Posted by InnerVenom123 (29499 posts) - - Show Bio

Marc Spector, Moon Knight, became a supervillain. He was responsible for an uncounted number of deaths; men, women, and children alike. Khonshu, dark God of vengeance and the Moon, was in control. Khonshu had risen to power as an Omega-God. Marlene Alraune, Marc's ex-wife, was held prisoner for six months, during which Marc tortured her, cutting up her skin until she was fully scarred. In the end, screwing with the Ghost Riders proved to be Khonshu's downfall. Marlene killed Marc, and Marlene killed Khonshu. She was healed by the spirit of vengeance, and she remarried. It wasn't enough.

This is the end of their story.

Happy Valentine's Day.

Rated M

Page 1

1.1

Marlene Alraune laying down in a hospital bed, dressed in a hospital gown, blankets pulled over her up to her shoulders.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 1, 2013.

SUB-CAPTION: 3:00 PM.

1.2

Marlene’s eyes start to open.

MARLENE: Nhh

JACK: Marlene!

1.3

Jack Spencer, Marlene’s fiancé, is at her bedside, leaning over from the chair he was sitting on. Marlene is becoming fully conscious.

MARLENE: What… what happened?

JACK: Marlene, you had a seizure.

JACK: I… I should call the nurse, just a second, let me-

MARLENE: No.

1.4

Marlene looks at Jack.

MARLENE: I need to talk to you for a second, so just don’t.

JACK: Marlene, they should look you over…

MARLENE: They can later.

MARLENE: How long was I out?

JACK: It’s tomorrow. Here, let me just—

1.5

Marlene’s frustrated.

MARLENE: Did I say anything? Was I doing anything weird?

JACK: Aside from--

MARLENE: Yes, aside from having a damn seizure, Jack!

JACK: No.

1.6

Jack stands up, looking toward the door.

JACK: Look, I’m going to get the nurse now.

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: Dammit.

Page 2

2.1

Jack walks away, Marlene is angry and looking at herself.

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: I wanted to get away from this.

2.2

Close up on Marlene.

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: There has to be some way to…

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: …

2.3

Marlene looks up, Jack’s brought in a doctor.

DOCTOR: Here she is.

JACK: So, what happened?

2.4

Jack sits at Marlene’s bedside as the doctor explains.

DOCTOR: We… aren’t quite sure, actually.

DOCTOR: I’ll need to run more tests.

DOCTOR: An extended stay in the hospital will be necessary.

JACK: Oh.

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: Dammit.

DOCTOR: That’s really all I can say, I’m afraid. I’ve got a few more patients to visit at the moment, but I’ll be back.

2.5

The doctor nods his head toward the two of them.

DOCTOR: Excuse me.

JACK: Sure.

MARLENE: Mhm.

2.6

The doctor exits. Jack looks at Marlene.

MARLENE: What a load of crap.

JACK: Well… they didn’t find anything, I guess. So that’s good. It was probably just a freak incident.

MARLENE: Sigh.

JACK: I’m just saying.

MARLENE: I know.

Page 3

3.1

Jack looks at Marlene.

MARLENE: Babe, can you do me a favor?

JACK: Anything!

3.2

Jack looks sullen.

MARLENE: Can you just go to work or something?

MARLENE: I need some alone time.

JACK: Oh.

MARLENE: This’s all so…

JACK: I get it.

3.3

Jack stands up.

JACK: Call if you need me, okay?

MARLENE: Okay.

3.4

Jack walking toward the door.

JACK: Love you.

MARLENE: Love you too.

Page 4

4.1

Marlene, alone in the room.

CAPTION: 5:00 PM.

4.2

Marlene sits back, her eyes shut.

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: … Look…

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: I need help. We don’t… talk, but…

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: There’s… another god… and he…it… wants to kill me.

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: That’s about the size of it. Please… I need…I…

4.3

Marlene with her head in her hands, frustrated.

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: Dammit.

4.4

Marlene looks toward her hospital room door.

SFX: NOK NOK NOK

MARLENE: Um… hello?

4.5

Sara, Egyptian woman, mid 20s, opens the door, box in her other hand.

SARA: Hello?

Page 5

5.1

Marlene looks at Sara, surprised.

MARLENE: Sara?

MARLENE: Oh, no, Sara. I left you standing there, didn’t I? I had forgotten. I--

SARA: Shh.

SARA: It was I who left you.

SARA: May I sit at your bedside?

MARLENE: Of course.

5.2

Sara sits at Marlene’s bedside. She has the box on her lap.

SARA: Marlene, when I offered you help that day, I assumed that Khonshu had already started haunting you.

MARLENE: What?! You know about--

SARA: Marlene. I am your salvation.

5.3

Marlene is unnerved by Sara, reaching for the nurse’s call button.

SARA: Wait, wait. Listen.

SARA: I am not another nightmare.

MARLENE: Oh yeah?!

SARA: As I said. I am your salvation.

SARA: The contents of this box will kill Khonshu.

5.4

Marlene looks at the box.

MARLENE: I… I should call the nurse, call security but…

5.5

Sara’s eyes.

SARA: You believe me.

Page 6

6.1

Marlene looking at Sara.

MARLENE: Why didn’t you show up when I was dealing with him the first time?

SARA: I had to wait until he had placed the curse.

MARLENE: Curse? What curse?

6.2

Sara.

SARA: The curse that will force you to journey to the exhibit once again, come Valentine’s morning.

SARA: There, you will grab the TALON OF KHONSHU, the dagger on display.

SARA: This dagger is no ordinary weapon. It was crafted with the blood, sweat, and tears of thousands of devoted followers.

SARA: It is called a GOD-KEY.

SARA: A device that can restore a God’s power. Only the clever Gods use them.

6.3

Sara looks down at the box.

SARA: That’s why I have this.

SARA: My God-key.

SARA: It restored me when this poor woman touched it.

6.4

Marlene looks at Sara.

