#1 Edited by BaneStrokeLoboGrundyBatArrow (1394 posts) - - Show Bio

This is a world where there was only one Superman, his name Ka-El. But his death on Earth-1222 shattered the community of heroes and soon everything fell apart. "Strength in numbers." This is true in almost every war, for the Great War between hero and villain it was a main factor.

Lex Luthor and his many allies tore down the superheroes in their moment of weakness. Kryptonite posining had destroyed Superman from the inside. His body became weak and he succumbed to the poison. After that was said and done. Luthor gathered up the thousands of villains promising them positions in the country's and states of the world. With this many followed and the ones who resisted were killed. Once the Great War was over many heroes were slain. Some heroes who had survived were put into prison and left to rot. Others in a moment of weakness joined the ever powerful empire to become servants for their cause. Once the heroes were put away or put in the ranks of villains the world was divided.

Of course Lex was president of the United States letting his most loyal run the states inside the country. But Braniac got Europe for his contribution in The Great War. The rest was divided up between the respectable villain. Darkseid Africa and China (though many did not trust him thinking he be to untrustworthy...) The lanterns Atrocitous and Sinestro guarded the Earths outer space so no one may get in or out. Their reward was Hal Jordan because now he would have to suffer through their immense torture. Their corps reward was to watch every day his pain and suffrage....

The world was in turmoil as gang violence ran rampant and slave labor was at an all time high. This was the age of the villains.....

BATMAN (BRUCE WAYNE)

I looked through the bars to Nightwing and he nodded his one eye steady. The only thing they had given Dick to cover his left eye was a bandage, because recently Dicks left eye was gouged out by Crocs torture games. Croc somtimes visited Banes jails to mess with the surivors and hit them alot. Besides a few heroes in this jail it was mostly AWOL convicts who were awaiting excution. Besides those facts it was almost time, time to get out of here and retake the Earth. We had been planning for months and couldn't afford to mess up. I heard Banes voice ring through the loud speaker;

"Feeeeding time puntas! Ahhahahaha!"

Lex instead of giving Bane a state for his war efforts gave him Gothams whole prison system, he was just fine with taking that. I heard the clanks of the trays hit the cold floor and anticipated Dicks meal to get here.

I didn't understand what we would do once out, all of the surviving heroes had been unmasked and had their names shown so its not like secrecy was tangible anymore. I hoped just once we got out we could make a difference. The guard came and Dick quickly shot up and grabbed the guards hands broke them and stole the keys. Dick was supposed to be handcuffed but after weeks of hitting them against stone we'd broken out of them. When the next guard came to help the fallen one I grabbed him through the bars and put him away. Dick unlocked my cage and we ran to the next spot. A shot rang out but it didn't matter we knew exactly what we were doing, where we were going, and most importantly where the exit was. We neared our next stop. It was Oliver Queens cell Dick unlocked it.

"Well about freaking time Bruce!"

I looked at Oliver and said

"C'mon one last stop before the armory."

We ran off to cell compartment B when Oliver spoke up,

"Oh man! Your not actually going to save that old man are you?"

"Listen Oliver Ted is one of the only other allies we have and you know how useful he is. And..."

Dick interrupted saying,

"We're here."

"Bruce is that you?" Ted Grant or Wildcat squinted up at me.

"Yes let's move we have to go."

Just then a bullet whizzed past me and I knew our plan would fall apart if we didn't hurry. Dick unlocked the cage and we sprinted turning a corner to get to the armory. Dick unlocked the door and we burst in. There memory's hit me. I could smell them almost feel them, my old allies. There was my suit, Jason's helmet, Tim's cape.... Bane had kept all my former Robins costumes as a trophies. Keeping the costumes was to show me he had....broke them.

I came back to reality and saw Green Arrow, Nightwing, and Wildcat had their costumes on.

"Bruce c'mon you're the one that wants us to hurry, plus we have no weapons so let's speed things up!"

Oliver didnt have to remind me I put on my suit and we headed out. Once out I felt his presence and spun around. Surrounded by at least 20 joker guards was Bane.

"Well Bruce, you picked the wrong day to f$&@ with me."

#2 Posted by Calvalier (50 posts) - - Show Bio

put them into paragraphs. it's much easier to read.

otherwise, it's an interesting intro.

keep it up.

#3 Posted by 4donkeyjohnson (1703 posts) - - Show Bio
#4 Edited by dngn4774 (3221 posts) - - Show Bio

@banestrokelobogrundybatarrow: This is a big slab of text which as

@calvalier said:

put them into paragraphs. it's much easier to read

Idea is great, execution not so great.

I agree with @4donkeyjohnson. Readers often have short attention spans when it comes to fan fic so line style works out better. Basically you just press enter whenever a different character is speaking.

#5 Edited by dngn4774 (3221 posts) - - Show Bio

@banestrokelobogrundybatarrow: Pretty good so far. I'm surprised it all fell apart without Superman so easily considering he's not the only powerhouse on the team (you'd think Wonderwoman, Martian Manhunter, or even Steel would step up).

#6 Posted by BaneStrokeLoboGrundyBatArrow (1394 posts) - - Show Bio

Thanks going to edit now!

#7 Edited by dngn4774 (3221 posts) - - Show Bio

BUMP!

#8 Posted by BaneStrokeLoboGrundyBatArrow (1394 posts) - - Show Bio

Oh God... I've been BUMPED!

#9 Posted by 4donkeyjohnson (1703 posts) - - Show Bio
#10 Posted by clemj (817 posts) - - Show Bio

what's the next part? I really enjoy it!

#11 Posted by BaneStrokeLoboGrundyBatArrow (1394 posts) - - Show Bio

@clemj: it's up now. And you can find more at the multiverse library

#12 Posted by _Braveheart_ (1853 posts) - - Show Bio

That's pretty good man!