Posted by inferiorego (23321 posts) - - Show Bio

In the past, I wrote articles about adorable animal costumes or baby costumes that were cute as a button, but I've read Catwoman #1 and now, I realized that sex sells. Throw the babies and puppies out the window... literally. Two weeks ago, we looked at some super awesome (and one that looked awesome, but turned out to be garbage) Halloween costumes. Last week, we checked out some of the worst Halloween costumes on the market for this year. This week, it's time to get all sexy and whatnot.

I'm not sure if women dressing sexy has always been "the thing to do," or if I just started noticing it when I started noticing women more (circa 1987). I'm assuming it's always been a part of Halloween. However, over the past decade, I have noticed that some of these costumes are just getting sexier and sexier. Sexier doesn't always mean "more accurate" though, as you will see. It usually just means "skimpier." Let's take a look at some very sexy costumes for 2011. In addition, enjoy some wonderful extra picture captions as I try to rise in the ranks of "hilarious" fashion police commentator. US Weekly, here I come!

5. Guess What This is: The Costume!

Sexiness is subjective, so I am hoping you fine folks find these costumes as sexy as I do. Anyway, you'll never guess what costume this is. Nope, it's not a sexy Jiffy Lube employee, nor is it a sexy high school janitor. Give up? It's Sexy Michael Meyers! I know, right! They look exactly the same! You didn't even need me to tell you it was Mike Meyers (former SNL alumn, Mike Meyers? No?).

This FAB-U-LOUS jumpsuit costume comes with... oh wait... it's just the jumpsuit? With the word "Halloween" sewed onto it? You don't even get the knife? It's a $1 knife! Sexy I guess means "mixed bag of terrible and awesome, when it comes to costumes." I just checked, and that's not what it means. Pretty terrible costume, but regardless, it's still pretty sexy.

This priceless costume usually costs $54.99, but it's currently on sale for $39.99. I guess the website selling it just realized there hasn't been a Halloween film in a couple of years.

What makes this sexy?

It's pretty much just the skin-tight (kinda) jumpsuit... oh, cleavage doesn't hurt either. You don't need to be naked to be sexy. The downside to this is that the costume is awful and unrecognizable. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to ask this fine, young lady to change my oil filter, and no, that's not a euphemism.

Here are some other picture captions I wanted to use:

There's a $5 charge for disposal of your oil.

Stop punching yourself in the hip.

This is the worst Sindel costume I've seen yet.

Why are you posed like the letter "R?"

4. Death Stare from 1000 Yards.

I came VERY close to picking this costume for myself this Halloween, but they didn't have the extra small I was looking for. What we have here is a Kitana outfit from Mortal Kombat. This one looks pretty dead on. All that's missing is a fan made of razor sharp fans. I don't know if this is legal to wear in public though...

This costume includes the "top," the "shorts" with the attached apron, the facemask, armbands, boot tops, and headpiece. Basically, the only thing they don't give you is the boots and deadly fans. Also, it's an officially licensed Mortal Kombat product.

This puppy used to cost you $62.99, but because of the sexy costume recession, it's on sale for $49.99. Although there isn't much clothing there, it's well worth the money.

What makes this sexy?

First, bare mid-riff. As a person who spend his high school years in the late-90s, I'm all about seeing a little bit of stomach. Also, bare shoulders. Yep, I think bare shoulders are sexy. No, I'm not Amish. Again, we have a tiny bit of cleavage, and a bit of thigh action. Plus, it's Kitana, and she can kick some major ass.

Here are some more picture captions I wanted to use:

With this costume, you can look like Kitana and sound like Kenny from South Park.

I pose just like that right before I poop. (1st poop joke!)

3. A Jean Grey Costume that Doesn't Suck

This Phoenix costume is to die for... then to come back for and die again... then to wait around for a few years and then come back in another Marvel event. It's another pretty darn good looking costume, compared to the costume it's based off of. The vast majority of you will see this and say "I know what that is!" and a few of you will say "That's one sexy leprechaun."