MARLENE: This… this isn’t you…

SARA: Correct. This is the body of an unsuccessful thief.

SARA: I am Bastet. Goddess of War, and the Moon.

SARA: I no longer care about bloodshed, or survival. I am damned, and rightfully so.

SARA: All I want is Khonshu.

MARLENE: … And your God-key can kill him?

Page 7

7.1

Sara.

SARA: My God-key, the CLAW OF BASTET, will separate Khonshu from his avatar. It will sever the connection of their souls… alone, barely clinging to life, Khonshu will wither and die.

SARA: This is the only way you will free yourself from him.

7.2

Marlene.

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: His avatar…

7.3

The box.

SARA: If you touch this, the body of Sara will die, and I will transfer into you.

SARA: I will grow stronger and stronger, with your assistance.

SARA: And when the cursed morning comes, we will kill Khonshu. I will separate from you, and I will drag him down to the underworld myself.

SARA: The Talon of Khonshu will melt and fizzle. All worldly remains of Khonshu will cease.

SARA: And that will be the end of it.

7.4

Marlene looking at the box.

MARLENE: How do I…

SARA: You pray.

SARA: You form a mantra, and you pray until it hurts to think.

SARA: You must do this for days and days. It is why I tried to show myself as early as possible.

SARA: Unfortunately, I am not nearly as effective at this as Thoth was. He tried to teach me… but he traveled time as if he was a boat that sailed, while I am more like a pebble skipped across the water.

SARA: So this is it. Now or never.

7.5

The box.

SARA: Do you want to kill Khonshu?

SARA: Do you want to live?

7.6

Marlene.

MARLENE: Yes.

Page 8

8.1

Sara hands Marlene the box.

SARA: Good luck, Alraune.

8.2

Marlene grabs the box.

8.3

Marlene gasps, holding the box. Sara’s body evaporates into a fine blue mist.

8.4

Marlene opens the box.

8.5

A lone dagger rests inside. The Claw of Bastet.

Page 9

9.1

Marlene stands in a public restroom at the museum, washing her face, visible in the bathroom mirror.

CAPTION: JANUARY 20, 2013.

MARLENE: Alright. Alright.

MARLENE: Just an exhibit.

MARLENE: Breathe.

9.2

Marlene looks at herself in the mirror. She’s determined.

MARLENE: ‘Atta girl.

9.3

Marlene walking out from the bathroom, toward a hallway.

9.4

Sara looks at Marlene from behind. She carries a box at her side, the size of a small gift bag.

SARA: Excuse me, Miss Alraune?

9.5

Marlene turns her head.

MARLENE: Yes?

Page 10

10.1

Sara offers her handshake to a confused Marlene.

SARA: My name is Sara. I’m here to help.

MARLENE: Help? With what?

SARA: Oh. I… I’m sorry.

SARA: My mistake.

10.2

Sara looks disappointed.

SARA: I’m early.

SARA: Please, go on.

MARLENE: Now, hold on. I may be about to work, but…

10.3

Marlene tries to be friendly.

MARLENE: How’s about you meet me here in an hour, and we can walk to my office?

10.4

Sara smiles.

SARA: Of course.

10.5

Sara walks away, Marlene gives a half-wave.

SARA: Good luck!

MARLENE: Thanks!

10.6

Close up on Sara as she walks away.

SARA: SMALL TEXT: A few days early.

SARA: SMALL TEXT: Damn.

Page 11

11.1

Marlene standing in front of a pedestal with an open chest on top. She’s looking at the contents. We don’t see them.

LITTLE SUSAN: Scuse me?

11.2

Marlene looks down to her side. A little girl is tugging at her pants.

LITTLE SUSAN: Can I see the treasure?

MARLENE: What’s your name?

LITTLE SUSAN: Susie. Can I?

MARLENE: Where’s your mom, Susie?

LITTLE SUSAN: Dinosaurs. With Tommy.

MARLENE: Well… alright.

11.3

Marlene holding up Susie, Susie looking down at the contents of the chest. They are still unknown to us.

LITTLE SUSAN: Wowww.

MARLENE: You know, Susie, this little thing is all lonely?

LITTLE SUSAN: Why?

MARLENE: It’s part of a set. There was a robbery.

11.4

Marlene happily talking to Susie.

MARLENE: Someone broke into the tomb and took the other dagger, you know.

MARLENE: I think ghosts took it. Maybe pirates. What do you think?

LITTLE SUSAN: Hmmm…

MARLENE: Well?

Page 12

12.1

Susie.

LITTLE SUSAN: I think my ex-wife took it. You remember her, don’t you? The pretty bird lady.

LITTLE SUSAN: I think she just took it to mock me.

12.2

Marlene is surprised.

MARLENE: Wh-what?

12.3

Susie. A bloodied beak is protruding from her eye socket.

LITTLE KHONSHU: You heard me.

12.4

Back shot of “Susie.” Marlene is still holding her up, in complete shock, mouth gaping open.

LITTLE KHONSHU: Hey.

LITTLE KHONSHU: Remember how you cut off my head?

12.5

Marlene is suddenly in the museum bathroom again. She’s looking at herself in the mirror, screaming.

Page 13

13.1

Marlene takes a moment to look around at the bathroom. She’s tearing up and trying not to, while shaking, on top of that.

13.2

Marlene looks at herself in the mirror.

13.3

Marlene washes her face.

13.4

Marlene, trying to be calm, walks out of the bathroom.

Page 14

14.1

Marlene at her bedside, kneeling down on both knees in front of the dagger on her bed.

CAPTION: 6:30 PM.

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: Well… here goes.

MARLENE: Please… uh.

MARLENE: Please, dagger… claw…

14.2

Close up on Marlene, she’s focusing.

MARLENE: Bastet.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet… keep me safe.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep my fiancé… Jack, keep him safe.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

14.3

Marlene’s praying. There’s a set of blue eyes opening up behind her.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

14.4

Close up. Bastet’s eyes.

