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#1 Edited by Allie_Ho (151 posts) - - Show Bio

After one day of celebration, two days of stupid Internet lags and crashes,I finally present the topic of our contest:

Make an OC in the Star Wars Universe!

To make things clearer, here are some ground rules:

1. The OC must interact/have connections with a known Star Wars characters(excluding other OCs to make things simpler)

2. The OC can reside in any of the time periods that are known:

-The Old Republic and mentioned history

-All Star Wars movie time periods

-Expanded Universe but no Star Wars: Legacy for clarity

3. The entry has a word limit of 1977 words (for the year Star Wars came out ;P)

4. No crossovers with any other genres and reality! (Sounds tempting, you to break)

The rest is up to your creativity and imagination, anything I haven't mentioned can be done.

The deadline is 3 weeks from now, March 9th at 11:59:59 PM Pacific Time.

May the force be with you!

"There is no try, do or do not." -Yoda

@The Poet: I don't have the instant reply button when pressing @ so I hope you see this!

PS. Ideas that you can use:

Revenge for some horrible characters in the Universe

Making a new love interest for a single character.

#2 Posted by stumpy49er (609 posts) - - Show Bio

Nice! Sounds like a worthy challenge. I've finally got my internet situation fixed so I shall finally submit an entry this time. No false promises this time. (I think)

#3 Posted by 4donkeyjohnson (1636 posts) - - Show Bio

Pardon my ignorance but what, pray tell is OC? @Allie_Ho: ??

#4 Posted by Decoy Elite (30041 posts) - - Show Bio

@4donkeyjohnson said:

Pardon my ignorance but what, pray tell is OC? @Allie_Ho: ??

Original character.

#5 Posted by cbishop (7207 posts) - - Show Bio

: Can you pin this please? Thanks.

, , , , , : Allie_Ho has got the new contest up! Come submit an entry. And hey, you folks invite more people - I just got home from work, and my brain doesn't wanna recall names right now. :}

#6 Posted by The Poet (8303 posts) - - Show Bio

Don't mind me...Just tweaked the video so it plays...

Moderator
#7 Posted by batkevin74 (10443 posts) - - Show Bio

@Allie_Ho Hmmm original Star Wars character...

#8 Posted by Allie_Ho (151 posts) - - Show Bio

@batkevin74 said:

@Allie_Ho Hmmm original Star Wars character...

Have any trouble? PM me! :P

#9 Posted by deathbymanga (661 posts) - - Show Bio

How do we publish our OC after we make him?

#10 Posted by Allie_Ho (151 posts) - - Show Bio

@deathbymanga: You attach it to a spoiler block and publish it here.

#11 Posted by Pyrogram (35159 posts) - - Show Bio

Ok, I need to enter this!!

#12 Edited by Mr_Stagger_Lee (174 posts) - - Show Bio

Ok, planning on something. Might take a few though!

EDIT: Yes, I know that I have promised to write something (and haven't) for the last three comps. But really this time, I've got something in the works.

#13 Edited by Gruiel (29 posts) - - Show Bio

Name: Daniel Wesley

Pirate Name: Dread Pirate Danger

Height: 5'4"

Hair Color: Dark Brown

Eye Color: Hazel Brown

Species: Human

Weight: 119 lbs.

Body type: Super Skinny

Personality: People sees him as sensible, cautious, careful and practical. They sees him as clever, Imagination, Sly, gifted, or talented, but modest. Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who's extremely loyal to friends he does make and who expect the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know him realize it takes a lot to shake his trust in his friendship, but equally that it takes him a long time to get over it if that trust is ever broken.

#14 Posted by Mr_Stagger_Lee (174 posts) - - Show Bio

@Gruiel: Nice idea, put it into a story and you've got yourself an entry! :D

#15 Posted by batkevin74 (10443 posts) - - Show Bio

@WhiteSGPlayer said:

@Gruiel: Nice idea, put it into a story and you've got yourself an entry! :D

I concur, great set up though

#16 Posted by Gruiel (29 posts) - - Show Bio

@Gruiel said:

Name: Daniel Wesley

Pirate Name: Dread Pirate Danger

Height: 5'4"

Hair Color: Dark Brown

Eye Color: Hazel Brown

Species: Human

Weight: 119 lbs.

Body type: Super Skinny

Personality: People sees him as sensible, cautious, careful and practical. They sees him as clever, Imagination, Sly, gifted, or talented, but modest. Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who's extremely loyal to friends he does make and who expect the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know him realize it takes a lot to shake his trust in his friendship, but equally that it takes him a long time to get over it if that trust is ever broken.

Here's the STORY:

http://www.comicvine.com/forums/fan-fic/8/star-wars-daniel-wesley-ocs-story/753851/

#17 Posted by cbishop (7207 posts) - - Show Bio

Man, I knew I didn't know the Star Wars universe that well, outside of the movies, but sheesh. I got a feeling I'll be last minute on this one, if at all.

#18 Posted by cbishop (7207 posts) - - Show Bio

@Gruiel: Read your story. It needs a lot of spelling and grammar work, but as you're the only entrant so far, good for you, mate! However, one key phrase to remember with Star Wars: "A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away." Earth would not interact with Star Wars. Good thing this is fan fic tho', huh?

