#1 Edited by Army2442 (1485 posts) - - Show Bio

Asgard 1500 A.D.

Odin's throne room

Odin, the all father of all creation, is himself standing over a tied up and roughed up Loki, The literal God of lies and son of Odin. Looking down at Loki Odin said "for your insolence and trickery that has endangered all of Asgard, you are hence forth exiled indefinatley" and with that he had Loki thrown out of Asgard. Loki was thrown out to random space he eventually ended up on a planet surrounding a mysterious and advanced planet called Krypton. Taking an interest in the planet he used what remained of his magic to observe the planet further. Loki soon realized that the kryptonians were very "special" in that if under a yellow sun they could become powerful enough to challenge or defeat his hated brother Thor in direct combat. Loki also noticed that the planet was soon going to collapse upon itself, so he bided his time until it happened.

When the fateful day finally came Loki used his magic to influence Kal-el 's pod to land on earth which had a yellow sun. With everything set in place Loki teleported himself back to earth, where he was taken back by how much it changed since he left but he though to himself "it matters not how much they have changed I will ruled over then all soon enough".

Thats all for now but how do you guys like it?

#2 Posted by wildvine (8361 posts) - - Show Bio

I like it. only problems are a few grammatical and spelling. "indefinitely" for one. I think line 3 is a type-o. "He eventually ended up on a planet surrounding a mysterious and advanced planet". line 6, "So he bid his time..." Bid is the past tense of bide.

#3 Posted by tomdickharry1984 (834 posts) - - Show Bio

Loki blew up Krypton?

#4 Posted by Army2442 (1485 posts) - - Show Bio

@tomdickharry1984 said:

Loki blew up Krypton?

no it collapsed into itself like it did in the regular continuity.

@wildvine: Thanks for the heads up and part should be up soon.

#5 Posted by wildvine (8361 posts) - - Show Bio

@Army2442 said:

@tomdickharry1984 said:

Loki blew up Krypton?

no it collapsed into itself like it did in the regular continuity.

@wildvine: Thanks for the heads up and part should be up soon.

Coolios.

#6 Posted by 4donkeyjohnson (1622 posts) - - Show Bio

Bit short, but interesting set up. Some grammatical errors and this opening sentence {Odin, the all father of all creation} could may be changed to Odin, the All-Father of creation; only because there is too many ALL's in it :) Good though

#7 Posted by Rusty_Irons (627 posts) - - Show Bio

I like it.