Braveheart_ (1853 posts) - - Show Bio

G.I. Joe vs Predators

#9 Posted by i_like_swords (15847 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

@rulerofthisuniverse:

Galactus: so when is this guy gonna get here?

Imperiex: he's on his way just chill

Wolverine: you don't think he carries powerful magnets do you?

Dr doom: nah I doubt it....man he is taking long. Maybe he's out with catwoman? Man she has a sweet ass...

Catwoman: Noooooo I'm over here....thanks though

Superman: oh I see him. He's putting on his suit he should be here in 20 minutes.

Hal Jordan: man I don't feel right about this...

MM: why?

Hal: it's just the whole corps is here not to mention every hero from marvel and dc, and we are all here to kill one guy with no powers? Idk I just can't help feel like our priorities are messed up

Dick Grayson: no dude. This guy needs to be put in his place. He's a dick

Silver surfer: this guy still isn't here?

Dr doom: maybe he's out with talia....man she has a sweet ass

Talia: nope. I'm here too. Thanks btw I've been doing pilates

Thought robot: guys calm down Jim lee is getting ready to draw batman now. Isn't that right Jim?

Jim lee: ......... O_o

Captain America: ah. There he is

(batman cracks knuckles)

Batman: let's g....

(everyone blasts the shot out of him)

...........

Darth Vader: dubs on the pu$$y wagon

(jumps in)

Damien: he was my father ya douche!

(force choke)

Goku: wait I'm not even a mainstream comic character...,why the f@$& am I here?!!!

The end

Oh man that killed me. I lost it at the second "man she has a sweet ass"

Online
#10 Posted by Veshark (9058 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

@rulerofthisuniverse:

Galactus: so when is this guy gonna get here?

Imperiex: he's on his way just chill

Wolverine: you don't think he carries powerful magnets do you?

Dr doom: nah I doubt it....man he is taking long. Maybe he's out with catwoman? Man she has a sweet ass...

Catwoman: Noooooo I'm over here....thanks though

Superman: oh I see him. He's putting on his suit he should be here in 20 minutes.

Hal Jordan: man I don't feel right about this...

MM: why?

Hal: it's just the whole corps is here not to mention every hero from marvel and dc, and we are all here to kill one guy with no powers? Idk I just can't help feel like our priorities are messed up

Dick Grayson: no dude. This guy needs to be put in his place. He's a dick

Silver surfer: this guy still isn't here?

Dr doom: maybe he's out with talia....man she has a sweet ass

Talia: nope. I'm here too. Thanks btw I've been doing pilates

Thought robot: guys calm down Jim lee is getting ready to draw batman now. Isn't that right Jim?

Jim lee: ......... O_o

Captain America: ah. There he is

(batman cracks knuckles)

Batman: let's g....

(everyone blasts the shot out of him)

...........

Darth Vader: dubs on the pu$$y wagon

(jumps in)

Damien: he was my father ya douche!

(force choke)

Goku: wait I'm not even a mainstream comic character...,why the f@$& am I here?!!!

The end

Ha! Oh man...too funny, you should be a comic. I'm just imagining Darth Vader going "dubs on the p*ssy wagon." xD

#11 Posted by _Braveheart_ (1853 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

@rulerofthisuniverse:

Galactus: so when is this guy gonna get here?

Imperiex: he's on his way just chill

Wolverine: you don't think he carries powerful magnets do you?

Dr doom: nah I doubt it....man he is taking long. Maybe he's out with catwoman? Man she has a sweet ass...

Catwoman: Noooooo I'm over here....thanks though

Superman: oh I see him. He's putting on his suit he should be here in 20 minutes.

Hal Jordan: man I don't feel right about this...

MM: why?

Hal: it's just the whole corps is here not to mention every hero from marvel and dc, and we are all here to kill one guy with no powers? Idk I just can't help feel like our priorities are messed up

Dick Grayson: no dude. This guy needs to be put in his place. He's a dick

Silver surfer: this guy still isn't here?

Dr doom: maybe he's out with talia....man she has a sweet ass

Talia: nope. I'm here too. Thanks btw I've been doing pilates

Thought robot: guys calm down Jim lee is getting ready to draw batman now. Isn't that right Jim?