#19 Edited by dngn4774 (2803 posts) - - Show Bio

Wow! This is my first contest submission so I decided to do something light. It's a short,first person narrative and I hope you guys like it. Anyway here's my OC:

Name: Eirik Eden

Title: Darth Verudan (Sith Lord)

Time Era: The Old Republic

Aliases: The Phantom Lord, Phantom Lord Verudan

Height: 5'10"

Weight: 185 lbs (84 kg)

Age: Mid-Late 40's

Hair: Light Blond, Slightly Grayish

Eyes: Pale Blue

Personality: Unusually calm, especially in situations that would provoke anger or panic. Verudan has been known to organize thoughts and implement strategies, even under the most chaotic circumstances.

Memoirs of Eirik Eden

…I was born into House Eden on Alderaan. We were a moderately powerful family of nobles in Alderaan’s political theater. Each member within our clan was a high ranking individual; my parents Lucien and Allanah Eden served on the High Council and my elder brother Aldus was a Fleet Commander for the Republic. For as long as I could remember, my father’s ambitions put a great deal of pressure on all of us to succeed. There wasn’t really room for much playtime, let alone an actual childhood but being an Eden certainly had its advantages. My family’s estate granted me access to the finest art, cuisine, and education in the entire galaxy.

Even as a child I displayed a substantial amount of force sensitivity. Once father discovered this I was sent away to train with the jedi so that I would bring honor and strengthen the name of my house. In the short time I spent training at the temple; I quickly became a stand-out amongst all of the other padawans. This achievement was insignificant, since I already knew that for an Eden failure was never an option. By the age of 15 I was on the verge of becoming the youngest knight of the jedi order. My ascension would have been assured if it were not for the malignant rumors that were spread that were spread against my House on Alderaan. My family was accused of high treason for plotting a coup against the royal family. Before any details of this coup could ever be confirmed, my parents were arrested, tried, and executed by the Queen. The cold monarch demanded my extradition to Alderaan to face trial. Despite the Jedi Order’s reluctance, they ultimately agreed to appease the Queen’s demands.

On the transport ship to Alderaan I calmly meditated, it seemed like the only thing I could control at that time. As I waiting the same fate as my parents the ship was bombarded with fire. My brother Aldus had managed to escape imprisonment and launched an all-out assault to rescue me. The battle was short but fierce, though Aldus was able to take control of the ship; the victory was short lived. He was fatally wounded and knew that his end was near. We were facing an imminent threat of enemy reinforcements. In his final moments, Aldus gave me a holocron to deliver to the emperor and informed him of the true origin of House Eden. He revealed that the rumors were true and for generations, the Edens had been a family of sith infiltrators. He ordered his most trusted agents to escort me onto a personal cruiser thus securing my escape. Once The Ebb Tide (name of cruiser) traveled out of the blast range, my brother detonated all the charges planted on the transport ship. The explosion obliterated Aldus and the enemy’s incoming reinforcements.

After arriving on Dromund Kaas, the shock of events fade from my mind and things finally fell into perspective. My true purpose was to serve the sith empire to the best of my ability. Once I entered the Emperor’s chambers I reported all of the events that led up to his arrival. I delivered the holocron and pledged my unwavering loyalty to the Empire. Though the Emperor was intrigued with me, he was unsure if the jedi teachings at the temple had tainted my reasoning. He ordered me to kill my brother’s remaining staff and without any hesitation, I struck down each agent and kneeled before my new master. In that moment Eirik Eden had dead and Darth Verudan was born.

Throughout my many years of service to the emperor, I became one of the empire’s most valuable assets. I’ve played my role in almost every successful endeavor of the empire from the retrieval of Korriban to the sacking of Coruscant. Despite these impressive feats on the field, I remained alienated from the majority of the Dark Council. My fellow Sith Lords frowned upon my care-free attitude. In fact, some were actually foolish enough confuse my more light side decisions with weakness, though, those Sith had abnormally short lifespans. In my more recent years I began to train two apprentices in the ways of the force. Due to some methods that I’d prefer to keep discreet, my apprentices and I were known as “The Phantom Lords.” I suppose I could go into more details, but that is a story for another time…

This was fun! I'd like to thank Allie_Ho for the topic, all the people who took the time to read this and anyone who votes for me. I'd also like to wish my fellow contestants good luck on their entries too.

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#20 Edited by Gruiel (29 posts) - - Show Bio

@cbishop: Can you help with the grammar? What should my character's home planet should be then?

#21 Posted by cbishop (7207 posts) - - Show Bio

@Gruiel said:

@cbishop: Can you help with the grammar? What should my character's home planet should be then?

Honestly, I'm not even sure I'm going to finish my own entry for this contest. And I'm not necessarily saying you should change the home planet. I'm saying that it's Star Wars, and Earth wouldn't figure into it, BUT this is fanfic, so do whatever you want (within Allie_Ho's rules).

#22 Edited by cbishop (7207 posts) - - Show Bio

I went short this time: only 840 words.

Tubacca ran through the forest, a band of Ewoks chittering behind him, not really keeping up, but trying to corral him with their numbers. He made a wide jump over a deep stream - a jump the Ewoks would not be able to make with their short little legs. Tubacca arfed with laughter and growled triumphantly at having lost his pursuers. Another step of this training gauntlet complete. He'd done well, so far.

A sound from above caught his attention, and he caught site of some training spheres dropping down towards him. He snarled as he deflected lasers with his lightsaber, returning fire with a blaster, and taking out one of the three spheres. The other two dropped in closer, firing continuously. Tubacca deflected the blasts with his lightsaber, then stabbed a hand forward, and jerked it to his right, causing one sphere to jerk to the right as well, crashing it into the other one. There was a bright burst of sparks, and then Tubacca slashed through them as they fell, destroying them completely.

