#1 Posted by CHUCKY47 (254 posts) - - Show Bio

Something realy bad

#2 Posted by JediXMan (30931 posts) - - Show Bio

Define "really bad." Like criminal or something minor?

In either case, no, not really. I've never been accused of a crime, and people usually believe me if I deny something.

Moderator
#3 Edited by JulieDC (1015 posts) - - Show Bio

I am usually forced to be a scapegoat when something goes wrong since I tend to keep to myself and am not part of other people's inner circles. Its why I trust no one and assume the worst about everyone.

#4 Posted by tupiaz (2227 posts) - - Show Bio

@juliedc said:

I am usually forced to be a scapegoat when something goes wrong since I tend to keep to myself and am not part of other people's inner circles. Is why I trust no one and assume the worst about everyone.

Yeah, that attitude is certainly gonna help.

#5 Edited by JulieDC (1015 posts) - - Show Bio

@tupiaz: don't you DARE presume to know me or my life or the things I have been through. I don't owe you a **** explanation as to why I have to think this way. And at least my way of thinking has prepared me for the inevitable than your way ever would. So far YOUR method caused me far more pain and suffering. So no, I will be sticking with my way as long as it continues to serve me well. If you want to keep attacking the victim then go ahead, in the end you just prove my point about why I should expect the worst out of people and not trust them for my own good.

#6 Posted by CHUCKY47 (254 posts) - - Show Bio

@jedixman: realy bad by like getting blamed for accidently hurting someone when u didn't

#7 Edited by flazam (2499 posts) - - Show Bio

@juliedc said:

I am usually forced to be a scapegoat when something goes wrong since I tend to keep to myself and am not part of other people's inner circles. Its why I trust no one and assume the worst about everyone.

You Sound like Batman

#8 Posted by AweSam (7375 posts) - - Show Bio

@juliedc: I'm sort of the same. I try not to trust people, but I don't assume the worst. Also, you don't have to flip out on the guy...

#9 Posted by Veshark (9058 posts) - - Show Bio

Sure, plenty of times, as I'm sure everyone has. Not to the extent of it being 'really bad', but maybe for like starting a fight that I didn't start, you know, small potatoes.

@juliedc said:

@tupiaz: don't you DARE presume to know me or my life or the things I have been through. I don't owe you a **** explanation as to why I have to think this way. And at least my way of thinking has prepared me for the inevitable than your way ever would. So far YOUR method caused me far more pain and suffering. So no, I will be sticking with my way as long as it continues to serve me well. If you want to keep attacking the victim then go ahead, in the end you just prove my point about why I should expect the worst out of people and not trust them for my own good.

Whoo, chillax.

#10 Edited by JulieDC (1015 posts) - - Show Bio

@awesam: that was me holding back....

#11 Edited by JulieDC (1015 posts) - - Show Bio

@flazam: Hmm...you saying that makes me wonder if that is why I prefer the bat family over batman because like Bruce, I need light in my darkness.

#12 Posted by cameron83 (7506 posts) - - Show Bio

@juliedc said:

@tupiaz: don't you DARE presume to know me or my life or the things I have been through. I don't owe you a **** explanation as to why I have to think this way. And at least my way of thinking has prepared me for the inevitable than your way ever would. So far YOUR method caused me far more pain and suffering. So no, I will be sticking with my way as long as it continues to serve me well. If you want to keep attacking the victim then go ahead, in the end you just prove my point about why I should expect the worst out of people and not trust them for my own good.

JEESUS!!!

#13 Edited by JulieDC (1015 posts) - - Show Bio

@cameron83: @veshark: I just get sick of people talking down to me and criticizing from the outside looking in. I get enough of that as is. And most of the time I have to sit there and take it. Believe it or not, but I still held back in my comment.

#14 Posted by Bruxae (14004 posts) - - Show Bio

Yes, quite alot actually. My dad/some of my relatives were real a-holes back in the day so my surname comes with a stigma plus me being rather shy around people doesnt help.

Ive had fingers pointed at me for several major crimes (including arson) just for having been outside for a walk the same day.

#15 Posted by lilben42 (2556 posts) - - Show Bio

Nope. I'm always the guy who everyone thinks doesn't do anything. Little do they know...

