All Characters are Owned by Marvel Comics
Jester's 11 #3 -Twenty One, Dealer Loses.
Jester - Clowning Around
Vapour - ClH + NaOH --> NaCl + H2O
Speed Demon - Fast and Furious
Diamondback - Venomous Intent
Volcana - About to Blow
Snake Marston - Corner Master
Oriole - A dead duck?
X-Ray - Lead Lined
Overrider - Free Recovery
8-Ball - Taking a Cue
Drill - Lose Screws
Brass - 11110110
Speed Demon slid round the corner his hand clutched round a throwing knife ready for when he found Fixer. The only trouble was that he had combed almost the entire warehouse and his prey was still evading him. Clearing the next aisle he reached a long row of armour suits charging on the wall, with a huff he took off again only to hear something move behind him and turned to investigate. Darting along he saw the cause of the noise and smiled, Fixer had been hiding behind a suit of Beetle Mk 2 armour and by moving to a new location had given himself away. As he ran Fixer turned, a large four barrelled shotgun in his hand and fired, the projectiles detonating into gel that covered the floor and trapping Speed Demon mere metres from his prey.
"Stop struggling." Fixer ordered, "That adhesive belongs to the Trapster so even you would have a hard time escaping."
"I don't care." Speed Demon snarled as he tried to escape. "You are outnumbered and outgunned."
"But I have an entire arsenal of super villain tech at my fingers." Fixer answered, "Now stick around while I capture your friends. If you're lucky you might be sharing a cell with one of them when SHIELD drag you off to the raft." He added as he stalked off into the shadows.
"Man look at some of this stuff babe."' Drill gasped as he walked past a row of modified tools. "That's the Wrecker's Crowbar, I always wanted to get my hands on that."
"I think we should leave stuff were we find it." Volcana chided, "Some of this stuff is owned by people who would rip our heads off in a second if we did. I mean look at what happened to Steeplejack, some people are saying the Wrecker caved is head on in with that very crowbar."
"Maybe you're right babe." Drill sighed, "Hey check this out magic incense." He read off the card next to the pair of red candles emblazoned with pentagrams. "The smoke is guaranteed to increase libido of anyone who is exposed to the smoke. Apparently these were confiscated from some chic called Santana when SHIELD arrested her last year."
"Not interested." Volcana answered as they reached a junction between shelves unaware of the silent figure tailing them along the top of the shelves.
"Ah come on it's not like it's a portable nuke it's just a few candles that makes sex amazing." Drill whined. "Ah sod it." He added as he pocketed the candles. "Which way now babe."
"You stay right there." Fixer ordered as he dropped an electrified net down onto Drill, the weighted ends pining him to the floor as Volcana ignited her body and fired a wave of fireballs up at their attacker. Nimbly Fixer sprung from shelf top to shelf top before dropping down to the floor next to a vat marked with bio-hazard stickers. "Oh SHIELD is going to kill me for this." He moaned as Volcana ripped the net off Drill, her body blazing in the darkness, burning footsteps glowing in the concrete floor.
"You look hot babe." Drill stated.
"Thanks now let's go and show that little weasel how hot I am." Volcana purred as her body converted to it's plasma form, her footsteps now s hot that they warped the floor as she walked. "Hey Fixer where's you're pathetic little toys like that net."
"The net belongs to Kraven." Fixer answered as he pushed the vat into the middle of the aisle. "This belongs to another one of New York's worst." He added as he fingered a detonator before squeezing the trigger, the explosive charges on the side exploding leaving a crack in the side, water spraying from the inside.
"That's the hazardous substance." Drill snorted levelling his drill bit harpoon launcher at Fixer as Volcana summoned a scythe made of plasma energy into her hands.
"Wait for it kids." Fixer stated as he pulled out a pair of anti-grav discs and hovered away. Turning to face the expanding puddle the pair of villains watched as it rippled and surged forwards, the force hitting them like a freight train. With a roar it snaked off into the darkness leaving Drill and Volcana, now in her human form, gasping on the floor.
"I...told you...not...to...touch those candles." Volcana gasped.
"Oh shut up." Drill replied.
Vapour glided silently over the racks of equipment scanning the floor for any sign of Fixer or the sonic harness that the Jester wanted for his plan. She was curious about what the insane ex-comedian was planing, even going to the point of shucking her usual morals and standards and satisfying the creeps bizarre requests both in the field and in the bedroom. Shuddering she silently made a mental note to shower for a day when the work was finished. Down below and on the walls sirens began to scream and the wind pressure began to pick up as an array of ceiling mounted fans activated, the suction tearing at her gaseous body. Straining against the pressure Vapour flew down and coalesced under a rack of mineral samples.