The band of Ewoks chittered loudly from the other side of the stream, some throwing spears that landed nowhere close to Tubacca. He threw his arms in the air and yelled back at them, causing them to jump up and down and shake their fists. It made the wookie laugh, and then he turned and continued through the forest.

He was headed for the next obstacle when something whined by him on his left. He turned his head towards the noise, only to have something whine by on his right, and before he could look back there, another whined by in front of him. Speeder bikes! These weren't part of the training! He'd been found by Imperial stormtroopers - he was now being hunted!

Tubacca quickly scaled a tree, a laser just missing him, as a stormtrooper zoomed by again. The wookie snarled and fired his blaster, causing the trooper to veer at a crucial moment, crashing bike and rider into a tree.

He leaped at the next rider, knocking the trooper off of the bike, which continued on until it met an obstacle and exploded. Before Tubacca could hit the trooper again, the third speeder bike shot by him, and he was knocked off his feet by a blow to the shoulder. Tubacca got up and ran, the trooper giving chase, until he cornered the wookie at a sheer dropoff, that ended in a tumultuous river, far below.

The young wookie was huffing deeply, but turned to face his pursuer. Rather than drive him off the cliff, the last trooper slowed, landed, and dismounted the bike, about twenty yards away from him. "Drop your weapons!" commanded the stormtrooper.

Tubacca growled defiantly, but when the trooper said, "I won't tell you again! Drop your weapons," he snuffled indignantly and dropped his blaster and lightsaber to either side of him. The trooper lowered his gun a little, and Tubacca chortled as he put his hands out, and knocked him over backwards with the Force.

He was still chortling when there was a sound of jets, and he was suddenly knocked down from behind. The flyer landed as Tubacca picked himself up. "You are ordered to surrender to Boba Fett, in the name of the Empire," said the bounty hunter.

Tubacca's hand shot out, and his lightsaber started to slide towards him, only to be shot away by Fett's blaster. Tubacca looked up at the hunter and growled. Fett tossed his blaster aside, and said, "You think you've got what it takes, padawan? Let's see."

Recovering, the stormtrooper warned, "Be careful, sir! He's a skilled jedi!"

"Nonsense!" said Fett. "There will never be a jedi wookie. I don't care how many lightsabers he holds. You know why?" asked Fett, as he dodged a lunge from Tubacca.

"No, sir," answered the trooper.

"Then just watch," answered Fett. The wookie and the bounty hunter circled each other, and then charged. Armor met heavy wookie limbs, and the two traded punches, until they both stumbled backwards and fell down.

Tubacca got to all fours, shook himself, and growled. As he started to stand, Fett got to his feet, weilding a tree branch. The wookie cocked his head to one side, and whined slightly.

"You like this?" asked Fett. "C'mon, you want this?"

Tubacca took a couple hesitant steps forward, raising one hand slightly.

"You want this?" Fett said a little louder, waving the branch back and forth before him.

Tubacca's growl got a little louder, and he jumped up and down a couple of times.

"You want this?!" shouted the hunter.

Tubacca snarled and ran forward.

"Then go get it!" Fett declared, and he hurled the branch beyond the edge of the dropoff.

Tubacca lunged forward, soaring off the edge of the cliff, a frustrated howl trailing the falling wookie and tumbling branch.

As the stormtrooper joined Fett at the edge of the dropoff, looking below, Fett said, "That is why there will never be a jedi wookie. Let's go."

, , : are y'all entering this time? I didn't think I was going to make it, but here it is.

#23 Posted by stumpy49er (609 posts) - - Show Bio

I wrote mine today, pen and paper. I'll get it on here tomorrow after work. I work at 5 a.m. tomorrow {groan}. It's hefty, a little over 1600 words. I really like it though.

#24 Edited by stumpy49er (609 posts) - - Show Bio

Warning: It's a bit long.

The story of Gunner LeRaine.

Gunner LeRaine was playing Rodian Roulette and he was winning. Gunner was a tall, thin faced man with dark, slicked back hair and a thin mustache. Standing next to him was a beautiful, green skinned Twi'lek woman wearing a black dress.

"Play carefully, dear." the Twi'lek woman said to Gunner.

"You know me, my dear Radiance." said Gunner with a roguish grin. "I never play carefully."

Gunner went all in, placing his bet on 56 green. The Rodian dealer spun the wheel and dropped the laser ball. Everyone at the table watched with hesitation as the laser ball spun, eventually landing on 56 green.The crowd cheered for Gunner. Radiance looked annoyed, as did the Rodian dealer as he handed Gunner his credits.

"We should leave now." Radiance whispered to Gunner.

"But I'm winning!" Gunner said with a smile.

"You're drawing too much attention." Radiance replied.

Gunner grabbed Radiance by the hips and pulled her to him, kissing her on the lips.

"By the force, I love you, Radiance." Gunner said

"Are you on spices?" she asked him, taken aback by his boldness.

"I'm having a good day. I'll play one more round, then I'll leave. Go prepare the ship." he said to Radiance.

Radiance looked at him with caution and said "Be.."

"..careful!" Gunner finished for her.

Radiance shook her head. "I love you too." she told him before leaving.