MARLENE: Please…

Page 15

15.1

Ravencroft Asylum. Nurse Chons stands opposite Doctor Rivera. Chons is a 20s-something woman of middle eastern descent, Rivera is an older, Hispanic man. Rivera is reading to Chons off a clipboard, Chons is listening. They stand just down the hall from a single door.

CAPTION: JANUARY 1, 2013.

SUB-CAPTION: RAVENCROFT ASLYUM.

RIVERA: Patient’s name is Marc Spector. I’ll spare you the details and get right to the point.

RIVERA: You have to be.

RIVERA: EXTREMELY.

RIVERA: Careful.

RIVERA: Do you understand me, Nurse Chons?

15.2

Close up. Nurse Chons smiles, completely innocent.

NURSE CHONS: Of course.

15.3

Marc Spector’s padded cell. He sits alone in the corner, facing the wall. He’s in a straightjacket, white pants; his hair is long and messy.

MARC: They found me in a river.

MARC: There was blood in my eyes.

MARC: My skin was burned.

MARC: My bones were broken.

MARC: All I could see was red.

15.4

Marc turns his head toward the door.

MARC: Do you understand my pain?

15.5

Nurse Chons stands at the doorway, holding a syringe and a paper cup.

MARC: It hurts to see red.

MARC: This is a red room.

MARC: You’re in a red dress.

MARC: Do you understand my pain?

NURSE CHONS: Oh, my darling.

15.6

Nurse Chons’s jaw is unhinged. Khonshu’s beak is protruding from her mouth, soaked in blood.

NURSE CHONS: Of course I understand.

MARC: Really?

Page 16

16.1 Splash Page

Khonshu stands before Marc. He is in dark rags. He’s lost enough weight to appear sickly. He’s not covered in blood, and the “Nurse Chons” disguise/carcass is nowhere to be seen. Marc is in awe, fully turned around in his sitting position and admiring Khonshu.

MARC: Oh, miss…

MARC: I love you.

KHONSHU: And I love you, too.

Page 17

17.1

Khonshu on one knee in front of Marc.

KHONSHU: My love is special.

KHONSHU: For I understand your pain.

MARC: You do?

17.2

Khonshu’s eyes.

KHONSHU: Oh, all too well.

KHONSHU: That’s why I’m going to make it all better.

KHONSHU: For I am the LORD, YOUR GOD.

17.3

Marc’s smiling.

MARC: They told me about God…the others here, the psychos… I didn’t think they were telling the truth!

KHONSHU: Poor little things. I wish I could save them all.

KHONSHU: But I love you the most.

17.4

Khonshu’s open palm, held out in front of Marc.

KHONSHU: It hurts to try to remember, doesn’t it?

KHONSHU: Memories… they just don’t work.

KHONSHU: Do they?

MARC: No, God!

17.5

Pull back. The two of them, Marc sitting, Khonshu knelt down. Khonshu smiling, Marc in awe. A solitary crescent dart floats in Khonshu’s open palm. The crescent dart is rusted and worn.

MARC: It…

KHONSHU: I am God.

KHONSHU: This is my temple.

KHONSHU: You are my priest. My warrior. My son. Myself.

KHONSHU: This is the order of things.

MARC: It’s not red.

17.6

The crescent dart.

KHONSHU: That’s right.

KHONSHU: And I will bring you all of the colors. I will save you.

KHONSHU: But first…pray.

KHONSHU: Take this sacred temple, this crescent dart, and pray. Ask it dearly, “Let the red end”, and it will end.

17.7

Marc grabs the crescent dart delicately.

MARC: Let… the red… end?

KHONSHU: That’s my boy.

KHONSHU: Do this, and you will become my beating heart. The source of my power.

KHONSHU: I am LOVE.

KHONSHU: And your GOD.

Page 18

18.1

Marc on his knees, holding his hands up, holding the crescent dart above him. He’s somehow broken through the straightjacket. He’s overjoyed.

MARC: Let the red end! Let the red end! Let the red end!

18.2

Khonshu stands in front of the doorway, a finger raised over his beak.

KHONSHU: Shhh.

MARC: Oh.

KHONSHU: Keep quiet. And pray. Pray and never stop.

KHONSHU: Never worry about hiding it. For those without faith cannot see.

18.3

Khonshu is now Nurse Chons again, turned toward the door.

NURSE CHONS: But they will see. I will force their eyes open.

NURSE CHONS: Soon enough.

MARC: Yes, GOD.

NURSE CHONS: Remember. Let the red end.

18.4

Nurse Chons walks out from the hall, toward an unsuspecting Doctor Rivera.

MARC: SMALL TEXT: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

Page 19

19.1

Marlene stands on the outdoor patio of her apartment, her sliding door left open. She has a good view of the city. It’s a cloudy day, dark enough looking that it seems like rain is only a matter of time.

CAPTION: JANUARY 23, 2013.

19.2

Marlene looks up, eyes shut.

MARLENE: Just a nightmare.

MARLENE: All it was.

19.3

Close up on Marlene’s forehead. A drop of blood splats onto her skin.

KHONSHU: Look at you.

19.4

Marlene opens her eyes. More drips of blood splatter.

KHONSHU: A new man, a new apartment, a new life… all without me.

KHONSHU: Pity.

19.5

Marlene looks with horror at the sky. It’s raining blood.

KHONSHU: You could have been the Moon Queen.

Page 20

20.1

Marlene looks toward the door to her apartment, but it’s gone. She’s facing a brick wall. And the rain is getting heavier.

KHONSHU: Can you believe that some people still think the rain is God’s tears?

MARLENE: I… nnno…

20.2

Marlene covering her ears and concentrating, shutting her eyes and repeating a mantra. The rain is getting worse.

MARLENE: This isn’t real this isn’t real isn’t real.

KHONSHU: I’m not a nightmare, Marlene.

20.3

Khonshu stands behind Marlene in the pouring blood rain. His beak is on her shoulder, as he whispers into her ear.

KHONSHU: I’m a reality.

