#1 Edited by batkevin74 (10587 posts) - - Show Bio

(continued from http://www.comicvine.com/forums/fan-fic/8/5th-world-order-migraine-chapter-1/656155/#8 )

Many years ago I watched a documentary about a kid named Martin and his professor friend who go back in time in a car. It was an okay program that had two follow up programs but on the whole they made the actual act of time travel as simple as driving a car. LIES! As I found out first hand; time travel is more like being flushed through sieve at the speed of light then being reassembled by a cup stacking team all while inside a centrifuge. Then you have to pilot the time bubble which is like trying drive a cyclone whilst blindfolded and drunk.

Which is how I managed to plough the time bubble into the Eye of The Storm! I got out of the mess which thankfully did more damage to their ship than mine but it did breach every rule in the Legion time travel rulebook...which was written by Brainiac 5 who broke every rule he ever wrote anyway. Anyway I wasn’t going to be long

“Can I help you?”

I turned around to see The Engineer, Angela Spica. She was awesome, able to make anything mechanical with her body

“Oh hi” I tried not to gush “I’m Kerek. I’m from the 31 Century”

“Of course you are” she said as her left hand turned into a multi-taser unit

“Whoa! Hang on!” I said holding my hands up in non aggression “Look you’re part of Stormwatch. I...”

There was a flash and out of a ‘door’ stepped The Eminence of Blades and Apollo

“Wow!” I was impressed “Did you know he turns traitor?”

“What did you say?” growled The Eminence forming a sword in his hand

“Oops said too much” I covered my mouth. I could be causing time rifts by interactions

“What happened Ange?” asked Apollo

“Seems doofus here crashed into us from the 31 Century” she said

“Just throw him overboard” said Midnighter appearing out of the shadows which is really scary, especially since this place was lit up like a Christmas tree

“Hey! That’s not nice” I said

They all glared at me, I’ve never been so scared in all my life. Stormwatch gathered for me, it was awesome but awesome like seeing a school of great white sharks then realising you’re in the water

“You wear the symbol of the Legion” said the Martian Manhunter as he rose up through the floor “Let us see if your claims are true”

“Okay” I could feel him going into my mind telepathically and that’s when he screamed and collapsed and writhed on the floor, frothing at the mouth

“What did you do to him?” roared Apollo as he flew at me and smashed me into the wall. I wanted to respond but I’d just been hit by a train

“Would you believe” I gasped as Apollo squeezed me “Nothing. I didn’t do anything”

The Engineer made a medical bed for the Martian Manhunter “J’onn’s vitals are stable...I think” she said ‘Still not completely sure of Martian physiology”

Midnight and The Eminence flanked Apollo, one holding a metal staff the other a sword

“I didn’t do anything” I wheezed “But according to historical records I can tell you what happens next?”

“Really?” scoffed Midnighter

“Jack Hawksmoor will walk in here in seven seconds he’ll say “What’s going on? What’s wrong with J’onn?”” I said “Seven, six, five”

“Could be a suicide bomb?” said Apollo

“Nothing on my combat computer” replied Midnighter

“Three, two, one”

Jack Hawksmoor walked through a ‘door’ to our scene, I was so glad I was right.

“What’s going on? What’s wrong with J’onn?” he asked

“See” I smiled, Apollo let me go with a thump

“Seems we’ve got an invasion from the 31 Century” said The Eminence

“I’m not invading!” I protested “I’m just here to...wow I just realised that I came back in time to show a robot janitor I was better than him”

“Future’s full of idiots” mutter Midnighter

“I’m really sorry” I said “I’m one of your biggest fans. Your legacy is still around in the 31 Century. It’s been an honour”

“You’re not leaving” snapped Jack

“I have too” I said “Its one of the rules of time travel. How can I have heard of who you are, if I can’t go back to know that huh?”

The all looked at me trying to process my idiot logic when the was this impact


A yellow bolt of ‘lightning’ hit the roof above us and allowed Hyperspace to rush into the vacuum. Stormwatch launched into action and I snuck over to my time bubble and tried to leave when Jenny Quantum grabbed my ankle

“You can’t leave mister” she said “Try and I’ll shock your b@{{s off!”


Another hit from the bolt rocked the Eye and I fell into my ship as Jenny fell over

“Sorry Jenny but I gotta go” I waved at her and hit the button to go home; just as she fired off a massive dose of electricity at my time bubble as yet another bolt hit cutting off my warning to her “Beware the Sha...”


You know how I described time travel earlier, well imagine that ten times worse and completely directionless and you’ll know what time travel is like when powered by lightning and weird Hyperspace lightning.

When the ride stopped I was bobbing up and down on the ocean. I had no idea where I was and the time bubble clock read 4052AD before it burst into flames and the glass of the bubble began to crack. I fired up the flight ring and got out as it succumbed to its watery grave

“Where the hell am I?”

#2 Posted by joshmightbe (24876 posts) - - Show Bio

I had to chuckle about calling Back to the Future a documentary

#3 Posted by batkevin74 (10587 posts) - - Show Bio

@joshmightbe: Well in the 31st Century it probably is, later on I'm going to try to reference all them Chuck Norris documentaries ;)

#4 Posted by PrinceIMC (5421 posts) - - Show Bio
@batkevin74 If you ask a Flash you don't even need a car to time travel, just a cosmic treadmill.
#5 Posted by primepower53 (5686 posts) - - Show Bio

great chapter!

#6 Posted by The Poet (8335 posts) - - Show Bio


#7 Posted by batkevin74 (10587 posts) - - Show Bio

@PrinceIMC: That's true, though I never got the idea of running so fast on the spot would get you to travel through time. At least with a DeLorean you have actual forward motion

@primepower53: Thanks

@The Poet: Thank you also

#8 Posted by batkevin74 (10587 posts) - - Show Bio

Bumped so its next to chapter one, that is all

#9 Posted by The Poet (8335 posts) - - Show Bio


#10 Posted by tomdickharry1984 (836 posts) - - Show Bio

Back to the future is a trilogy of docos, very clever man! I like this, is the "lightning" Flash or Shazam? Keep up the goodness and also "Future's full of idiots!" :)

#11 Posted by batkevin74 (10587 posts) - - Show Bio

@tomdickharry1984: The lightning's a secret...for now

#12 Posted by tomdickharry1984 (836 posts) - - Show Bio

CozI liked this (insert facebook thumbs up)

#13 Posted by 4donkeyjohnson (1649 posts) - - Show Bio

{The all looked at me trying to process my idiot logic} The best kind of logic :) Also liked that BTTF is a doco

#14 Posted by batkevin74 (10587 posts) - - Show Bio

@4donkeyjohnson:Cool, seems you've found my back catalog :)