#1 Posted by moviegeek17 (1422 posts) - - Show Bio

Link to the prologue: http://www.comicvine.com/forums/fan-fic/8/marvel-genesis-thundra-destined-prologue/657724/#11

Marvel Genesis Presents...

Thundra: Destined (Part 1)

Inside a worn down military compound sits Thundra facing her mother and another woman in full military attire.

Lyra: This will be your instructor for your first year daughter. She will focus on enhancing your strength and speed during your sessions.

Thundra raises her hand like in a classroom.

Instructor: You may speak.

Thundra: Where are the other girls? Shouldn’t they be hearing this too?

Instructor: There won’t be any other girls during your training Thundra.

Lyra: Your training isn’t for friends- it’s to prepare you for war. Other girls bring distractions, and we can’t have that.

Instructor: Matriarch is right, for the duration of your training you will be instructed privately.

Lyra: We’re not going to lie to you Thundra. Your training will be significantly more intense than what the other girls go through. It will push you to your very core, but if you survive it you will be reborn- as a femizon…

Cut to an Image of Thundra straining as she lifts some very heavy weights that no child her age should be able to.

Thundra (narration): A few days later I came to understand what they meant. Each day of training became a fight to survive that day’s regiments. It started off simple, lift 200 pounds.

Thundra continues lifting the heavy weights up and down very slowly and deliberately. Beads of sweat are showing everywhere on her face as she begins to truly exert herself. Lyra watches with a blank expression. She is all business in this situation in spite of watching her daughter accomplish something extraordinary.

Thundra (narration): The next day it was 300… now I think it’s somewhere in the 700 pound range. Mother has an interesting way of showing her love these days.

Lyra: You can stop now Thundra.

Thundra drops the weight back into place. She breathes heavily and with a sigh of relief.

Thundra: How much was that matriarch?

Lyra: 800 pounds.

Thundra (astonished): How- how is that possible matriarch?

Lyra (somewhat warm): I’ve already told you daughter, you were made for this- and what you’ve done now will be nothing compared to what you will be able to do when you’re older.

Thundra takes a moment or two trying to catch her breath. Lyra snaps out back into her instructor side.

Lyra: Head to the tracks. Your regiment isn’t finished yet…

Thundra slowly rises and begins walking to where the track is.

5 months later

Cut to Thundra running along a makeshift track circling the laps with unprecedented speed.

She zips past her instructor whose timing her laps intensely while writing down notes to herself.

Thundra (narrating): That’s how everything went with my training, finish one seemingly impossible task then move on to the next. It doesn’t matter how much I lift or how fast I go, I can always do it better.

Instructor: Faster Thundra!

Thundra somehow hears her instructor in spite of how fast she’s already going she pushes a step further going once again past her imit.

Instructor: 10, 9, 8, 7, 6…

Before the instructor can countdown to 1 Thundra zooms past her and skids to a stop.

She promptly collapses to the ground from exhaustion, laying there peacefully as the instructor calmly walks over to her. The instructor let a small smile crack her usually cold demeanor.

Instructor (trying to hide her grin): You’ve broken your own record. Your time was three minutes and fifteen seconds- Congratulations.

Thundra (narrating): Most children would break from the pressure, but not me. Somehow I knew they were right about me. I was capable of being stronger and faster, I could feel in my bones- All this potential that was just outside of my grasp.

Thundra is lying on the ground smiling joyfully at her accomplishment

Thundra (narrating): I decided early on with my training that I wouldn’t let anything stand in the way of unlocking my potential. I would make my mother proud- or die trying…

6 months later

Thundra is sitting down in a cafeteria eating a range of homemade organic foods. She looks much more seasoned with her training since the day she first arrived there.

Thundra (narrating): Days became weeks, weeks became months and before I knew it I was minutes away from taking the final test of my first year. I’ve changed so much in such a short amount of time that I can hardly recognize myself sometimes. I guess matriarch’s training is beginning to pay off after all…

She is sitting alone at the table while the other girls are casually conversing at their own tables. Thundra looks up from eating some spaghetti to notice several girls staring at her with a mix of awe and fear.