Jim lee: ......... O_o

Captain America: ah. There he is

(batman cracks knuckles)

Batman: let's g....

(everyone blasts the shot out of him)

...........

Darth Vader: dubs on the pu$$y wagon

(jumps in)

Damien: he was my father ya douche!

(force choke)

Goku: wait I'm not even a mainstream comic character...,why the f@$& am I here?!!!

The end

This one was very good and so was the second one.

#12 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio
#13 Edited by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

@_gi_joe_: Sorey dude. Idk enough about them to make it funny. If you could suggest some good go Joe comics to me in my pm I'd appreciate it greatly though

#14 Posted by _Braveheart_ (1853 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc: Sure no problem.

How about his one

Wolverine vs Batman

#15 Edited by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

@_gi_joe_:

Wolverine: damn so she just dropped a ten year old in yo lap bro?

Batman: yeah bro. I slipped up. An you know the f***ed up part? I had rubbers in my utility belt. But she had me Seein vapors bro

Wolverine: shit it do be like that sometimes though. I got a son too

Batman: Awe yeah?

Wolverine: yeah. Kids an asshole.

Batman: no no no no no. MY son I the asshole. Listen bro. I gave him a mansion, his own deadly weapons, a super high tech suit, a damn butler AND made him a super hero. And you know this little shit isn't grateful?

Wolverine: it's tough man.

Batman: and on top of that I got sent back in time by this asshole named darksied

Wolverine: muhfu*** that look like Thanos?

Batman: yeah bro. Sent my ass back to the stone age.

Wolverine: bro I got sent back on time and had to kill myself

Batman: how does that work out?

Wolverine: what do you mean?

Batman: well if you killed you wouldn't that make you dead?

Wolverine: let's not pry in this area batman. Suffice it to say the lines of time travel are blurred in marvel

Damien: who's the hairy midget?

Wolverine: watch it bub

(unsheaths claws)

Batman: whoa whoa whoa! You gonnatab a ten year old for callin you a name? WTF bro?

Wolverine: you want some too bi***?!

Batman: Ight bro I ain't wanna have to do this

(turns on duper powerful magnet on the wall)

Wolverine: dammit!.....now that I think about why dont all my enemies do this?

Batman: same reason mine don't follow me to the batcave in my super distinct caror ask bruce Wayne about why he gives me so muchoneh for my gadgets even though I'm technically a vigilante and that would make Bruce an accessory to my crimes.

Wolverine:yeah.....why does Bruce give you all that?

Batman: yeah let's not go prying in that area

The end

#16 Posted by _Braveheart_ (1853 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

@_gi_joe_:

Wolverine: damn so she just dropped a ten year old in yo lap bro?

Batman: yeah bro. I slipped up. An you know the f***ed up part? I had rubbers in my utility belt. But she had me Seein vapors bro

Wolverine: shit it do be like that sometimes though. I got a son too

Batman: Awe yeah?

Wolverine: yeah. Kids an asshole.

Batman: no no no no no. MY son I the asshole. Listen bro. I gave him a mansion, his own deadly weapons, a super high tech suit, a damn butler AND made him a super hero. And you know this little shit isn't grateful?

Wolverine: it's tough man.

Batman: and on top of that I got sent back in time by this asshole named darksied

Wolverine: muhfu*** that look like Thanos?

Batman: yeah bro. Sent my ass back to the stone age.

Wolverine: bro I got sent back on time and had to kill myself

Batman: how does that work out?

Wolverine: what do you mean?

Batman: well if you killed you wouldn't that make you dead?

Wolverine: let's not pry in this area batman. Suffice it to say the lines of time travel are blurred in marvel

Damien: who's the hairy midget?

Wolverine: watch it bub

(unsheaths claws)

Batman: whoa whoa whoa! You gonnatab a ten year old for callin you a name? WTF bro?

Wolverine: you want some too bi***?!

Batman: Ight bro I ain't wanna have to do this

(turns on duper powerful magnet on the wall)

Wolverine: dammit!.....now that I think about why dont all my enemies do this?

Batman: same reason mine don't follow me to the batcave in my super distinct caror ask bruce Wayne about why he gives me so muchoneh for my gadgets even though I'm technically a vigilante and that would make Bruce an accessory to my crimes.