As Radiance walked away Gunner looked at her, remembering the first time he met her. She was a slave for the Hutts, used as a dance girl. When he first saw her, he looked into her sad yet beautiful eyes and immediately fell in love.

He challenged the Hutt who owned her to a card game. The stakes, Radiance for Gunners ship, The Lucky Sparrow. The Hutt, Irkma was not as powerful minded as his distant cousin, Jabba and he accepted the terms right away.

Gunner beat Irkma. Little did Irkma know that Gunner had limited use of the force that helped him win at gambling. He was also able to use a suggestive 'mind trick' that helped Gunner convince Irkma that not only had Gunner won fair, but that Irkma shouldn't seek vengeance and to let Gunner and Radiance leave.

That was over two years ago. Gunner and Radiance had flown from star system to star system, escaping the Hutts wrath. When word got out that a low life scoundrel had so easily conned a Hutt, the Hutts were enraged. Rumor was that Jabba had his cousin Irkma thrown into the Sarlac Pit. A huge bounty was put on both Gunner and Radiance's heads.

Gunner came back to the present, as the Rodian dealer was asking him if he wanted to place a bet. Gunner placed a tenth of his winnings on 26 blue, which he knew he'd lose. That was usually Gunners way of gambling. Win big but also lose small to draw attention away from his powers.

After losing that round Gunner collected his winnings and began to leave the Rodian casino. As Gunner left the casino he thought back to his younger days learning to be a smuggler. Gunner was raised as a smuggler. His mother, Sara, took Gunner to live with her and her brother, Captain Remy LeRaine, on his ship The Starlight's Gambit. Uncle Remy taught Sara and Gunner the ways of being a smuggler.

His mother took some time getting used to this new lifestyle. Before this she was married to Gunners father, a Jedi Knight, William "Bill" Cloudburst. Bill was a great warrior, who taught Gunner the ways of the force until Gunner was seven years old. Bill was killed by Darth Vader. The story was that Bill had cut down twenty storm troopers and had taken over a half dozen laser blasts before he was cut down by Vader himself.

When word had gotten back to Gunners mother, she fled, changing her and Gunners name back to LeRaine, then she sought shelter from the one person she could trust, her brother Remy.

While his mother took time getting used to this lifestyle, Gunner on the other hand had fallen in love with it. He loved the adventure of it, he loved the idea of breaking the Empires laws and his uncle Remy taught him everything about not only being a smuggler but being a criminal.

As Gunner walked through the ship docks he came across a Wanted poster of an old friend/rival of his, Han Solo. Gunner thought back to his younger days when him and Han would be hired for the same missions, be chasing the same girl or just arguing with each other as they gambled each other. Han learned quickly not to bother gambling with Gunner, but he never stopped arguing with him. Gunner wondered where Han was hiding out. Smiling Gunner thought to himself "Probably just hanging out at Mos Eisley, looking for some quick cash."

As Gunner walked away from the poster he felt a disturbance in the force. "Bounty hunters!" he said to himself. He ran back to the ship, his mind on Radiance.

When Gunner got back to The Lucky Sparrow he saw immediately it was badly damaged with laser blasts and a big gaping hole in the side, with exposed wires dangling from it, hissing at the ground.

Gunner ran to his ship screaming "Radiance! Where are you?"

"You won't find her in there." said a robotic voice to his right.

Gunner drew his blaster on the robot, a crimson colored 3po protocol droid.

"Where is she?" Gunner screamed at the crimson droid.

"An associate of ours has her." the droid answered.

"Ours?" Gunner quickly picked up on the droids slip.

Just then Gunner heard a roar from above him.Looking up Gunner see's a huge black furred Wookie jump down at Gunner from the ship. The Wookie grabbed Gunner and slammed him to the side of the ship. The Wookie had black fur with a white stripe that went down the middle. His right face, shoulder and arm, which was holding Gunner, were cybernetic.Gunner had heard about this cybrog Wookie and his protocol droid. The Wookie was a savage.

"I am X3po and this is my master Raikor the Ravager." the droid informed Gunner. "Your accomplice is safely with our associate Boba.."

"Fett has Radiance?" Gunner screamed.

With all his rage and will Gunner summons the force to pull a nearby swinging electrified wire from his ship right into Raikors metallic, cyborg arm. Using the force to escape Raikors grip right before the wire hits Raikor, Gunner rolls away from the electrified Wookie and grabs his blaster, pointing it at X3po.

"Where is Boba?" Gunner demands.

"Slave 1, his ship." X3po replies.

"Where?" Gunner demands again.

"To the east side of the docking bay. You can't miss it." X3po cries, his hands in the air. "Please don't shoot.."

BEEOORP!

Gunner blasts X3po in the face before running off for Slave 1.

As Gunner arrives at the Slave 1 he see's Radiance kneeling down in the middle of the docking station, surrounded on all sides by large crates. He see's she's tied with chains as he runs toward her, blinded by love to any danger.

He's stopped by a laser blast at his feet. Gunner looks up to see Boba Fett on top of one of the large crates, pointing his laser rifle at Gunner.

"Surrender!" the bounty hunter demands.

Gunner points his blaster at Boba and fires. Boba quickly dodges the blast.

As Gunner takes aim to shoot at Boba again, his blaster is suddenly pulled from his grasp. Gunner looks in horror as Darth Vader strolls out of the shadows of the crates, flanked by about thirty storm troopers.