#16 Posted by martyyy15 (1223 posts) - - Show Bio

@juliedc:

Hey Julie I am sorry lots of people of wronged you and hurt you. But not everyone is like that. I really do hope someday you can come to trust and see the good in people :) But your view based on what you said does make sense. I hope that you can find some very good freinds sometime who won't hurt you and will always be there for you :)

#17 Posted by joshmightbe (24937 posts) - - Show Bio

My stepsister once accused me of fondling her because I refused to split up some money my dad gave me for my birthday with her.

#18 Posted by The Stegman (25022 posts) - - Show Bio

@joshmightbe: that sounds like something that would be on a sitcom like Arrested Development or something.

#19 Posted by joshmightbe (24937 posts) - - Show Bio

@the_stegman: No my stepsister was much worse than anyone on that show, this is a chick who once accused some random dude of rape because it was April fool's day (That was literally her only reason) and then had the nerve to bitch at the cops because she had to spend a few nights in jail over it for false reporting.

#20 Posted by AweSam (7375 posts) - - Show Bio

@lilben42: I'm the guy everyone knows is up to something, so there's no need to falsely accuse me. Little do they... they're right.

#21 Posted by fodigg (6146 posts) - - Show Bio

Shouldn't this be in off-topic?

#22 Edited by tupiaz (2227 posts) - - Show Bio

@juliedc said:

@tupiaz: don't you DARE presume to know me or my life or the things I have been through. I don't owe you a **** explanation as to why I have to think this way. And at least my way of thinking has prepared me for the inevitable than your way ever would. So far YOUR method caused me far more pain and suffering. So no, I will be sticking with my way as long as it continues to serve me well. If you want to keep attacking the victim then go ahead, in the end you just prove my point about why I should expect the worst out of people and not trust them for my own good.

Reacting like that doesn't help either. I didn't presume anything what so ever about your life or your experience in life nor did I attack you. I simply said that an attitude you showed in the first post and the attitude you are showing now doesn't help. It seems like everybody is out to get to you are attack you and that is not the case. If you don't show any trust you won't get any. That doesn't mean you have to trust everybody you see or people you don't no. Quite frankly you should be happy I have here giving you a nice and quite answer because when you are getting at people like that you really don't deserve it.

#23 Posted by Petey_is_Spidey (2864 posts) - - Show Bio

Nothing really bad, but I've always been blamed for small stuff.

#24 Edited by JulieDC (1015 posts) - - Show Bio

@tupiaz: Your original comment was rude, so of course I was going to respond angrily. I don't like it when strangers think they can talk down to me and act as if they know more about my situation than me. I would rather you not respond because your criticisms are not helpful nor do I appreciate them or need them. I disagree with every single thing you said as MY experience has proven that YOUR method causes me far more problems than my method has. What works for you isn't the same for others and vice versa. Why cant you accept that? When my method stops working, I'll change it. Till that time comes, I am sticking with it.

#25 Edited by tupiaz (2227 posts) - - Show Bio

@juliedc said:

@tupiaz: Your original comment was rude, so of course I was going to respond angrily. I don't like it when strangers think they can talk down to me and act as if they know more about my situation than me. I would rather you not respond because your criticisms are not helpful nor do I appreciate them or need them. I disagree with every single thing you said as MY experience has proven that YOUR method causes me far more problems than my method has. When my method stops working, I'll change it. Till that time comes, I am sticking with it.

No my comment wasn't rude nor aggressive and I feel like you are wrongly accusing me for things I haven't done. I simply said that with an attitude like that people are like less likely to trust you. LIke several other people here things you overreacted, not everything is an attack You are the one attacking me and your are still doing so after I gave a nice and calm answer. If you take everything (or many thing) as an attack and go right up in the face on people instead making a claim answer you won't get many friendly answer. It was an advice an advice is not something thats attacks you that is something that wants to give a second opinion about things.

You are the one assuming I am an murderous raping pedophile that likes to do terror in his free time who also happens to have a dictorship over a country and enjoys genocide (that is about the worst I can think of) not me. If you meet people with that attitude of distrust you can't expect people to trusting out. The only way somebody can get your trust is if the person has a higher level of trust than you. If everybody has the same distrust as you have shown in this thread nobody would trust anybody and nobody could be friends or doing anything good. Nobody would make love and the human race would stop exist (or rather would have centuries ago. Therefore your distrust is illogical. This is not an attack but rather a philosophic critique of your values and yes there is a huge different.

Live like you will but distrust is only going to give more distrust. You have said it your self the reason why you don't trust people is because some people hasn't trusted you a accused you of things you didn't do. The only way you will meet people that trust you is if they trust you more than them.