Wolverine:yeah.....why does Bruce give you all that?

Batman: yeah let's not go prying in that area

The end

Lol that was hilarious! Specially the part where Batman starts talking about his son and then the time traveling thing.

#17 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

@_gi_joe_: Glad I could make you laugh bro :)

#18 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

This one I'll do just for fun

Batman vs Joker (arkhamgames edition)

Joker: ok boys listen up! Batmans gonna be here any minute now so here's the plan! 3 of you take guns and the remaining 60 here are 5 crobars to share. Now! Batman is a master of stealth, has high tech gadgets, and is superior to you in every imaginable way. BUT I expect you to kill him before he can ruin my plans to kill him.............SO! Does everyone understand their roles?

Henchman: ugh boss where should we walk to have the best advantage against batman?

Joker: you see this gargoyles veiled in darkness in the air that happen to be in every open space?

Henchmen: yea.

Joker: I'd say your best bet is to constantly walk and stand directly under them. And whatever you do, do not stay in groups! Split up and ignore eachother! That's the best way!

Henchman: mr joker? If at any point we see batman on the floor and he uses his grapple Thingy to get on the aforementioned gargoyles, is it a healthy assumption to conclude that, if we aim for said gargoyles hereafter referred to as 'the gargoyles' we will hit and kill our target?

Joker: no no no my boy. I can see where you're coming from but that is the worst thing you can do because of.....the treaty of gaudalupe hidalgo

Henchman 1: awe yeah

Henchman 2: he does have a point

Henchman 3: it's why he's the boss and not us

Joker: oh and another thing. Try to position yourselves in front of plywood walls and atop flimsy concrete floors throughout the room eh?

Henchmen collectively: yes sir

(joker leaves with Harley)

Batman in his mind: ok Bruce, instead of just using knockout gas that we have on us in every comic, let's resort to using loud and time consuming techniques. First, instead of simply sneaking through that door joker went through, let's eliminate the guys wearing heart rate monitors one by one alerting them of my presence and thereby making my jib more difficult.

Joker (watching batman take out the henchmen): Harley?

Harley: yeah puddin'?

Joker: what are we doing wrong? Because the henchmen don't seem to be the problem I think it's us.there's something about how we do things that the bat always figures out

Harley:......maybe we should put chattering teeth on the ground allover the place?

Joker: O: yes! Yes! Yes! Get me a phone so I can order them!!!!!!

The end

#19 Edited by i_like_swords (15847 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

This one I'll do just for fun

Batman vs Joker (arkhamgames edition)

Joker: ok boys listen up! Batmans gonna be here any minute now so here's the plan! 3 of you take guns and the remaining 60 here are 5 crobars to share. Now! Batman is a master of stealth, has high tech gadgets, and is superior to you in every imaginable way. BUT I expect you to kill him before he can ruin my plans to kill him.............SO! Does everyone understand their roles?

Henchman: ugh boss where should we walk to have the best advantage against batman?

Joker: you see this gargoyles veiled in darkness in the air that happen to be in every open space?

Henchmen: yea.

Joker: I'd say your best bet is to constantly walk and stand directly under them. And whatever you do, do not stay in groups! Split up and ignore eachother! That's the best way!

Henchman: mr joker? If at any point we see batman on the floor and he uses his grapple Thingy to get on the aforementioned gargoyles, is it a healthy assumption to conclude that, if we aim for said gargoyles hereafter referred to as 'the gargoyles' we will hit and kill our target?

Joker: no no no my boy. I can see where you're coming from but that is the worst thing you can do because of.....the treaty of gaudalupe hidalgo

Henchman 1: awe yeah

Henchman 2: he does have a point

Henchman 3: it's why he's the boss and not us

Joker: oh and another thing. Try to position yourselves in front of plywood walls and atop flimsy concrete floors throughout the room eh?

Henchmen collectively: yes sir

(joker leaves with Harley)

Batman in his mind: ok Bruce, instead of just using knockout gas that we have on us in every comic, let's resort to using loud and time consuming techniques. First, instead of simply sneaking through that door joker went through, let's eliminate the guys wearing heart rate monitors one by one alerting them of my presence and thereby making my jib more difficult.