MARLENE: No no no no non

MARLENE: no on

MARLENE: ono.

20.4

Close up on Khonshu whispering.

KHONSHU: I’ve got something for you.

JACK: Marlene? Are you okay?

20.5

Khonshu looking up.

KHONSHU: Lookit that. Marc’s replacement.

KHONSHU: What timing.

Page 21

21.1

Marlene stands alone on the patio, leaning on the railing. Her nose is bleeding bad. It’s staining all the way down to her shirt.

JACK: Marlene?

21.2

Marlene turns to face Jack.

MARLENE: Snff

MARLENE: Jack…

JACK: Omigod.

21.3

Jack escorts Marlene inside.

JACK: Let’s get you some paper towels, and… and, damn, anything else wrong or?

MARLENE: Snff

MARLENE: No, just… just the blood.

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: the blood.

21.4

The patio, empty.

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: too much blood.

Page 22 and 23

22.1-23.1 Double Splash Page

22.1

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands. This panel starts an array of panels, 9 per page. Reading the number of panels across will lead the reader to count 6-6-6.

CAPTION: JANUARY 2, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

22.2

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 3rd, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

22.3

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 4th, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

22.4

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his on knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 5, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

22.5

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 6, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

22.6

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 7, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

22.7

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 8, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

22.8

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 9, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

22.9

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 10, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

22.10

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 11, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

Page 23

23.1

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 12, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

23.2

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 13, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

23.3

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 14, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

23.4

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 15, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

23.5

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 16, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

23.6

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 17, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

23.7

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 18, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

23.8

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: JANUARY 19, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

23.9

Khonshu. This panel is underneath the array of panels, positioned so that Khonshu is looking up at the array of panels, satisfied with his work.

KHONSHU: A curse.

KHONSHU: Yes.

KHONSHU: That will do.

Page 24

24.1

Marlene and Jack in her hospital room, talking to the doctor.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 2, 2013.

DOCTOR: Well, there’s nothing wrong with you, Miss Alraune.

DOCTOR: You can go on home now. But please, take care of yourself.

MARLENE: Will do. And thank you.

24.2

Jack wheels Marlene out of the hospital’s front doors.

24.3

Marlene and Jack driving home.

24.4

Marlene and Jack entering their apartment.

CAPTION: 4:00 PM.

MARLENE: Home, sweet home.

24.5

Marlene sets her purse down on a counter.

24.6

Marlene’s apartment, night. Marlene looks at her purse.

CAPTION: 1:30 AM.

Page 25

25.1

Marlene on her knees, the dagger in front of her on her coffee table. The eyes of Bastet watch her from behind.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

25.2

Marlene on her knees, the dagger in front of her on her coffee table. The eyes of Bastet watch her from behind.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 3, 2013.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

25.3

Marlene on her knees, the dagger in front of her on her coffee table. The eyes of Bastet watch her from behind.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 4, 2013.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

25.4

Marlene on her knees, the dagger in front of her on her coffee table. The eyes of Bastet watch her from behind.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 5, 2013.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

25.5

Marlene on her knees, the dagger in front of her on her coffee table. The eyes of Bastet watch her from behind.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 6, 2013.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

25.6

Marlene on her knees, the dagger in front of her on her coffee table. The eyes of Bastet watch her from behind.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 7, 2013.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

25.7

Marlene on her knees, the dagger in front of her on her coffee table. The eyes of Bastet watch her from behind.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 8, 2013.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

25.8

Marlene on her knees, the dagger in front of her on her coffee table. The eyes of Bastet watch her from behind.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 9, 2013.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

25.9

Marlene on her knees, the dagger in front of her on her coffee table. The eyes of Bastet watch her from behind.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 10, 2013.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

25.10

Marlene on her knees, the dagger in front of her on her coffee table. The eyes of Bastet watch her from behind.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 11, 2013.

MARLENE: Please, Bastet, keep us safe.

Page 26

26.1

Marlene and Jack sitting opposite each other at a candlelit dinner in their apartment. Marlene is laughing at something Jack said off panel.

CAPTION: JANUARY 31, 2013.

SUB-CAPTION: 11:17 PM.

MARLENE: Haha!

MARLENE: You’re so corny!

JACK: I mean it!

26.2

Marlene looks surprised.

JACK: SMALL TEXT: They really are just like…

26.3

From Marlene’s point of view. Jack isn’t there anymore, Moon Knight is.

MOON KNIGHT: Why are you doing this to yourself?

MOON KNIGHT: We both know what I said was true.

26.4

Marlene looks down.

JACK: Marlene?

MARLENE: Hm.

JACK: You okay?

MARLENE: Sorry. You were just reminding me of someone.

JACK: Oh. Who?

MARLENE: An old friend. I… I lost him.

JACK: SMALL TEXT: Oh.

26.5

Marlene standing up.

MARLENE: Excuse me for a second.

JACK: You alright?

MARLENE: Yeah. Just give me a second.

26.6

Marlene walks past Jack. Jack is Moon Knight.

MOON KNIGHT: You’re pathetic.

MOON KNIGHT: You know that?

Page 27

27.1

Marlene walks down a small hallway, toward a door at the end. Moon Knight follows her.

MOON KNIGHT: You can’t avoid me.

27.2

Marlene opens the door, it leads into a bathroom.

MOON KNIGHT: You killed me, honey.

MOON KNIGHT: Remember?

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: Shut up.

MOON KNIGHT: I deserved it, right?

27.3

Marlene shuts the door, Moon Knight outside, locks it.

MOON KNIGHT: But that excuse only worked in your head for so long. After all… I was mad.

MOON KNIGHT: Then, an epiphany!

MOON KNIGHT: I WAS mad! A mad dog! Desperate to die!

27.4

Marlene looks at herself in the mirror, gripping the countertop tight.

MOON KNIGHT: I was sick, you thought. You put me down. You saved me.

MOON KNIGHT: Proved yourself the hero.

27.5

Close up on the faucet. Water running. Marlene’s hand underneath, gathering water.