#26 Edited by JulieDC (1015 posts) - - Show Bio

@tupiaz: Uh, I never said nor assumed you were a murderer or dictator or any of that stuff. I just feel you were being out of line because how you phrased what you said came off as rude to me ("with that attitude" just sounds mean to me) and I don't know you enough nor do you know enough about me or what I have been through and continue to go through to give me "advice". You are essentially an outsider looking in, criticizing my beliefs and telling me I am wrong to feel the way I feel. Nothing you say is a fact and again, what works best for you doesn't work best for me. When I trust people, I always end up the loser and end up paying a big price for giving people the benefit of the doubt. If my lack of trusting people begets distrust from others, it wouldn't be anything new. When I was trusting, they were still distrusting or hurting me. So I am simply preparing myself for the inevitable.

And even if I were willing to trust, I shouldn't always have to trust more than they are willing to trust me. And don't mistake my lack of distrust for not being nice to people, because I am nice to people more so than most people are towards me but when it comes to what matters, I will always trust myself before I trust others and go with the assumption that everyone has the power to destroy my life. I can't afford not to think this way anymore. Life experiences have taught me to look out for myself because no one else will.

#27 Posted by martyyy15 (1223 posts) - - Show Bio

@juliedc:

Did you see my comment to you? I want you to know that not everyone is mean, there are good people out there too :) Feel free to PM if you like, for real

#28 Edited by JulieDC (1015 posts) - - Show Bio

@martyyy15: Thanks. Its nice to know someone doesn't want to fight me on how I feel.

#29 Posted by martyyy15 (1223 posts) - - Show Bio

@juliedc:

Hey no problem. I really am sorry that people have hurt you so much in the past. I have had freinds who have had that happen to them as well :(

#30 Edited by tupiaz (2227 posts) - - Show Bio

@juliedc said:

@tupiaz: Uh, I never said nor assumed you were a murderer or dictator or any of that stuff. I just feel you were being out of line because how you phrased what you said came off as rude to me and I don't know you enough nor do you now enough about me or what I have been through and continue to go through to give me advice. You are essentially an outsider looking in. Nothing you say is a fact and again, what works best for you doesn't work best for me. When I trust people, I always end up the loser and end up paying a big price for giving people the benefit of the doubt. If my lack of trusting people begets distrust from others, it wouldn't be anything new. When I was trusting, they were still distrusting or hurting me. So I am simply preparing myself for the inevitable.

And even if I were willing to trust, I shouldn't always have to trust more than they are willing to trust me. And don't mistake my lack of distrust for not being nice to people, because I am nice to people more so than most people are towards me but when it comes to what matters, I will always trust myself before I trust others and go with the assumption that everyone has the power to destroy my life. I can't afford not to think this way anymore. Life experiences have taught me to look out for myself because no one else will.

Now I know you logical wouldn't assumed that since the chances is low. However when you assume the worst of people (therefore my analogy). I was used to prove that when you don't trust people you are not likely to get any of it back. Now I'm not saying that everybody deserves you complete trust. Trust is being build as you get closer to people.

#31 Posted by flazam (2499 posts) - - Show Bio

@juliedc: You must have had a hard time to feel that way

#32 Posted by Z3RO180 (6618 posts) - - Show Bio

I get blamed for a great many things

#33 Edited by JulieDC (1015 posts) - - Show Bio

@tupiaz: Basically, when I say I assume the worst, I pretty much mean that people have the power to ruin my life or hurt me. I don't think of them as the most evil person in the world. Just someone that has the potential to make my life a living nightmare. So I keep people at arms length and try to rely on myself as much as possible. When I trusted people, they didn't trust me, they still treated me like dirt. So trust doesn't always build close relations. For me, its just made me an easy target for people to take advantage of or to blame things on. So if people aren't going to trust me when I trust them, why bother trusting them? Its not worth the pain.

@flazam: Just a lot of bad things that have piled up overtime and outweighed any good things in my life (and unfortunately, the bad things have far more impact on my life than the good stuff). It just wears you down mentally.

#34 Edited by flazam (2499 posts) - - Show Bio
#35 Posted by warlock360 (28057 posts) - - Show Bio

Got stopped by the police for walking too weird. : / they thought i was drunk, and I have a muscle weakness lmao

try explaining that

#36 Edited by joshmightbe (24937 posts) - - Show Bio

@juliedc: My life guiding philosophy has always been Hope for the best, Expect the worst.