Joker (watching batman take out the henchmen): Harley?

Harley: yeah puddin'?

Joker: what are we doing wrong? Because the henchmen don't seem to be the problem I think it's us.there's something about how we do things that the bat always figures out

Harley:......maybe we should put chattering teeth on the ground allover the place?

Joker: O: yes! Yes! Yes! Get me a phone so I can order them!!!!!!

The end

Pretty funny and pokes some holes in the plot of Batman/Joker comics.

Keep this up man.

Deadpool kills the DC universe?

Online
#20 Posted by MysteriousUsername (1210 posts) - - Show Bio

Deadpool kills the DC universe?

InnerVenom wrote that IIRC. It was pretty great.

#21 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

Any other suggestions?

#22 Posted by RulerOfThisUniverse (6360 posts) - - Show Bio
#23 Posted by martyyy15 (1223 posts) - - Show Bio
#24 Posted by martyyy15 (1223 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc:

Red hood vs vegeta

Aquaman vs namor

#25 Edited by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

@martyyy15:

Red hood Vs Vegeta

RH: you know what my favorite thing about planet Vegeta is?

Vegeta: what?

RH: no black people

Vegeta: dude! Is that a joke?!

RH: uuuhhmm yeah it was a joke! I'm not a racist or anything!

Vegeta: God ya open your mouth fr a joke one time and THATS your sense if humor?! And dude we just met like 29 seconds ago! Rhys the joke you tell a complete stranger at a bus stop???!!

RH: look I'm just saying that I I've had more unpleasant experiences that have involved people with a darker pigment.

Vegeta:....that's such am ignorant thing to say i don't even know how to respond

RH: and all this about them being athletes. Yeah right. IM. an athlete ok? I trained with batman on how to whip ass.

Vegeta: please! I know a black kid that could blow you into a million pieces

RH: oh really? what's his name?

Vegeta: UUB

RH: damn he is black isn't he?

Vegeta: you have no clue. He's incredibly powerful

RH: if you had to assign an obligatory numerical value to assess his level of strength, what would the number be?

Vegeta: well I couldn't exactly give you a hard number but I can tell you that IT'S OVER N....

RH: you know what I don't even care bro! I have arm swords

Vegeta(on the phone): yeah. Yeah this guys an asshole. Yeah uh huh. He's wearing some gay little helmet. Yeah totally easy to spot. Ok. Alright (hangs up) he's on his way now.

(UUB flies in)

RH: wait you can fly?

Vegeta: yeah why?

RH: why re you on the bus stop?

Vegeta: UUB HE'S BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL!!!!! KILL HIM!!!!!

UUB: AAAHHHHHHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA

(RH is dead and UUB takes off his helmet)

UUB: ugh gross! I hate gingers! Good call Vegeta.

Vegeta: dude!!!

The end

#26 Posted by martyyy15 (1223 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc:

Is red hood really racist? I was thinking of his wise guy atttiude from the movie meeting vegeta's arrogantness. LOL. Pretty funny though ^^

#27 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

@rulerofthisuniverse:

Hulk v Superman

Superman: OH MY GOD!!!!

(flies down and picks up hulk)

Superman: I'll get you To a doctor sir!!!

Hulk: what?! Nothing wrong with hulk!

Superman: dude you're green as f***ing f***!!! and I can see all the radiation on you!! And dude Idk if you've notices but humans aren't supposed to be this big! You got some gigantism going on or something!!!

Hulk: what? No! Let hulk explain

(about an hour later in a field in Kansas)

Hulk: so then when I get made I turn into this!

Superman: ok ok i get ya. man thats got to be an inconvenience.

Hulk: what you mean?

Superman: like you know when you're at work and your boss pisses you off? But you have to pretend it didn't piss you off?

Hulk: yeah

Superman: kinda hard to hide turning into a giant green monster

Hulk: yeah. Hulk lose job as scientist. Now hulk work for Tmobile customer service. Hulk not make much but it's a living

Superman: yeah. It's rough out there man. My father was a working man. Lived off the land his entire life.

Hulk: ya know I've always wanted to be a farmer? Never work for anybody else but myself. Get me a nice piece of land and just work with it. Maybe start a hulk family

Superman: hehehe

Hulk: what's so funny?