MOON KNIGHT: Guess what?

27.6

Marlene washing her face.

MOON KNIGHT: It doesn’t matter.

MOON KNIGHT: We’re both murderers.

MOON KNIGHT: In the end, that’s all we are.

Page 28

28.1

Marlene looking in the mirror. Moon Knight is at her side, hand around her shoulder.

MOON KNIGHT: And that’s why we’re perfect for each other.

28.2

Marlene slaps Moon Knight’s arm off of her.

MARLENE: OFF ME!

MOON KNIGHT: Oh, don’t shout.

28.3

Jack looks over from the table, starting to stand.

JACK: Marlene?

28.4

Marlene looks at the door.

MOON KNIGHT: You might worry your lover.

MARLENE: SMALL TEXT: Dammit.

28.5

Jack stands outside the door.

JACK: Are you okay?

28.6

Marlene glaring at Moon Knight.

MARLENE: I’m fine, Jack! Go back to the table!

JACK: No!

Page 29

29.1

Marlene looking at the door.

MARLENE: What?

29.2

Khonshu’s beak rips through the door, like an axe.

JACK-KHONSHU: NO!

29.3

Marlene steps back, into Moon Knight’s arms.

MARLENE: AAH!

MOON KNIGHT: Don’t worry, my love.

MOON KNIGHT: I’ve got you.

29.4

Jack stands at the doorway. Jack with Khonshu’s head instead of his own.

JACK-KHONSHU: What’s this?

29.5

Jack-Khonshu looking at the hallucination of Moon Knight standing behind Marlene. Moon Knight is holding on tight to Marlene’s arms.

JACK-KHONSHU: You have these walking nightmares about HIM?

JACK-KHONSHU: Am I merely a second terror?

JACK-KHONSHU: How rude.

MARLENE: L-LET GO!

MOON KNIGHT: Never, darling.

MOON KNIGHT: It’s time you got what you deserved.

29.6

Jack-Khonshu approaches Marlene. Jack’s body is naked, and the flesh is starting to rot. Khonshu’s head remains intact.

JACK-KHONSHU: Yes, darling.

JACK-KHONSHU: I have something for you.

JACK-KHONSHU: And I’ve been saving energy… just waiting for the perfect time to give it to you.

Page 30

30.1

Marlene struggles in Moon Knight’s grip.

MARLENE: STAY AWAY! GET OUT! GET OUT!

30.2

Front shot of Jack-Khonshu. Jack’s body no longer has skin. And the muscular tissue is starting to melt, revealing bone.

MARLENE: GET OUT OF MY LIFE! GET OUT! GET OUT!

JACK-KHONSHU: My, my.

30.3

Jack-Khonshu holds up a rotting hand. Floating on the palm of his hand is an orb, composed of shadows.

JACK-KHONSHU: Someone’s getting hysterical.

30.4

Khonshu’s eyes.

JACK-KHONSHU: Say “Aaaah.”

30.5

Marlene lies on the floor of the hallway, shaking violently, foaming at the mouth. Jack is at her side, his cell phone out.

JACK: YES, I NEED AN AMBULANCE RIGHT NOW!

JACK: FOR GOD’S SAKE, HURRY UP!!!

Page 31

31.1

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 12, 2013.

MARC: Let the red end… let the red end… let the red end…

KHONSHU: And soon, it shall.

31.2

Marc looks up, a smile on his face.

MARC: God!

MARC: It’s been… so long!

31.3

Khonshu stands over Marc.

KHONSHU: I know.

KHONSHU: I’ve had to drain such energy, delivering my message of love.

KHONSHU: Your prayers keep me alive, you know.

KHONSHU: You are my beating heart.

31.4

Marc bows his head.

MARC: It’s an honor.

KHONSHU: And soon, you will know the glory.

MARC: Hm?

31.5

Marc looks up, Khonshu is staring him in the face, knelt down to be level with him.

KHONSHU: Soon, WE will be God.

MARC: We?

KHONSHU: To give you as much power as I can, I must BECOME you. More than I am now.

31.6

Khonshu’s eyes.

KHONSHU: Prepare.

KHONSHU: Soon, WE will be God.

KHONSHU: More than the nameless vessel.

KHONSHU: More than God Vengeance.

KHONSHU: We will be the Moon King.

Page 32

32.1

Moon Knight stands at a pedestal on the steps of city hall. A massive mob of press surrounds the area.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 15, 2013.

SUB-CAPTION: 2:00 PM.

MOON KNIGHT: Last year, Moon Knight purchased a charter flight to Egypt.

MOON KNIGHT: He used MARC SPECTOR’S credit to do it.

MOON KNIGHT: Speculation has run rampant.

MOON KNIGHT: Am I Marc Spector?

32.2

Side shot. Moon Knight.

MOON KNIGHT: Last year, a series of murders and kidnappings terrorized the entire country.

MOON KNIGHT: Moon Knight ran an army of thugs and killers.

MOON KNIGHT: Moon Knight stole children.

MOON KNIGHT: Am I the villain?

32.3

Moon Knight raising his hands up. He’s handcuffed.

MOON KNIGHT: It’s all true.

MOON KNIGHT: Do you hear me? Am I clear?

32.4

Two police officers approach Moon Knight from opposite sides. Moon Knight hasn’t changed his stance.

MOON KNIGHT: I am Marc Spector!

MOON KNIGHT: I AM YOUR VILLAIN!

32.5

The two officers escort Moon Knight down the steps, through the crowd.

MOON KNIGHT: And I’m turning myself in.

Page 33

33.1

Marc in his cell at Ravencroft. He is on his knees, holding the crescent dart like a precious item in front of him with both hands.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 13, 2013.

SUB-CAPTION: 11:00 PM.

MARC: Let the red end. Let the red end. Let the red end.

KHONSHU: And so… it shall end.

33.2

Marc looks up, smiling.

MARC: WE ARE GOD?

33.3

Khonshu stands in front of Marc.