Thundra (narrating): The only downside to the way I’m trained is how the other girls react to me. Some glare at me, jealous of my enhanced abilities and individual training- but most just stare at as if I’m a freak. Not once have any of them tried to talk to me-

Thundra looks up at one of the girls, but this one’s stare is different from the others. She is staring at her with curiosity and even empathy. Thundra smiles back and takes her chance.

Thundra (friendly): Greetings sister…

Before Thundra can even finish her sentence the little girl runs away startled like a frightened rabbit. Thundra lowers her head in disappointment. This is not an uncommon occurrence for her.

Thundra (narrating): Why are they so afraid of me? Am I not a child like the rest of them? Just once I wish one of them would give me a chance to prove it- Just once…

A hand is placed gently on Thundra’s shoulder. It is not meant to alarm her but more to comfort her. Thundra looks up at whose hand it is and sees that it is her mother.

Lyra (motherly): Ignore them daughter. The children will not understand what you mean for our society, that revelation will come later in their lives. Come now- your final exam is ready.

Thundra nods back strong and resolute. In spite of the difficulties she faces they won’t stop her from achieving the goal she desires most.

They exit the lunchroom and walk down a long corridor filled with many doors. They stop by one particular room and walk in. It appeared to have formerly been a medical amphitheater that’s now been heavily modified. In the middle of the room is one giant weight that’s hooked up to some heavy machinery that’s humming very loudly.

Lyra: You have performed significantly better than I had anticipated Thundra. You have lifted all the heaviest conventional weights that we have which has forced us to invent a new method to challenge you.

Close up on the weight. They already appear to have four hundred pounds attached to each end but both of the ends have something connected that lead to the loud humming machine.

Lyra: This machine is currently supply both ends of your weights like a power supply and with that power we can use it to simulate any mass size we wish. Each time you lift the weight its mass will increase till it reaches its optimum mass for the exam, 2 tons. Lift this weight ten 5 times and you will pass your first year. Good luck daughter…

Lyra motions for her to go to the bench press. Thundra lies down on the bench and grips the cold steel of the bar with her hands. She looks up to see her mother in the observation deck of the room which is covered in glass.

Sound effect (from the machine): fffffzzzzzzzzzzzz

Lyra (over an intercom): You may begin

Thundra lifts the weight the first time without any significant troubles

Lyra: 1…

Sound effect: fffffffzzzzzzzzzzzz!

Suddenly the weight drops down out of Thundra’s control. She’s just able to regain control of the weight before it crushes her chest. She is shocked at how heavy the weight is now

Thundra: uggh!

Lyra: Push daughter!

Thundra struggles for a moment but is able to push the weight up.

Lyra: 2…

Sound effect: fffffffffffzzzzzzzzzzzrrrrrrrr

The weight once again plummets back down. She grits her teeth trying to maintain control of the weight. She flexes all of her muscles to make the weight move.

Thundra: rrrrgghhh!

Soon enough she is able to lift it up again.

Lyra: 3…

Sound effect: rrrrrrrfffttttttt!

The weight plummets once more and it takes all her might just to keep it level.

Thundra: rrrrrgghhhhh!

She strains for a few moments but ultimately is able to lift it.

Lyra: 5…

Sound effect: FFFFZZZZZZT!

The weight crashes violently back down to Thundra. She uses the last the last of might to prevent the mass of the weight from crushing her.

Thundra (straining): arrrgghgh!

Lyra: This is it daughter. Now is the time to make your first step towards becoming a femizon. Lift that weight one last time and you will begin that journey- failure is not an option…

Thundra tries with everything she has left but she can only seem to keep it where it is with that effort.

Thundra (narrating): Everything in my body screams for me to stop. Let the weight crush me under its enormous pressure- it would certainly be much easier than trying…

Thundra (straining): aaaarrrrrgghghhhhh

Thundra strains even harder, putting everything she has into lifting this weight- body and soul. Slowly the weight begins to rise.

