#1 Edited by RedRobinTimDrake (145 posts) - - Show Bio

8:30 p.m.,New York city

Flash walks down the street going back to his apartment after work with the rain pounding over his hood. He caught a glimpse of something in the corner of his eye,Flash went to see what it was. When he looked he saw nothing ,but it saw him. Once he got to his apartment he was worn out from the day, he went to sleep as soon as he hit the bed the thing followed him all the way there the thing was the symbiote. The symbiote started climbing over his body from head to toe. Flash appeared on top of a building a alarm rung. Flash's head began to hurt the symbiote began to scream,the next thing Flash new he was awake at his apartment in bed.

7:00 a.m., New York city

"what happened" Flash thought what happened last night was all just a dream. he went out to the market and when Flash got back his place was wrecked. Flash saw the symbiote crawling around. Flash snuck over to his gun case picking up his pistol he fired multiple rounds into the symbiote. The symbiote climbed over to him wrapping around him! The police showed up walking up to the the door of Flash's home. "Sir will you open the door?" one of the cops said as he began to grasp his pistol. The door was kicked out knocking both of the cops to the floor. The symbiote wanted to kill the men but flash fought against the urge. "Please dont hurt us!" One of the cops said in terror. while the other got out his pistol. The man fired at Flash but he quickly moved to the side dodging the bullet then shooting a web like thing at the barrel of the pistol. Flash went back inside and grabbed his rifle and then ran away. One of the officers quickly went to the radio messaging the station about the man. "Help the man escaped and attacked us,the man is armed and has weird powers!"

8:00 a.m. New York city

Helicopters began to patrol the city looking for this masked vigilante. Cops cornered Flash in a ally way Flash had no way out Flash tried to hop onto a short building next to him he missed but his hands and feet stuck to the wall. Flash began to notice his powers were similar to the hero spider-man. Flash began to swing from building to building. "Whoa haha this is different." Flash said to himself he noticed a helicopter flying behind him he stuck to a building and then jumped into the helicopter he grabbed a man by the throat then threw him out of the helicopter into a building and fired a bullet through the pilot's head crashing the helicopter with Flash jumping out of it. Flash got on a roof and hid there the rest of the night.

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Tell me what you thought, and in this story is mine and that is why he still has his legs.

#2 Posted by darth_brendroid (1717 posts) - - Show Bio

It's interesting and flows alright. I like the mystery regarding the symbiote's sudden appearance in New York as well.

#3 Edited by RedRobinTimDrake (145 posts) - - Show Bio

thanks but it was shorter than I hoped, I started writing it late and then I got really tired.

#4 Posted by primepower53 (5686 posts) - - Show Bio

a few grammar mistakes. Try to use more detail and dialogue/thoughts to build up suspense.

Overall great story.

#5 Posted by RedRobinTimDrake (145 posts) - - Show Bio

okay I will try and thanks

#6 Posted by TheCannon (18726 posts) - - Show Bio

Thought I commented on this. Sorry.

Nice work.

#7 Posted by RedRobinTimDrake (145 posts) - - Show Bio

Thanks

#8 Posted by deadpoolrules (4683 posts) - - Show Bio

very good man,now I know why you were pissed of with me :P