#1 Posted by dtschemmel (504 posts) - - Show Bio

Okay guys, you know the drill. The last post was a hit so I want this one to be the same! So shoot me your ideas! I know nothing about deadpool, but would like to know how you kill a man who can regenerate.

#2 Posted by Jorgevy (5114 posts) - - Show Bio

using an eraser or doodling over him

#3 Posted by chocobojam (288 posts) - - Show Bio

Put him in a meat grinder and feed him to the dogs.

#4 Posted by dtschemmel (504 posts) - - Show Bio

But I saw something where Punisher cut him into like 8 different pieces and buried each piece across a country.

#5 Posted by FadeToBlackBolt (23238 posts) - - Show Bio

Put him in a Wolverine movie, that'll end any chance he has.

#6 Posted by akbogert (3227 posts) - - Show Bio

@FadeToBlackBolt said:

Put him in a Wolverine movie, that'll end any chance he has.

/thread

#7 Posted by dtschemmel (504 posts) - - Show Bio

@FadeToBlackBolt: Hahahahaha, I liked Origins..

#8 Posted by FadeToBlackBolt (23238 posts) - - Show Bio

@dtschemmel: Whether you did or didn't, there's no denying it didn't do DP any favours :P

#9 Posted by dtschemmel (504 posts) - - Show Bio

@FadeToBlackBolt: I hate Ryan Reynolds. :P Cant watch a movie with my gf with him in it.

#10 Posted by dtschemmel (504 posts) - - Show Bio

bump

#11 Posted by Franchise1590 (298 posts) - - Show Bio

Deadpool can't die. Death is in love with him still so he can't die permanently. His healing factor is rediculous and he's amazing dangerous if he actually takes a fight seriously, which he does if you threaten someone he cares about.

If ya bury his parts around his head will eat it's way out eventually and get help finding the other parts. Melt him and he'll regen. Freeze him he'll thaw. Throw him in space and he'll suffocate until he lands on a planet with air (which are abundant in Marvel universe apparently) then he'll be fine.

Wade's tough as shit.

#12 Posted by dtschemmel (504 posts) - - Show Bio

@Franchise1590: Didn't squirrel girl beat him?

#13 Posted by Charetter115 (475 posts) - - Show Bio

Convince TOAA to erase him from existence.

#14 Posted by Timandm (3316 posts) - - Show Bio

As far as I know, at the moment he CAN NOT DIE.
 
Death will not allow him to die.  And by "Death", I mean the very entity of Death.  She WILL NOT allow him to die.  He went through a thing where he tried a myriad of ways to die.  The most extreme was pissing off the Hulk so that the Hulk would literally smash him.  And The Hulk did exactly that.  He smashed him.   Here's a couple of scans from Deadpool Volume 3 issue 39.
 

 
 
Here you can see, the Hulk basically reduces Deadpool to paste...  literally....
 
and, some time later, he's back together.  The impression is that it took  weeks...
 
Now, PRIOR to this whole, "Death won't let him die" thing, it was understood (even by Deadpool himself) that if his head were severed from his body, and not reattached within 11 minutes, he would die...
 
So, at the moment, regardless of how creative one gets, Deadpool cannot die...
 
 
 
 
 
 
@dtschemmel said:

@Franchise1590: Didn't squirrel girl beat him?


She beat him in a fight, similar to the way she beat Wolverine in a sparring session, but she didn't kill him.
#15 Posted by SpideyIvyDaredevilFan26 (6358 posts) - - Show Bio

They could try what Ozy did to Dr Manhattan and vaporize his entire essence.

#16 Posted by dtschemmel (504 posts) - - Show Bio

So... he cant be beat?! :c

#17 Posted by Timandm (3316 posts) - - Show Bio
@dtschemmel said:

So... he cant be beat?! :c

No, he can be beat.  He's been beat a number of times.  He just can't 'die.'   he can be cut to pieces, beheaded, ground into paste, and locked in a cage that he can't get out of....  There was an X-Men's story where Wolverine and a few others went into the future about 800 years.  Deadpool was there, but he explained that he'd been trapped in a bank safe for most of those 800 years.
 
So, you see, he absolutely can be beaten, stopped, captured, and detained...  He just can't be killed.  At least, not at the moment.  But that's not because of his ability to heal, that's be cause Lady Death, herself, will not allow him to die.
#18 Posted by dtschemmel (504 posts) - - Show Bio

@Timandm: Mother of god...

#19 Posted by AustinHasten (219 posts) - - Show Bio

@FadeToBlackBolt said:

Put him in a Wolverine movie, that'll end any chance he has.

#20 Posted by Ms. Omega (4543 posts) - - Show Bio

Have him ride a nuke into the sun wearing a cowboy hat.