Gunner falls to his knees as Darth Vader uses his force grip to choke Gunner. Gunner looks at Radiance, love and sorrow fill his body.

"Please! Please don't hurt her." Gunner chokes out.

Vader coldly looks from Gunner to Radiance. "Ah, young love. I will spare the Twi'lek girls life. She will be given to Boba Fett."

Gunner couldn't bare the thought. Boba would take her back to the Hutts. "No.. not that. Please!" Gunner screams out.

"Boba has earned his reward. He was the one who informed me of where you were." Vader explained to Gunner, ignoring his pleas. "You've eluded me your entire life, young Cloudburst. Using your powers to break the law and benefit yourself."

Vader draws his light saber.

Gunner LeRaine closes his eyes. He uses the power of the force in his unique way. He see's into the future. It's a gift that had helped him when he gambled so often.

Gunner looks to his own future, it's grim and ends soon. He then looks into Radiance's future. His heart breaks as he see's her dancing for Jabba the Hutt. He see's Jabba make advances towards her, which she refuses. Jabba opens a trap door under her feet. Then the claws and teeth of the Rancor. A cruel fate.

Vader raises his light saber to execute Gunner. Gunner opens his eyes and smiles crazily at Vader.

"I see your future." he says.

Vader hesitates.

"I have to say, you deserve worse for everything you've done. Doesn't matter. You're basically dead already, aren't you?" Gunners face is filled with a maniacal rage. He looks at Boba Fett, who uses his jet pack to fly down next to Vader. Gunner laughs. "He gets it worse. ha ha. Oh, I wouldn't want your fate Boba, ha Ha ha." Looking back at Vader with blood lust. "You all die. You, the Emperor, ALL OF YOU. The Empire will FALL!"

VUUMMM!!!

With one downward swing of his light saber, Vader ends Gunner LeRaine.

Vader looks down at Gunners body and coldly states "Everything dies!"

Epilogue

The Starlight's Gambit flies through space, piloted by Captain Remy LeRaine. His sister, Sara sits next to him, holding a bundle in her arms. The bundle is a baby girl, half Twi'lek, half human. Her name is Star LeRaine. She begins to cry.

Her grandmother Sara comforts the baby girl. "Shhh, it's okay little Star. The Empire will never get to you. Your parents made sure of that."

#25 Posted by cbishop (7207 posts) - - Show Bio

@stumpy49er: Your character's well connected to established characters. Nice job.

#26 Posted by stumpy49er (609 posts) - - Show Bio

@cbishop: Thank you.

I enjoyed your story. The end was hilarious.

#27 Posted by Project_Worm (3348 posts) - - Show Bio

When is this contest over? I hadn't realized the topic was so awesome!

#28 Edited by cbishop (7207 posts) - - Show Bio

@stumpy49er said:

@cbishop: Thank you.

I enjoyed your story. The end was hilarious.

Thanks. I saw the ending, and just knew I had to write it. Couldn't help it. lol

@Project_Worm said:

When is this contest over? I hadn't realized the topic was so awesome!

Per :

The deadline is ...March 9th at 11:59:59 PM Pacific Time.

: Btw, liked yours as well. :)

I hope you guys are thinking of a topic for the next contest - either of you could win the vote, as it stands now. ;)

#29 Posted by dngn4774 (2803 posts) - - Show Bio

I've already have a topic in mind, but I don't want to jinx it xD!

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#30 Posted by stumpy49er (609 posts) - - Show Bio

@dngn4774 said:

I've already have a topic in mind, but I don't want to jinx it xD!

Yup! Me too.

#31 Posted by dngn4774 (2803 posts) - - Show Bio

I'm surprised more people didn't participate, this was an awesome topic.

Online
#32 Edited by stumpy49er (609 posts) - - Show Bio

@dngn4774 said:

I'm surprised more people didn't participate, this was an awesome topic.

Yeah, I really hope more people do enter before it's over. This is my first time entering a story for this and it'd be cool if there were more competition.

Maybe everyone's too busy with school.

Good story by the way.

#33 Posted by dngn4774 (2803 posts) - - Show Bio

Thanks yours was good too. I especially liked the ending.

Vader looks down at Gunners body and coldly states "Everything dies!"

That was my favorite line.

Online
#34 Posted by batkevin74 (10443 posts) - - Show Bio

@Allie_Ho: Last minute short entry, sorry!

**

“I am Loman Terrix!” I said to the others who crowded the turbolift “I am the terror of Utapau! The slayer of many!”

The five others barely acknowleged my presecence. I had seen some before, knew others by reputation: Dengar, Bossk, IG-88, Zuckuss and the infamous Boba Fett. We had all come out of the woodwork to claim the bounty on someone called Solo.

“You can all leave now!” I told them “The bounty is mine!”

“Shut! Up!” barked Boba Fett as the lift shuddered to a halt and the door opened. Zuckuss stepped out first followed by Dengar, as Fett went to leave I grabbed him by the shoulder and spun him around.

“You should be careful who you…”

My words ended as Boba Fett raised his disintergrator pistol and hit me in the chest, turning it into brittle ash. I fell forward and collapsed on the ground trying to suck in air. Bossk stepped over me chuckling. I gasped like a dehydrated Mon Calamari. Admiral Piet’s words sent me off into the cold abyss

“Bounty hunters! We don’t need their scum"

#35 Posted by cbishop (7207 posts) - - Show Bio

@dngn4774 said:

I'm surprised more people didn't participate, this was an awesome topic.

