Wildvine Reviews: Batman vs Jaws

Note: I do not own Batman or Jaws or the pic.

Batman vs Jaws

The crossover no one wanted to see....Is the summer movie everyone will be complaining about.

I caught up with Stephen Spielberg, and Tim Burton, for a rare interview about this up and coming monstrosity.

Me: Mr Spielberg, Mr Burton, thank you for meeting me today. First question, everyone is asking, why are you making this movie?

Spielberg: Well, i know everyone was getting tired of the alien movies I keep making. Then I thought, another Jaws movie. I know the fans wanted more after 'Revenge'...

Burton: I'm trying to break into serious movies.

Me: And you thought Batman vs Jaws...?

Spielberg: he's a great character with tons of fans, and he fights Batman.

Burton: Is any movie more serious then a shark movie?

Me: In the movie poster Batman is holding a light saber. Is this a Star Wars crossover too?

Burton: (chuckles) That was just to get attention, actually Batman beats the shark to death with his knuckles.

Spielberg: Until the next movie that is...

Me: (Afraid to ask) Next movie?

Spielberg: Well, off record, we are in talks about a Rockey vs Jaws movie. (he smiles)

Burton: But in this movie, we get more of a sense of how tragic the character of the shark is. Yes, he tears people apart, but he's really tearing himself apart, because of his traumatic childhood.

Me: Okay, thank you for your time gentlemen.

Spielberg: Thank you (Shakes hand)

Burton: I got credit for 'Nightmare before Christmas' (Shakes hand)

Batman vs Jaws. Starring Jensen Ackles as Batman. Also starring...Who cares? it has Jensen Ackles.

Dedicated to my Sis, Bumpyboo.

@wildvine: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

AWESOME

Now i wanna see this movie

No way, you did it, cool! I would really love to see this.

And thank you.

^_^

@wildvine: Ha ha ha cute

LOL -- that was hilarious!

Me: And you thought Batman vs Jaws...?
Spielberg: he's a great character with tons of fans, and he fights Batman.

This just did it for me. Great freaking job!

Make the movie a fan fic.

cool

@wildvine said:

Dedicated to Bumpyboo.

Really. I don't even get a sidenote. Goddamit wildvine I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS!!!

@CapFanboy said:

@wildvine said:

Dedicated to Bumpyboo.

Really. I don't even get a sidenote. Goddamit wildvine I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS!!!

Aww, Cap, she got dedication cause i wrote it for her. You get next dedication, if the story is worthy...

@wildvine said:

@CapFanboy said:

@wildvine said:

Dedicated to Bumpyboo.

Really. I don't even get a sidenote. Goddamit wildvine I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS!!!

Aww, Cap, she got dedication cause i wrote it for her. You get next dedication, if the story is worthy...

Bu--Bu--But Gah! an-- and-- *cries*

No one has caught the 'Nightmare before Christmas' joke yet...

@CapFanboy Actually i was going to write you in a future story anyway...

@wildvine said:

@CapFanboy Actually i was going to write you in a future story anyway...

:'D YAY! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!

Also, today marks the debut of Cappie's Confessions. It will be grotesque. It will be pointless. It will be the best thing you read in your entire life.

@CapFanboy Can't wait.

@wildvine said:

@CapFanboy Can't wait.

It's up...and terrible.

Next week i interview Jensen Ackles about starring in Batman vs Jaws. Fair warning.

@wildvine said:

Next week i interview Jensen Ackles about starring in Batman vs Jaws. Fair warning.

Remember, it's still a kids site.

@CapFanboy said:

@wildvine said:

Next week i interview Jensen Ackles about starring in Batman vs Jaws. Fair warning.

Remember, it's still a kids site.

My good captain, whatever could you mean? (Bats eyelashes)

@wildvine said:

@CapFanboy said:

@wildvine said:

Next week i interview Jensen Ackles about starring in Batman vs Jaws. Fair warning.

Remember, it's still a kids site.

My good captain, whatever could you mean? (Bats eyelashes)

Well, Spidey in a pink tutu is fine. He's fictional. But Jensen Ackle-- *imagines Jensen in a tutu.* No! See what you've started!!

@CapFanboy I love Jensen, so it will be tasteful i assure you.

I can see Jared Padalecki in a tutu though...

@wildvine said:

@CapFanboy I love Jensen, so it will be tasteful i assure you.

I can see Jared Padalecki in a tutu though...

Why. Why do you do these things?

@CapFanboy Yeah, that's in there now...

@wildvine said:

@CapFanboy Yeah, that's in there now...

It was always in there...

@wildvine: This is great! :D

Badass, what else can be said?! MAKE IT HAPPEN SPIELBERG!!!

Tim Burton produced Nightmare Before Christmas, his name's on the poster and it was his idea and story. He couldn't direct it due to Batman Returns and also Disney owned the film rights to his idea, even back in the 90's Disney owned everything!

@4donkeyjohnson said:

Tim Burton produced Nightmare Before Christmas, his name's on the poster and it was his idea and story. He couldn't direct it due to Batman Returns and also Disney owned the film rights to his idea, even back in the 90's Disney owned everything!

Yes but a lot of people think he directed it, and that was the joke.

Um... why does Batman have a lightsaber in the pic?

@GR2Blackout said:

Um... why does Batman have a lightsaber in the pic?

IDK, but i did offer a weak explanation in the "story".

Batman has a lightsaber, a DeLorean, a Green Lantern ring, shark repellant, a tricorder and a spaceship, all hidden in corners of the Batcave whenever he needs them. Fighting Jaws required a lightsaber :)

@wildvine: Pure genius !

Good job.

@mrdecepticonleader said:

@wildvine: Pure genius !

Good job.

Thank you.

@batkevin74 said:

@wildvine: Bump to beat the spam! :)

thank you sir.

Giving this a....

@wildvine: I want that outside my bedroom O_O

Year and a half anniversary bump.

That long already?? Still so funny ^_^

@bumpyboo:

Well, its dated compared to my current ability. But holds up pretty well.

@wildvine: I don't know what pleases me more about that statement, the truth of how much your writing has improved, or the indication that your confidence as a writer has grown along with it :) x

@wildvine: Hehe. This is so cool. :)

@dboyrules2011:

*squeal!!* Thank you. <3

@wildvine: You're welcome! =D

When are you gonna make another review? =O

@dboyrules2011:

A real review? I was gonna review Cap America 2.

@wildvine: Aw yeah! I can't wait! 8D

How did I never see this?! This is friggin' hilarious. XD

Soooper cute !

@darling_luna:

You should skim my library. I have lots of stuff you probably haven't seen.

I'm sorry- I just couldn't resist. And honestly, I'm surprised that no one thought of this sooner. Especially @capfanboy or @bumpyboo. :)