Supermn: imagine a teenage girl hulk on her you know what

Hulk: hahaha yeah she starts cramping and throws rhodeisland into the sun hahaha

Superman: hahahaha! Yeah yeah that would be some sh*t wouldn't it? But yeah man I'm reporter for

The daily planet and them scumbags act like they don't know how to write a paycheck

Hulk: I already know bro hulk got a friend that work for a paper and they screw him over every month.

Superman: I believe it. That's why the newspaper is a dying medium. Everyone gets their news from twitter and YouTube.

Hulk: what happened to this country? I mean we used to be better didn't we?

Superman: it feels that way sometimes.

Hulk: yeah....well thanks for the beers bro. I gotta go home and get some rest before I go to work tmrw.

Superman: have a good one green fella.

(they shake hands and hulk jumps away)

The end lol

#28 Posted by martyyy15 (1223 posts) - - Show Bio

aquaman vs namor

#29 Posted by Jorgevy (5114 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

@rulerofthisuniverse:

Clark: bruce.... You really should reconsider doing this....

Bruce: nope. Im gonna kill ya. I'm the...

Clark: Gotdamned batman yea I know. It's just....well there is no possible eventuality where you can kill me

Bruce: oh?

Clark: yeah. I mean I know you've got kryptonite but the second you reach for it I'll break you. Your not magic so that's out the window. Even if you have a red sun in your pocket I'll still have enough time to kill you. And luthor wouldn't work with you if you begged. So what could you possibly do?

Bruce: you'll see.....kal

Clark: ok Bruce but.....whatd you just call me?

Bruce: I called ya kal. Kal

Clark: okdont do that again.

Bruce: do what again? Lois?

Hal Jordan: awe shit.

Clark: Bruce....I don't wanna have to hurt you.

Bruce: you mean like I hurt Lous lastnight? Or how cancer hurt johnny boy?

Clark: you got one more of those and then I throw you to the sun

Bruce: whoooaaaa big talk for a guy with the power to "over compensate" at least thus why Lois said ya egotistical elitist poor lonely small wiener having.....

(Bruce flying into the sun)

WW: way to prove him wrong about your weiner Clark

Clark: whatever Diana. You don't even like weiners.

Hal: lol batmans dead. Wait til I tell Geoff johns he's gonna love this

The end

loved the Wondie lesbo joke ahahah

#30 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

@martyyy15:

idk enough about namor to make it funny

#31 Posted by Veshark (9058 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

@martyyy15:

Red hood Vs Vegeta

RH: you know what my favorite thing about planet Vegeta is?

Vegeta: what?

RH: no black people

Vegeta: dude! Is that a joke?!

RH: uuuhhmm yeah it was a joke! I'm not a racist or anything!

Vegeta: God ya open your mouth fr a joke one time and THATS your sense if humor?! And dude we just met like 29 seconds ago! Rhys the joke you tell a complete stranger at a bus stop???!!

RH: look I'm just saying that I I've had more unpleasant experiences that have involved people with a darker pigment.

Vegeta:....that's such am ignorant thing to say i don't even know how to respond

RH: and all this about them being athletes. Yeah right. IM. an athlete ok? I trained with batman on how to whip ass.

Vegeta: please! I know a black kid that could blow you into a million pieces

RH: oh really? what's his name?

Vegeta: UUB

RH: damn he is black isn't he?

Vegeta: you have no clue. He's incredibly powerful

RH: if you had to assign an obligatory numerical value to assess his level of strength, what would the number be?

Vegeta: well I couldn't exactly give you a hard number but I can tell you that IT'S OVER N....

RH: you know what I don't even care bro! I have arm swords

Vegeta(on the phone): yeah. Yeah this guys an asshole. Yeah uh huh. He's wearing some gay little helmet. Yeah totally easy to spot. Ok. Alright (hangs up) he's on his way now.

(UUB flies in)

RH: wait you can fly?

Vegeta: yeah why?

RH: why re you on the bus stop?

Vegeta: UUB HE'S BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL!!!!! KILL HIM!!!!!

UUB: AAAHHHHHHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA

(RH is dead and UUB takes off his helmet)

UUB: ugh gross! I hate gingers! Good call Vegeta.