Thundra (narrating): But it’s not in my genes. I am Thundra, daughter of Matriarch Lyra. I can accomplish anything I set my mind to- The future depends on me and not even Hela herself will stand in my way.

Thundra pushes herself further and lifts the weight up higher up. She is only a mere inch or two from completing this herculean task.

Thundra (narrating): And this “weight” is simply a roadblock.

Thundra throws the last of her energy into lifting the weight back into its handle. She instantly falls back to her with a sense of accomplishment

Sound effect: Clap! Clap, Clap!

Lyra: Congratulations daughter, I knew you had it in you.

Thundra (exhausted): Thank you matriarch… Two tons was a lot heavier than I had anticipated.

Lyra: Thundra there’s something you should know.

Thundra (confused): What?

Lyra: I lied about how much you were lifting daughter.

Thundra: How much did I lift?

Lyra: You lifted two tons in the beginning daughter- And that final one clocked in at 5 tons…

Thundra stares at her mother completely shocked at what she has accomplished. Lyra can’t help but smile with pride for her daughter.

Lyra: Rest up Thundra. Tomorrow we will begin training for your second year…

To be continued...

Editorial:

Hello again Marvel Genesis readers! I hope this chapter had enough character moments to suit your fancy. There's plenty more to come in this story and here's a little sample to excite you guys for next week. Next week Thundra faces her greatest challenge yet with her second year's training pushing her further than she could have possibly imagined. Her mother watches Thundra struggle throughout her training and a battle begins inside of her between her mother half and the warrior half. Will Thundra survive year two of her training? Which side of Lyra will win in her internal struggle? You'll have to read the next chapter of Thundra: Destined to find out :).

#2 Posted by The Impersonator (5620 posts) - - Show Bio

Great chapter! Loved the training session that Thundra does. (Which reminds me that Cable will do something different than that. =P)

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#3 Posted by moviegeek17 (1422 posts) - - Show Bio

@The Impersonator:

Thanks man, I'm glad you loved it! Thundra has probably one or two more chapters of training in store for her before i set up the story for the end of arc. And lets just say that Thundra's second year makes the first year seem like a vacation lol

#4 Posted by batkevin74 (11212 posts) - - Show Bio

Nice work, it's a great ongoing origin

#5 Posted by moviegeek17 (1422 posts) - - Show Bio

@batkevin74:

Thanks! Glad to hear you're enjoying the story and her origin.

#6 Posted by Decept-O (7292 posts) - - Show Bio

@moviegeek17: Going to offer honest input here. This is written in a script form, which I know some Viners are doing in the Fan Fic section. I can't say I am always keen on it but that isn't anything personal, it just isn't my preference.

However, you did a great job on offering visuals and capturing Thundra's personality and interactions with the other characters.

Perhaps it is a bit too long describing the training, I would pare it down because it seems to be a little repetitive.

You've managed to get people's attention with the concept and the story is good.

#7 Posted by The Impersonator (5620 posts) - - Show Bio

@moviegeek17 said:

@The Impersonator:

Thanks man, I'm glad you loved it! Thundra has probably one or two more chapters of training in store for her before i set up the story for the end of arc. And lets just say that Thundra's second year makes the first year seem like a vacation lol

You're welcome! Sounds nice. :)

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#8 Posted by wrestlgurl (40 posts) - - Show Bio

I like that you are taking a character like Thundra and "fleshing her out" a bit. I always liked the character concept behind Thundra since she first appeared in FF all those years ago. I'm looking forward to reading more.

#9 Posted by moviegeek17 (1422 posts) - - Show Bio

@wrestlgurl:

Thanks! I'm glad you're enjoying it. Thundra has always been one of those characters that i thought had potential to be an interesting character but was never given the chance. Btw did you read the prologue that came before this? If not i can send you the link to it.

#10 Posted by wrestlgurl (40 posts) - - Show Bio

@moviegeek17: Yep I read it. Nice, as well. Looking forward to more.