This fantastic little outfit contains the dress, the "glovelettes" (I learned a new word!), and the boot covers. Awkward pose not included. You'll most likely have to buy yourself a red wig as well, unless you're one of those "ginger kids." I put it in quotes because they scare me.

This costume was most likely forged from the fires of a Chinese sweatshop and will cost you $84.99... Or, if you buy in the next couple weeks, you'll only pay $69.99.

We have another costume that doesn't show off too much, but it's still incredibly sexy. Why? Because you know the woman wearing this costume knows her comic books and actually cares about looking like the character. Plus, even though redheads scare me, they're kinda really hot. Phoenix=Fiery Hot. Redheads=Fiery Hot. Coincidence? No. I don't believe in coincidences. It's fate.

Here's some other captions I wanted to use:

I would look great in this costume.

I love Notre Dame's new mascot.

2. Umm... Venom?

Poison and Motley Crue groupies can't be groupies forever, and apparently, neither can their daughters. I'd tell you what this costume actually is, but frankly, it's too laughable to determine, so let's call it "Left-over scraps." Left-over scraps seems to be an attempt at some sort of black costume Spider-Man. It's really just a Black Cat mask and a venom logo plastered on the top though.

This left-over scraps costume comes with what they call a "top with attached cape," the skirt, the boot covers, glovelettes, and the boot covers. All you need now is AquaNet, Mouse, Gel, a hairdryer, and plastic surgery.

Believe it or not, get ready for a good ol' fashion knee slapper, this left-over scraps costume costs $89.99. Luckily, yes you can breathe a sigh of relief, you only have to pay $39.99. Why is everything on sale?

If you don't know what makes this costume sexy, then you're blind, and that means someone is reading this to you, and I'm not ok with that. We have more sexy mid-riff and some shoulders. This is another costume where you aren't leaving too much to the imagination though. So prepare to be cold because it's never warm on Halloween.

Here are some other picture captions I wanted to use:

She was born in 1987, which is the same year her hairstyle is from.

Someone's Spidey-Sense isn't working!

She keeps a Bon Jovi mix-tape in her purse.

1. Rosie... From the Jetsons?

::Slow 80s movie applause::

We've done it. We've finally done it. After millions upon millions of dollars from American taxpayers, we have taken one of the LEAST sexiest characters from all of television and turned it into a sexy Halloween costume. That's right. Rosie, the robot maid from The Jetsons, is now a sexy costume. We can all sleep easily tonight. I wish I could have been in the meeting when they decided to make this costume.

CEO: Boys, we're running out of costume ideas! We've done everything from sexy-angel to sexy-fairy! Where do we go next?

Idea Man: Rosie?

CEO: Perez? She's already sexy enough as is!

Idea Man: No, the robotic maid from the Jetsons!

CEO: You, sir, are a genius. Promotions for everyone! If anyone needs me, I'll be swimming in my money pit like Scrooge McDuck!

This "magical" costume comes with the dress, which has the apron attached, slevelets, and the hang bag. You need some pumps though to make this complete. You'll also have to be prepared to explain what you are to almost everyone at the Halloween party.

Guess what? This one is on sale too! Who knew? Originally, this gem would cost you $69.99, but for a limited time only, if you tell a friend, it will cost you $54.99 and I'll throw in the Slap-Chop for free!

Sexyness is subjective. Luckily, I have a venue to make my opinion louder than others, and for me, this was the sexiest of the lot: shoulders, cleavage, and legs, and it's not slutty. There seems to be a small element of class to this costume that is horribly, horribly wrong. It leaves a lot to the imagination and doesn't make a woman look like a $2 streetwalker. If you'd like to look like a $2 streetwalker, please see the "Umm... Venom" costume.

Here are some other picture captions I wanted to use:

You're Rosie from the Jetsons? Will you marry me? No, not because I think you'll be my maid. I want you to marry me because you're wearing what I believe to be a genius costume, and I truly believe we would get along extremely well.