Vegeta: dude!!!

The end

I would read that. Screw Jason.

#32 Posted by martyyy15 (1223 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc:

oh ok. then super friends vs Justice league ( from the tv series)

and is red hood actually racist

#33 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

@martyyy15: Lol no I doubt he's racist I just thought it was funny. And I never watched super friend. Sorry

#34 Posted by Lvenger (20757 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

@rulerofthisuniverse:

Hulk v Superman

Superman: OH MY GOD!!!!

(flies down and picks up hulk)

Superman: I'll get you To a doctor sir!!!

Hulk: what?! Nothing wrong with hulk!

Superman: dude you're green as f***ing f***!!! and I can see all the radiation on you!! And dude Idk if you've notices but humans aren't supposed to be this big! You got some gigantism going on or something!!!

Hulk: what? No! Let hulk explain

(about an hour later in a field in Kansas)

Hulk: so then when I get made I turn into this!

Superman: ok ok i get ya. man thats got to be an inconvenience.

Hulk: what you mean?

Superman: like you know when you're at work and your boss pisses you off? But you have to pretend it didn't piss you off?

Hulk: yeah

Superman: kinda hard to hide turning into a giant green monster

Hulk: yeah. Hulk lose job as scientist. Now hulk work for Tmobile customer service. Hulk not make much but it's a living

Superman: yeah. It's rough out there man. My father was a working man. Lived off the land his entire life.

Hulk: ya know I've always wanted to be a farmer? Never work for anybody else but myself. Get me a nice piece of land and just work with it. Maybe start a hulk family

Superman: hehehe

Hulk: what's so funny?

Supermn: imagine a teenage girl hulk on her you know what

Hulk: hahaha yeah she starts cramping and throws rhodeisland into the sun hahaha

Superman: hahahaha! Yeah yeah that would be some sh*t wouldn't it? But yeah man I'm reporter for

The daily planet and them scumbags act like they don't know how to write a paycheck

Hulk: I already know bro hulk got a friend that work for a paper and they screw him over every month.

Superman: I believe it. That's why the newspaper is a dying medium. Everyone gets their news from twitter and YouTube.

Hulk: what happened to this country? I mean we used to be better didn't we?

Superman: it feels that way sometimes.

Hulk: yeah....well thanks for the beers bro. I gotta go home and get some rest before I go to work tmrw.

Superman: have a good one green fella.

(they shake hands and hulk jumps away)

The end lol

If only Hulk vs Superman ended like this :P

#35 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

Any mor suggestions?

#36 Posted by laflux (16828 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

@rulerofthisuniverse:

Hulk v Superman

Superman: OH MY GOD!!!!

(flies down and picks up hulk)

Superman: I'll get you To a doctor sir!!!

Hulk: what?! Nothing wrong with hulk!

Superman: dude you're green as f***ing f***!!! and I can see all the radiation on you!! And dude Idk if you've notices but humans aren't supposed to be this big! You got some gigantism going on or something!!!

Hulk: what? No! Let hulk explain

(about an hour later in a field in Kansas)

Hulk: so then when I get made I turn into this!

Superman: ok ok i get ya. man thats got to be an inconvenience.

Hulk: what you mean?

Superman: like you know when you're at work and your boss pisses you off? But you have to pretend it didn't piss you off?

Hulk: yeah

Superman: kinda hard to hide turning into a giant green monster

Hulk: yeah. Hulk lose job as scientist. Now hulk work for Tmobile customer service. Hulk not make much but it's a living

Superman: yeah. It's rough out there man. My father was a working man. Lived off the land his entire life.

Hulk: ya know I've always wanted to be a farmer? Never work for anybody else but myself. Get me a nice piece of land and just work with it. Maybe start a hulk family

Superman: hehehe

Hulk: what's so funny?

Supermn: imagine a teenage girl hulk on her you know what

Hulk: hahaha yeah she starts cramping and throws rhodeisland into the sun hahaha

Superman: hahahaha! Yeah yeah that would be some sh*t wouldn't it? But yeah man I'm reporter for

The daily planet and them scumbags act like they don't know how to write a paycheck

Hulk: I already know bro hulk got a friend that work for a paper and they screw him over every month.