#21 Posted by dtschemmel (504 posts) - - Show Bio

@AustinHasten said:

@FadeToBlackBolt said:

Put him in a Wolverine movie, that'll end any chance he has.

#22 Posted by Timandm (3316 posts) - - Show Bio
@Ms. Omega said:

Have him ride a nuke into the sun wearing a cowboy hat.

Oh crap.  You DO realize Quesada, Loeb, and Liefeld read websites like this looking for ideas, don't you?  You just gave them one...  :-)
#23 Posted by comicace3 (6688 posts) - - Show Bio

@Franchise1590 said:

Deadpool can't die. Death is in love with him still so he can't die permanently. His healing factor is rediculous and he's amazing dangerous if he actually takes a fight seriously, which he does if you threaten someone he cares about.

If ya bury his parts around his head will eat it's way out eventually and get help finding the other parts. Melt him and he'll regen. Freeze him he'll thaw. Throw him in space and he'll suffocate until he lands on a planet with air (which are abundant in Marvel universe apparently) then he'll be fine.

Wade's tough as shit.

QFT

#24 Posted by sagejonathan (2033 posts) - - Show Bio

Well, this has been an enlightening thread.

#25 Posted by Big_Nasty (349 posts) - - Show Bio

Use Acme Termites on Him .

#26 Edited by JonSmith (4010 posts) - - Show Bio

First things first, there are a number of problems to killing Deadpool. His healing factor, Death's infatuation with him, Thanos's curse, all of it makes him completely unkillable. See, the whole "Death won't let him die" is inaccurate: She wants him to die just as much as Deadpool WANTS to die. As long as Deadpool lives, they can't be together. That's WHY Deadpool wants to die: So he can be with his love. Thanos cursed him with immortality to keep Wade from her, leaving the way open to Thanos. So, if we want to kill Wade, we need to get rid of the curse, then we can kill Deadpool. That bit's easy, it's the curse that's tricky. Perhaps Doctor Strange could help us. The good Doctor's hippocratic oath would generally be an obstacle to this, but I think we can convince him that Deadpool's insanity and perpetual agony as he's torn apart time and time again in search of death is no life worth living.

So Doctor Strange can perhaps aid us in alleviating the curse, provided he's at his best. Magic is so finicky we can't really explore beyond that point without further elaboration on what Thanos did. But presuming we remove the curse, getting around Deadpool's healing factor is easy.

See, during his Reign, Norman Osborn did a great deal. One of his lesser achievements? He cured cancer. Why? To kill Deadpool. See, Deadpool's cancer is constantly active, spreading at the exact same rate his healing factor is fighting it. Realizing this, Osborn put together a cure for cancer, then weaponized it. Firing this into Wade would cure his cancer. This is bad because his healing factor considers the cancer part of 'baseline' Wade, i.e., Wade had all his limbs when he got his healing factor, so said healing factor regenerates those. Hence why it can't cure his scars. However, cancer can't be regenerated because it's a disease. So take out the cancer, and the healing factor goes nuts looking for anything that COULD be cancer, trying to cure it. So any impurities in Wade's body will be hunted down, and eliminated. Again, this is bad because these are ALL part of baseline Wade. The more the healing factor looks for cancer to eliminate, the more parts of normal Wade will be destroyed, and the crazier it'll go.

Until, eventually, Wade falls apart, melts into goo, whatever, dude dies.

We inform Doctor Strange to look back through time at that incident, when Norman was designing the cure, and we should be able to replicate it, by taking it to Reed Richards. Generally, getting an appointment with the Fantastic Four is tricky, but tell them we know how to cure cancer, but lack the means to design it, and that should get their attention. We get the cure, they begin mass distributing it, we take it to Wade, tell him that we know how to kill him, and give it to him. Chances are pretty good he uses it on himself.

Death rejoices, Wade and her go on their honeymoon to the DC Universe so Death can introduce him to his new family: The Endless.

In summary: We've killed Wade Wilson AND cured cancer. I'd say that's a mission accomplished.

#27 Posted by dtschemmel (504 posts) - - Show Bio

@JonSmith: THIS GUYY

#28 Posted by redbird3rdboywonder (4523 posts) - - Show Bio

Shove a Rasenshuriken down his throat

#29 Posted by fury714 (589 posts) - - Show Bio

Deadpool can still die by drowning right? Daken got killed by drowning, although Im not sure if his healing factor is as strong as Wolverine/Deadpools. And there's always the Muramasa Blade. In one of the deadpool comics that I read with Bob, agent of hydra, wolverine cut off DP's head and bob had to reattach it within a certain time or else he would die.

#30 Posted by Bogey (970 posts) - - Show Bio

Just freeze him.