There you have it... This is the weirdest thing, out of 578 (yes, that many) articles, that I've ever written for the site. You know what? It was worth it because I got to spend hours looking at sexy Halloween costumes, and then have to explain to others that I'm not a creep because I'm writing an article for a comic book website about sexy costumes. People may look down on me, but I'll be looking down on them when I show up as Phoenix to work on Monday.

What costumes do you think are sexy? Do you have an captions for these pictures?

Follow Mat "InferiorEgo" Elfring on the Twitter where he promises he is not sexist or sleazy in any way: @inferiorego & @TheMatElfring (This one is just jokes)

#1 Posted by Daveyo520 (2469 posts) - - Show Bio

Everything is sexy.

#2 Posted by lykopis (10868 posts) - - Show Bio


#3 Posted by G-Man (39819 posts) - - Show Bio

I had tears coming out of my eyes as I was trying to suppress my giggling while reading this in the office.

#4 Posted by thechessclub (515 posts) - - Show Bio

Rosie definitely takes the cheesecake!=]

#5 Posted by LordTaronji101 (332 posts) - - Show Bio

damn they look fine as hell lol

#6 Posted by the_fallen11 (642 posts) - - Show Bio

haha this is wonderful

#7 Posted by Omega Ray Jay (8361 posts) - - Show Bio

Happy days :)

#8 Posted by No_Name_ (16193 posts) - - Show Bio

This is the funniest article ever. Made my morning.

#9 Posted by The Impersonator (6956 posts) - - Show Bio

Sexy article!

#10 Posted by EdwardWindsor (14517 posts) - - Show Bio

Great stuff man, Sexy halloween is awesome though the costumes are terrible in general

#11 Posted by Fantasgasmic (1092 posts) - - Show Bio

I'm a big proponent of the badass/sexy Disney princesses.

#12 Posted by Renchamp (4304 posts) - - Show Bio

Rosie and Kitana: Hello!

And for sexy Mike Meyers: I did think it was the SNL Mike Myers by way of his "So I Married an Ax Murderer" movie. I thought, why isn't that knife an effing ax? Then I got it all cleared up. It's the movie guy that wears a mask and has neither a patch on his clothes denoting when he kills people nor boobs. Simple mistake.

Again, hello Rosie and Kitana!

#13 Posted by red_rover (100 posts) - - Show Bio

Wow. Very informative article. Thanks for the research.

#14 Posted by Gordo789 (218 posts) - - Show Bio

That ROSIE costume is delicious... It's only a matter of time before we see hairy dudes wearing those at conventions now.

#15 Posted by GoonFan_12 (45 posts) - - Show Bio

you know, I would give pretty much whatever to see Halloween go back to be awesome and get away from being sexy. notice how I didn't put those two together - sexy and awesome. one is for fun and for scares and for a delightful thumbing of our noses at the things that go bump in the night. the other is for drunken sorority girls. respect the Celts. long live All Hallow's Eve.

#16 Posted by MetropolisKid41 (523 posts) - - Show Bio

Rosie and Venom high five!!! Wa wa we wa!

#17 Posted by moywar700 (3013 posts) - - Show Bio

People should make their title of their threads more sexy


For example: Motorboat Virgin Harley Quinn V.S Wild Cougar Emma Frost DON'T CLICK!

#18 Posted by Billy Batson (59391 posts) - - Show Bio


#19 Posted by Doctor!!!!! (2135 posts) - - Show Bio

Spider-Woman (Julia Carpenter) does not wear a cape, and Mileena is perfect!

#20 Posted by Decept-O (7827 posts) - - Show Bio

"Poison and Motley Crue groupies can't be groupies forever, and apparently, neither can their daughters." -funny stuff right there. Yup.

However, what is wrong with 1987?

Funny stuff and agreed, what these "costumes" lack in accuracy are passable because they make whomever wears them downright slexy.