"Overrider the fan just came online." Vapour hissed as she pulled herself along under the ram."It appears to be based on the tech in Cyclone's suit. Overrider come in."
"He can't here you." Fixer announced as he landed on the rack opposite her. "Your Comms are shut down so I can maintain the advantage of surprise."
"Let's see how surprise aids you against Chlorine Gas." Vapour snarled as tendrils of gas billowed towards Fixer, the Tech Guru shrugging as his Tech Pack formed a gas mask over his face.
"One of my old friends Hallie used chemistry to blast one of the Elements of Doom during our early years in the Thunderbolts. Sodium I think or maybe it was Caesium, whichever one he exploded into pieces and SHIELD stored his remains right under where you're standing."
"So!" Vapour hissed. Fixer smiled under his gas mask and pointed to the stream of salt forming from the U-Foes tail. With a scream Vapour tried to pull away but it was to late, her gaseous body solidifying before collapsing into a pile of salt floating in a pool of water.
"Just be lucky that Hydroman was stored away from this stuff or you may have been flushed away for ever." He mocked before his Tech Pack beeped three times, the lights mounted on the side glowing orange. "So Mr. Overrider you have come to fix you're toy robot." Fixer sneered, "Let's see how it fares against mine."
Overrider watched as Hydroman slithered out the warehouse door, the astonished looking mutant giving the liquid villain a wide birth before entering, his pistol drawn and ready for action. Cautiously he followed the spectral trail left by Brass's leaking radiator to find the bronze coloured robot slammed against the wall by one of the cannibalised hydraulic rams from the Stilt Man's armour.
"What happened to you?" Overrider gasped as he ran his hand over the robot's arm.
"That little rat we were meant to be chasing activated Stilts' legs traping Senior Roboto against the wall." Snake Marston grunted as he crawled out from under Brass. "Thing is he was acting strange before, he just stalled in front of the ram and took the blow. I'm fine by the way not that you asked by the way."
"Looks like Fixer activated a Signal Jammer that blocked my commands." Overrider cooed as he twisted the disc on Brass's neck, "A little frequency change and you will be right as rain." Brass shuddered before lashing out, his arms throwing the shelf clear before ripping the Stiltman's legs into pieces. "Ah it appears if this unit is feeling my anger for the man we're hunting, good because I plan to disassemble him."
"You have to get through my bodyguard first.'' Fixer's voice sounded as a loud buzzing filled the area. Perched on the remains of the Stiltman's legs stood the Beetle Mk 2 armour painted black and yellow. "After the original pilot abandoned this unit I made some modifications." Fixer explained, "My patience is wearing thin, leave my place of work or I will use my most lethal countermeasures."
"Try it." Overrider snarled, "The fact of the matter is that we are not leaving without that sonic harness." With a mechanical screech Brass lumbered forward and slammed the Beetle round the face before the automated suit of armour kicked out knocking Brass on to it's back. Flaring it's wings the Beetle took to the air and opened fire, stun rounds bouncing off Brass's shell as his driver took cover behind a dissected Ultron shell, it's eyes glowing slightly in the darkness. "It's magnificent isn't it." Overrider whispered to Snake as Brass returned fire, electrical bolts running along the Beetle's wings causing it to crash to the floor.
"Kind of." Snake replied from his hiding place behind the deactivated shell of the Hulk Robot. Looking up he saw the Beetle slash Brass, it's reinforced claws tearing Brass's armour before digging into the droid's chest cavity. Looking down in apparent confusion Brass slammed its fist through the Beetle's arm separating it from the main body before grabbing the smaller suit of armour by the head, the insectile armour kicking and flailing before it was slammed head first into the concrete. Turning to face it's master Brass fell to it's knees and collapsed, the internal damage to much for it to take.
"No." Overrider screamed as he ran over to the fallen robot. "No you can't be dead." He sobbed as he ran his hand across the droid's face, "No please you're my only friend you can't leave."
"Mate we need to go." Snake said quietly. "We still have a job to do."
"Leave me with him." Overrider sobbed as he banged his fists onto Brass's chassis. Snake rubbed his forehead before tapping his teammate on the shoulder causing him to turn round, hot tears burning across his pudgy face.
"Sorry mate." Snake apologised before punching Overrider out. Slinging the unconscious villain over his shoulder Snake ran across Brass's hand, "Thanks." He told the broken robot. "I promise to look after him now." He added before turning and leaving Brass's broken body behind him.