@stumpy49er said:

Yeah, I really hope more people do enter before it's over. This is my first time entering a story for this and it'd be cool if there were more competition.

The last couple contests were kind of specific in the challenge, and it turned out to be tough on some, so it dragged a little. This one being specific too, I think maybe people needed a break... so not as many entrants. Honestly, I didn't think I was going to have anything this time, but I managed to find it. BUT, the only reason I did was because I forced myself to - my personal challenge to myself is to participate in as many of these as is humanly possible.

All that said, the next contest should probably be something more generic, like the first three or four contests, so that people can be a little freer with what they write. It's a little more relaxing.

@dngn4774 said:

Thanks yours was good too. I especially liked the ending.

Vader looks down at Gunners body and coldly states "Everything dies!"

That was my favorite line.

I liked that line too. I felt like Vader was pretty well in character for this story.

@batkevin74: Liked your story as always, sir. I think it's funny that almost every entry has killed the original character by the end. lol It's like everyone went, "Hi, don't mind me. I just want to see how this character works in the Star Wars universe, and oh, yeah, that works great. Now <SqUiSh> you'll never have to see us again. Thanks for having me, I'll be going now." lol

#36 Posted by cbishop (7207 posts) - - Show Bio

: Are you going to meet your own deadline?! Winner has to defend her title! ;)

#37 Posted by wildvine (8438 posts) - - Show Bio

Just read your story. Sorry for the late comment. Never got the message. Nice story, and a very unexpected ending. XD

#38 Edited by wildvine (8438 posts) - - Show Bio

I know the rules said no crossovers, but nothing was said of 'what if' type stories. Also, since Madame Techia is my character, so I think I'm just inside the rules.

"What was this wretched specimen?" Madame Techia asked, curiously, starring at the charred, tormented creature on the operating table. Perhaps, charred remains would have been more appropriate, as it stubbornly clung to life. She couldn't help but respect its drive to live. To continue on, regardless of the cost. Behind her, her companion Adalric's joints wheezed quietly as he crossed her arms. He was one of her first upgrades, and he was outlasting some of the modern droids being assembled. A testament of her skills in the field of bio-mechanics.

"Lord Vader is human." Plapentine rasped. "No complicated alien appendages to replicate."

"This will require radical tissue augmentation." She said thoughtfully, and felt for her pipe out of reflex, then remembered where she was. This would require less work then Grievous had, but this time she would have to implant some mech-organic organs. Something like excitement flashed across her human eye. Her robot eye simply glowed. "have him sent to the medical wing immediately." She turned and walked away, her cape fluttered behind her. Adalric fell into line three steps behind her, as he always did.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The room was improperly lighted, but the medi-droids needed no light, and she needed little with her robotic eye. "Throat lining is burned, will have to remove much of it. Start removing his skin." She told a medi-bot. "Its unsalvageable. Ready the skinthetic replacement." His lungs were barely functional. She would need to recreate his entire breathing system. New lungs, bio-filters, resperator. Do to the complexity of the the system, and the technology at hand, the breathing mask would have to be nigh unremovable. The limbs would be relatively easy to replace, as such technology already existed. She would leave such mundane tasks to the medi-droids. She slowly reclosed his chest, and felt a pang of jealousy, that he had endured such extensive surgery. She could only imagine the exquisite pain he would feel later. "Adalric, have you recorded this surgery for future viewing?"

Adalric waved his hand in front of his face to indicate the affirmative. "Good, then we'll let ourselves out. The droids can finish this." Adalric put two fingers to his mask, above hi left eye, a question. "I trust Palpentine as far as I can toss him. About twenty feet by my estimate." She flexed a robot hand. "But today was productive for us both. Vader here will live on," Shecarrased her robot hand down his arm. "A god among men. And I have advanced the possibilities of surgical technology. I am one step closer to immortality Adalric. One big step closer." Adalric bowed deeply as she passed, and fell into line three steps behind her, as he always did.

#39 Posted by batkevin74 (10443 posts) - - Show Bio

@cbishop: Well the deadline (its today isn't it...yesterday in Australia) was looming and that's all the Star War-ness I had under my belt to muster. Besides I don't want to mess with the classics, besides it leads into Vader's famous warning to Boba Fett "No disintergration" :)

#40 Posted by Allie_Ho (151 posts) - - Show Bio

I'm finally done and yes it's a rush job.

I, Shadow and Making Up

By: Allie Ho

A cry of outrage shattered the peace of an otherwise tidy room. Inside, a completely hair razed man towered over a shorter with a noir mane dame.

Oh I’m sorry, I forgot to introduce things. The tidy room is in the , the man that has no hair is Master Mace Windu, and the lady? The Jedi Knight Mei Dei who is I. I’ll explain things later on.

“What!” That was the word which started me on a roll.

“Why do you want to send me on a mission because you were mad at someone else?” I protested with a hint of a whine.

The master chuckled, “Because you haven’t gone on a mission since the Clone Wars ended and you need that exercise.”

“Hey, I’ve been very busy. I’m working on helping in the Library and just so you know, there are more books there than all the Jedi that there were. Besides, my master and the Councillor won’t allow it.”