KHONSHU: Rise. Leave my temple on the floor.

33.4

Marc stands up, crescent dart left on the floor.

MARC: Are… we?

KHONSHU: Two paces right.

33.5

Overhead view. Marc and Khonshu are standing across from each other, and the crescent dart is on the floor. Connecting the dots of their forms, a crescent shape is made.

KHONSHU: And now…

Page 34

34.1

A glowing crescent shape forms, connecting the standing figures of Khonshu, Marc, and the crescent dart.

34.2

Marc looks at the bright light, screaming. His eyes glow red.

MARC: WE

34.3

Khonshu looks at Marc, screaming.

KHONSHU: ARE

34.4

White panel.

MARC AND KHONSHU: GOD!

34.5

Marc stands at the foot of the crescent dart. He is wearing the dark rags that Khonshu wore. Except now, they form a costume similar to Moon Knight’s old uniform, except dark and ragged. His eyes glow red.

MOON KING: I live. As two.

Page 35

35.1

Moon King holds the crescent dart to his face, inspecting it. It’s turned the color red.

MOON KING: Red Moon.

35.2

Moon King stabs himself with the crescent dart in the chest.

MOON KING: Always.

35.3

Moon King continues the cut, dragging out a bloodied crescent symbol into his chest.

MOON KING: And forever.

35.4

Moon King approaches his cell door.

MOON KING: Now then…

Page 36

36.1

The hallway outside of his cell. His door flies off the hinges from a kick.

SFX: WHAM

MOON KING: I must find my queen.

36.2

Two security guards stand, guns out and at the ready, aiming at Moon King as he walks down the hall toward them.

GUARD 1: REPEAT! PATIENT IS ARMED AND DANGEROUS!

GUARD 2: HE’S POWERED! TELL THEM HE’S--

MOON KING: Get out of my way.

36.3

Guard 2’s throat is split open by the crescent dart.

GUARD 2: GHH

36.4

Guard 1 looks at Guard 2’s body, and fires a shot in anger.

GUARD 1: RANDALL!!!

Page 37

37.1

Moon King ducks under the bullet, running toward Guard 1.

GUARD 1: YOU MONSTER! YOU--

37.2

Moon King grabs Guard 1 by the throat.

GUARD 1: HGK

37.3

Moon King walks away from the corpses of the two guards, holding his bloodied crescent dart. Guard 1’s head is crushed into the floor like pulp.

37.4

The end of the hallway leads to the back doors. A team of seven armed guards stands at a line, aiming at Moon King.

GUARD 2: STAND DOWN, SPECTOR!!!

MOON KING: Be warned.

37.5

Moon King’s eyes.

MOON KING: You face a holy warrior.

Page 38

38.1

Close up. One of the team’s guns firing.

GUARD 4: RRRRAAAAA!!!!

SFX: BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM

38.2

Pull back. Guard 4’s just murdered his entire team.

GUARD 4: I… but…

MOON KING: The will of God overcomes reason.

38.3

Moon King walks by Guard 4. Guard 4 has the gun to his head.

MOON KING: Now die.

MOON KING: Your life is pointless.

GUARD 4: I… I don’t… want to die…

38.4

Guard 4 shoots himself in the head.

SFX: BLAM

38.5

Guard 4 collapses into the mess of his team’s corpses.

MOON KING: And now, vengeance for those of deformed mind, who cry for salvation.

38.6

Moon King’s eyes glow red. A fire breaks out behind him, around the bodies.

MOON KING: May this wretched house of healing burn.

Page 39

39.1 Splash Page

Moon King walks away from Ravencroft as it burns, the entire facility sending smoke into the sky.

MOON KING: And so they cry no more.

Page 40

40.1

Marlene sits up in bed, Jack next to her. Her eyes are glowing red.

CAPTION: 11:10 PM.

40.2

Marlene walking out of her apartment.

40.3

Marlene standing in front of the museum.

40.4

Marlene entering the Tomb of Chons exhibit.

Page 41

41.1

Moon King stands in front of the museum’s front doors.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 14, 2013.

SUB-CAPTION: 12:01 AM.

MOON KING: The God-Key. So close.

41.2

Moon King opens the front door.

MOON KING: So kind of her.

MOON KING: My gatekeeper.

41.3

Moon King walks down a hallway of the museum. He has his crescent dart in hand.

MOON KING: I can hear her breathing.

41.4

Moon King stands behind Marlene. Marlene is standing in front of the pedestal with the chest on top.

MOON KING: My fallen queen.

MARLENE: God… Khonshu… it is here… the God-Key…

41.5

Moon King offers his hand.

MOON KING: Give it to me, my love.

41.6

Close up. A blur of silver and blue.

MARLENE: Yes.

Page 42

42.1 Splash Page

Marlene stabbing Moon King in the chest with the Claw of Bastet. Moon King’s hand is raised as if to strike with his crescent dart, but he was too late.

MARLENE: Take it!

MOON KING: AAAA

Page 43

43.1

Moon King looks at the knife in his chest, glowing blue.

MOON KING: Nh…nuh…

43.2

Moon King looks up. His body is glowing a brighter blue now.

MOON KING: I’LL KILL YOU!

43.3

Khonshu is pulled back from Marc by a blue light. All of the shadows come with Khonshu. Marc is left with only the white pants he wore in the asylum, the straightjacket’s dissolved.

KHONSHU: KKAAA

MARC: GH

43.4

Marc stands, doubled over. There is no blood coming from the dagger in his chest. A ghostly image of Bastet stands over him.

MARC: Hhk…aa…

BASTET: Hello, Marc Spector.

MARC: Bl… blue… beautiful…

BASTET: Thank you.

43.5

Bastet’s eyes.

BASTET: Now see.

BASTET: See what he has done.

43.6

Marc looks at Marlene, his eyes glowing blue. The ghostly image of Bastet is fading away.

Page 44

44.1

Side shot. Marc is looking up to see Marlene. Marlene looks just behind Marc.