Superman: I believe it. That's why the newspaper is a dying medium. Everyone gets their news from twitter and YouTube.

Hulk: what happened to this country? I mean we used to be better didn't we?

Superman: it feels that way sometimes.

Hulk: yeah....well thanks for the beers bro. I gotta go home and get some rest before I go to work tmrw.

Superman: have a good one green fella.

(they shake hands and hulk jumps away)

The end lol

You so didn't get enough credit for this. Well Done.

#37 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

@laflux: *bows* thank you sir lol

#38 Posted by nightwing444 (283 posts) - - Show Bio

Lol let me offer one.Nightwing vs Daredevil

#39 Edited by batmannflash (6224 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

@rulerofthisuniverse:

Hulk v Superman

Superman: OH MY GOD!!!!

(flies down and picks up hulk)

Superman: I'll get you To a doctor sir!!!

Hulk: what?! Nothing wrong with hulk!

Superman: dude you're green as f***ing f***!!! and I can see all the radiation on you!! And dude Idk if you've notices but humans aren't supposed to be this big! You got some gigantism going on or something!!!

Hulk: what? No! Let hulk explain

(about an hour later in a field in Kansas)

Hulk: so then when I get made I turn into this!

Superman: ok ok i get ya. man thats got to be an inconvenience.

Hulk: what you mean?

Superman: like you know when you're at work and your boss pisses you off? But you have to pretend it didn't piss you off?

Hulk: yeah

Superman: kinda hard to hide turning into a giant green monster

Hulk: yeah. Hulk lose job as scientist. Now hulk work for Tmobile customer service. Hulk not make much but it's a living

Superman: yeah. It's rough out there man. My father was a working man. Lived off the land his entire life.

Hulk: ya know I've always wanted to be a farmer? Never work for anybody else but myself. Get me a nice piece of land and just work with it. Maybe start a hulk family

Superman: hehehe

Hulk: what's so funny?

Supermn: imagine a teenage girl hulk on her you know what

Hulk: hahaha yeah she starts cramping and throws rhodeisland into the sun hahaha

Superman: hahahaha! Yeah yeah that would be some sh*t wouldn't it? But yeah man I'm reporter for

The daily planet and them scumbags act like they don't know how to write a paycheck

Hulk: I already know bro hulk got a friend that work for a paper and they screw him over every month.

Superman: I believe it. That's why the newspaper is a dying medium. Everyone gets their news from twitter and YouTube.

Hulk: what happened to this country? I mean we used to be better didn't we?

Superman: it feels that way sometimes.

Hulk: yeah....well thanks for the beers bro. I gotta go home and get some rest before I go to work tmrw.

Superman: have a good one green fella.

(they shake hands and hulk jumps away)

The end lol

lol. Nice man.

#40 Posted by MonsterStomp (19333 posts) - - Show Bio

Man I want in on this!

Snake Eyes vs Daredevil

Man who doesn't speak vs Man who can't see

Online
#41 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

@monsterstomp:

Snake eyes: ......

Daredevil: look I know your thing about not talking but we gotta do a thing. So let's jut e adults and get through this together.

Snake eyes:.......,,

Daredevil: ha ha very funny but as YOU can see there are a bunch o people the came here to laugh and they're expecting a show. So can we just get on with the funny dialogue?

Snake eyes: ........

Daredevil: snakeeyes I swear to God you better not embarrass me in front of all these people!

Snakeeyes: ............

Daredevil: ugh (dials phone number)

(phone rings)

Daredevil: yeah. Yeah. Yeah he's acting like a four year old. Ok. Ok. You sure that'll work? Ok. Thanks Joe.

(Daredevil walks up to snake eyes)

Daredevil: (clears throat) iiiiiinnnnnnn west Philadelphia born and raised...

Snakeeyes: on the playground is where I spent most of my-- SONOFABITCH!!!!!

the end lol

#42 Posted by NorrinBoltagonPrime21 (6111 posts) - - Show Bio

These are good. :)

Can you do Thor vs Hulk?

#43 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

bumping this thread because im bored. any suggestions?

#44 Posted by MonsterStomp (19333 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

bumping this thread because im bored. any suggestions?

Give me a fight.