My master is the fun but really serious Jedi Master, Yoda and the Councillor is Councillor Palpatine for some reason. I don’t get why he liked me when I was talking like a Holonet newscast channel, never-ending and sometimes very annoying

“Well I think Master Yoda approves, in fact he’s designed harder exercises for younglings when I was one and Palpatine…”, he paused for a second, “he’s just a councillor and isn’t in charge of your missions or anyone else’s.” His tone of voice grew colder but ebbed like a pasting tide.

“Let me repeat the mission again for you personally, you’ll be infiltrating a Separatist ship and destroy it. Why? It’s one of the key ships and it has a person we want to Count out.”

“Dooku. Really, he’s still alive?” I exclaimed, Windu gave me a strong nod.

“Yes, now get going before he heads back towards his stronghold.” He sounded a bit uncomfortable.

“Yes, Master.” I gave a curt nod and ran towards my gunship, Curator in the hanger. It took a few ignitions for the stubborn ship to fire up but when it did, it purred and I input the coordinates and it bounced out of the Coruscanti sky and into hyperspace.

Now, here’s some time for a little history on the Curator. It was a gift from the Councillor who bought it fresh and directly from a Corellian factory. Now how he could afford that amount of credits is mysterious along with me often being stalked and receiving a salary from him.

The ship jumped out of hyperspace 3 minutes after entering it, enough to change my appearance completely. Within seconds, I completed the boring universal procedures for starships boarding bigger ones: comming the ship, give access codes, let them open a spare port and get out of ship.

The ship’s bridge crashed to the ground, I jumped a bit but I whipped myself to walk into the hanger overflowing with droids and up into the den of the Sith.

In fact, it was very easier done than thought, other than a few stale stares from droids, it looked normal for a carrier, with the chaos of moving engineers and pilots scrambling to tend to arriving ships, broken ship parts and departing ones. I gave a quick prayer that when I destroyed the ship, their deaths would be quick.

I moved towards each door and elevator and every second loosened my nervousness and allowed me to strategize what to do when I enter.

I reached his main chambers and at the doors were a few droids. I used the Force and whispered to them what I want them to do and say and they let me in.

A few seconds later, my plan evaporated almost immediately, turns out the main reactor of the ship is also in the room which he’s in, surrounded by hundreds of operators and droids. I smiled and did the most logical thing I could do at that point, I made up a whopper so big that’s believable and shouted it throughout the entire room.

“A Republic fleet is coming, a Republic fleet is coming!” I repeated the phrase causing reactions ranging from turned heads to some screaming. I around and made an intentional bump into the Count itself, who is a lot bulkier than he looks. His eyes became calculating and hostile.

“What seems to be the problem?” I threw out a small sound, somewhere between the howl of a Wookie and the mating call of a bantha. “Hello, I’m a friend of Ventress and I work in the department that doesn’t exist.”

His ears perked up and dismissed everyone in the room besides me.

“Really, Ventress has friends?” He mused over the words. “It’s not what you think of sir, I’m closer to a close acquaintance due to her line of work.” I blurt out; hoping he’s doesn’t catch too much knowledge.

“And what does Miss Ventress tell you?” He asked in a deliberate slow voice. “Oh not much, she says that it’s messy and may look bad and there’s no insurance but her salary and bonuses are great.”

“I’m glad to hear it but there’s one question I have to ask you.” “Yes.” “If you’re a spy, then why are you wearing a pilot’s uniform-”

That’s enough chit-chat even for a talker like me, I was planning to come up with excuses for those but I’m out of time so I whipped out my trusty lightsaber and as a guy who wrote how to duel, he knew and blocked my shot.

“I always knew you felt.” He swung his lightsaber around in a deadly arc, “Yeah, yeah. If you had half a brain you would’ve picked my signature a while ago when I went in.” I parried and cartwheeled towards the reactor. I spoke with him no more, instead I went on to create chaos and take away his Force advantage by breaking anything that’s big and can be detachable while he pursued me, saving me some energy. His strokes are pure strategic and with him always trying to find weak spots but I just keep my distance and try to wear him down which is difficult. “If he wasn’t a Sith and creating his own party, I’ve been impressed

Finally, I try something that’s pure idiocy, and bordering on lunacy. I Force pushed myself backwards into the reactor shell with a sharp snap from my back and attached several bombs onto it. I also dropped a little piece of paper onto the floor and before he can run out of the room run to the hanger and fly the ship out of the dock. When I just about to start the hyperspace drive, a glorious iron red explosion rocked space. I smiled and hit the button back to safe haven.

“So what did you write on that note?” Mace Windu asked after I recounted the story. “I wrote ‘This ship will explode in ten seconds and Master Yoda doesn’t miss you’ with a rough sketch of Yoda sticking his tongue out.” I began to laugh and he joined in seconds later.

“Now,” I said to the ceiling, “I truly know what being a shadow and making up things can really save me.” I gave a lopsided grin and went back to my room.I, Shadow and Making Up

By: Allie Ho

A cry of outrage shattered the peace of an otherwise tidy room. Inside, a completely hair razed man towered over a shorter with a noir mane dame.

Oh I’m sorry, I forgot to introduce things. The tidy room is in the , the man that has no hair is Master Mace Windu, and the lady? The Jedi Knight Mei Dei who is I. I’ll explain things later on.

“What!” That was the word which started me on a roll.

“Why do you want to send me on a mission because you were mad at someone else?” I protested with a hint of a whine.

The master chuckled, “Because you haven’t gone on a mission since the Clone Wars ended and you need that exercise.”