MARC: Mhm…Marlene…it’s you.

MARLENE: Khonshu…

44.2

Marc turns his head, eyes wide.

MARC: Holy…

44.3

Khonshu stands behind Marc. A being of pure shadow now, red eyes brighter than ever before.

KHONSHU: WWEEE CAN… SSSTILL WINN!

44.4

Marc looking at the dagger in his chest, Marlene shouting toward him.

MARLENE: Marc! The dagger! USE IT!

44.5

Marc rips the dagger from his chest. There is no blood in the wound, and the dagger is now glowing blue.

KHONSHU: WE… ARE… GOD…

MARC: No.

44.6

Marc glares at Khonshu.

MARC: We’re not the same person anymore.

MARC: Bastet cut us apart.

MARC: Didn’t you see?

Page 45

45.1

Khonshu glares at Marc.

KHONSHU: Doesn’t… matter….

KHONSHU: Looove… for pain…for hatreddd… is mmmy life.

KHONSHU: My BEATING HHHEART!

45.2

Marc runs at Khonshu with the dagger.

MARC: NOT ANYMORE!

45.3

Marc stabs Khonshu with the dagger. The wound glows blue.

45.4

Khonshu’s beak is wide open, as if to scream. But he can’t scream.

KHONSHU: !

Page 46

46.1

Marc’s stepped back. The wound is starting to cause a chain reaction. A wave of blue energy, eating away at Khonshu’s shadowy body. Dissolving him, slowly.

KHONSHU: I...

46.2

Marlene looks at Marc and Khonshu. Everything up to Khonshu’s chest is gone.

KHONSHU: I was… Omega… God…

KHONSHU: We… were…

MARC: Were.

MARC: But never again.

KHONSHU: No.

46.3

Khonshu’s eyes. Everything else is gone, and they’re next.

KHONSHU: Always.

46.4

Close up on the crescent dart that Marc dropped as Moon King. It’s evaporating.

46.5

Marc and Marlene stand alone in the room.

MARC: It’s beautiful.

MARLENE: He’s finally gone.

MARC: The world… it’s not red.

46.6

Marc looks at Marlene.

MARC: Beautiful.

Page 47

47.1

Marlene looks toward the chest on the pedestal. It’s glowing red, and there’s visible steam rising from inside.

MARLENE: It really is.

47.2

Marlene grabs Marc’s arm.

MARLENE: Come on.

47.3

Marlene rushes Marc out of the exhibit.

MARLENE: Let’s get the hell out of here.

47.4

The chest on the pedestal.

47.5

The inside of the chest. The Talon of Khonshu is a molten pile of goo.

Page 48

48.1

Marlene and Marc standing in an alley. Marc’s changed into some clothes that Marlene clearly snatched out of a donation bin.

MARC: Look, Marlene…

MARLENE: Save it, okay?

MARLENE: I know.

MARC: Actually, I was just gonna say thanks for the clothes. But--

48.2

Side shot. Marc and Marlene talking.

MARLENE: Stop.

MARLENE: I know everything, okay? I know why you left with the other Moon Knights from my apartment that day.

MARLENE: It was to protect me.

MARC: And everything since… I remember all of it. All the people I’ve murdered.

MARLENE: All the times you hurt me.

MARC: … Yeah.

48.3

Marlene punches Marc in the face.

48.4

Marc looks up at Marlene, rubbing his jaw.

MARLENE: We’re not even.

MARLENE: But I’m officially over it.

MARC: Okay.

MARLENE: I know you never wanted to hurt me. But that doesn’t matter, you understand me?

MARLENE: I’m starting over.

48.5

Marc.

MARLENE: You know… I knew you’d come back. I wasn’t even shocked when I saw you come out of that monster. I knew I’d have to say this.

MARLENE: Get out of my life and stay out.

MARLENE: Got it?

48.6

Marlene.

MARC: …

MARC: Understood.

Page 49

49.1

Marc starts walking away from Marlene.

MARLENE: There is one question I have.

MARC: Hm?

49.2

Marc.

MARLENE: What will you do now?

MARC: The only thing left to do.

49.3

Back shot. Marlene watches Marc walk away.

MARC: Goodbye.

MARC: It’s been fun.

49.4

Marlene looks at the night sky.

49.5

Marlene walks the opposite direction Marc did.

MARLENE: Goodbye.

Page 50

50.1

Marc Spector in a prison uniform. He’s escorted toward his cell by a guard.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 15, 2013.

SUB-CAPTION: 7:00 PM.

CAPTION: MARC: Finally.

50.2

Marc sitting on the bench in his cell.

CAPTION: MARC: I’m where I belong.

50.3

Marc cracking his knuckles.

SFX: KRK

CAPTION: MARC: I can finally do what I was born to do.

SFX: KRAK

50.4

Marc glares through his cell, looking at all the other cells.

CAPTION: MARC: Hurt people.

Page 51

51.1

Prison yard, daytime. Marc stands over a man with a face like pulp, other inmates crowd around him.

CAPTION: FEBRUARY 16, 2013.

CAPTION: MARC: All the right people.

51.2

Marc takes on an inmate who rushes at him.

INMATE: HRRAAA!

CAPTION: MARC: Maybe before I die, I can balance the scales.

51.3

Marc piledrives the inmate who rushed him.

SFX: WHD

CAPTION: MARC: Hurt all the right people.

51.4

All of the inmates rush at Marc.

CAPTION: MARC: Earn my way to redemption the only way I know how.

51.5

Marc comes out on top. Inmates are thrown back from him.

CAPTION: MARC: With bloodied fists.

Page 52

52.1

A wedding ceremony full to capacity, set outside at a park on a beautiful sunny afternoon. Marlene stands at the alter across from Jack. The priest smiles with open arms as he conducts the ceremony.

CAPTION: NEVER, ALWAYS.

PRIEST: And do you, Marlene Alraune, take Jack Spencer to be your lawfully wedded husband?