#21 Posted by PrincessSolaria (233 posts) - - Show Bio

I love the Kitana costume is just perfect. I would use.

#22 Posted by xerox_kitty (17338 posts) - - Show Bio
I came VERY close to picking this costume for myself this Halloween

Awwww... I wanted to see that! :)

There are some really weird adaptations. I think one of the hottest I saw was a Robin mini skirted all-in-one dress... but that was just the promo photo. Looking at the packet, it was clearly cheaply made & would only look right on ladies of negotiable affection ;)

#23 Posted by Wonder Princess (170 posts) - - Show Bio

I love the Phoenix costume! I need to look for that one myself. :)

#24 Posted by Xenozoic Shaman (422 posts) - - Show Bio

I guess sexy costumes just aren't my thing.  Silly or clever costumes for me, I guess.  The Rosie purse/head was clever though.

#25 Posted by RedheadedAtrocitus (6958 posts) - - Show Bio

Hot stuff, the Jean Grey suit especially. Sex sells? Well that's new to me! Hehe.

#26 Posted by cyberninja (10527 posts) - - Show Bio


#27 Posted by HexThis (1112 posts) - - Show Bio

Did you know that woman in the venom costume is Carrie Prejean? Yuuuuuuuck.

#28 Posted by CATPANEXE (9505 posts) - - Show Bio

Eh. And not at the article, your writing is stellar and entertaining as hell, but the costumes are middle ground sexy or less, imo.

#29 Posted by jordama (4701 posts) - - Show Bio

I'm kinda hoping that Babs makes a similar article.

#30 Posted by inferiorego (23321 posts) - - Show Bio

Eh. And not at the article, your writing is stellar and entertaining as hell, but the costumes are middle ground sexy or less, imo.

My taste in sexy is very refined due to the loneliness I feel in my heart. You too can have a great taste in sexy if you can be forever alone.
#31 Posted by Ferro Vida (34318 posts) - - Show Bio

I don't really like any of those (save for the Disney Princess ones up top). Hmm.

#32 Posted by astrid12 (91 posts) - - Show Bio

That Rosie costume...WOW lol

#33 Edited by fodigg (6211 posts) - - Show Bio

The Jetsons one is sexy but it's mostly just fun. Good costume. It doesn't cover much less than some business suits but it definitely gets the point across. Good pick.

#34 Posted by CATPANEXE (9505 posts) - - Show Bio


I felt more like you were intentionally holding back in your choices, either for the sake of a humorous underlay, keeping it family friendly (it's not like you could post Liz Viscious or something, I think?), or I don't know, and that's kewl. Or if catalog images and clothing not unlike the ones one would find in a Halloween costume book, a Sears book, a Target ad, ect., are what twists noodle, hey, twist away. I'll be the first to support you (and film you twisting but that goes without saying).

They are nice costumes though.

#35 Posted by .o0Johnny0o. (770 posts) - - Show Bio
Hold onto your hats, gentlemen. (nearly 3 years old now!)
#36 Posted by Maki_P (292 posts) - - Show Bio

I would've like to see the sexy I-killed-Elmo-in-ritual-combat-so-I'm-wearing-his-skin-as-a-trophy costume

#37 Posted by Renee (10398 posts) - - Show Bio

All I like is the Rosie purse lol!

#38 Posted by LittleSocrates (43 posts) - - Show Bio

Great post, personal favorite is definitely the Kitana outfit.

#39 Posted by Eyz (3187 posts) - - Show Bio

Rosie from the Jetsons!!!! Awww man! XD

EPIC RANDOMNESS over 9000s! Yup. That's how I'd sum it.

#40 Posted by AssertingValor (7047 posts) - - Show Bio

Needs more skin :/..................

#41 Posted by umbrafeline (5919 posts) - - Show Bio

how i envy to be one of those gals

#42 Posted by ComicMan24 (147494 posts) - - Show Bio

lol Rosie is a surprise.