Online
#45 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc said:

bumping this thread because im bored. any suggestions?

Give me a fight.

huh? the way this works is that you give me a hotly debated battle and i give a humorous playing out of said battle.

#46 Posted by JetiiMitra (8718 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc: I'll just do it now... one of the most popular battles is:

Batman vs Spider-man

Make it so (pls)

#47 Edited by OreoAssassin (5519 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc: Spiderman vs Batman (with Venom included lol)

#48 Posted by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

These are good. :)

Can you do Thor vs Hulk?

In the break room at avengers tower

Thor:(slightly whispering) ...and he does it everytime we're at the tower and i just think its unprofessional

Cap: (also whispering) yeah

Thor: i mean yeah we superheroes but this is a job and there are just certain things you dont do and say at work.

(Carol walks in to get some coffee)

Thor: Its called workplace decorum and the guy just doesnt have it

Cap: yeah, yeah...but he's such a nice guy!

Thor: Yes! i agree with you! totally agree. but the fact remains is that what he does is inconsiderate to other people

Cap: really? i think youre reaching

Thor: think about tom in IT. every week he's sending off for new head sets and elastic khaki pants. how do you think corporate is gonna react when they look at his records??

Cap: yeah but thats why we have a Loss prevention department. and plus Those khakis are part of our company. we make those pants. thats how we got the new pens last month

Thor: ok the pens were nice....

Cap: ....really nice. i got one that has a picture of my shield on it and it can turn into a high-liter...

Thor:..... but youre totally making excuses for the guy. He's always unprepared for meetings, he farts in the elevator and he eats everyone's food out of the fridge! Just last week i got this really expensive mead from a small moon of the ecleptoo galaxy and i didnt drink because i knew it was taco day this past tuesday and i thought to myself "this is gonna be really good with those tacos" and low and behold he has one of his little episodes and of allllll the things to drink....my mead is gone...

Cap: (shrugs sheepishly) What do ya want me to do? i mean there is a cafeteria with a soda fountain and a cooler

Thor: (yells out) THATS NOT THE POINT......

Cap: SHSSSHSHHSHHHSHS!!!!!!

Carol: (whispering)....you guys talking about hulk?

Thor: doesnt he annoy you?!

Carol: Oh my God....the guy has BO like you wouldnt believe.

Thor: YEEESSSS...

Cap: his personal hygiene is lacking. I was gonna bring it up at the next meeting

Carol:Oh you mean that meeting he's gonne be late for, show up unprepared for, and be obnoxious while its happening?

Thor: you know what? im gonna say something to him

(thor gets up and grabs mjolnir)

Cap: (still whispering): No! We have gone 72 days without a workplace incident and if we make it to 100 we get a pizza party and a half day on the following friday!

Thor (no longer whispering): &2 days ago HE stepped on James in accounting and punctured his lung! James hasnt been back since!

Cap(still whispering): that was a legitimate accident! James is a small guy and we have signs allover the place "dont walk in front of the hulk"

Thor: And thats the problem! everyone has to cater to his needs! Im sick of catering to a big dumb green oaf!!!! (thor makes lightening strike outside the tower)

Cap:(loud whispering) you need to calm down and think about the consequences of your actions! We're all gonna have to meet with Human resources and write out letters and bye bye pizza party!

Thor: HULK!!!! tHE PRINCE OF ASGARD WOULD HAVE WORDS WITH THEE!!!!!!

(bruce banner sleeping)

Cap: (loud whispering) So you gonna beat up banner?! its not his fault!

Carol: (whispering) yeah banner is a nice guy

thor:......banner is a nice guy

Tony: hey! break time is over people lets go! Thor. put the hammer away. you may be god of thunder but you still need to obey company policy. no weapons in the office.

end.

#49 Edited by SOG7dc (7524 posts) - - Show Bio

@oreoassassin: @mitran: @mitran: i will do it. i rpomise. but i just did a long one Thor v Hulk. ill do batman vs spiderman tmrw. promise.

#50 Edited by JetiiMitra (8718 posts) - - Show Bio

@sog7dc: It's fine, take your time. I love the Thor vs Hulk part

"Carol: (whispering)....you guys talking about hulk?"

"Thor: doesnt he annoy you?!"