MARLENE: I do.

52.2

The priest looking at Jack.

PRIEST: And do you, Jack Spector, take Marlene Alraune to be your lawfully wedded wife?

JACK: I do.

PRIEST: Then by the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife.

MARLENE: Spencer.

52.3

The priest looking at Marlene, confused.

PRIEST: Hm?

MARLENE: It’s Spencer.

PRIEST: No.

MARLENE: Excuse me?

52.4

Khonshu stands in Jack’s place, tuxedo and all. Marc Spector is the priest.

MARC: You heard me.

KHONSHU: What’s the matter, darling?

52.5

Marlene steps back from the alter, looking around in terror.

MARLENE: I…

Page 53

53.1

Overhead shot. The seating for the wedding surrounds the alter in a crescent shape.

MARC: Miss Spector!

53.2

Marlene looks at the family members and friends seated. Everyone’s head rests as far back as possible. Their throats are all sliced open across, and blood pours from their wounds.

MARC: Miss Spector, please!

53.3

Marlene is suddenly soaked in blood from head to toe.

MARC: I understand you are a BLUSHING BRIDE… but come, darling!

MARC: We must finish the ceremony!

MARLENE: Of…course.

53.4

Marlene smiles. The blood on her face is dry already from the heat. Tears roll down her face.

MARLENE: Would you… could you… play the song?

MARLENE: I want… to do this right.

53.5

Marc smiles.

MARC: Of course.

MARC: Let’s try this again.

Page 54

54.1

Marlene now stands at the back of the aisle. Smiling.

CAPTION: ♫ HERE COMES THE BRIDE ♫

54.2

Side shot. Marlene walks down the aisle. The corpses are attracting flies.

CAPTION: ♫ ALL SOAKED IN RED ♫

54.3

Khonshu sheds a single tear of happiness.

CAPTION: ♫ RUN, RUN AWAY ♫

54.4

Marlene stands at the alter with Khonshu. Marc is in full Moon Knight costume now.

CAPTION: ♫ SOON WE’LL ALL BE DEAD! ♫

54.5

Marlene and Khonshu kiss.

Page 55

55.1

A large hotel suite. Marlene sits up in bed, gasping, eyes wide.

CAPTION: AUGUST 13, 2013.

MARLENE: !

55.2

Marlene looks to her side. Her sleeping husband is undisturbed.

55.3

Marlene walks from the large bed toward the bathroom.

55.4

Marlene stares at the bathroom mirror. She’s smiling. From the bathroom window, the Moon can be seen.

MARLENE: All this time… and it’s only dreams now.

Page 56

56.1 Splash Page

The Moon.

MARLENE: Thank God.

THE END

#1 Posted by FadeToBlackBolt (23334 posts) - - Show Bio

Very nice, mate. Really enjoyed it. I'm glad you kept Marc alive. I was really expecting him to die lol

I liked that you're expecting with the panel layout too (the 6-6-6 configuration), that was clever =)

I enjoyed Marlene's PTSD too, I mean it wasn't very "enjoyable" in the traditional sense, since it was horrifying lol, but it was well written and I liked it.

As always though, in my opinion at least, your best accomplishment is pacing. It's always very easy to read your work, both in terms of how you present it, and the story itself.

So to others quickly perusing this who are frightened by the length, do not worry, as it IV123 keeps it a fluid and thoroughly enjoyable read that never once feels like a chore to get through.

#2 Edited by InnerVenom123 (29499 posts) - - Show Bio

@FadeToBlackBolt: Thanks a lot, man. The 6-6-6 panel thing was Jordan's idea, I can't take credit for that. But thanks.

And for the disclaimer. Hopefully the masses won't flee. :P

#3 Posted by lykopis (10756 posts) - - Show Bio

That was a fantastic read --- had me reading through unblinking actually. Macabre and brutal but very stark as well -- completely submersed me in the story with every panel description forcing me to accept what was happening. Very surreal but extremely powerful -- the terror was always right there and it had me just reeling for Marlene. Even for Marc -- love that you had him take on his past and twist it into something he could use to repent.

Thanks so much for creating this -- so very well done.

#4 Posted by InnerVenom123 (29499 posts) - - Show Bio

@lykopis said:

That was a fantastic read --- had me reading through unblinking actually. Macabre and brutal but very stark as well -- completely submersed me in the story with every panel description forcing me to accept what was happening. Very surreal but extremely powerful -- the terror was always right there and it had me just reeling for Marlene. Even for Marc -- love that you had him take on his past and twist it into something he could use to repent.

Thanks so much for creating this -- so very well done.

Thanks so much!

#5 Posted by Frenemy (1240 posts) - - Show Bio

@InnerVenom123: The hardest part about writing for me most of the time is dialogue. You write it well and I'm pretty jello lol.

#6 Posted by InnerVenom123 (29499 posts) - - Show Bio

@Frenemy said:

@InnerVenom123: The hardest part about writing for me most of the time is dialogue. You write it well and I'm pretty jello lol.

Practice makes perfect, I suppose. Keep at it.

And thanks!

#7 Edited by Deranged Midget (17599 posts) - - Show Bio

Wow! Now that was quite the hefty read IV! I love that you always continue to branch your stories together and bring bits and pieces back. It feels like constantly reading one giant coherent story! Your pacing is brilliant and you ease the reader in so brilliantly that it's so effortless to imagine the story panel by panel! And that ending... Man, shivers were sent down my spine!

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#8 Edited by InnerVenom123 (29499 posts) - - Show Bio

Wow! Now that was quite the hefty read IV! I love that you always continue to branch your stories together and bring bits and pieces back. It feels like constantly reading one giant coherent story! Your pacing is brilliant and you ease the reader in so brilliantly that it's so effortless to imagine the story panel by panel! And that ending... Man, shivers were sent down my spine!

Thank you!

#9 Posted by hellmouse (99 posts) - - Show Bio

This is awesome!! :D

Nice work, man. Did not even realise you wrote fics here O_O