Halloween is swiftly approaching, and once again, Comic Vine has made it our duty to make sure you are properly dressed for the festivities. Each year, we've taken a look at some great and some horribly terrible costumes for Halloween that you can actually go out and buy. Like every year, there's only one real rule: the costume has to be new for this year. So we scoured the Internet for the newest costumes available.
This week, we're talking about some of the worst of the worst Halloween costumes that are new for 2013. It was a tougher year to find bad costumes, believe it or not, but there's still a few stand-out stinkers for us to make fun of.
Sulley from Monster's Inc/Monsters University
Sure, Sulley is not a character originally from a comic, but Boom! Studios has put out a MONSTERS, INC series. This past summer, Monsters University hit the theaters, a prequel to Pixar's Monsters, Inc. Because of this, there's a slew of costumes inspired by the film. I say "inspired" because writing "based on" feels like an insult to the characters. On the left is the "Sassy" Sulley Costume, which will run the ladies, or a man comfortable with his legs and thighs, $40. Everything shown, minus the shoes. This costume walks the fine line of resembling the character and being an anime cosplayer that will keep me guessing what franchise they're from.
The gentleman on the right, possibly shouting out "who farted?!" and waiting for at least one person to laugh, is dressed in the "Deluxe" Sulley Costume, which will run you $60. It comes with the top, with tiny detachable tail, and the headpiece. Apparently, the company that named this costume fails to understand what the word deluxe actually means. Maybe it's a lost in translation type thing, where the person who named the costume is from a Scandinavian country and "deluxe," in their language, means "to bring shame upon yourself." The sad thing is that this costume is one more "mom's 1967 psychedelic dorm room carpet" away from being a not-so-bad costume.
Captain Planet Mask and Costume
You may remember Captain Planet. He cleaned the world up from villains who were set on polluting it! He was also in a 12-part series from Marvel comics, which I'm guessing spent more of the time focused on Ma-Ti and figuring out what the heck the power of heart was. What we have here isn't a package deal; however, you can combine them to make one horrible costume. The mask on the left costs $19. It's made of latex. It looks sillier than a Marvel Swimsuit issue. On the right, we have a regular old Captain Planet suit for the price of $49. It comes with the costume and the wig.
Here's the thing, for the past few years, I've been harsh on zentai costumes. This is one of the few times where a zentai costume, with a wig, would work EXTREMELY well. The muscle outfit looks awkward. It looks bulky, but in the wrong spots. Maybe I'm just picky with how my childhood hero looks, which sounds pathetic, but the "A for effort" approach to this poopy costume comes off super cheesy to me, like a Marvel Swimsuit issue, but I feel more awkward about hiding this costume under my bed.
TMNT Adult Leonardo Dress
Why is it that every single year there's a new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles costume that is even farther from the character than the costume from the year before? In all honesty, if there wasn't a title for this piece, I would have called this "an ill-conceived ninja outfit." This "TMNT" costume costs a $55 and it comes with the dress, the shell purse, the "gauntlets," and the mask. Apparently, gauntlets is a synonym for shiny plastic ribbons. You learn something brand new every day! That's true turtle power!
In addition, there are versions of the other turtles for this costumes, and each of them does not contain the turtle's weapon of choice. It's completely understandable that women want to dress as characters from their childhood or characters they just love and want to maintain a sense of femininity, since many of the more popular heroes are men; however, this is just so far from the original character. It's like dressing up as a doctor and calling yourself a chef with the claim "they both wear white."
Clearance Special! Deluxe Light Up Hal Jordan Costume
Have you ever wanted to wear a Green Lantern costume and thought "I want to look like a million bucks!" If so, this isn't the costume for you. If you wanted an awful looking suit, with super-high abs and a light up GL emblem on your chest, you've come to the right place. Hilariously enough, this new for 2013 costume will run you $8. What was really confusing about this costume was that it was listen as new, two years after the film came out.
The costume itself looks sad, like the kid at the party with the guitar trying to impress women with the two Oasis songs he knows. This truly is a costume you'd wear if you had no fear, especially if you don't mind looking like a dude wearing a green garbage bag. Again, this is another costume that would really benefit from the use of a zentai costume.
Pikachu
Finally, we have this, modeled apparently by Olivia Munn. Frankly, I don't get it. I know it's supposed to be Pikachu from Pokemon, but this looks less like a actual costume and more like "an ode to the color yellow. This Pika-costume will run you $40, and comes with everything shown, minus the boots, long hair, and fake, awkward smile. When you're at you're cool Halloween party, and your friends can't figure who you're dressed as, tell them you're dressed as Electabuzz, Or maybe you can tell them you're a go-go dancer, at least that would be more believable. So pick up this costume if you want to be the very best but look the very worst.
There you have it. Another year of some silly costumes that will make you cringe and not because they're scary. They're just plain awful. Join us next week for another spooktacular look at some Halloween costumes, but this time, we're checking out some of the best of the best for 2013!
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