“Hey, I’ve been very busy. I’m working on helping in the Library and just so you know, there are more books there than all the Jedi that there were. Besides, my master and the Councillor won’t allow it.”

My master is the fun but really serious Jedi Master, Yoda and the Councillor is Councillor Palpatine for some reason. I don’t get why he liked me when I was talking like a Holonet newscast channel, never-ending and sometimes very annoying

“Well I think Master Yoda approves, in fact he’s designed harder exercises for younglings when I was one and Palpatine…”, he paused for a second, “he’s just a councillor and isn’t in charge of your missions or anyone else’s.” His tone of voice grew colder but ebbed like a pasting tide.

“Let me repeat the mission again for you personally, you’ll be infiltrating a Separatist ship and destroy it. Why? It’s one of the key ships and it has a person we want to Count out.”

“Dooku. Really, he’s still alive?” I exclaimed, Windu gave me a strong nod.

“Yes, now get going before he heads back towards his stronghold.” He sounded a bit uncomfortable.

“Yes, Master.” I gave a curt nod and ran towards my gunship, Curator in the hanger. It took a few ignitions for the stubborn ship to fire up but when it did, it purred and I input the coordinates and it bounced out of the Coruscanti sky and into hyperspace.

Now, here’s some time for a little history on the Curator. It was a gift from the Councillor who bought it fresh and directly from a Corellian factory. Now how he could afford that amount of credits is mysterious along with me often being stalked and receiving a salary from him.

The ship jumped out of hyperspace 3 minutes after entering it, enough to change my appearance completely. Within seconds, I completed the boring universal procedures for starships boarding bigger ones: comming the ship, give access codes, let them open a spare port and get out of ship.

The ship’s bridge crashed to the ground, I jumped a bit but I whipped myself to walk into the hanger overflowing with droids and up into the den of the Sith.

In fact, it was very easier done than thought, other than a few stale stares from droids, it looked normal for a carrier, with the chaos of moving engineers and pilots scrambling to tend to arriving ships, broken ship parts and departing ones. I gave a quick prayer that when I destroyed the ship, their deaths would be quick.

I moved towards each door and elevator and every second loosened my nervousness and allowed me to strategize what to do when I enter.

I reached his main chambers and at the doors were a few droids. I used the Force and whispered to them what I want them to do and say and they let me in.

A few seconds later, my plan evaporated almost immediately, turns out the main reactor of the ship is also in the room which he’s in, surrounded by hundreds of operators and droids. I smiled and did the most logical thing I could do at that point, I made up a whopper so big that’s believable and shouted it throughout the entire room.

“A Republic fleet is coming, a Republic fleet is coming!” I repeated the phrase causing reactions ranging from turned heads to some screaming. I around and made an intentional bump into the Count itself, who is a lot bulkier than he looks. His eyes became calculating and hostile.

“What seems to be the problem?” I threw out a small sound, somewhere between the howl of a Wookie and the mating call of a bantha. “Hello, I’m a friend of Ventress and I work in the department that doesn’t exist.”

His ears perked up and dismissed everyone in the room besides me.

“Really, Ventress has friends?” He mused over the words. “It’s not what you think of sir, I’m closer to a close acquaintance due to her line of work.” I blurt out; hoping he’s doesn’t catch too much knowledge.

“And what does Miss Ventress tell you?” He asked in a deliberate slow voice. “Oh not much, she says that it’s messy and may look bad and there’s no insurance but her salary and bonuses are great.”

“I’m glad to hear it but there’s one question I have to ask you.” “Yes.” “If you’re a spy, then why are you wearing a pilot’s uniform-”

That’s enough chit-chat even for a talker like me, I was planning to come up with excuses for those but I’m out of time so I whipped out my trusty lightsaber and as a guy who wrote how to duel, he knew and blocked my shot.

“I always knew you felt.” He swung his lightsaber around in a deadly arc, “Yeah, yeah. If you had half a brain you would’ve picked my signature a while ago when I went in.” I parried and cartwheeled towards the reactor. I spoke with him no more, instead I went on to create chaos and take away his Force advantage by breaking anything that’s big and can be detachable while he pursued me, saving me some energy. His strokes are pure strategic and with him always trying to find weak spots but I just keep my distance and try to wear him down which is difficult. “If he wasn’t a Sith and creating his own party, I’ve been impressed

Finally, I try something that’s pure idiocy, and bordering on lunacy. I Force pushed myself backwards into the reactor shell with a sharp snap from my back and attached several bombs onto it. I also dropped a little piece of paper onto the floor and before he can run out of the room run to the hanger and fly the ship out of the dock. When I just about to start the hyperspace drive, a glorious iron red explosion rocked space. I smiled and hit the button back to safe haven.

“So what did you write on that note?” Mace Windu asked after I recounted the story. “I wrote ‘This ship will explode in ten seconds and Master Yoda doesn’t miss you’ with a rough sketch of Yoda sticking his tongue out.” I began to laugh and he joined in seconds later.

“Now,” I said to the ceiling, “I truly know what being a shadow and making up things can really save me.” I gave a lopsided grin and went back to my room.

Haven't really checked it but I'll get things together better next time ;P

Also the contest is now closed. Onto the voting stage!

#41 Posted by cbishop (7207 posts) - - Show Bio

@wildvine said:

Just read your story. Sorry for the late comment. Never got the message. Nice story, and a very unexpected ending. XD

Is that a good or a bad thing? lol Personally, I thought the ending was quite fetching. ;D