#31 Posted by Franchise1590 (298 posts) - - Show Bio

@JonSmith said:

First things first, there are a number of problems to killing Deadpool. His healing factor, Death's infatuation with him, Thanos's curse, all of it makes him completely unkillable. See, the whole "Death won't let him die" is inaccurate: She wants him to die just as much as Deadpool WANTS to die. As long as Deadpool lives, they can't be together. That's WHY Deadpool wants to die: So he can be with his love. Thanos cursed him with immortality to keep Wade from her, leaving the way open to Thanos. So, if we want to kill Wade, we need to get rid of the curse, then we can kill Deadpool. That bit's easy, it's the curse that's tricky. Perhaps Doctor Strange could help us. The good Doctor's hippocratic oath would generally be an obstacle to this, but I think we can convince him that Deadpool's insanity and perpetual agony as he's torn apart time and time again in search of death is no life worth living.

So Doctor Strange can perhaps aid us in alleviating the curse, provided he's at his best. Magic is so finicky we can't really explore beyond that point without further elaboration on what Thanos did. But presuming we remove the curse, getting around Deadpool's healing factor is easy.

See, during his Reign, Norman Osborn did a great deal. One of his lesser achievements? He cured cancer. Why? To kill Deadpool. See, Deadpool's cancer is constantly active, spreading at the exact same rate his healing factor is fighting it. Realizing this, Osborn put together a cure for cancer, then weaponized it. Firing this into Wade would cure his cancer. This is bad because his healing factor considers the cancer part of 'baseline' Wade, i.e., Wade had all his limbs when he got his healing factor, so said healing factor regenerates those. Hence why it can't cure his scars. However, cancer can't be regenerated because it's a disease. So take out the cancer, and the healing factor goes nuts looking for anything that COULD be cancer, trying to cure it. So any impurities in Wade's body will be hunted down, and eliminated. Again, this is bad because these are ALL part of baseline Wade. The more the healing factor looks for cancer to eliminate, the more parts of normal Wade will be destroyed, and the crazier it'll go.

Until, eventually, Wade falls apart, melts into goo, whatever, dude dies.

We inform Doctor Strange to look back through time at that incident, when Norman was designing the cure, and we should be able to replicate it, by taking it to Reed Richards. Generally, getting an appointment with the Fantastic Four is tricky, but tell them we know how to cure cancer, but lack the means to design it, and that should get their attention. We get the cure, they begin mass distributing it, we take it to Wade, tell him that we know how to kill him, and give it to him. Chances are pretty good he uses it on himself.

Death rejoices, Wade and her go on their honeymoon to the DC Universe so Death can introduce him to his new family: The Endless.

In summary: We've killed Wade Wilson AND cured cancer. I'd say that's a mission accomplished.

You still couldn't think of a real way to remove the curse you kinda glossed over it.

Although I would love nothing more than to see Deadpool and Death together again and finally married. That'd be an awesome comic to read their adventures as a couple because she still has duties and he'd still be Deadpool so he can't sit still forever. Be hilarious to see how they'd function as a couple having wacky cosmic adventures.

Also you forgot one thing Jon.......Thanos would be so unbelievably pissed that his love has chosen to be with another forever he might try to destroy everything out of butthurt rage lol.

#32 Posted by Kellar21 (444 posts) - - Show Bio

@JonSmith

Agreed and as a bonus,we destroy Thanos hopes :)

#33 Posted by GrandSymbiote94 (11724 posts) - - Show Bio

Drowning him. 
 
/Thread

#34 Posted by JonSmith (4010 posts) - - Show Bio

@Franchise1590 said:

You still couldn't think of a real way to remove the curse you kinda glossed over it.

Also you forgot one thing Jon.......Thanos would be so unbelievably pissed that his love has chosen to be with another forever he might try to destroy everything out of butthurt rage lol.

Well, I can't really say anything about the curse beyond 'Doctor Strange = Sorcerer Supreme > Thanos Curse'. The summary of Thanos cursing Deadpool with immortality is pretty much just him SAYING he curses Deadpool with immortality. No complicated rituals, no finger gestures, no 'by the hoary ghosts of haggoth', etc. He just says it, and it is. I can't think up a precise counter measure against magic that is displayed imprecisely.

And yeah, Thanos would be totally ticked that someone managed to get around his curse and kill Deadpool. IF he found out. I'm hoping Death would follow my suggestion for a honeymoon, and go visit her family with Deadpool rather than sticking around to tip off Thanos that she's with someone else. Because when he figures it out... it's going to be bad. Really bad. "REED GET THE ULTIMATE NULLIFIER OH GOD PLEASE NO DON'T KILL US PLEASE GOD NO NO NO NO!" bad.

#35 Posted by Deadcool (6755 posts) - - Show Bio

@dtschemmel: His life is cursed by Thanos its not just his healing factor, he CAN'T die.