Diamondback strode confidently down the halls laden with equipment from super villains past and present. As she walked something gleaming in the twilight caught her eye and she bent down and picked the bladed winged token off of the floor. As she flipped the device through her hands a deep whooshing sounded
"Hey Oriole what do you make of that?" She asked not looking up. Oriole responded by screaming a warning as an automated Goblin Glider flew towards her, it's bladed tongue extended ready to skewer her. Ducking and rolling under the device she threw a pair of diamonds up at the bat winged aerial platform, the projectiles detonating on contact and sending the vehicle spiralling down to the floor.
"More incoming." Oriole yelled as five more gliders came swooping in launching pumpkin bombs and razor bat swarms, the later flying under their own power after their winged target as he banked around and returned fire, knife like projectiles intercepting the majority of the bats. Those few who did manage to get through bit into Oriole and begun to smoke and quickly rusted into a fine red dust, the areas where they struck rapidly healing as if nothing had happened. "Huh." Oriole gasped, "How the hell did I do that."
"A little help here." Diamondback yelled as she stabbed a diamond knife through one of the Glider's optical sensors, the damaged vehicle careering into a shelf full of novelty grenades resulting in a massive explosion. Backlit against the blaze the remaining gliders locked onto Diamondback and swooped down towards her. With an avian screech Prior dived down and landed on the left hand glider before stabbing his blades in and steering the vehicle into the centre pair, stepping over the tumbling wreckage onto the last glider a triumphant look on his face before stabbing his wings through the glider just as it fired a razor bat up at him, the projectile cutting his cheek, a single drop of blood leaking down through the glider and onto Diamondback's neck.
"Ah son of a..." she swore as Oriole landed next to her. "Must be some kind of corrosive fuel." Looking at his teammate's neck Oriole noticed that the skin on her neck looked almost like it had been mummified. "Thanks for the save it's really appreciated." She continued, "You okay?"
"Yeah fine." Oriole lied unconvincingly as he felt his cheek heal' "Everything's hunky dorey."
Fixer breathed a sigh of relief as he reached his safe room with the sonic harness still in his procession. Quickly typing in a multiple digit number he opened a security box and removed an alchemy pistol and energy shield that he had yet to inventory.
"Well this is were you are hiding." A voice cackled, Fixer turned to see the Jester standing in the doorway flanked by X-Ray and 8-Ball, the later already going through the motion to throw a pool ball that he knew was loaded with a taser. Activating the shield he hunkered down and reflected the orb as the thrower ran in with a pool cue, the tip glowing with energy as he slammed it down on the shield, the energy signatures mixing and cancelling each other out. With a swift steel knuckled punch Fixer pushed 8-Ball back as X-Ray streaked in firing off pulses of radiation that sent him flying into the back wall.
"I have just the thing for you." Fixer growled tapping a concealed button on the back wall, activating a glass box that fell down around the U-Foe.
"You think this can stop me." X-Ray chuckled, a massive smile etched on his features. Fixer smiled back and fired his Alchemy Pistol, the transmutation gel turning the glass to lead, the metal blocking the purple glow of his radiation. Advancing on the Jester, Fixer extended a serrated knife from his left knuckle before training the pistol on the clownish villain's forehead. "Sorry but it's only business." Fixer told him.
"Then give me the harness please." The Jester asked as he got out a yo-yo and preformed a few quick tricks before slamming it into Fixer's head, the bladed edge digging into his skull. With a yell Fixer threw him away before the Jester leaped over his head on the pogo stick and grabbed the harness from the desk. Opening fire Fixer watched as his foe leapt over the blasts, the gel quickly melting his safe room. "He he." The Jester laughed as he removed a pack of cards and flew them down onto the floor around Fixer. "This is fun." He added as he removed a water pistol that was concealed in his cane. "Let's see if I can win that stuffed toy."
Fixer flinched and leapt to his right, slamming down onto the cards, the multiple suites under his body exploding and ripping his body in half. With a harsh metallic screech Fixer attempted to get up only for 8-Ball to scrabble over and slam his cue through the man's head revealing circuits and wires. "Just another robot construct boss." He told the Jester as he melted X-Ray's lead coffin.
We have what we came for." The Jester cackled, "Now let's go before SHIELD turns up." He added as X-Ray floated out of the lead box and headed for the door. 8-Ball scanned the room before leaving. Behind the wall the real Fixer sighed in relief, while the harness they had stolen worked it was faulty and would only run at half strength. Opening the false wall he strode out and looked at the damaged room.
"It will take an age to clean this up." Fixer moaned.
"I wouldn't worry about that." A voice from behind him hissed as hands wrapped around the former Thunderbolt's neck and twisted the bones snapping before splintering as Fixer's murderer dropped him to the floor.