Rated "M" for language. 8-Ball is property of Marvel. The name Spider-Girl is property of Marvel, but the re-imagined character here is mine. Superman property of DC. 8-Ball's henchpeople are mine. More Pyromania here Pyroverse library
Metropolis. The big city. A place to make a name for yourself as a hero. Or fashion designer. Or a villain. It truly is a wellspring of opportunity for all to make a name for themselves. That's what Maria Parker was doing here. She was out to make a name as a fashion designer, (once she escaped college that was) and if she got to make a name as Spider-Girl too, then all the better.
She had been investigating a series of low rent crimes, hoping it would lead up to a big villain, since you couldn't sneeze in Metropolis without a villainous plot being involved. And she was right. Sort of.
* * *
The steel door to the pool hall basement slammed inward, and leaned awkwardly on one hinge. The small girl in the doorway didn't look strong enough to open a jar of pickles. Let alone kick a heavy door off one of its hinges. "Sorry to invade your boys only club, but the fire marshal has a ten goon limit down here, and there's clearly..." She quickly counted. "five of....you....okay. Take two? Anyone? Not so good with the one liners." She shrugged.
"You just scratched the, I'm afraid." 8-Ball said evenly as two henchmen came at her twirling pool cues like batons. One was dressed in a yellow body suit and mask. A black number one was printed on his mask and chest. His partner had the same costume, except in orange. And the number was five.
"Is that your line? Cause it was bad." She kicked 1 in the stomach, and grabbed his pool cue. She half turned, and pulled him over her back as 5 slammed his pool cue down on 1's back. As she stood up, she punched 5 in the throat, then turned and bashed 1 in the head with his own cue. She webbed 1 to the wall as he (she?) still choked from the throat punch. Then webbed the unconscious 5 to the floor. "I'm not one of those joking hero's, but even I know a good villain needs better lines then that." She stepped toward 8-Ball, who still had not moved. Neither had who was obviously a girl. 'The only girl in the gang is the six? There is something kinky about that.' She thought to herself, but couldn't recall what it was. That was when a huge guy all in white stood up from the shadows.
"I love to teach upstart new players like yourself. Rule number one, billiards is all about controlling the cue ball child. You broke well, but its my turn to shoot now."
Cue Ball was six feet holy-crap inches tall. And probably weighed three hundred pounds or better. His suit was all white. His mask was a smooth blank. Not even eye holes. The monster lifted one side of the pool table in the center of the room, and flipped it at Spider-Girl like it was a toy.
Spider-Girl leaped over the heavy table as it came down on 5 with a crash. "Ooh. Well crime doesn't pay. Remember that when you come out of your coma." She webbed up Cue ball's face out of habit, and drove a kick high. But he somehow grabbed her leg, and threw her against the wall with a thud. She was stunned, but rolled aside as the behemoth tried to grab her, and webbed his hands to the floor. "Checkmate 8-Ball, to use a mixed metaphor." She smirked as 8-Ball leaned back, and made a tent with his fingers.
"Only experienced players call a shot before they make it little spider." The most annoying thing was he didn't sound beaten. Or even angry. He sounded like a teacher giving her a lecture in a classroom. Like she didn't get enough of that jazz already. Then she heard the sound of fabric ripping. Cue Ball's gloves were still webbed to the floor, but the monster was loose again. "Six Ball in the corner pocket." 8-Ball intoned. Spider-Girl swore she could hear his smug smile. stopped rubbing 8-Ball's chest like a girl prisoner out of some nerds fantasy, and pulled a sword from behind her. She rushed forward and swung her sword at Spider-Girls stomach. Spider-Girl leaped up at the last second, narrowly avoiding the blade, and slipped through Cue Ball's arms as he grabbed for her. 's sword sliced into Cue Ball's waist, and drew a line of blood. But if he felt it, it didn't show.
Spider-Girl used Cue Ball's shoulders as a spring board, and flipped towards 8-Ball. "Time to sink the eight ball." She said.
"Ah ah. You haven't sank the six ball yet." He chided, and thrust his cue stick at her. Spider-Girl dodged aside and the cue hit Cue Ball in the chest with concussive force. His enormous bulk slammed into , and they both hit the ground with a crash.
"You played well child. But I'm afraid the game is over now."
"Dude! I know you got a theme--" She ducked as he swung the pool cue at her head. "--here. But give it a break already." She punched him in his face, but his helmet/mask was made of something pretty hard. And he didn't seem to feel it. Her mask was not made of such stuff, and she felt his fist slam into her mouth very well. Spider sense was really on the fritz lately.
"Bank shot." 8-Ball said, and hit her easily with the cue, but the force was like being hit with a car, and Spider-Girl was knocked across the room, into the opposite wall.
"F*ck." Spider-Girl coughed, as she held her chest. For a b-list villain, he packed an impressive weapon. Absurdly, a line crossed her mind. 'Is that your pool cue, or are you just excited? Nah. Screw that one-liner bullsh*t. A little late anyway.' 8-Ball took his time walking towards her, because like all villains, he had to milk the moment.
"You're not the first cape to gamble, and lose to me. Though I suppose that's little comfort as you are about to die."
"Oh no! If only I had some last resort move! Oh wait, I totally do!" She slung webbed his ankles, and yanked his feet from under him. "Ah ah." She mocked his lecture-y tone of voice as she stepped on his wrist, and pressed down with a crunch. To his credit, he barely yelled. But he did release the cue stick, which Spider-Girl picked up. "I'm not much for pool. But I always wanted to try golf..." She raised the cue like a golf club. "Fore!!!!" She swung down. 8-Ball's mask/helmet shattered loudly.
"Ahem." A firm hand fell on her shoulder. Spider-Girl drove her elbow into the goons stomach, but it was like hitting a brick wall.
"F*ck!!" She spun around, and cursed again. She had just elbowed Superman. "Uh hi. Help you?" She asked, unsure what to say.
"I heard the sounds of concussive explosions. I decided to investigate." He replied unsmiling. His arms crossed over his chest.
"Okay. Well....I got it covered here big guy. But while I have you, I feel its my responsibility. No. Its my privilege. To tell you you're wearing your underwear over your pants." She smirked at him. She was nervous as hell, but wasn't gonna show him that.
"I don't know how they operate where you come from Ms....?"
"Spider-Girl." She was mildly insulted he didn't know of her.
"Okay. But this is my town. If your going to operate here, you do it by my rules--"
"Do I have to wear my undies on the outside of my pants?" She interrupted.
"Maybe if you were wearing pants." He replied dryly. "Rule number one. We don't use excessive force to apprehend criminals." He pointed to 8-Ball's shattered wrist. Apparently he had been watching for a few moments. "The police have been notified." He turned to leave. "I don't want to have this talk again." With that he flew away, leaving Spider-Girl to web the villains to the floor.